Bitch with wifi

My name is Sam, and I'm not even going to pretend this blog has any structure or purpose. (20/f/Australia)

[jourjean]

the accuracy 

[witcher-the-last-wish]

[rentfreecat]

I know next to nothing about Witcher but this is still objectively hilarious

[sweet55sstuff]

[the-memedaddy]

meirl

[whitepeopletwitter]

[serenaci]

[fluffygif]

When you got an itchy beard

[teaboot]

God the bit when it opens it’s mouth and it goes from Live Action Hello Kitty to The Unholy Maw Of The Immortal Hellhound in .5 seconds is a moment I am Vibing with, you go, you adorable little bastard

[teaboot]

Reblogging twice because I love these fuckers

[somnolentsuggestions]

i am a simple creature. every day i am sleepy

[penny-anna]

AU where instead of trying to cure her infertility Yennefer just goes around saving random people’s lives and invoking the law of surprise bcos she figures sooner or later it’ll net her a baby. she hasn’t got one yet but she has amassed about 2 dozen dogs so she’s doing pretty well for herself.

[penny-anna]

1) after a while her habit of swooping in at the last minute to save the day gets her a rep as a legit superhero. she’s like ‘no you don’t understand. I Am Not Nice. I’m doing this for very selfish reasons - stop praising me you don’t get it’

2) ‘I’m starting to think that destiny must be a real thing. there’s no other explanation for how many of my surprises are dogs. destiny is real and destiny wants me to have dogs for some reason.’

[problematicfan]

Okay but her doing this beFORE Geralt does it and when she finds out that he only had to invoke the law of surprise ONCE to get a baby she goes absolutely feral on him. Just dead silent, furious, finally starts pulling off her jewelry like, “bard, hold my earrings.”

[penny-anna]

Yennefer: actually can I trade your child surprise for some of my dog surprises

Geralt: um

Yennefer: how many dogs equals one child. how about 10? 10 dogs.

Geralt: I don’t think this is how the law of surprise works

[penny-anna]

Jaskier: Geralt’s child surprise is a princess so I’d say she’s worth at least 20 dogs

Yennefer: how about 15? I can do you 15. 

Geralt: no.

Jaskier: but Geralt…. so many puppies Geralt

[flootzavut]

Jaskier starts invoking the law of surprise on families with dogs because he really really wants the puppies

[alleyesonthehindenburg]

He ends up getting like five children instead and Yennefer is fuming

[penny-anna]

Yenn: how the FUCK did you invoke the law of surprise one (1) time and get five children out of it??

Jaskier: I was confused too,

[hedwig-dordt]

So are they starting a puppies & babies daycare center together now?

[pterribledinosaurdrawings]

Fun activity you can do with a scrap of paper! Make yourself a confuse!

[unhingedbookclub]

henry cavill: emerges, disgusting, from the swamp with black eyes

Me:

[corvidkusnos]

[valtsv]

fictional character: *goes completely apeshit and loses control of their powers after the person they love is threatened*

me:

[valtsv]

fictional character: *can’t bring their powers back down to a safe level after losing control of them and has to be given a cooldown hug by the person they love because they’re the only person who can safely approach them*

me:

[anxietyproblem]

[chaoticautie]

me: *saying "WHAT?" seven times to someone giving me coherent face-to-face verbal directions*

also me: *hears a faint noise and randomly lifts head like a deer* hey did u guys hear that??? wtf how could you not hear it-

[steelcladart]

has this been done yet 

[tsunglasses]

This is by far my favourite moral choice in the entirety of the Witcher series and quite honestly, videogames as a medium.

[loveliesbleedingandbarren]

Me: *does a thing*

Companions: *disapproves*

Me needing %100 approval or it's not good enough: