I REALLY FREAKIN LOVE YOU

JUST SOME KIDS WHO WANT TO SPREAD A LIGHT. ICON FROM KARKATS-FACE-ON-THINGS. ACTIVE MODS: MOD SYL, MOD ASH, MOD NES.

[midiport]

[snackwizard]

a fools guide to not wanting to die anymore

by me, a fool who doesnt wanna die anymore 

never make a suicide joke again. yes this includes “i wanna die” as a figure of speech. swear off of it. actually make an effort to change how you think about things.

find something to compliment someone for at least 4 times a day. notice the little things about the world that make you happy, and use that to make other people happy.

talk to people. initiate conversation as often as you possibly can. keep your mind busy and you wont have to worry anymore

picture the bad intrusive thoughts in youe head as an edgy 13 year old and tell them to go be emo somewhere else

if someone makes you feel bad most of the time, stop talking to them. making yourself hang out with people who drain you is self harm. stop it.

[wildlyannoyingdoofus]

… 8|

That’s some pretty good advice. I don’t know what’s left of my humor after ‘guess I’ll just die’ jokes but it’s worth a shot.

[snackwizard]

Personally i went from “guess I’ll die” jokes to “IF I HAVE TO BE HERE FOR 5 MORE MINUTES I PROMISE YOU I WILL BUY JUST, AN ARRAY OF CLOTHES.” and other wild hyperbolic stuff. Just replace the death part with something ridiculous and off topic. Its very entertaining

[808lien]

This also works with calling myself things like stupid, worthless, trash, etc. Even if you do this jokingly to yourself, your brain still believes it, and keeps up the cycle. Seriously, I found that when I stopped saying these things about myself, even jokingly, it made a massive difference.

[maramahan]

Here’s a tip I picked up from a friend that’s helped me a lot — replace self deprecating jokes with ironically self aggrandizing jokes

Like every time I trip and fall, instead of saying “l’m just a disaster human” I say “I’m the epitome of grace and beauty”

Or like, when I draw a picture I’m not 100% happy with, instead of saying “my art is trash” I say something like “you know I think it’s time we replaced the Mona Lisa”

When you do that you get to make a joke, but you’re ALSO getting practice building yourself up, y’know?

And eventually it becomes a reflex and you get so used to it that you can say nice stuff about yourself even when you AREN’T joking

[jkl-fff]

[scottjate]

This is so important

[socialworker-rebecca]

If it’s too hard to think positive, think neutral.

I’m no better or worse than anyone else.

I deserve the same things in life as anyone else.

I’m a human being.

Right now, I am feeling ________(fill in the blank).

I don’t know how I’ll feel in 5 minutes, or tomorrow.

I can’t predict the future.

Life is full of painful, pleasurable, and boring moments.

The world is full of good, evil, and gray areas.

[anxietyproblem]

[themagicalladycat]

[penguin-and-kiwi]

I'll do it for you, creamy

[guooey]

[ihavealavalamp]

unviersity application: what are your three best qualities? me: im gay i have soft hair and sometimes i cry because i love my friends

[gaymabelpines]

“I’m gay” = I am confident in myself and my sexuality; “I have soft hair” = I take care of myself and my body well, and put effort into my appearance; and “Sometimes I cry because I love my friends” = I have a kind and compassionate heart 

there you go thats three amazing and wonderful things about you isnt that grand!!!!! good luck with those applications and live your dream!!!!!!!!

[ihavealavalamp]

this is the best response i’ve gotten on this post so far im gonna cry i love you

[missmentelle]

Is it possible to “beat” mental illness? Or does it depend on type/circumstance?

