Constant Jackass

CJ (Carlos-Jordan) / 25 / Your local gay demisexual demiguy who's maybe obsessed with too many things (and p much only shitposts oops)

[adz]

reddit is having a glitch where it puts the wrong captions over photos and it’s the only thing i care about right now

[dietspam16]

[cryptotheism]

Dahling you simply must explore the backrooms they're just brimming with all sorts of delightful little entities.

[dragongirlsweetie]

otay mattie let's play rooms together yayyy

[cryptotheism]

Don't you just love the gauche wallpaper? It's so camp- what the fuck is that

[dogpuppy]

[sacred-portal]

[flipchild]

puppy cut flan 🍮🔪

[flipchild]

incredible puppy cut the flan technique

[flipchild]

badass flan slice performed by small type dogy

[unusualshrimp]

science enthusiasts LOOVE making media where a humble academic is abducted by the authorities and forced to go on a cool alien adventure against their will. it's like cnc for them

[hppjmxrgosg]

proud victim of the tumblr accent. it's fading out of public consciousness as the tik tok accent takes precedence; a linguistic evolution that makes the tumblr accent 85% funnier to unsuspecting civilians. it's like releasing a disease on a non-inoculated population. coughing baby versus hydrogen bomb.

[roadside--picnic]

[immigrant]

this was tumblr in 2013

[allegedly-human]

This is tumblr in 2026

[podcastwizard]

you don’t realize how important lunch is until you’re wandering around thinking about how unloveable and untalented and uniquely cursed you are and then it’s 4pm and you finally eat lunch and you go Oh. oh right.

[podcastwizard]

lot of people commenting on this post like "who eats lunch at 4pm that's a terrible time to eat lunch" yes. that is the point. 4pm lunch is inadvisable. 4pm lunch is not the ideal. 4pm lunch makes the mind demons real.

[dragongirlsweetie]

it's actually so crazy how much the simpsons would fucking suck if it didn't have any of the simpsons characters. just a bunch of shots of empty houses and streets for half an hour while nothing happens. that would be so badddd lol

[auroroboros1]

yeah that tends to happen when you remove characters from media. without characters its all just background. i guess movies set in scenic locations would still land as kinda nature docs but even then

[dragongirlsweetie]

it only happens with the simpsons

[auroroboros1]

this same criticism could be applied to nearly any media ever.

[dragongirlsweetie]

it's just the simpsons. are you a troll?

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Dragon's right, if you remove all the Simpsons characters from Death Note it hardly changes anything

[shamebats]

"it's just stress" oh thank god, it's just the silent killer that slowly kills you, perfectly harmless, no need to worry

[struwberrie]

handsy captain

[noralniart]

married life suits them so much

I'm actually addicted to zosan send help

[teaboot]

Can I be honest with yall I don't want to hear SHIT against cishets at pride this year

[teaboot]

"But it's not FOR them!!!" The biggest military power in the world belongs to a christofascist nation overseen by a felon found guilty of 34 federal crimes and has greenlit a gestapo with more direct funding than the entire military of Canada for the purpose of ethnic cleansing. Let Hetero Jessica throw some biodegradable glitter at a municipal parade

[teaboot]

At this point if anyone is trying to exclude anyone benignly pro-queer from a pro-queer space I'm just going to assume you're a fed or something idk like something something destabilize the movement from within or whatever

[beardedmrbean]

[wordfather]

idk if this is an usamerican thing or not but it always blows my mind as a small european country resident that yall have many names and types of apples???? what do you mean its not just red yellow or green??? why is it so complicated??? who is granny smith????

[wordfather]

'whats your favorite apple' 'red' 'no i mean like what type' '??????' actual conversatiom i've had with a mutual from usa

[wordfather]

THIRTY TWO??????

[phillyphillyphilly]

Listen that doesn’t even account for all the weird shit local farmers are getting up to.

May I present the best apple:

[wordfather]

the world is so big and beautiful

[nociceptrix]

tweet sequence of a not-quite-friend and artist i admire that i find myself thinking of constantly

[magicratfingers]

oh well i guess ill just be fat and hot

[magicratfingers]

guess ill be fat and hot and hot