all my stuff has been really dark recently so take some bear!patrick stump wholesomeness (kinda) i’ve finally started the offical sequel to my jerktrick headcanons too yayyy!! erm not sure what warnings to put besides nsfw content so yeahhh
“patience love,i’ll be done soon. i’m surprised you’ve held on so long”. patrick chucked , planting a small kiss on your neck. “such a good girl just for me”. despite your squirming his focus remained on his computer screen. he had a dead line to fulfill and he could flat you distract him.
it had been almost an hour and poor little y/n was getting tired of being patient. “i don’t know much longer i can hold on pat…i’m falling apart”.
he clicked his tongue in mock disappointment. “hmm, what happened to the good little girl who said she would sit in my lap- nice and still till i’m done my work”? patrick could feel how close you were, he just wanted to hear you beg for it.
your entire body felt as if it was engulfed in flames. the sensation of his cock buried deep inside you mixed with his large hands placed firmly on either side of your waist was borderline intoxicating. but you’d do anything to please him. so you kept still just liked he asked.
“i’m so close to being done sweet heart just a little longer”.
hihi recently came accross your blog and im liek 👀👀 hooked 👀👀 could you write like polyamory maybe👀with👀 ryan and brendon.. literally anything because i barely see this so im itching for whatever
your eyes are the size of the moon - po!brendon x po!ryan x reader
OHHHHMYMYGODDDD ME AND TOU ARE PSYCHICALLY LINKED LIKE FREAKING ALIENS
i was JUST thinking of this the other day. imagine its pretty odd era and you're high af with these pretty little hippies....,mmmmmmfggggh also im sorry rhis took so long i spent all of my nights watching the nba finals GO KNICKS anyways i hope you like it im sorry if it sucks i can't really describe the effects of weed well its just kinda vibey ok Bai
tags: drugs (weed), ryden x reader poly, reader is patd's producer, pretty odd era, m!receiving oral sex (blowjob), ryan's a cuck llol, they're kind of jerks but you straighten them up LMFAOAO
wc: 2.1k
it was supposed to be the day of recording the second track of pretty odd - nine in the afternoon. so far everything was going smoothly - the mics were all set up, instruments were tuned, and the boys were ready to perform at their best in the studio.
but that plan instantly changed the minute everyone sat down. when everyone was ready to record, ryan and brendon began getting off track a little too quickly. one minute they were singing the wrong lyrics, and the next, brendon turned to ryan in a fit of giggles asking what the hell his any of this was supposed to mean.
not to mention the obvious glances towards you every once in a while. it wasn't like you were wearing anything revealing - just a simple t-shirt and jeans. however, you couldn't help but notice the occasional sneak of brendon's eyes on your chest or how ryan's eyes lingered for a minute too long on your lips. but you pretended to ignore it, like how you pretended to ignore them whispering loudly about what you could only assume to be you.
a half hour had passed and you hadn't been able to get any usable shots of them singing or playing. spencer and jon, being the only ones taking anything seriously, looked at eachother with discomfort every once in a while. picking up on all of this, you knew something was up. still, frustration flooded your mind as you took off your headphones.
"maybe we should just start over tomorrow. i don't think the boys are feeling so great," spencer muttered behind his drumset. jon put his bass down and shook his head. "yeah, let's pick back up from here later. we're sorry for your time."
"oh...sure. yeah, i think we all need a break. we'll meet here at the studio tomorrow then? same time?" you offered, trying to lighten the moment. both seemed understandably bothered at ryan and brendon for being so obnoxious. they were all for having fun, but it was only the second track on the album and they couldn't even put the blunt down? were they even allowed to smoke in here?
spencer and jon nodded simultaneously and began to stand up and gather their things. brendon and ryan were lost in conversation, but still noticed the guys leaving. "where are you going?" ryan perked up.
"we're starting over tomorrow, come on," jon scolded, motioning his hands toward the door. him and spencer walked out, leaving you, ryan and brendon in the studio alone. the two of them seemed extremely confused for a few moments before they burst out in yet another fit of laughter.
you weren't stupid. you saw what was going on. the smell of pot stuffed up the whole studio and was practically lingering on your clothes. you took a deep breath and sighed, feeling full of disappointment. you just wanted to get this over with - get paid and get the hell out of here. this was only the second song on the track - you were barely done with recording any of the album. why was this so hard for them?
you pack up your equipment, ryan and brendon still chatting it up in the corner, teasing eachother loudly. no kidding, they sure were as high as the moon. you secretly wished you were too, not just to join in on the fun but to lay back and get your mind off all this. but you weren't planning to smoke anything right now, especially not with them. although you guys were friendly, you were still their producer - it just seemed unprofessional.
you gathered up your things and turned around, standing by the door ready to walk out. but as you opened your mouth to say goodbye, ryan beat you to it.
"hey, pretty girl. can i call you pretty? you're very pretty, by the way," ryan mused.
brendon slapped his shoulder. "stop it man, she's not gonna wanna-"
"do you want a hit? just one, cmon. it'll make you feel good." ryan offered, holding his blunt up high. the tip burned red as he held it to his mouth and blew out a few rings. the smell of pot was practically suffocating...but enticing.
sure, getting high on the job was unprofessional...but you weren't exactly on the job now, right?
"only if you teach me how to do that trick," you said quietly, your grin lopsided. setting down your bag, you tramped over to them in the corner, standing infront of them anxiously.
you took in the sight below you - two men who were practically touching the sky. ryan's hair curled perfectly against his cheeks as he looked up at you like a red-eyed angel. meanwhile, brendon gazed up at you admiringly, pupils blown out from a mix of the weed and lust.
"trust me baby, we can show you lots of tricks," brendon breathed hungrily, eyes drifting from yours to your chest. he snatched the blunt from ryan, earning him a shove and an annoyed look. brendon didn't seem to care as he brought the joint up to your lips for you.
“mmm, how do i know this isn't laced with anything?” you murmured, brendon still holding the blunt poised against your lips.
“please. do you really think we’d give you that crappy garbage? just inhale, c’mon.” ryan urged, shifting impatiently.
you obliged, inhaling deeply. smoke enveloped you and drifted in the air, making you cough. to your surprise, it was pretty decent. you wouldn't mind having some of this for yourself at home.
“this isn't terrible,” you hummed. “do you think you guys could maybe hook me up?”
brendon and ryan looked at eachother, taken aback by your straightforwardness. you felt a wave of anxiety rise in your chest as they began to snicker to themselves yet again. maybe it was a stupid question that you shouldn't have asked.
“damn, baby, if you insist…right here?” ryan raised his eyebrows while brendon continued to laugh to himself. “we were gonna ask you, but…”
“pretty girl knew we wanted to hook up. you’re dirty,” brendon teased, hooking his fingers through one of your belt loops and pulling you closer toward him. ryan scoffed at the sight, mimicking brendon's actions and yanking you more towards him instead. “stop it, bren,” ryan whined, gripping your waist firmly with jealousy.
realization washed over you as you toyed with the joint in your hands. it seems as if they had misinterpreted your question, but still admitted to wanting to mess around with you.
at this point, you had two options. you could back up and leave, ratting them out. you could tell the other band members, tell the press…shit, you could even sue. this was sexual harassment.
or you could take another hit and let it happen. let them do whatever they wanted with you. if they exposed you, they’d also be exposing their lack of professionalism and that they were smoking on the job. you had already accepted a blunt after all. you held your head up a little higher knowing that you had an advantage here.
let's be honest - it would be stupid not to take the second option. what did you have to lose? at this point, the idea of being proper seemed nonexistent. you were already one hit in and had both of these handsome boys drooling below you - the least you could do was have a little fun with them while they were still in the clouds.
“sure, let's just go with that,” you purred, eyes shifting from brendon’s to ryan's. tipping the blunt to your lips, you inhaled deeply again. this time, you slowly let out smoke above their heads, watching it dance around them.
“it seems like that's what you wanted anyways, no?” you coo at ryan, holding your hand out to cup his face gently. “otherwise i wouldn’t be standing above these two pretty boys who are trying to get me high for a quick fuck.”
ryan’s confident demeanor switches, his cheeks turning almost as red as his eyes from your gentle touch. out of the corner of your eye, you noticed brendon sulking, reaching for the joint in your hands.