“Beating” mental illness is actually the norm, not the exception. Most people who have a major depressive episode never have another one. 80% of people who survive their first suicide attempt never make a second attempt. 93% of Borderline Personality Disorder patients achieve remission. Up to 74% of people with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder achieve significant clinical improvement in their symptoms, and 20% achieve full remission. Half of Generalized Anxiety Disorder patients achieve remission after the acute phase of treatment. Even disorders with relatively low rates of remission - bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, schizoid personality disorder - generally become milder and easier to manage as you age. Psychiatric symptoms tend to peak in your 20s and generally drop off as you get older, especially if you seek treatment. 

This is why the narratives we use to talk about mental illness matter so much. Right now, the dominant narrative is that mental illness is “an imbalance in the brain” and that it’s largely something that people are born with. There are upsides and downsides to this. The upside is that it promotes the idea that mental illness is not the ill person’s fault, and it helps us understand that mental illness can impact anyone, regardless of their life circumstances. The downside, however, is that it’s sort of given us this idea that mental illness is inborn and unchangeable. People have taken on the idea that “that’s just how my brain is”, when the reality is that, for most people, mental illness is less of a stable trait for them, and more of just a shitty thing that they are going through for a little while. The idea that mental illness is just “in your brain” also erases the very real connection between your life circumstances and your mental health - while it’s very true that a wealthy person in a happy marriage can become depressed, it’s also very true that living in poor conditions and being in an abusive marriage can be the cause of depression, and that improving your life circumstances can lessen or eliminate mental health conditions. 

If you have a mental health condition, it’s very important that you not resign yourself to the idea that you’re going to be like this forever. Chances are, you won’t. Even if you have a mental health condition that is associated with low rates of remission, it is possible to make leaps and bounds in your functioning, and to get to a point where managing your condition becomes second nature to you. Our understanding of mental illness is improving every year, and new therapies and treatments are becoming available all the time. If you seek treatment and do your best to manage your condition, you have every reason to believe that you will make huge improvements. 

Hope this answers your question!

[alwaysabeautifullife]

The only thing I want to add that while most people get their diagnosis between 14-25, they usually peak in their 30s! I actually didn’t know I had any mental illness until then, and so when I experienced this in my 30s, I didn’t associate it with a mental illness because I “never had these symptoms before”, so didn’t seek help for over a year despite how extreme they are! Only saying this for anyone who may have the same experience, a sudden and severe episode/symptoms in your 30s out of no where!

[melisica]

just in case no one told you today: - i love you - you’re doing great - i believe in you

[heavyweightheart]

my friend said that whenever she has a bad feeling about her body/appearance, she asks herself “who profits off of this emotion?” and i really love how simple and incisive that is

[bogkeep]

one of the most fucked up things about the internet is how it has given us so many new ways to self harm that we don’t even realize is self harm. it’s something i’ve seen getting addressed little by little recently, as it’s finally being recognized for what it is.

it’s the kind of addictive behaviour we engage in that doesn’t actually benefit us in any way, such as:

- Reading The Comments

- ruthless discourse that won’t accomplish anything

- checking up on people and topics you shouldn’t

- 90% of body image stuff

- constant stream of devastating news

and so on, and so on!!

there are suddenly far less barriers and boundaries between our hearts and the entire rest of the constant, churning world, and sometimes the only thing holding us back from pointless hurt is our own willpower. that’s not always gonna be enough.

we feel shame for turning off anon, for blocking those who hurt us without giving them a “fair chance” first, for leaving a discussion, for leaving a space, for going offline, for missing out. we keep martyring ourselves, and for what? our hearts are not made for this.

we’re still adapting to whatever internet culture is and does to us. remember to breathe and forgive yourself every once in a while.

[bogkeep]

small steps you can take to get out of cycles (or at least what helped me):

- take stock of just how much time, energy and emotion you pour into something that doesn’t give back, and find out what’s Gotta Go

- “i’m only going to check this thing ONCE a day”, then week, then month, but at that point you probably no longer have a strong compulsion to Check

- “i’m not going to check this upsetting thing right before bed, because it will just make it hard to sleep”

- “i’m not going to check this upsetting thing first thing in the morning, because it’ll ruin my whole day”

- forgive yourself if you fail!!!!! just breathe. take a walk

[kaylapocalypse-deactivated20201]

our hearts are not made for this

[peachie5000]

This is so important.

