everyday i wake up and i go âgod iâm so tired. i canât do this anymore.â and then i get up and i continue to do it

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@clean-nicotine
everyday i wake up and i go âgod iâm so tired. i canât do this anymore.â and then i get up and i continue to do it
you ever feel like you were born with something rotten inside you and if people get close enough theyâre gonna find out
i hate eating but also hate not eating. I don't eat and I'm not hungry but I'm exhausted and dizzy and depressed but then I eat and I get a hunger pang
I literally ate 32g of protein 405 calories and an apple why am I hungry when I wasn't hungry before I ate??
my work is saying they're getting food from Charley's for us....pls tell me why the only calorie safe meal is a loaded potato soup. WHY is a basic salad over 1000 calories??? are they injecting the lettuce with LARD????
TW: mentions of depression///vent
those days where the depression feels so physical- like I can almost FEEL a slow tug deep in my soul-its so crippling.
I don't know how I'm expected to just show up to work and act like everything is normal.
It feels like I'm barely keeping my head above water, sounds I hear being muffled from the waves. I'm just so tired, my thoughts are so irrational and all consuming, I'm so exhausted.
Feeling full makes me feel dirty and disgusting
morning skinny is the best motivation to wake up to I swear
like why would I want to ruin how I look just because I'm hungry?
let's keep these good vibes goingggg WHOOOO!!
kate moss inspo <3
just tried on my swim suits for the first time for this summerâŚâŚhey!! why did i do that!!!
whhhyyyy are the last few hours of a fast so difficult?? i can handle the hunger, its the BRAIN FOG that gets me. i feel like im floating and just cant focus on ANYTHING
â thinspo â
my belly feels soooo flat rn, even tho fasting hurts the longer I go i LOOOOOVEEE the emptiness in my stomach
starting my day with black coffee w a little sugar free sweetener. so far I'm on hour 19 of my fast, gonna go till 24 hours probably. I might push it a little farther tho who knows. I have a salad packed for lunch today in case I wanted to break my fast at the 24 hour mark.
I'm hanging out w my bf later today and its gonna be a little difficult to restrict around him bc i feel like he'll notice, i rlly hate making him worry :(
any tips would be appreciated other than the "im just not hungry"
This shit was easier as a teenager. Now I'm 24, still sick and need to work clean cook maintain relationships and do like a million other things while worrying about not being thin enough.
Just prove that this shit stays with you forever.
fr tho like having this disorder as a 14-17 yr old was a walk in the park bc i had no REAL problems or responsibilities yet.
In the end I never actually got better, I just got distracted.
the dog in me when i donât lose 40 lbs overnight
Man, I do not like myself at all.
Fucking cringe, rude, hypocritical piece of shit.
[edit: and selfish! I forgot selfish.]
fuck recovery. im over it. coming back once again
me rn, i always end up coming back no matter how much i try to convince myself im healed