casspalmer

he/they/it

[skaiawards]

juggling panic attack

[liverlemons]

WIP that may never get finished because of exams ;-;

Accessory practice, kind of.

[mx-m29]

just a normal juggling gif, nothing weird about it

[sandersstudies]

Me: Okay improv class somebody give me an occupation. :)

Class: Dentist!

Me: okay, so in this scene you are going to be a dentist. :)

Child 1: WHY DID YOU STEAL MY TEETH!

Child 2, on the floor, sobbing: I’m so sorry! I sold them on the dark web. I’m in so much debt from medical college.

[lilyvines]

exile arc but every day someone puts on a blonde wig and red n white t shirt and takes Tommy’s place as they all try to gaslight Dream

quackity: Hello it is me tommyinnit

dream: you aren’t tommyinnit and you don’t look or sound like him

quackity: *in a British accent* hello it is me tommyinnit

dream: tubbo I can see that it’s you

tubbo, wearing the ugliest blonde wig known to man: what? im tommyinnit. here I’ll prove it I just need some flint n steel and the location of your house

dream: are you ghostbur?

ghostbur: yes!

Phil: oh I forgot to tell you! Tommy’s street name is ghostbur. that’s why he said that :)

dream:

dream: oh hi “Tommy” why is your hair blue?

jack manifold, who didn’t own any other wigs: I’m going through a mid life crisis

dream: Ranboo I can see that you’re an enderman

ranboo, wearing a red and white suit: im tommyinnit. I remember everything. i can definitely swim mhm mhm

Dream: you aren’t even wearing the red and white. you’re just another blonde guy

purpled, a paid actor: wdym didn’t you know there’s only one blonde person ever. im tommyinnit

dream: technoblade what I meant to think of this

technoblade, wearing a sign that says ‘im tommyinnit’: well most people think I’m annoying at first

dream: you’re literally a pig

technoblade: that’s kinda rude to say about the British

Dream: how are you here. you’re dead.

glatt, who pierced the veil of life and death in order to make fun of tommy: no im tommyinnit. pogchamp or something

[bytemycupcakes]

This is my favorite part of Bdubs' new episode I think.

he make game too hard..... :(

[a-cipher]

important addition

[c3rvida3]

How To Tell Your Cat That You Could Walk To His Food Faster If He Weren't Weaving Under Your Fucking Feet In A Beautiful And Intricate Idiot's Ballet

[evilsoup]

how to tell human,,, "ilove you",,,

[homunculus-argument]

Relationship statuses and how much I doubt it if you add "happily" in front of it:

Happily single: I have no reason to question that, nobody else gets to decide how you feel, and I'm happy for you.

Happily dating: Kind of weird that you'd feel the need to clarify. You know you don't have to date someone who doesn't make you happy, right?

Happily engaged: Same as previous, but more so. You know you should not be getting married to someone who doesn't make you happy, right? I'm not leaving before I know that you know.

Happily married: Could go either way tbh, but most likely you are. If someone's not actually happy with their marriage, it shows, no matter what they say.

Happily divorced: Yeah this one I have no reason to doubt. Nobody says they're happy about being divorced unless they really are happy about it.

Happily widowed: I wouldn't doubt that you are but girl did you kill him.

[is-this-fascism]

hot take but i think cars should be required to have communication radios just like big semi trucks. we should all be able to talk to each other on the road. not bc this would help in any way but because i want it to sound like a counterstrike lobby every time i drive somewgere

[john-boneman-lich-lord]

"Summon ketamine ape is a banned spell" fuck it fine whatever, I summon a normal gorilla. I summon some ketamine.

[casspalmer]

[homunculus-argument]

I recall someone who'd never been to Korea complain about how the korean shows on netflix are amazingly written but the actors are always so bad and overacting in an annoying way, but it turned out that this person just had no idea that that's just how korean people talk. They'd never encountered korean culture outside of the shows, and the thought that this "flaw" they spotted in every show might just be an accurate representation of real life.