[spillywolf-deactivated20190920]

If courage isn’t the absence of fear but doing the right thing regardless of it, maybe confidence isn’t the absence of insecurity but knowing you have real worth despite it

[oncemylove-deactivated20180625]

this is beautiful

[randomslasher]

By this same token, maybe goodness isn’t the absence of bad thoughts or impulses, but the conscious choice to behave according to your moral ideals in spite of them. 

[magicalgirlpropaganda]

The whole self love thing is good and all but some people can’t fathom being loved. They can’t imagine there being anything good about them. So they can’t simply just stop doing unhealthy things, there’s a process.

[sandersstudies]

Before self love you have to invoke self tolerance and self neutrality.

[sandersstudies]

If you can’t say “I love my body!” say “my body gets me from place to place.”

If you can’t say “I’m beautiful,” begin by shutting down the “I’m ugly” thoughts and saying “I’m a person.”

If you can’t say “I’m valuable” begun by shutting down the “I’m worthless” thoughts and say “all people deserve basic respect, and I’m a person.”

If you can’t say “I’m important,” or “I’m kind” say “I am the one who waters my plant every week” or “I am the one who tips the kind barista down the street” or “I am the one who makes sure my dog does not eat plastic” or “I am the one who leaves long comments on people’s fan fictions.”

[chizuu-deactivated20200817]

i genuinely hope anyone ages 13-15 on this website (or, god forbid, younger) stays safe and keeps their private information secure and really private 

please, if you’re really young on tumblr, try not to get swept up in the discourse and the tremendous amount of arguing with strangers that goes on here. i know you probably feel mature for your age but this website, like, really psychologically affects youth, and i encourage you to be cautious about your interactions with people on here

 please, kiddos, stay safe

[chizuu-deactivated20200817]

additionally, for my young, non-adult followers,

depression memes about wanting to die aren’t a healthy coping mechanism and can lead to worsening symptoms of your own mental health if overindulged in

you are not garbage. or trash. i know these terms are popular on here, but you shouldn’t be calling yourself that. you have everything you need inside of you to become your best self, even if it’s hard to see that

seriously, really don’t trust adults who want to date you. don’t trust adults who call you hot, flirt with you, ask you sexual questions, or ask you for nudes. (that last one is VERY illegal, also, please get help from a trusted non-creepy adult if this happens to you)

the opinions of complete strangers who aren’t interacting with you typically aren’t worth it. move on, use the block button. it’s not worth engaging with people who are going to make you feel awful or unsafe

take breaks from tumblr if it’s getting really stressful for you. talk to friends if you’ve got em, play a videogame or do whatever it is that can take your mind off the massive amounts of Hell on this website

recovery is good. it’s really, really good. if you’re having mental health issues, please seek out help if you can, or ask a trusted adult or friend for guidance. you are not alone. don’t let this website make you feel like you are

[snackwizard]

a fools guide to not wanting to die anymore

by me, a fool who doesnt wanna die anymore 

never make a suicide joke again. yes this includes “i wanna die” as a figure of speech. swear off of it. actually make an effort to change how you think about things.

find something to compliment someone for at least 4 times a day. notice the little things about the world that make you happy, and use that to make other people happy.

talk to people. initiate conversation as often as you possibly can. keep your mind busy and you wont have to worry anymore

picture the bad intrusive thoughts in youe head as an edgy 13 year old and tell them to go be emo somewhere else

if someone makes you feel bad most of the time, stop talking to them. making yourself hang out with people who drain you is self harm. stop it.

[wildlyannoyingdoofus]

… 8|

That’s some pretty good advice. I don’t know what’s left of my humor after ‘guess I’ll just die’ jokes but it’s worth a shot.

