.✦ ݁˖ space viking.

[chmswcrth]

CHRIS HEMSWORTH ( he/him, cis man ) is a FORTY TWO year old ACTOR. while he was born in MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA, chris now resides between BYRON BAY, AUSTRALIA & LOS ANGELES, CA. chris is currently SINGLE and identifies as HETEROSEXUAL. chris also shares THREE KIDS with ELSA PATAKY and is expecting a child with ELIZABETH OLSEN.

unless stated otherwise, all of the gifs and graphics used on this blog are mine. for anything that is not mine: at the time of posting, content creators rules allow their media to be used. if that is the case, all credit goes to the respectable owners/creators. if something that isn’t my content needs to be credited specifically or taken down, please message me politely and i will do so. please do not use my gifs/graphics without permission. everything seen on this blog is purely fictional & not affiliated with chris in anyway

PLATONIC CONNECTIONS  (  positive  ).

best friends : chris evans

close friends : sebastian stan

ride or die 

childhood friends

neighbor

blind date turned good friend

online friend

drinking buddies

partners in crime

co-workers

found family : cailee spaeny

sibling like friends : cate blanchett

mentor / mentee : paul anthony kelly

PLATONIC CONNECTIONS  (  negative  ).

ex-friends : anne hathaway

enemies

neighbor enemies

friends turned lovers turned exes to friends on bad terms

frenemies

love / hate 

dislike for one another

competitive

co-worker : anya taylor-joy

ROMANTIC CONNECTIONS  (  positive  ).

endgame

exes on good terms

blind date

tinder date

friends with benefits 

friends turned lovers

crush

high school sweethearts

falling in love

positive slow burn

best friends to lovers

ex-spouse

ROMANTIC CONNECTIONS  (  negative  ).

exes on bad terms

blind date gone wrong

cheating lovers

friends with benefits with hidden feelings

enemies to lovers

unrequited crush 

skinny love

high school sweethearts that ended poorly

negative slow burn

RANDOM CONNECTIONS  (  positive  or  negative  ).

pet parents 

parent friends

book club

matchmaker

party friends

drug dealer

gym buddy

roommates

in laws

siblings

[paulakellyfms]

Ahh shit, I can only imagine what the must feel like. When my neck is out of it and I have to drive? I absolutely dread it. The weight of awesomeness? I love that answer. Such a positive one. Typically? Yes I roll out of bed and groan while doing so.

[chmswcrth]

don't worry, my dude, you'll experience it soon enough. you really don't realise just how much you use your neck until it's not working properly and you have to do daily tasks. you were supposed to agree with me but i'll take it. it's the only way to get out of bed, at least that's what i say to make myself feel better. but how have you been doing, bud?

[baileysjonathan]

it really is, i can agree on that one. i get those a lot, got one randomly in my upper leg the other day and wasn't sure why or how, and just had to tough through it. they don't and we suffer out of our love for them, haha. i always say if the pets pick a spot, it's theirs, you don't move them, they move when ready. he's a cockapoo and his name is benson. it's crazy resting makes it all worse, you'd think not but we're proven wrong time and time again. i hear a good bath helps and with like i believe it was bath salts ? maybe something to consider. i might soon myself.

[chmswcrth]

the ones that just come out of nowhere always end up hurting more as well. no matter how much i would complain about them taking over the bed, i never kicked them out or moved them. because they always know exactly how to look at you to make you feel bad. cockapoos are really cute dogs, i had a goldendoodle when i was with my ex, but i allowed elsa to take her during the divorce. benson is a solid name. ice baths are actually really good to stop your muscles from hurting. but a hot bath with bath salts sounds a lot more appealing. but if you do it, you have to go all out with candles and a glass of wine.

[chmswcrth]

sooooo ... i heard you were recently brought onto the same project as me. i figured i would reach out before we even start working on it, just to break the ice and make it less awkward. but how have you been? @anne-hathway

[lizzieolsenfms]

We have a few more days, technically, and being prepared brings my stress levels ways down. Which given everything going on, and my doctor saying to keep stress levels down. You know geriatric pregnancy and all. Ugh! Hate that word. True, I'm not, I have someone who is sweet enough to carry them for me. Alright, bump out for the vacation it's decided. Plus I'm not ashamed of my body, like you said I'm growing a whole human baby. That's kind of badass if you ask me. Over - over ten pounds. Okay, wow. Maybe we should talk to the doctor about a c-section after all. My ribs are not kickable, baby just thinks my ribs and bladder are actual play toys. Fair, okay, then we're good. You can carry me and that'll save us a lot of issues. I will probably be bringing my e-reader. Why? Anything you want me to grab for you?

