What’s funny about being goth or punk is that kids generally aren’t scared of you. When I’m all dressed up with the big hair, dark makeup, and spiky clothes, little girls in particular treat me like I’m a disney princess
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@cat-the-runa
What’s funny about being goth or punk is that kids generally aren’t scared of you. When I’m all dressed up with the big hair, dark makeup, and spiky clothes, little girls in particular treat me like I’m a disney princess
Not to oversimplify a complex issue, but i think we could reduce the number of deadly car crashes by increasing wages and having shorter work weeks.
I just got a really really good idea for a visual gag that unfortunately only works in an animated artistic medium that uses chowder style static textures for clothes. And now I’m pissed off that I can’t find a series of words to write a description of the gag that would have any chance of working as a joke because it requires too much setup and the punchline wouldn’t be punchy in a text medium. (T ^ T)
[In a Chowder style cartoon world where clothing uses static background textures]
Character A: *Accidentally spills something on her shirt and it leaves a stain*
*Looks around to see if anyone noticed.*
*Takes a few steps to the side, moving along the static background texture causing the stain to ‘slide’ away and not be visible anymore*
[later in the episode, a completely different scene with completely different framing]
Character A: *Walks along with the rest of the cast across the screen into the same spot on the screen where she was when she spilled on her shirt. The stain was on the same spot in the background texture this whole time she just happened to avoid it throughout the episode til now. This causes the stain to ‘slide’ onto her shirt again, but shes further from the ‘camera’ now so the stain covers way more of her shirt.*
Character B: *Points the stain out and laughs at her for managing to get such a huge stain on her clothes*
Character A: *Gets embarrassed and defensive saying it’s the shot composition’s fault*
Character C: *Looks up and scolds the animator for not doing the cast’s laundry between scenes*
Faceless animator from off screen: *Tries to make excuses about not having time and trying to meet the episode deadline*
Character C: *Crosses her arms and turns her head away, says she’s disappointed in them*
Offscreen animator’s giant hand: *Reluctantly grabs the static clothing texture and pulls it away*
Character A: *Her shirt clothing texture is replaced with blank white void. She gets embarrassed and tries to cover herself up as if she was naked*
[Cut to short live action sequence of the disembodied hand of the animator throwing the static texture cloth into the washing machine, adding stain remover and starting the machine.]
[Time passes. Cut to disembodied hand tapping its fingers impatiently right before the washing machine dings complete. The hand throws it in the dryer. Resumes tapping impatiently]
[Time Passes. Cut to disembodied hand seemingly being asleep, then the dryer dings waking them up. Hand takes texture out of the dryer. Starts bringing the texture back to the set.]
Character C, offscreen: *Shouts at the animator demanding they iron it too*
[Cut to disembodied hand frantically ironing the texture.]
[Cut back to animated scene with main cast still at the same scene. Character A is still embarrassed and trying to cover herself up. Character B is asleep and loudly cartoonishly snoring. Character C is looking up at where ‘the animator’ is, impatiently tapping her foot and scowling]
Disembodied Hand: *Frantically tries to put the texture back in place. Accidentally puts it on upside down.*
Character C, scowling: *Raises an eyebrow*
Disembodied hand: *Frantically rearranges the texture and finally gets it in place correctly*
Character C, eyebrow still raised: *Asks if they’re forgetting something*
Disembodied hand, ‘standing’ on the ‘ground’ of the scene with its middle and ring finger posed as legs and its pointer and pinky as arms: *Goes into dogeza pose and desperately apologizes*
Character C: *Accepts apology, but gives a threatening warning not to let it happen again*
Disembodied hand: *’Runs’ offscreen frantically*
[The episode resumes as if nothing happened. This gag is never repeated and is never addressed for the rest of the show’s running]
I was talking to my husband the other day and, as a random example of a boring topic that nobody at a party would want to hear about, I happened to come up with, “The history of wheelbarrows.”
But then my husband and I got curious and decided to look up the history of wheelbarrows, and we both thought it was surprisingly interesting.
The very next day, we were visiting a thrift store with family and my sister spotted a toy wheelbarrow for her son, and my husband said, “Did you know that Jesus was older than wheelbarrows? They weren’t invented until around 100 CE.”
This is why curious people are my favorite type of people. No topic is really that boring when you look into it. And everything is more interesting when you talk about it with someone you love.
I sat behind the same girl in class all year and I was painfully jealous of her beautiful curly hair and I assumed she had just figured out some hair routine I didn't know, or had more time in the mornings than me, or was somehow more disciplined or just lucky. And then my friend talked to her one day and found out she gets 500$ perms and highlights 3 times a year. The answer was literally just money. The same friend found out that most of our classmates who I thought were just naturally smarter than me went to private highschools that cost 25k a year.
This is all a metaphor to say that there will be times when you feel like other people understand something that you don't, or have some ability that you don't, or are better than you in some way because they've accomplished something you can't. And it's going to turn out that they're just rich and they spent thousands of dollars to make that happen. You are not bad, you are not broken, the system is just fucked.
Totally normal for a legitimate for-profit company to refuse to reclaim or stop running their products even after they're no longer being paid to do so. I'm sure it's very normal to just keep running your service for free when your contract's been terminated. Spending money to continue running cameras that supposedly no one is looking at is definitely not an indicator they are just run by the federal government to spy on everyone and only a wacko conspiracy theorist would think so.
A Great Being's Mind
What kind of Great Being allows himself to be "fixed" by Karzahni?
The descriptions of Velika in the Saga of Ignition are clear: he was an odd, broken, clumsily-rebuilt Po-Matoran, as were all the Matoran of Voya Nui. If Velika had not been like those around him, the great surprise of his unveiling after the reformation of Spherus Magna might not have been so surprising, but a surprise it was. So a broken Matoran rebuilt by Karzahni he must have been--but why?
He was not always this way, we have learned. In all the records salvaged from the Great Spirit Robot there were still traces, for those who went looking, of the original Po-Matoran Velika. There was no longer anyone who remembered him, or any record of his assigned duties in the village where he had lived in the Northern Continent: only a single copper scrap that had survived the destruction of Karzahni's realm: the tag with which he had been sent there, only partially legible:
Velika - Po-Mato-- broken arm, uppe-- return to: East Po-Koro, Inner Po-Wahi, Nor-- Signed: Roc-
A broken arm was a minor repair, compared with most of those sent to Karzahni--at least in the later years. Once Turaga across the isles began to wonder why their Matoran never returned from their repairs, they went to greater efforts to repair their broken Matoran, sending only the most irreparably damaged to Karzahni, the realm of no return. In those later years, a broken arm alone would never have been enough. Were there more damages, unable to be read on what remains of the tag? Or was he sent there so early in Karzahni's history that no one had yet become suspicious that none had returned?
The script used on the tag argues for the possibility of the latter option. The square-printed letters include a ligature that was lost in the great time-skip, an early Artakhan script that fell out of fashion everywhere but the Western Arm. While is possible that Velika was not quite the first Matoran sent to Karzahni, it seems he was an early one.
The discovery that, in early years, Karzahni had, in fact, competently fixed and returned Matoran sent a historiographic shockwave through the Bionicle community. Their Agori neighbours understood well enough that it was a surprising unveiling of mysteries when the earliest records of the Order of Mata Nui were unsealed, but they did not understand the smaller therein that, in the first few hundred years or so, every Matoran sent to Karzahni had returned, in perfect functioning order.
What kind of Great Being would allow himself to be fixed by Karzahni?
Why did Karzahni cease to competently perform the role for which he was made?
The fools, they would never know, Velika thought, nor understand, but just has he had given them thought, so too was he able to break it. His own broken arm had been a trivial wound, but he had become bored with East Po-Koro and had relished the opportunity to travel "by chance" to realm of repair. The Matoran Universe was no longer new, exactly, but the remnants of Spherus Magna were now far enough behind that he was willing to venture about and see what his changes to the Matoran had wrought--and where better to meet Matoran from all over the universe than where they were all repaired?
Karzahni had had him prepped genially, the bound-up arm unwound and laid beside him on the sterile surface, and the gentle titan started to knit him together carefully. Velika had smirked to himself, delighted at the fullness of his deception, when something--some tiny, trivial, unknowable, unpredictable instinct had made the titan pause.
"You're a strange one, aren't you?" he mused. Sedated, Velika didn't think he should answer, and maybe the sedation had even worked on him, a little, and he did not think to stop Karzahni as the titan tapped at his head, and the casing that should have housed a melding of silicate tissues and fine circuitry opened to reveal a wrinkled, grey lump of pulsating matter.
Even if he were a half-second slow under the sedation, that half-second had now passed, and Velika was indignant at being discovered. Even as Karzahni stepped back, baffled and a bit horrified at the un-Matoran brain he had discovered, Velika's eyes lit as he "woke" fully, and his good hand clutched at Karzahni's massive hand, and the titan could not break the grip.
"I look the same, don't I?" asked the apparent Po-Matoran, "but I am not--let me show you." And, with a wrench, his grip on Karzahni linked the titan's nervous system to his own, and Velika's thoughts coursed from his brain, through the apparently-Matoran body he inhabited, and into the Karzahni's nerves, leaping to his brain in less than an instant.