[snackwizard]

Personally i went from “guess I’ll die” jokes to “IF I HAVE TO BE HERE FOR 5 MORE MINUTES I PROMISE YOU I WILL BUY JUST, AN ARRAY OF CLOTHES.” and other wild hyperbolic stuff. Just replace the death part with something ridiculous and off topic. Its very entertaining

[808lien]

This also works with calling myself things like stupid, worthless, trash, etc. Even if you do this jokingly to yourself, your brain still believes it, and keeps up the cycle. Seriously, I found that when I stopped saying these things about myself, even jokingly, it made a massive difference.

[maramahan]

Here’s a tip I picked up from a friend that’s helped me a lot — replace self deprecating jokes with ironically self aggrandizing jokes

Like every time I trip and fall, instead of saying “l’m just a disaster human” I say “I’m the epitome of grace and beauty”

Or like, when I draw a picture I’m not 100% happy with, instead of saying “my art is trash” I say something like “you know I think it’s time we replaced the Mona Lisa”

When you do that you get to make a joke, but you’re ALSO getting practice building yourself up, y’know?

And eventually it becomes a reflex and you get so used to it that you can say nice stuff about yourself even when you AREN’T joking

[jkl-fff]

[scottjate]

This is so important

[spoonie-living]

[Image: tweet from Heather Lindsaychen (@oceana1009): “Reframing motivation not as an act of will, but a thing that naturally occurs when I am rested, fed, and am taking things at my own slow pace has helped me a lot“]

Hey, here is a nice insight for those beating themselves up for their low motivation.

Remember that a good, healthy motivation comes when your needs are being met. That’s not always possible in this world, but being kind to yourself for the impact of that always is!

[maybe-a-lizard]

All right, another mental health post for today! THIS THING. This thing is so important.

I’ve noticed recently that I have a mental flinch response every time I consider doing something. Even a really easy pleasant thing, like going for a short walk or getting a snack from the fridge, let alone things like washing the dishes or doing work. I feel an impulse to do the thing and then I immediately shut it down and tell myself “maybe in five minutes”. This seems really bad! And I suspect it’s partially caused by forcing myself to do things, so that now when I consider doing a thing my instinctive response is “no” because I… don’t trust myself about it, if that makes any sense?

So anyway, instead of forcing myself to do things, I’ve been trying out just relaxing and doing what I want and following the random impulses, and it turns out I can 1) have fun, and 2) get decent amounts of work/etc done that way without feeling awful about it! While beating myself up about things pretty directly led to doing even fewer things in the long term, because my brain learned to associate “doing things” with unpleasantness. Don’t make your brain do that, it sucks.

(I mean, maybe for some people it doesn’t suck or is worth it anyway, everyone is different and everyone’s situations are different and all that! But it looks like for me it’s usually not. I should talk to my therapist about it.)

[spoonie-living]

This is fantastic advice and deserves its own space on the blog. That mental flinch is entirely, painfully familiar to me, and I have had the same results when I just let myself follow my inclinations.

I also want to acknowledge that we can’t always just do whatever we want willy-nilly. But noticing mental flinches (I had characterized them as a mental wall, previously)—and giving thought to what is motivating them—can lead to really useful insights.

In a similar vein is the way we build up small tasks that we’ve been putting off. I don’t know about you, maybe-a-lizard, but I get the same mental flinches with a task that’s been sitting on my to-do list for too long. I’ve realized I’m getting “nope” signals and that if I take a moment to recognize whatever is causing those (guilt, uncertainty about the first step, bad feelings etc.), I can break the current negative associations and move forward into a more constructive place.

I think connecting these things (the mechanics of motivation, mental flinches, and self-reflection) is really powerful and can help a lot when your “get up and go” is more of a “get up and no.”

Just some additional thoughts :)

❤, Editor Diane

[stimman4000]

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