not good news

Like literally, not good news. I'm a blatant mysandrist, witch, and super anti-christian. Chances are, you're gonna hate me.  But that's okay. Hate mail will be ignored, though. You're probably gonna want me to stop following you once you've realized my opinions and views. That isn't going to happen, sorry.

[chickentea-blog]

[chickentea-blog]

Curse to really fuck someone up.

Okay

Okay okay okay

So what you do is

STEP 1

Write their name and a short summary of what they did to you on a piece of paper like, two-three inches wide and as long as the base of your palm to the tip of your middle finger, and on the back draw doodles of anything you want.

Sigils, further detailing of the parameters of the curse, tiny cartoon dicks, whatever.

STEP 2

Then you get, like, fucking biodegradable cloth. Or corn husks. Whatever. You double it up and cut it so it looks like a gingerbread man, put the paper in-between the two pieces of gingerbread man shaped cloths, sew it up a bit, and fill it with either 

rice (if you want it to be temporary but gross and something they likely won’t forget) or

rocks (if you want it to be permanent and make them suffer for the rest of their life)

and then finish sewing it up.

STEP 3

Is there a river near you? throw it in there, the more stagnant and filthy the water is the better.

Oceans work too, but you may need to use some additional weight to make it fight the currents and land on the bottom instead of get pushed back to shore. (make ur poppet out of fucken seaweed tho)

Or throw it down a sewer system or gutter.

If you’re in a desert just fucking bury it in an area prone to flash floods.

STEP 4

Watch as your enemy slowly traps themselves in a situation they cannot escape or recover from, losing everything they have worked so hard to gain, including the respect of their family and friends, and as their own frustration with the situation leads them to become estranged from their significant other, leading them further into a spiraling depression from which there is no escape, they will slowly begin to realize that they deserve this.

They have always deserved this.

