No no, you don’t get it. Jesse and James are the absolute best there is at their jobs, but they have no idea what their jobs are.
They think that they’re thieves, agents of an elite criminal group led by Giovanni, stealing rare pokemon and advanced technology and such. And there might have been a time this actually was their jobs. In the first season or two, they frequently get angry phone calls about how they’ve fucked everything up, or get their expense account cut off because they have literally never turned a profit on their criminal enterprises and constantly procure and then lose/destroy expensive and elaborate devices.
But then the world came within a hair’s breadth of being destroyed, several times, and Jesse, James, and their weird cat rescued everybody. As terrible as they’ve always been at criminal endeavors of any kind, when the apocalypse approaches and they’re forced to step up, they’re really fucking good at saving the day.
And Giovanni is over here like… if the planet is destroyed, or time/space becomes unrecognizable, or civilization collapses, there’s no way for me to run a profitable criminal enterprise anymore. I need this planet, because it’s where I keep all my stuff. And I don’t pretend to understand the why of it, but these couple of bumbling nutcases that I should have fired years ago seem to be an important component of that? Somehow? So you gotta stop thinking about them in terms of acquisitions and start considering them… loss prevention. As in, even if you waste a million dollars a month on giant cat-faced robots and a vast array of fancy ball gowns and they never turn a profit, they are preventing all of your assets from going away at the same time because of something you can’t do anything about.
And that’s the great secret behind Team Rocket. These guys aren’t thieves, they’re professional superheroes (sponsored by organized crime). Of course, nobody ever bothered to tell them that.
Plus, as is frequently pointed out: Jesse and James are good at every other job EXCEPT Team Rocket. They’re actually smart businesspeople and run successful food and merchandise stands and are great salespeople.
Hell, even in Team Rocket situations where they’re not chasing after Pikachu they’ve done better.
It’s just their Achilles Heel is one damn OP rodent.
Honestly I love this because it implies that Scooby is just a guy with a bunch of dogs that drag him into trouble then somehow solve mysteries and crimes and he's just there like. My dog has a magnifying glass with her. Why. Why does she have that. And Shaggy (which is such a good name for a dog) is the only one close to acting like a regular dog. I also like to imagine that police will congratulate Scooby on solving another mystery and everytime he has to explain that it was actually his dogs that kept giving him clues and trying to put it together until he figured out what they were trying to communicate but no one in law enforcement believes him so everyone thinks he's a genius detective but in reality he just wants to go about his day, hang out with his cousins and chill with some snacks and his dogs (but 3 of his dogs are determined to solve mysteries and 1 comes along looking distressed everyday)
Gotta admit I was looking for brushstrokes on some of them. Like, most of them are obviously well positioned photos, but some of them you just have to take a long look at.
the wallcreeper is a passerine bird found in high mountains, their range spinning from southern europe to central china. a fairly nondescript gray and black bird, the wallcreeper avoids the eye until they spread their distinctive crimson wings. their primary prey, insects, are hunted by inching & hopping along rock faces and reaching into crevices, often in a ‘crawling’ motion, earning these birds their name. they are often silent, yet remain fiercely territorial. males and females both participate in rearing the young. both sexes display the brilliant crimson plumage; the only difference one might spot when observing is that females typically only sing when defending territory, as opposed to the male’s more frequent relaxed singing.
I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one who has trouble remembering developmental milestones. I put these together, but can’t take credit for any of the photography. Hope someone finds them helpful!
Every writer needs to see this because I’m really tired of otherwise competent novels in which a two year old is like “mother dearest I do believe I am quite frightened” or conversely they’re supposed to be five and going “me hungie!!!”
Just as promised! Here are some extra scenes that didn’t make the final cut.
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One thing I wished I spent more time on was Sam’s struggle parenting and taking care of little Tommy. Looking back at the previous parts of the AU, I felt like Tommy’s bond with Dream was more developed than with Sam’s, which is kinda unfortunate since this was initially an Awesamdad and Childinnit centered AU. Nonetheless, here’s the extra scenes to compensate for that 😆
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The “take your child to work day” scene was supposed to take place before Sam hired Tubbo, Ranboo, and Foolish to babysit Tommy (which was in part 2). I initially cut this part out because I felt like it would interfere with Dream not knowing Tommy was de-aged (since he’s still in prison at this point) and that this would’ve raised some suspicion. But I found this scenario too hilarious not to share :3
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Yea, pinch those cheeks 😤
Team rocket shenanigans cuz I miss them 😭
(Based on this ask)
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Just Quackity being a big bro and helping Tommy steal some cookies while not getting caught by dad—
(More below ⬇️)
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Eret my beloved, I am so sorry I neglected you in this AU 😭
Anyway, just two kings hanging out. Sam, at the beginning, didn’t see himself as a parental figure to Tommy. He was in the mindset that he was a temporary caretaker/babysitter. 😅
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Also on why Sam didn’t get trapped with The Egg in canon—
(Can male creepers even get pregnant—?)
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Bedrock Bros to satisfy your day :3 (for the people that wanted more Techno and Childinnit bonding)
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And last but not least, the epilogue.
Tommy still hires Jack to work under him despite the assassination attempts. Sam comes over once in a while to… supervise.
Tubbo and Ranboo adopt Michael afterwards to fill that hole little Tommy left :,)
And Quackity whenever little Tommy comes up be like 🥺🥺🥺
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Oh yeah, The Egg is still an issue…
Ha ha, yep… (;; ’w ’)
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There’s also an Alternate Ending that I’ve talked about here, if you haven’t seen it already ;D
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AND THATS ALL FOR NOW, FOLKS!
These extras are just here if I ever want to revisit the AU in the future, but for now I’m finished.
As always, I am cool with anyone wanting to make a fanfic or fanart of this AU. I’m also cool with people making their own variations that doesn’t follow my comics, no need to ask permission 👍🏽.
I’m open to hear your thoughts on the Hotel Arc Childinnit AU, what you like/dislike, any more questions to elaborate on, or what you wished could’ve happened etc. if whenever my Ask Box is open 😉
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