I am stoned, but so is everybody else on Tumblr

Here's no life, only fandom

[tentacleteapot]

your unreliable narrator fucking bit me

[charl0ttan]

thats not how they told it

[twitblr]

Bountygate has a nice ring to it but the NFL already had one of those too

[yrfriendliz]

http://www.wsj.com/articles/BL-LB-51793 This is honest to god one of the funniest things I think I have ever seen. The idea of giving a baby a theme party based on a local personal injury attorney is something i am so jealous of I dont know how to properly put it into words. Also the fact that the lawyer didn’t come to the party somehow makes it even funnier.

[tinseltownturkey-deactivated202]

this is the kind of content i came here for

[loving-women-is-rad]

he didnt come to the party because he sees the baby as a future opponent

[babyanimalgifs]

My dog got on the news. This was my favourite bit. 

(Source)

[whitepeopletwitter]

[rican-remade-deactivated2020111]

SIGN THE PETITION HERE!!!!

[rashemibabe]

She was a 17 year old CHILD. Black children are being killed and only a handful of the community knows about it.

[arthoebyers]

you can’t make this shit up can you

[andkool]

[theweirdwideweb]

[unclebeanbag]

No, Mike Pence got fucked by a horse. How else do you get the outside of a horse inside a man? 

[raccacommie]

Better?

[unclebeanbag]

Much. 

[tradiespotter]

Horse must have been desperate

[botanyshitposts]

idk how the hell i’ve run a blog called ‘botanyshitposts’ for almost four years now without ever thinking to talk about this but in high school my little brother wanted a pet that wouldnt die so we got him a moss ball for $8 at a pet store and he named it tiki and it lives in this dedicated plastic tank at our parents’ house even though we’re both at college now. usually it doesnt do anything but over the past two weeks of winter break our family has watched in horror as it has gone about the process of slowly and ominously rising from its usual position at the depths of its abode to the top, where it now floats with gravel bits stuck to it from literal years of not moving. my mom has moved it to behind the sink so now whenever i go to wash my hands in the kitchen i have to face it and im scared

[botanyshitposts]

just squeezed all the water out of her like yall said in the replies and i put her back and shes still floating….maybe she just likes it up there

[botanyshitposts]

[botanyshitposts]

update: she sank to the bottom and stayed there for days and i thought this story was over until i WALKED OVER TO THE SINK JUST NOW

[botanyshitposts]

test: pet her, tell her she is a good moss ball

results: she sit 

[botanyshitposts]

wild things about this post:

-the amount of porn bots mass reblogging this bc of the word ‘ball’

-the amount of people with extensive knowledge about native moss ball habitats and care coming out of the woodwork to reply to this post 

-the amount of people endeared and riveted by her ongoing performance

[bombdiggity666]

I was going to post a long explanation for this diurnal migration behaviour, but I feel like a true explanation. Would just be lost.

[jklantern]

Blessed Post

[just-bog-things]

I have one too! His name is Tarim, and I got him with a friend when we went to see a real life viking ship a few times over! I love my sweet lil boyo! I hope they can be friends.

[approximately12lbs-of-ducks]

hi i was filled with a lot of love for these funky little bois and drew a thing

[botanyshitposts]

god im so glad you did

[kul5ara-blog]

why do people say innocent animal do guilty animals even exist 

[dysonairbladefan1992]

[brigwife-deactivated20240426]

[black-culture]

[temilasha]

Little louder for the fuck boy in the back.

[rhymeswithbacon]

[meeko-mar]

I’ve never actually seen what it looked like before Mt. Rushmore…it’s so saddening.

[verymememuchimpresswow]

P r e a c h

[angiethewitch]

you know what really gets me about this? there’s a photograph. people think the genocide of indigenous people was centuries ago, but here is proof that it happened when photographs were existent. proof that white imperialism was alive and kicking when photographing things was available. while the original events were longer ago than the carving, the defacing of sacred land is still happening.

[tonightweredrinkingfromthebong]

[ororomunroedontpullout]

People on Facebook got angry at him and accused him of abusing his cat because he had him in the tub “against his will” not knowing that that breed needs daily batheing to keep their coat healthy and it’s wild. He was just being positive and cute and people were shitting on him.

[barefeetinsoil]

You don’t need to bathe your cat every day. They do that themselves.

But once or twice every few months is okay to my understanding

[fragilefox]

Ravioli is a cornish rex, meaning he doesnt have fur, only “down”. cornish rexes lack the guard hairs that repel dust, allergens, grime etc and need to be fully bathed at least once every 7 days & wiped with a warm washcloth 1-2 times daily, more if the house the cat lives in is particularly dusty or has lots of airborne pathogens. it’s the same with Sphynx (hairless) cats, which iAmMoshow (the guy in the vid) also owns! iirc he has two sphynxes, ravioli, and a standard domestic shorthair. he knows what hes doing!

[mockiato-deactivated20200315]

Sometimes… pets don’t know what’s best for them!

[lovecoralei]

but even if the cat didn’t need it, set aside that it does, why would you see this man bathing his pet and being soft and gentle and telling kitty I love you…and think this is animal abuse? like ??

[ororomunroedontpullout]

It’s racism

[stupidusernamerequest-blog]

^^^ there it is

[alwaysbewoke]

Story

[forcedfarce44]

[astrodidact]

https://www.forbes.com/sites/tommybeer/2020/06/16/accused-killer-of-california-cops-was-associated-with-right-wing-boogaloo-movement/#4492a65459bd

Accused Killer Of California Cops Was Associated With Right-Wing 'Boogaloo Movement'

Steven Carrillo reportedly scrawled the word "boog" in blood on the hood of a car before being apprehended.

[sirrah1940]

The right wing is trying to start a civil war.

[srsfunny]

After all these years…

[dashaibo]

Damn, that calls for a cigarette

Hehehheh, oh whoops

[beeceit-deactivatingsoon-deacti]