Ã̃̏n̪̖̗͑̅ͬ̚d͖̼͇̪̥̣ͥ̄ͯ ̣̳ͥ̚ḁ̯̅̃̽̀s̥̞̞̮̓ ͍̑t͍̳̮̹̞̬̅̂h͓̻̦̰̠͙͗̾ͩe͈̝͖̼̩͙͛y͙̘͊ ̖̣͈͎͙̠h͙̯͕̝͓̭̤a̩͔̪ͨv͉͈̙̙̔́͒̃̅́ͅè̯̞͕̼͔͕̦͑̑ ̜̜̪̜̯͕̩a͓͎͕̮̫ͩ̓͂l̗ͨ̈́ͯ̑ͯ̏̓w͈̮̃ǎ̖̺̮̬̲͕͚ͨ̍ͬ̏̎y͚̤̥̎ͨ̂̀͛̚ͅs̲͉̯̖̘̩ͬ͂̄̈͆̃̆ ̻́ͫ̏̂d͉̩ͨ̍̿e̳̥ͤͥͯ̏̾s͍͇͈ͧ̍͂e͕̮̣̩r̫̘͉̾̒̔̀̂ͮv̻̱̫͚̥̠̈́̎ͭ̌ḙ̗̙͕̙͈̌d̞̊͒̂ͥ͊̋͋ ̻̤̫̭͔͕̒́ṯ̩̮̱̤̀ͩ̓̅ͯ̚ͅͅh̲̞̠̘͓̥̜ͣ̽i͇̠̪̜͓ͮͨ̒ͦ͌̈ͅs͇̬̗̄̂̽̎͑͛,͇͎̝ͩͮͩ ̳͎̳̮͒̓ͮ̑͋ͬ̽ṣ͎̩̣͕̘́̊o̤̙̺̗̠ͬ̽́̓ͬ͗̇ ̱̣͙̝̩͈̆͒̉ͬs̫͛̏ͬ̂̉ḧ̫̘͉̭́̇̎̄ͩo̱̱̯u̯̙͔ͅĺ̖͆͐̆ḍ̎̈́ͮ̂̃͊ ̫̫̭͕ͦ̐̋̅t̥̼̮h͓̱͑̋e͇̹̝͉ͯ͋̃̇̚ͅͅy͙͍̠̩̫̹͗̄ͩ ͎͚͂̽͒ͣͅa͔̠̠̼̋͗̋c̣̃̌̈͂̉̆̽c͙̪ͧ̃͐̒͒e̽͊p̦̹ͣͣ͊t̼̺̹͚͓̓̀́ͪ͒ ̘̞͖̹̘̆̋t̳͕̗̞͔͚̯͆ͭͭh̠̬ͨ͗̎ͭͨͮͅe͇̩͚̗͍͉͑͊̈͐ͧͩͅ ͙̗̟̙̹͉͖ͭh̝̭̳̫͓͕͙̍̚o̼͈̭r͓̦̙̜̻͛̃̑ͅṙ͔̙͔͕̽̃oͮr̤ͣ͒͑s̟̘̞̠ ̞͇͇͎̺̾ͥ̐͑̚t̬̙̾͑ͩ̍ͪȟ̥̲̣̮̰̻͍͌̎aͪ͗t̆ ̓ͫ͋ͦ͑ͥ̅a͈͔̺̞̩͒w͚̟̼ͦa̟̾͋́͂̚ȉ̖͐̑̎ͮ̍t̗͕̠͒͆ ̏̃̊̍̏t̾̔͌ͮh̭̝̦ͧͪ̉ͅẽ̟̯̱͓͇m̠ͣ̓̍ͦ ̲̲͓͇ͭ̂i̺̜̮͈̼̘͍n̠ͪ͋͊͂͒̾ ̩̱̖͙̩͆̅t̍ͭ͛h̫̳̳ẹ̝̲͓͈͔́́͊̐́ͪ̈́ͅ ̫̘͖͙ͫ̎f̥͈̣̯̩̬̎ͅu̦̼t̟̖̄̊́̓̓ȕ̗̫ͅr̖̭̬̘̲̞͕͛ẽ̫.̻̣̖̭̘̭̦͛ͧ͊͐

Yeah so there’s my curse bro enjoy.

[chickentea-blog]

A method to Cleanse and Ward after unsavory people visit your house

Personally, I wait 15 minutes to ensure they haven’t forgotten anything (it’s a long, painful wait, I know. Just bear with it!) and then get straight to work!

First off;

If they ate or drank at your house:

DO NOT save any leftovers from that meal, as it is now connected to them. Use it instead in the compost heap to help further along your garden.

Rinse down the dishes they used with vinegar first, spritz with sage-infused water, then proceed to washing the dishes normally.

And now if they did not eat or drink at your house

Open all doors and windows to air out the house.

Light some incense (honestly any will do at this point your just trying to make sure their scent doesn’t linger)

The couch or chair they were sitting on needs to be thoroughly vacuumed.

After vacuuming the couch or chair, cast a consecrated circle around the object and banish their energy from it.

Lightly mist with moonwater and place energized crystals in a spiral in said area.

Dust the House.

Sweep the floors and collect any trash, immediately taking it out.

Wash down all tabletops and counter surfaces with vinegar.

Wash the floors and walls with a mix of lavender/sage/moonwater.

Vacuum the carpets and rugs.

Smudge.

Squeeze out some garlic juice from 3 cloves of garlic and rub into ground outside of door (3 cloves per door).

Mix lemon juice with a drop of peppermint oil and use it to draw a line on the door frame, both sides; make sure you left no line breaks!

Rub a touch of dogwood oil on the outside doorknob.

Recharge your witch balls!

Air out your dreamcatchers if you have any!

If they sat down on your bed

Ohhhhhh boy oh boy oh boy. Guess who’s about to wash their sheets?

Surprise it’s you!

Wash your sheets.

Wash your comforter.

Wash the pillowcases.

Wash the pillows.

Wash the mattress pad.

Vacuum the mattress.

Mist lightly with moonwater.

Place energized crystals where they sat in a spiral.

Optional; write their name on an egg, take it outside, and crush it beneath your heel.

Can be a curse or just an emotional outlet, either way; it feels pretty good.

“But what if I don’t have all those incenses and oils and moonwater???”

Silly, just air out your house and clean it top to bottom using regular cleaning supplies!

If it helps, you can also say the following;

“Your body left my house,  Now, your spirits can too. And by ‘can’ I mean ‘will’, It’s time for all of you to leave.

You’ve worn out your welcome, When you never had any at all, Out the door with you lot, Away you go, away!

May you never return here! May you never come back! I banish you from this threshold! Now get the fuck outta my house.”

[c0smic-grimoire-deactivated2019]

My only issue with this is the smudging part. 

smudging is a part of the Native American’s traditions and we are not very happy about people taking things from our traditions. Trust me, I grew up around angry Native American’s whenever anything was taken from our traditions.

Please do not smudge unless you are a part of a Native American tribe that does.

[chickentea-blog]

1) I’m Choctaw

2) Fuck you, if someone wants to smudge they can. 

I don’t give a fuck what their heritage is, borrowing a method from a different culture to achieve a desired result isn’t appropriation. What, are you gonna tell mathematicians to stop using the fucking number system because it was originally invented by a Muslim named Al-Khwarizmi? Or that we all better stop using photography, because it’s earliest known date of use if from China? 

I’m sorry you have a hate-boner for something you have no control over, but what the fuck are you on going after people for smudging of all things? If they were taking our dances and claiming it was originally Wiccan anyways, or bastardizing our mythology to fit with their beliefs and claiming it for their own, then yeah I’d be pretty fucking pissed.

Kids.

Ugh.

[chickentea-blog]

seriously tho all christians just need to stop

take this as stop being christian or stop breathing i don’t care

just make them all go away

[chickentea-blog]

So apparently if someone is commencing a ceremony in an attempt to replicate the ones of old, to older gods who deserve nothing less than your respect, some people cut themselves and bleed on the altar and call that the sacrifice?

No.

That’s not what a sacrifice is at all.

A sacrifice is something you’ll miss. Something of great value. It’d be more appropriate if you surgically removed a lung or a kidney or someshit and burned that at the altar.

So spilling a little blood on an altar and calling it a sacrifice? Noooooooo no no no. That’s an offering. You make more blood, your body won’t miss it at all.

So if your intention is to spill blood for it, unless you’re sacrificing a prized calf, lamb, or other livestock animal that you raised, or murdering another human (please don’t) it doesn’t count.

Learn a craft. Like knitting or drawing or someshit.

Spend time to master this craft. Constantly make projects. So you know the one that you’re most proud of? The one you love to show off? The one you put so much effort into that your fingers bled and you lost sleep over it? The one that took you years to make?

Burn it.

That’s your sacrifice.

Is it what the gods are used to? Nope. Will they appreciate it because you’re not half-assing it and giving them your best? Yup.

Just

Ya know

Little PSA.

[mistyawe]

A close look to my Grimoire <3 I felt like sharing once again.

[cunningcelt]

Oh my word!! That’s stunning!

[sugarless-gum]

Mr. Ambrose is my absolute favorite.

BONUS(ES):

and

[snakingriver]

[deactivated-blog]

Sex Magic: How to Cast Spells with Your Orgasms | Broadly

Since time immemorial, witches have been harnessing their sexual energy to do magic. We spoke to some modern-day practitioners about their craft.

Just finished this article and had to share! Its a great take on sex magic and so refreshing, definitely something to check out! ;)

[thecreatinewitch]

Ahhhhhhh yesssss I’ve been doing this ever since I started having sex. A decent article about witchcraft from Vice!? Whaaaaa????

[quotablebookquotes]

It’s vital to remember who you really are. It’s very important. It isn’t a good idea to rely on other people or things to do it for you, you see. They always get it wrong.

Terry Pratchett - Sourcery (Discworld #5) (Rincewind #3)

[deactivated-blog]

This question might be a bit dark to ask, but here goes. Do you know of any spells that involve blood magic? If not, do you know any blogs that do? I was also wondering what you think about this -- do you think that using self injury in a spell could make it more potent? Thank you.

DISCLAIMER/TRIGGER WARNING: Self Injury/Blood: Obviously this post and ALL of the links will contain a blood mention and possibly pictures. You have been warned.

Thats not too dark to ask! There are lots of spells that include blood, although do not self injure yourself for the blood in a spell. Its not going to be more powerful then the blood used in pricking your finger with a lancet, which is going to be the safest way to get blood to use in blood magic if you are using your own blood. You can also use blood from the market; just ask your butcher to save you a small amount, they likely will! If you think it sounds weird to just ask your butcher for blood: its not. There are lots of things you can cook with blood, so you can just say you are experimenting in the kitchen with it. Cooking with blood comes from many different cultures so its not weird at all. Anyway…

If you are going to practice blood magic do it safely, and use a clean lancet each time you do it. You can get lancets from your local drugstore, or order them online from amazon. Again, do not self injure yourself for blood to use in blood magic. Its not needed. Also important to note, when you self injure, the intent is different then if you are using a lancet with intent for the spell, and that may change the energies of the spells you are casting and the overall outcome of the spell. Keep that in mind.

Anyway, on to spells & other info!! (These aren’t in any particular order, sorry)

Information

Blood Magic 101

B is for Blood

What Is Blood Magic, Where Do I Start?

Ethics & Safety in Blood Craft

Blood Magic vs Self Injury

How To Use Blood Magic Safely

Blood Magic - Intermediate Stuff

PSA to Blood Witches

Blood Magic and Paradigms

Witchcraft for Beginners: What you should know about Blood Magic

Spells & Stuff

Hurricane Curse

Hellfire Curse

Grief Powder

Spell to Call Blood to Blood

Medieval Witch Ward

Necromantic Scrying: Stagnant Water

Bottle Spell for Healing Childhood Trauma

Peace of Mind Spell

Stay the F* out Spell

Blood Magic Protection Jar

Come To Me

Potent Protective Witch Bottle

My Blood Is Armour

Sea Witch’s Bottle

Spirit Door Bar

Blood & Dirt Binding Spell

I know I missed a bunch, but that should be enough to get you started!

Please be careful in your craft, if you need assistance in stopping self injury, please contact S.A.F.E Alternatives at 1–800–366–8288

[femalesruletheworld]

Angela Merkel runs the biggest economy in Europe and Sheryl Sandberg is chief operating officer of the world’s most successful social networking site — is it any wonder that men feel threatened? Perhaps that explains why they have reacted so furiously to claims in a new book that women are superior to men and about to outstrip them.

It’s all over, boys: the end of male supremacy

link - http://www.thetimes.co.uk/tto/life/article4395417.ece

[femalesruletheworld]

http://evmeded.org/video/are-women-superior-to-men-a-panel-discussion-on-evolution-and-sex-differences/

[chickentea-blog]

why are people reblogging my stuff i’m a horrible cunt of a human being

this is so weird usually tumblr is all about pulling receipts on horrible shit people have said on here and i don’t even try to hide mine

[thelaughing-deactivated20250616]

witch aesthetics → k i t c h e n w i t c h

So are you to my thoughts as food to life, Or as sweet-season’d showers are to the ground; And for the peace of you I hold such strife As ‘twixt a miser and his wealth is found;

― William Shakespeare

[chickentea-blog]

Real talk

All this joking about burning so much incense that you set off your smoke alarms or get headaches or even pass out is not a healthy thing.