[chmswcrth]

using the term geriatric for a pregnancy at your age is insane. i was offended on your behalf when the doctor said that. but then there is no way to word it where it sounds okay. when you find that person, to carry everything, you have to let me know what they're like. i hope they carry everything. bump out, chest out. i meant my chest, not your chest. as much as i like looking at it, i don't think it's appropriate on a public beach. i'm just kidding, i was a big baby but not ten pounds big. i'm sure our little girl will be petite and easy to push out. i guess it probably gets a little bored in there, there isn't much for her to play with. so unfortunately your organs are keeping her entertained for the next few months. wait until you're further along and you can see her foot protruding out. i was just asking ... mainly because at least i know you're entertained while i go and play in the water.

[ppscal]

Baby, don't even. My body is as fragile as glass these days, I have a 10 year old back injury that still causes me problems and some days it takes me a good 15 minutes just to get out bed because I'm in so much pain. Dakota Johnson sent me to my death by making me go for Gladiator, and I got so many injuries that being still for too long starts becoming risky. Oh you've got all this to look forward to pal. Mentally, I'm still a spring chicken. I will keep doing stunts until something serious happens I think, and I'm not quite sure what I'm considering to be 'serious' because I've ruptured my spine on a movie set.

[chmswcrth]

i don't believe that, not for someone as young and spritely as you are. at least you can blame the injury and not just getting older. i unfortunately don't get that excuse. why does not moving sometimes makes thing so much worse? i can be fine with filming intense scenes all day, but the second i sit down? i'm out for the rest of the day. doing gladiator must have been worth it, though. great, i can't wait for it. that's all that matters, you're only as old as you feel, as the saying goes. we're all mentally immature. if tom cruise can do it, so can we. yeah, nah i'd say that's pretty serious mate.

[jchastainfm]

oh, you were about to smash my heart into a million pieces! that was right up until you said that very obvious lie, but thank you. it should be a myth! instead i am haunted with it! we really do so much for them, plus with the addition of my bonus kids, the pressure is up there. you pretend? such a parent move! they are amazing, ready for summer and trying to figure all that out. how are yours?

[chmswcrth]

me? lie? i don't think i've ever told a lie to you, and i'm not about to start now. luckily my kids still think i'm cool, or at least that's what they tell me. but they definitely side eye me when i try too hard. i highly recommend it, when you just need a break and a sit down. just don't use it too much, otherwise they start getting annoyed. trying to keep kids entertained during summer is rough. mine are great, same old really. we might take a trip back to australia soon, so that will keep them entertained when summer break starts.

[pidgeonsarah]

i guess that is true! it was all in one sitting, otherwise i would have backed out. so i suffered through it! i did end up taking a nap in the chair. a quick work out with the foils in? talk about dedication! that is true, only so many hours in the day. some of it is? i didn't know! did you have some say when he went short? take it! i'm glad i wasn't, but who knows what i'll have to do for my next film!

[chmswcrth]

now that is dedication. i would have backed out just at the thought of it being all in one. how did you not get bored? because i wouldn't be able to leave, i'll suddenly want to do all these different things that i can't. i'm always more than happy to sit for hours until i'm forced to do it. yeah i did. i was spending two hours getting a wig fitted after i decided to cut my hair. so i advocated for a change and they allowed it. would you ever go a different colour?

[cate-eblanchett]

I know, I know. I always get mistaken for Nicole and Naomi Watts... you’re right, maybe it’s the accent and the blonde hair. But you can’t do that because I’m your favorite Aussie. Don’t forget that! Okay, I’ll judge your looks the next time I see you, hopefully soon. And excuse me, sir, I can steal your chips if I want to. You’re lucky I’m not eating carbs these days. Nice! So your location has been L.A. lately? Good. I’m in London, as usual. London feels like home to me now, and I love the countryside there — you know, my farm, my animals, and my multiple children. speaking of children... i talked recently to certain adorable lady who plays my favorite character in marvel, and she gave some news. is there anything you want to share with the class Christopher?

