When I first looked into her eyes; I could immediately tell that she looked terrified. With everything that she had been through; who would’ve known that she had trouble with love? Mair is so sweet I, just don’t get how she can get depressed. Mair’s hairs reminds me of sand since it’s so blonde, and her skin is so fair. Yet, she look just like her mother; a spitting resemblance really.
“Mair, let's go to your therapy appointment!”
As she hurries down the stairs, I saw that she is smiling. I crack a small smile in response. Just then she looks up at me, and she loses her lovely smile. Knowing that her smile won't come back we leave the house, all locked up. We both get inside my 2002 navy blue Hummer, and my one and only Mair followed along.
“Dad why were you smiling like a baboon earlier?”
“Just because you remind me of you mother.”
As I said that I noticed that she got uncomfortable, and something came over me. “You know it's not a shame to smile sweetie.” When I finished saying that she took her headphones out, and put her earbuds in. That gave me the signal to leave her alone. Why is she doing this to herself? We make another turn down the street, and there is a guy crossing the street. With me immediately slamming on the breaks we both jolted against the seat. Mair made the effort to just stare at him as he crossed the street. The poor boy looked both ways before putting his filthy hands back inside his pockets as he walked across the street really sketchy. After I stepped on the gas pedal to go forward again she looks at her phone and I just see her fingers tapping away.
As I turn our last right to go towards our destination; Mair put her phone away in shame. We parked the car, and she got out quickly. I got out of the car as I shut the car door, and followed Mair in. Even though Mair 17, and almost a young adult. She is still Daddy’s little girl, and her mother knew from the very start. Oh does Mair look like her mother; especially since Mair has her looks and attitude.
We check in; pay, and filled out our surveys of the St. Ham Hospital. Even before I filled my survey out a girl, who was wearing white and purple (which is their company colors). Mair and I stood up, and walk over to the door to greet her. As we exchange pleasantries, and handed my survey to this woman in the white and purple lab coat. I went back to sit down on the comfortable brown sofa while my young daughter goes with this woman. Here I am thinking thank god she isn’t with a guy therapist; otherwise I would’ve been in that same room with her. I just don’t trust grown man with my precious daughter. Guess you can say I’m an overprotective father.
I pull out my iphone and started playing Candy Crush on my phone. Inside this silent cold waiting room; the walls are a cold white just like snow. Then I hear the big magnetic door close and I jumped. Going back to my game after adjusting myself from the chair I finally beat level 101. I cheer silently as everyone in the room look at me in disbelief, and then my Mair comes through that magnetic door. Again I jump, and this time I get up from it.
“Nothing that you should be concerned about.”
I walk out with Mair’s arms crossed as she follows me to the car. We both got in slamming the doors behind us simultaneously. Mair put her headphones in her ears, yet again and I drive the long way home. I put on some classical music as it fills the air with aroma. As I drive, and the music playing I start to think one day she will be comfortable enough to tell me. Just then I pull into our two car driveway, and we both got out of the car. We walk towards the house, but the only thing is that Mair is more depressed. She is always like this whenever she comes back from her therapist. I took my shoes off as I walked through the front door. Then I walk towards my couch that is sadly a cafe brown. I fall into it as I relaxed. I closed my eyes and started to dream.
I walk inside a hospital room with my love laying in bed. I slowly walk to her and I grabbed her hand when I sit down. She looks at me in all sadness. “Mike sweetie, whats wrong?”
“Nothing love, you should get some rest.”
“No I don’t believe you. Sweetie tell me.”
“You shouldn’t worry about Mair right now.”
“She is our daughter. I have to worry about her.”
“Do you want to see her? Cause I’ll call her Sadie, and all you have to do is tell me and I’ll call her.” I look at her like I’m willing to do anything to save her from this. Just them something changed, and I see her shake her head.
“Sweetie you know Mair can’t see me like this. It will ruin her. Can you not bring her inside please?”
“But Sadie- she’s your daughter. She has to have a mother figure, and not a one that is dying love.”
“Till death do us apart right Mike? She will always have me as a mother figure. I will just have cancer, and that’s the only thing that is different.” She hands me a locket with a picture of all of us as a family inside of it. “Take this to Mair, and let her wear it. So she can remember me.” All I did was nod at her response. I got up and walked over to put the necklace away when I heard what everyone doesn’t want to hear. The sound of death, and a panic came over me. I ran over to where the emergency button is and I pressed it. As soon as the nurses came in they had to get me out of the room. I pace back and forth repetitively waiting for the revival team to make my wife alive again.