Like

All of these are actually really bad for you?

How the fuck do you expect to accurately cast a spell if your body isn’t at peak performance? Which, honestly, is hard enough without you poisoning yourself.

There are studies that show that lighting that much incense in a poorly ventilated room can cause polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons (PAHs), which are a carcinogen. That means a chemical that has the capacity to cause cancer.

There are a lot of studies, with a few differing results as a byproduct of the personal opinion of the writers, but the main underlying find was that burning enough of them is like smoking a cigarette, but with different effects as a result of not taking them in the same way.

Still enough to fuck you up.

So

For the love of fuck

Ventilate your goddamn work area, only light one or two sticks at a time, and do not stick your nose in the smoke stream and inhale.

It makes you feel lightheaded and fuzzy because it’s reducing the amount of oxygen to your brain, not because of magic, you stupid fuckwits.

And hey, guess what? Because you’re not buying incense in the dumpster load to replace the alarming rate at which you use them, you save money and resources!

Because getting the materials to make them? Pollution. Powering the factory to make them? Pollution. Forcing the essential slave labor in sweatshops to make them if they are not made in a factory? Inhumane. The smoke they give off? Pollution.

Know what else is in those store-bought incense sticks? A shit ton more resin than you would ever need. That’s part of the carcinogens.

Make your own, if you absolutely must replace the oxygen in your lungs with pretty smelling smoke.

Off the top of google; link, link, link

[chickentea-blog]

A method to Cleanse and Ward after unsavory people visit your house

Personally, I wait 15 minutes to ensure they haven’t forgotten anything (it’s a long, painful wait, I know. Just bear with it!) and then get straight to work!

First off;

If they ate or drank at your house:

DO NOT save any leftovers from that meal, as it is now connected to them. Use it instead in the compost heap to help further along your garden.

Rinse down the dishes they used with vinegar first, spritz with sage-infused water, then proceed to washing the dishes normally.

And now if they did not eat or drink at your house

Open all doors and windows to air out the house.

Light some incense (honestly any will do at this point your just trying to make sure their scent doesn’t linger)

The couch or chair they were sitting on needs to be thoroughly vacuumed.

After vacuuming the couch or chair, cast a consecrated circle around the object and banish their energy from it.

Lightly mist with moonwater and place energized crystals in a spiral in said area.

Dust the House.

Sweep the floors and collect any trash, immediately taking it out.

Wash down all tabletops and counter surfaces with vinegar.

Wash the floors and walls with a mix of lavender/sage/moonwater.

Vacuum the carpets and rugs.

Smudge.

Squeeze out some garlic juice from 3 cloves of garlic and rub into ground outside of door (3 cloves per door).

Mix lemon juice with a drop of peppermint oil and use it to draw a line on the door frame, both sides; make sure you left no line breaks!

Rub a touch of dogwood oil on the outside doorknob.

Recharge your witch balls!

Air out your dreamcatchers if you have any!

If they sat down on your bed

Ohhhhhh boy oh boy oh boy. Guess who’s about to wash their sheets?

Surprise it’s you!

Wash your sheets.

Wash your comforter.

Wash the pillowcases.

Wash the pillows.

Wash the mattress pad.

Vacuum the mattress.

Mist lightly with moonwater.

Place energized crystals where they sat in a spiral.

Optional; write their name on an egg, take it outside, and crush it beneath your heel.

Can be a curse or just an emotional outlet, either way; it feels pretty good.

“But what if I don’t have all those incenses and oils and moonwater???”

Silly, just air out your house and clean it top to bottom using regular cleaning supplies!

If it helps, you can also say the following;

“Your body left my house,  Now, your spirits can too. And by ‘can’ I mean ‘will’, It’s time for all of you to leave.

You’ve worn out your welcome, When you never had any at all, Out the door with you lot, Away you go, away!

May you never return here! May you never come back! I banish you from this threshold! Now get the fuck outta my house.”