[chmswcrth]

you and me both. i'm starting to get tired of signing autographs on their behalf. i keep telling them, just because i'm blonde and australian doesn't mean i'm them. but they don't listen. sounds like you're threatening me into saying you're my favourite. what's in it for me? just buy your own bag, that way we both don't have to share and we can eat as much as we want. you're only hindering yourself if you steal mine. pretty much, yeah. london is a great place, how is the farm doing? she told you first? damn now i look like the bad friend, i wasn't sure if we were announcing it to people yet. especially since it's not exactly the most ideal situation to have a child in. but yes, me and lizzie are having a baby. well, she's having the baby, i'm just doing everything in my power to not be in her bad books.

[caileespaenyfm]

i might be...kidnapping your child in the near future. i guess not really kidnapping since i'm bringing it up. india texted me, which by the way, jumpscare with that one! i didn't even realize she had a phone, but she's asking if she can visit me on set? i also promised her that we'd go for mani pedi's and you can't make me look like a liar. @chmswcrth

[chmswcrth]

i'm not exactly an expert in kidnapping, but i'm pretty sure that you're not supposed to pre-warn somebody of said kidnapping. but thank you for the heads up, i'll make sure she's packed and ready to go. she has a really old phone that she's only supposed to use in an emergency. i did add your number to the phone, just in case. i guess now you're going to constantly hear from her. if you're okay with it and if the studio is okay with it, she can come visit you for the day. i'll pay for both mani pedi's as a thank you.

[olandriaaa]

alright, that's probably true. neither that or a hangover will keep me down for too long. i ain't even mad at it, definitely not something i thought much about before. but i'm not against paying good money for a good pillow. i just got a new home and will be looking into that while getting it all together and decorated. so thanks for that reminder. apologies, that was very gen z of me... but swear it's a real thing! there's research about it. basically ya know how everybody's always looking down at our phones and other screens - tablets, laptops, whatever. when people are in that sort of slumped forward position with the head looking down for a prolonged amount of time, it can create a little bit of a hump in the neck. and then that's where a lot of extra strain and tension get held. that can be another reason for the sore and stiff neck pain.

[chmswcrth]

you know, when they used to tell me that it takes longer to recover from a hangover the older you get? i used to think it was a lie, but turns out it's unfortunately true. but then again i'm australian, drinking is in my blood. it's the same with a decent mattress. i'm now the person laying on every bed in the store until i find the perfect one. i even now make sure to replace it every few years. otherwise my body will cause hell. getting a new place is always the best excuse to buy all knew stuff. i don't even know what i am. ohhhh, okay now tech neck makes a lot of sense. luckily i don't really spend a lot of time online or on devices. only when i have to work or to post something. but now you're going to make me very conscious on my potential hump. this is probably how humans will start to evolve again.

[evansrchris]

God, I know. We really we unstoppable back in the day. We were also ridiculous together. Remember that press tour we did together and just acted like to two idiots the whole time? Marvel never paired us back up for press again. A real tragedy haha nope, I don’t. I always say you’re the most handsome and beautiful of us all haha absolutely, come on through! We can take them the Boston aquarium or something! Are you in America a lot these days? What’s got you stationed down here? I’ve been great! I loved laying low and just getting ready for marvel stuff again. Feels weird going back to it all, I won’t lie.

[chmswcrth]

it did not take them long to separate us in those interviews. i mean i get it, we did mess around more than actually engage in the interviews. are you doing press for doomsday? maybe we can try and redeem ourselves and get put together again. i don't know if i believe you, or it could just be because i want to hear you say it over and over again. i'm sure they will love the aquarium, we could try and do a bunch of stuff over a weekend. unfortunately i am, yes. well at first it was because elsa moved back here and i hated being away from the kids. but then i kinda got someone pregnant so that's also keeping me here. the reception of your return was crazy. it almost makes me wonder whether i should retire, only to return so i can get the same attention.

[trecoolfms]

TWENTY FIVE? God bless you for your generosity during this difficult time. You're officially my favorite person alive for at least the next six business days. And honestly I think you’re onto something there. I think the second you stop moving after a certain age your body just starts freestyling. Like it gets bored. You fall asleep peacefully and your spine's like "you know what would be hilarious?" Meanwhile your brain's off somewhere fighting demons in a haunted cathedral with a chainsaw and no shirt on while the rest of your body's back home twisting itself into a pretzel. It really is rude though. We used to be able to sleep on floors, in cars, upside down on couches with one shoe on and wake up ready to conquer the world.

