Chaotic Lawful

[millenianthemums]

i want a shirt that has a QR code on it for some kind of horrible malware so that if anyone ever tries to film me in public their phone will automatically scan the code and be reduced to a functionless brick

[iwasrightaboutthesun]

Modern day Medusa

[starridge]

having thoughts,

[jackhawksmoor]

I hate how this meme format always catches me. No matter what it is about I HAVE to go through it line-by-line and consider each choice like I’m looking at fucking wine selections it’s my kryptonite I CAN’T NOT LOOK DAMMIT

[mlarayoukai-archive]

You show a cat something and they're like sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff ooooh I understand now. Don't care

[redrobin-detective]

After careful consideration and going over multiple options I think the best choice is stay warm and cozy in bed forever.

[amilkyway]

fireflies lighting up a rural Pennsylvania field at dusk

[strawberrygardenkisses]

🍂🍄🍂🍄🍂🍄🍂🍄🍁🍄🍂🍄🍂🍄🍂🍄🍂🍄

May your autumn be cozy, refreshing, and full of love.

🍂🍄🍂🍄🍂🍄🍂🍄🍂🍄🍂🍄🍂🍄🍂🍄🍂🍄

[problempippin]

doctor who van gogh scene but it's showing boromir gondor restored

[taciturn-nerd]

ok why you got me crying so early in the day

[sexhaver]

i think about this a lot

[voxvenati]

[vulqan]

hello @sashayed your gay haunted wedding is doing numbers on tumblr as god or whoever intended

[sashayed]

ghosts loved it btw 😌

[apicturewithasmile]

“I’m much happier at 53 than I was at 23.” (x)

[t-aash]

i love you guillermo del totoro

[night-dark-woods]

[ID: Four gifs of Guillermo del Toro in an interview. He says, “I think the sublime confusion is from 19 to 29. You think you are late for everything, you’re a has-been, nothing is happening, there’s no opportunity for you, the world is closed, everything is a disaster, you wanna die. And then you’re 30.” /end ID]

[freedom-and-books]

He once gave a class in Guadalajara and said “Ustedes los jóvenes están en la edad exacta de la desesperación. Yo nunca me sentí más acabado y viejo que a los veintitantos. Decía ‘ya me pasó la vida y no hice nada’. Pero estoy aquí para decirles que no: tienen un chingo de tiempo”

Which translates to “You young people are in the exact age of desperation. I never felt more done and old than in my twenties. I’d say ‘life has passed me by and i did nothing’. But i’m here to tell you that’s not true: you have a lot of fucking time”

[cafffine]

bro just add some green onion to that rice dish you’ll be ok. bro? you don’t have any green onion? oh don’t worry bro I saved the butts of my green onions and left them in a cup of water in my sunny kitchen window for a week, and now they are tall and luscious again because growth in inevitable. Here, you can have them bro. I love you.

[threebigolsausages-deactivated2]

me giving my pet chihuahua two kisses: chimuahmuah

[threebigolsausages-deactivated2]

sorry that it didnt make you chihaha

[vivi266-archive-deactivated2024]

i'm perfectly fine except for the problems

[ejacutastic]

Ravioli Of Lying To God

[theclockworkjudas]

God: What are you eating?

Cistercian Monk: *chews faster*

[mistergandalf-deactivated201601]

one of my favorite lotr facts is that gondorians speak sindarin as a first language and yet when faramir was talking to frodo and sam about cirith ungol he was like “we don’t know what’s in there.” like faramir. cirith ungol is sindarin for “pass of the spider.” do the math

[mistergandalf-deactivated201601]

some of my favorite tags on this post

[theelvenkingshalls]

Don’t forget that Frodo also speaks Sindarin, which makes this even worse.

Faramir: Hey, don’t go up the Spider Stairs.

Frodo: Why? What’s up the Spider Stairs?

Faramir: We don’t know, Frodo. We just don’t know.

[jumpingjacktrash]

to be fair, you’d assume the name means “there’s a lot of spiders here,” not, “there is one spider the size of a draft horse here.” so you go up expecting to have to shoo a lot of skeeter eaters out of your tent, and instead you have to figure out how to rope and shoe godzillarantula.

[ceescedasticity]

Hmmm…

They do live in a world where godzillarantulas feature prominently in mythology and history (Ungoliant plunged the world into darkness, scared the crap out of Sauron’s old boss, etc) and existed within the last century in Mirkwood. Assuming they ever talk to anyone who’s been to Mirkwood. They… probably know they were giant spiders in Mirkwood pretty recently? It’s hard to figure out how much anyone in Middle-earth has been talking to anyone else when we didn’t actually see it.

On the other hand – what if it’s the giant evil spiders’ prominence in history/mythology that’s causing trouble? What if lots of evil/nasty things/places get called “spider” just to indicate how nasty and evil they are, rather than any association with literal spiders, and it’s just… overloaded? Maybe the bad part of town in Minas Tirith is the Spider District. Maybe every tavern trying to be edgy calls itself the Spiderweb.

Actually spider/Ungoliant references could be really appealing to Gondorians trying to be edgy. They’re dark and evil! Plunged the world into darkness! But they AREN’T involved in the war they’re actually fighting, they aren’t directly associated with Sauron at all, so getting too interested in them would be creepy without being potentially treasonous. Because no one’s ACTUALLY going to worship those dangerous but not epic spiders up in Mirkwood, and no one’s heard anything from any proper spawn of Ungoliant in ages and ages.

In fact, spider/Ungoliant references might be appealing to ORCS trying to express that something is nasty and creepy! Nobody likes Ungoliant.

Maybe Faramir’s been to fourteen different Spider Caves across Ithilien, and half of them he didn’t even see regular spiders in, they’re just dark and damp and may have had orcs at some point, or something, and at some point in history someone got spooked. So you know, it’s POSSIBLE Spider Pass has something to do with spiders? But really it just means people don’t like it.

(The problem with this theory is we never actually SAW anyone overusing spider references. But it’s plausible they would!)

[wordswithkittywitch]

“The average spider on Middle Earth is the size of a dinner plate” is a statistical error. The average spider on Middle Earth is smaller than a coin. Cirith Ungol (lit: Spiders Gorge), which contains a spider larger than a horse, is an outlier adn should not have been counted.

[iwilltrytobereasonable]

OH MY GOD

[weaver-z]

As Bed Bath and Above, so Bed Bath and Below

[jori-like-jormungandr]

<|:) wizard

<\:) the cooler wizard

[thats-howthelightgets-in]

Just because your hat is tilted aside jauntily does not prove your superiority. My wizard hat is set neatly atop my head so that it is secure against strong breezes and someone condescendingly flicking the brim

[azzandra]

I can tell that people condescendingly flicking your brim is a recurring issue for you.