I see a doctor is a white lab coat that reached the floor said to me that my wife is dead I crouched down and cried for what seemed like hours. I went inside the cold hospital room where the corpse of my wife, and the mother of Mair laid. I went to hold her hand and tears fell from my face like a waterfall. I finally got up from my sitting position, and kissed her on the lips. I went to get my belongings before turning around one last time to see her finally at rest. Her eyes closed. I turned around and walked out of that horrid room.
I walked inside the empty car garage getting an uneasy feeling, but I just continued to go to my car. Once I got in it; I cried. I start to drive away suffering from my loss. I drive down the long, and narrow road as the music is blaring through the speakers. All I can hear is the song “Bad Day” by Daniel Powter, and about half way through the song I start to sing it in a low husky voice. Just when the song had ended so was my journey. I pulled into our driveway, and stared outside of the huge house that belonged to a happy wife, father, and daughter. My mind replays that moment over and over again, and all I can think about is is this my fault? I put the car in park, and I just continued sitting there in the driver's seat as I turn off the car. Out of nowhere I jump towards someone knocking on my drivers side window. How is this possible? I tool out the window and I see Mair knocking, and I opened it asking her what she wanted. All she did was to continue to knock, and knock repetitively. It seems like no matter what I say Mair can’t hear me.
I jolt up from the couch, and realised it was the door that was making the sound. I walk over to the door and open it, and behind this cherry wood door is a scrawny boy. No more from what it seems like 18 years old. What is a “young man” doing here this late at night? I looked at my watch to only recognize its 5 in the afternoon. I furrowed my eyebrows and looked at him with full intent.
“Hello. Is Mair here by any chance?”
“Um, yeah, who are you exactly?”
“My name is Sebastian. I’m dating your daughter.”
“Do you know the reason why she is depressed?”
“Are you going to let me in?”
“Are you going to answer my question?”
“She is depressed because of-”
I heard Mair come down out steep wooden stairs, and she nearly jumped out of her own skin. The shock on her face, and her happiness means everything to me. Not right in this moment because she is in trouble. She should’ve told me about this damn Sebastian guy, and you know instead of keeping it a secret. That dirty blonde hair ragged looking boy is not trustworthy of my trust. Well not yet.
“Sebastian?! You here? How? When?”
He looked a little bothered as she ran up, and hugged him. All I could do at that moment is smile on the inside. I gave him a watch you ass stare, and he let her go immediately. Oh do I love the power to scare trashy boys like him. That small smile that was there before grew even bigger inside of me and my innerself jumped up and down for joy.
“You have to tell your dad why you’re sad.”
“Yes he will okay. I love you Mair. Talk to you later.”
Just as he kisses my daughter's head all I could think about is that he can not hurt her. If he does he. Will. Be Terminated. Poor Mair, only if she knew that her mother died. Mair turned around, and all I could think is sadness. Just then I see her face get all red, and with practically steam coming out her head with horns just like an angry bull. Just then she exploded like little kids hitting on a piñata.
“You didn’t tell me you were dating anyone, therefore, I had the right to send him away.”
“It’s not like he was going to rape me or anything.”
“Mair I don’t want you to get hurt that’s all.”
“Well I already am okay?”
“Why are you depressed honey?”
“What do you know about her sweetie?”
Seeing her cry is like having your heart ripped out of your chest. I see her cross her arms all insecure like, and slowly walks over to our café brown sofa. I slowly follow het, and sat next to her as I embrace my arms around my hurting daughter. When our hug was over I start to explain that night.
“Mair, your mother had cancer when you were 14. She didn’t know what to do so I took her to the hospital that night when you were with your grandma,” she starts sobbing again, but this time it was a waterfall I tell myself over and over again be strong Mike, “and when I texted you moments before the cancer took over her body.”
“Dad I have to tell you something, and me being depressed about mom kind of is a cover up.”
“What do you mean Mair sweetie?” When I said that she got up, and ran over to the living room powder room and threw up there. Just then so many possibilities was going through my head. I never knew which one she was going to say when she is coming back. Once she is done with her business in the powder room she comes back over, and hugs me. The those words every father with a teenage daughter never wants to hear.
“By who? What? You can’t be your only 17.”
“Dad what I was telling my therapist was that I was rapped few months back.”
When she tells me this I shake my head over and over again. I;m not proud of her nor am I disappointed. At some point she got rapped, and it’s all my fault. Only if I was more protective over her. Was it that damned boy Sebastian? Or was it someone else? Only she could tell me, and that can only tell within time.