“poor babies, you couldn’t focus today…too distracted thinking about getting me high and using me, huh?” you turned your attention towards brendon now, taking one last inhale of the blunt before dropping it on the floor and putting it out with your sneaker. “don't worry. ill treat you right. help you relax more than that shit could ever do.”
ryan and brendon both exchanged looks as if they had won the lottery as you sunk down to your knees in front of them. you peeled off your tshirt, leaving your plump tits on display for both boys to oogle at.
turning your attention to brendon first, you made quick work with his belt, unzipping his jeans tantalizingly slow with your teeth. slightly pulling down his boxers, you slid his dick out and took a second to admire it. his dick was long, the tip flushed pink and precum already beading. maybe the weed was finally kicking in, or maybe he really was prettier than you imagined (not that you’d ever thought you’d be doing this in a million years). you gave brendon a few kitten licks on his tip before swirling your tongue and taking him in your mouth gradually.
ryan whimpered upon seeing his best friend like this, taking the opportunity to undo his own belt and zipper. truthfully, the sight of brendon’s dick got him hard no matter what - he didn’t even have to be high. but god, it was so much better when he was. slipping out his own cock, he began to stroke his length heavily to the rhythm of your head bobbing.
you took brendon in your mouth fully, making him throw his head back and scrunch his face in pleasure. “fuuuuck, sweetheart,” he groaned deeply as you placed your hand at the base of his cock and began to stroke gently. letting your teeth graze ever so lightly, you continued hollowing your cheeks and nodding your head up and down on his length.
you turned your head to glance at ryan, feeling a little sorry you weren't giving him much attention. but ryan didn’t seem to mind, absolutely engrossed in the show in front of him. he watched endearingly as your tits bounced with every bob of your head. ryan’s ears perked up, getting off on brendon's breathy mewls that filled the muggy air.
soon enough, ryan’s strokes became erratic and sloppy, the drugs mixing with his upcoming climax made his head seem dizzy with pleasure and pot. before he could help it, ryan whined embarrassingly loud, shooting his thick ropes of cum all over you from your flushed cheeks to your bare chest. you were caught off guard but tried not to pull away from working on brendon, humming in praise on his throbbing cock.
seeing your pretty face and delicate tits sticky with his best friend’s cum instantly made butterflies shoot through brendon’s core. his breath became jagged as he struggled to compose himself, shifting in his seat whimpering for any sort of relief. brendon was practically fucking your face now, absolutely lost in his own pleasure. you continued to take him deep into your mouth, stroking his base roughly now. with one flutter of your tongue, brendon was pushed over on the edge, spurting his cum messily to the back of your throat. throwing his head back, he groaned aggressively, forehead gleaming with sweat and aching from overstimulation.
you accidentally dribbled down your chin, mouth full of brendon’s cream. before you had the reflex to wipe your mouth or swallow, you sat up and gazed at both boys, breathless and blissed out. suddenly, you grabbed ryan by the jaw and kissed him impossibly deep and tender. you felt brendon’s finish on your tongue seep into ryan’s mouth as he swished spit with you. brushing up against him just barely, you finally physically felt how wet your panties had gotten.
mewling a little, you pulled away after a moment, leaving ryan out of breath and brendon absolutely crimson. silence fell over the studio as you sat back on your heels again. the air stunk of sex and weed, overwhelming you and making your head ache.
“hey,” you wiped your mouth messily, swallowing a little. “teach me that trick next time, yeah?” you quipped, standing up and shuffling your shirt back on. ryan's eyes were screwed tight still, trying to catch his breath while nodding. brendon watched you passionately as ryan’s cum on your chest was seeping through the fabric, almost getting hard again.
“i hope you two are focused tomorrow…y’better have learned your lesson…” you stumbled a little, giving them one last look before either of them could form any coherent sentences. grabbing your stuff, you hurried out of the studio, stepping over the forgotten blunt on the floor.
people need to realise that a poor little meow meow must be a character who has committed atrocities you cannot poor little meow meow a good guy that’s not how this works
what this post has shown me is that so many of people on this hellsite cannot distinguish between a poor little meow meow and a blorbo from my shows smh
this one is for the rick-fuckers ESPECIALLY!!! but just anyone who likes art listen up.
a super talented artist by the name of @duvet-bunny is now taking commissions!! they recently did one for me and oh my god i was BEYOND pleased(≥◇≤) i cannot recommend them enough, plus they are super kind and just an awesome person in general<3
Girls need to shoplift regularly because our brains are optimized for foraging and when we're denied the chance to engage our natural impulses it triggers a stress behavior known as girlblogging
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