My father hated the way that american movies always had to underscore everything they wanted to say with the subtlety of an anvil. It never occurred to me to ask him why he keeps watching them if he hates them so much. He hated the lack of subtlety and was always quick to point out that these movies were made for a stupid, uneducated audience that wouldn't pick up on subtle details or context clues so everything has to be all in-your face.

Anyway I woke up this morning to news that in the US they publicly shot a guy who was known to say shit like "sometimes people get shot but that's the acceptable price for having guns everywhere" while he was sitting under a big-ass banner saying "PROVE ME WRONG".

[homunculus-argument]

Getting myself a tombstone that says "I was buried with no valuables, but if you want to steal my corpse, go ahead and grab a shovel" on it.

I want my ashes buried in an urn that's engraved with the text "lol. lmao. you fucking idiot."

[herssian]

deepen the shadows bro. it'll be ok

[herssian]

i meant art-wise but if any dark sorcerers see this. you do you

[yumitora]

the hugh dancy vs mads mikkelsen dichotomy of being a trolling little shit vs unhindered homo affirmer is so damn FUNNY it's basically hugh teasingly deadpanning "kiss? why would they kiss. every time they're alone they sit and meditate. facing away from each other" and mads just goes "to be honest i almost gave hugh some sloppy toppy in this scene as improv because i think it's what hannibal felt most viscerally towards will in the moment so i really understood the character"

[jewish-joy]

I recently got an on-campus job. During the interview process, I requested that I not be scheduled on Friday nights or Saturdays as I am a Jewish student.

My boss immeadiately brightened and rushed to explain - "Of course ! Of course! We want to accomodate you! We have another worker who takes off for Ramadan. Do you need to take off for Ramadan?"

I shook my head, incredibly confused. "Uh. That's. Not my jurisdiction. I'm good." Boss nodded but was sure to add "Let me know if that ever changes. We can help you with Ramadan."

[maimonideznuts]

[jewish-joy]

@vangoggles THAT WHAT I WAS SAYING .

And I was finally on a shift with this guy. We were both sitting in silence because we had the ass-crack-of-dawn slot.

Over my coffee and twirling my Magen David necklace around my finger, I say "So. Ahmed. Ramadan.

And Ahmed over his energy drink, sighs - "don't you say shit about that."

[jewish-joy]

#what's the bet Ahmed was just asking for certain shifts during Ramadan and Boss got excited and was like “just take the whole ramadan off!”#“don't even worry about it! we support you! take the time you need!” I'm scheduled to work with him tomorrow morning so will find out then 🫡 .We're both STEM majors who use the early empty hours to study so I will report if I get more than a grunt out of him about it.

[jewish-joy]

another stupid-early morning, and between our respective course loads- him organic chemistry and me pathophysiology- I asked for the full story in how he got all of Ramadan off.

He sighed, and let me know that he did indeed try to explain to our manager that all he needed was to get shifts not around sunrise or sunset. But that in him explaining what Ramadan was, the plot very quickly got lost into this unhinged confusion where our boss was trying to google how people could survive an entire month without food or water.

So halfway through, he decided to pivot and go along with it, expecting less shifts in March because that's a difficult academic time anyway. Then, he had to keep a straight face when the end-product was the entire time off with paid leave.

So, now, he's in a hell partially of his own making where his boss genuinely believes he doesn't eat for a month and is trying to offer all non-Christian workers March off. I offered him time off for Hanukkah. He hit his head against the desk, and groaned.

[kittydesade]

[yumitora]

i love LOVE how jack crawford's whole thing is he'll be like "will. i need to know you can find your way back. what did you feel" and will's like "i feel as if i mutilated her myself .... every waking night for the past week i've had the same dream of me, dismembering them. i commit horrors unspeakable in my mind" and jack's like ok you know you best! see you tuesday no one does it like you brother