[chmswcrth]

anytime man, and don't worry i've already started the rumour online that you're fresh in your twenties. next stop is to change your wiki. only six days? jeez i'm going to have to up my compliments. but at the same time if that's all it takes to get six days then i'm on a roll. this is what they mean when they say you are your own worse enemy. they don't mean mentally but physically. your body turns on you and plays vicious pranks. what kind of dreams are you having? at least i hope that's a dream and not a fond memory to put you to sleep. the amount of times i've woken up in a random house after a party and felt completely fine. now if the mattress is slightly too soft or firm i'm fucked for the week.

[joshjaxfame]

Probably. I think it would help with the impending mid-life crisis that's ahead of me. You're still a few years younger than me, so maybe you have that advantage as well. It's pretty fun, and if you haven't tried it out, then you should soon! It's pretty easy. Think of it as like ping pong, but on a tennis court.

[chmswcrth]

are you planning anything nice for your midlife crisis? have you picked out the motorcycle yet? not by much, it barely makes a difference. dare i say we're more or less the same age. how competitive are you? because if you need a challenge, i'd be happy to play against you. how hard can it be? i can't be trusted with ping pong. i end up hitting it so hard that it practically travels across the room.

[baileysjonathan]

i swear, that's such a mood. i'll sleep one way, wake another and have aches and pains for days wondering how i got them half the time. might not help my dog will sleep with me sometimes and doesn't always make sleeping a fur child the easiest, haha. i noticed something i can't do as much the older i get is actually sit down for more than an hour. my leg will fall asleep, i'll get a pain in my arse.. basically locking up if i am sitting for too long — it's truly something else.

[chmswcrth]

it's always the mystery pains that ached the most. when you can't pinpoint the exact moment it happened. pets really have no care for your sleeping positions. as long as they're comfortable, everybody else can suffer. but then you feel so bad when you try to move them. what kind of dog do you have? who would have thought just resting would make it ten times worse? i have to keep going because once i sit down, my entire body goes stiff.

[cate-eblanchett]

so, are you a ghost now? I am sorry, you're talking to the wrong actress, the one who talks to dead people is Nicole Kidman. well, it depends, are you still attractive? because i wouldn't mind to see you in boxers and stealing your chips. Anyway, where in the world are you? because lately, we're never in the same city.

[chmswcrth]

yep. christopher the not so friendly ghost. dammit, it's the accent, i just presumed you were nicole. well this is awkward, do you know how i can find her? i don't know, looks can be subjective, it depends what you find attractive. but you certain cannot steal my chips, they are for me and me only. i'm mainly in la these days, but i sometimes go back to byron bay when i need to go back to a happier place. what about you?

[lizzieolsenfms]

I like to be prepared when it comes to trips. Waiting to the last minute puts me on edge and I'm not looking to feel stressed before traveling to Mexico. Feel like I'm the worst I will have things packed a week before to then go and re do the whole thing two days before because I changed my mind on things. I've tried them on I just don't know if they look good because a few are bikinis and I've not really shown off my bump like that but at this point there's not exactly hiding it. Did you know carrying a Hemsworth meant me carrying a literal giant? Especially since Baby Hemsworth loves kicking me in the ribs like it's some kind of soccer match in there. Don't laugh because that might be very, very real. The getting out of breath at this stage is real and damn. Depends but think we may need a mix depending on how uncomfortable I am. Just be prepared and don't groan when you have to pick me up, that is easily half your child.

[chmswcrth]

but we still have another week, that's over prepared. fair point, right now the less stress you have the better. i can pack for you? just take everything, it's not like you're going to be carrying your own bags anyway. just get the bump out, everybody is doing it these days, the baby deserves some sun as well. you're making a baby, you should be proud of it. i don't want to alarm you, but i was over ten pounds when i was born. hemsworths make big babies. maybe you just have very kickable ribs. or baby hems is already practicing for their sports career. you know i will carry you wherever you want to go. it's the least i can do since i helped put you in this situation. you do realise i've lifted weights heavier than you, baby and all. so i'm sure i'll be just fine. when we're in cancun, are you planning on taking a book?