The visions Velika showed him awed the titan: visions of raw elemental power, of a knowledge of energised protodermis behind that of Artakha himself, of all that had come before, and of much that had happened since, and even as Karzahni struggled to comprehend the enormity of what he had just learned, Velika reached in and erased the memory of it--and then some.
Karzahni, now and forever more thereafter the Mad Titan, stumbled about, his eyes blinking furiously, and when he had calmed himself, though the world seemed to stop spinning, he saw the half-assembled Matoran on the operating table.
"Where was I…?"
"You were just about to improve me," said Velika. "To restore me."
And Karzahni did: alone of all the Matoran that had come to him yet, he sent Velika away changed from what he had been, and alone of all the Matoran that would come thereafter, he sent Velika away with no defect, though to the eyes of one accustomed to a standard Matoran, he was no longer that. All the Matoran that Karzahni fixed thereafter would resemble him in some form, but covering defects he could no longer repair. Only, in Velika, there was no defect: this was his chosen form.
Did you know Vakama may have been a Mask Maker for less than 2 years?
Yeah, according to his Bionicle Encyclopedia entry, Vakama was asked to make the Mask of Time by the false Turaga Dume (Makuta Teridax in disguise) "shortly after being promoted to Mask Maker". Makuta was only impersonating Dume for 18 months, implying that Vakama's whole career as a Mask Maker may have only been a couple years AT MOST.
Which is fucking hilarious because of how he made being a Mask Maker his whole identity! Oh yes, this job I've been doing for a year-and-a-half, its all I am, and all I ever will be.
And also, he was claimed to be the greatest Mask Maker in Ta-Metru, and everyone believed it! Teridax went to this guy fresh out of graduation to make a reality warping Legendary Kanohi! A feat that Teridax himself tried and failed to do! Vakama was so good at his job, that Teridax, a man with a god complex so massive he LITERALLY prays to himself, decided "you know what, I think you'd do a better job than me".
Also Nurhii is officially the most valid of the Great Disk Matoran, imagine being the best at one of the most prestigious jobs in your entire civilization for potentially thousands of years, only for your apprentice to show you up only a few months after graduating. I'd crash out too!
I had already headcanoned that Vakama was the youngest Toa Metru, and possibly very young by Matoran standards, but this takes it to a whole other level! Sure, he may have spent a while as a tool maker before being promoted, but it is still solid evidence that he might actually be a baby. Imagine being the young prodigy in town, you get turned into a superhero for a few weeks, and now all of a sudden you have to be the "wise old man" because everyone you looked up to got their memories wiped.
Fucking crazy the massive implications of this one of line Greg probably wasn't even thinking too hard about. And it isn't even a forum statement, this was from the Encyclopedia, a published piece of story material!
Also in line with headcanons from @crystaltoa @bionicle-ramblings @legend-as-old-as-time, as well as some from myself that Vakama is a very young old man
I have to wonder how Whenua’s reputation held up after Vakama told his stories.
My headcanon is that Whenua is very bad at lying, but quite good at Not Technically Lying, and has gotten by on vaguely worded statements and answers along the lines of “I am sure the past will reveal its secrets in due course” for 1000 years. But I think he, and his Matoran, would know that truthfulness and true honesty are not quite the same thing.
can i practice my spells on you
been stewing on an analytical approach to fiction which I call "is this book afraid of me?" and in order to answer this question you determine how hard the book is trying to make sure you don't come after the writer on twitter
Tags via @deadpanwalking, editor and ass-kicker extraordinaire
Please keep making art. Please make it for yourself. Please don’t let everything become even more of the same flat general appeal nonsense that doesn’t seem to have anything to say
if they're gonna remake The Princess Bride, it should open with a kid sick in bed scrolling on his phone. his grandpa arrives with a gift--it's a DVD player with a disc already inside. grandpa hooks it up to the TV and presses play. and we all just watch the original 1987 film again.
if a terf even looks at this they will die in seven days just to clarify
now that the curtain has been pulled back on that transmascvoicesproject bullshit can I just reiterate that this all has genuinely reinstated my faith in my transmasc brothers?
don't get me wrong some of you were dipshits and bought in, but so many of you completely rejected and pushed back against that transmisogynistic filth, and I saw that and I deeply appreciated it. I'll still hurl your xbox 360 out the window if you're misogynistic to me, but ngl I'm really hoping we can sit down and play viva piñata instead 🫶
How to instantly catch every archer's attention around the world.