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@cnlyfans
𓍢 ・ cnlyfans ⁝ cute little writing blog that thrives on vibes. must be 21+ to interact & no follow backs. discord available upon request.
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gaze narrows and angry laughter follows . that's all she has to offer him , refusing to give more of a reaction . he knows what he's doing , they both do . still , she stands there and curls her fingers into the palms of her hands , digging her nails in deep . one mississippi , two mississippi -- "give me that ." snatches the bottle from his possession and takes a swing of it , welcoming the burn down her throat . it was always present in the room between them , during all the good times and bad ; the huge fucking elephant that pressed on her chest so hard sometimes she could hardly breathe . "then don't fucking pick up ."
“ take it. ” what the hell did he care ? “ fridge is stocked. ” for now. he planned to have it cleared out by morning. give himself a few hours of being absent of all thought. thoughts of the club, thoughts of his stupid fucking brothers, school — her. it’d be so much easier if she had gone home with someone else tonight. at least then she wouldnt be here, in his face, reminding him of what he refuses to allow himself to want. giving her his back, he pads across the room and twists the dial on the retro speaker in an attempt to drown out anything else she had to say. “ what ? ” brings his free hand to his ear as if he hadn’t heard her. the truth was he’d always pick up. always.
three years later.
when anastasia got the call that morning telling her there was a position open for the week as a temporary assistant for an executive with a lot of money ( emphasis on the 'a lot' ) , there was no way she was going to turn down the opportunity . especially with rent money due around the corner . so she accepted with the promise of getting there on time . with her best skirt ( pressed perfectly with no wrinkles thanks to her hair straightener ) and crisp button-down on , borrowing a pair of heels from her roommate , rusty , she was setting up the office space , following the instructions laid out for her . commotion erupted outside , several voices masking together as they file into the room , but the only one she can recognize is .. his . there's a pause , waiting for it to go away . she had to be hallucinating . maybe she was still a little bit hungover , but when she turns around to face them , she sees him at the head of the table ... well , shit . / @cnlyfans
he spotted her well before she turned to see him. allowing a moment to reacquaint himself with the shape of her. gaze trailing from the heels on her feet, up her toned legs — noting a couple of rogue wrinkles at the hem and how inappropriate the length of it was for such a professional setting. riddle enterprises, prided itself on employee retention. most of the women around the office were hired back its inception, making them old and less than appealing to look at. but at least the men beneath him had little to no distraction, and deadlines were being promptly met. he lifts his chin while several overlapping voices ring around him, but he doesn’t hear a word. attention pooling to a pair of eyes that used to beg up at him. she looked surprised to see him. interesting. he supposed he'd never mentioned his father's company in the midst of their ... time together, but surely the name would have set off some alarm bells. he releases a sharp sigh, silencing the constant chatter. “ everyone out. ” they all come to their feet and begin to file out, and as they do he makes sure to catch her gaze, “ not you. ”
“ same fucking shit, ford. the implication was still there, “ it dawned on lailah that a lot of people underestimated her… and sometimes it felt like ford did too. like he ” saved " her or something. it was like being his girlfriend made him a hero. “ i know good and damn well what i can and can't do… sayin' i wouldn't? that's different. like you don't think i'm capable of that shit. ” she grumbled, her southern drawl pouring out.
his back is turned to her as she speaks, granting him an opportunity to roll his eyes without paying the price for it. “ well — ” he tosses his gloves into the locker, “ you won’t. ” he didn’t mean it as a slight to her character, but they both knew it would take a lot more than a few missed calls and unanswered texts to drive her away. pushing the metal door shut, he finally twists around to meet her eyes. shoulders slouched, body sore from a three match losing streak. his head was anywhere but this argument, despite knowing how deserving she was of his undivided attention. “ look, i’m sorry if the topic of you leaving me isn’t exactly high on my list of conversations i’d like to have. in fact, i’m just about willing to say whatever you want to hear to make it stop. ”
soraya let a heavy silence settle between them, her eyes filled with a mix of disgust, confusion, and revulsion. “ fuck you, ” she scoffed, hurriedly packing her belongings. the audacity that cohen displayed shocked her. she understood that their situation was precarious, but that didn’t give him any justification for his rudeness. “ i'm not even fucking running back to him, you're jumping the gun because of your own insecurity that maybe he's better than you. ” she didn't mean that. of course she didn't. she was just hurt.
deciding to make himself useful, he bends at the waist to retrieve a pair of her underwear from the floor. “ you already did. ” the quip comes a beat late, but with no less bite, as he loops them around his index finger and holds them out to her. maybe there was some truth to her words. he wasn’t used to feeling at a disadvantage — on the ice or off. everything he wanted usually fell into his lap, leaving him to rarely want. so the fact that the one thing he wanted more than anything else right now was treating him like an option was a real hit to the ego. “ we’re beyond this being about insecurities. i know how this shit goes. ” he scoffs, eyes fixed on her. “ you disappear every time he wants you back, and i’m supposed to just what ? sit here with my dick in my hand until he hurts your feelings again ? ”
replies finally queued <3
“ he couldn’t take his eyes off you tonight. that’s gotta feel pretty good, right ? it’s what you wanted. ” / @ivygrcws. ( inspo )
“ if you really want me to pretend lastnight didn’t happen, i will. but not unless you say it to my face. that text was a fucking cop out and you know it. ” / @deryapinar
“ is there someone upstairs ? ” he pauses, turning his ear to the sound of shuffling. “ who is in our home, lucy ? ” / @parisgoodbyes
“ i never said you couldn’t leave. i said you wouldn’t. ” / @aftrbdy
“ so that’s it … you’re just gonna go running back to him because he finally got hit hard enough to remember you exist ? ” / @aftrbdy
“ you thought just because i have a soft spot for you, i’d do this shit for free ? ” / @deliriouslonging
she couldn’t hold onto the ring anymore . she didn’t need a reminder of what clearly wasn’t there between them , solidified by the lack of affection from the person who gave it to her . she did him a favor when his father came to town that she didn’t have to , and now that he was gone , there was nothing keeping her from holding onto it . she looked stupid enough as it is coming there asking questions she wouldn’t like the answers to . tried to convince herself that maybe he’ll change his mind , but they both knew that he didn’t accompany the heart she was looking for . he wouldn’t make her feel better — he didn’t have the emotional capacity to do so . “i didn’t come here for a lecture ,” a frown edges the corners of her mouth downward . she shouldn’t be surprised by the complete 180 his mood had taken , yet still remains taken aback by the switch in both tone and demeanor . he had a point , one she’ll brush off to make room for her own peace of mind , fighting tooth and nail to keep her emotions at bay . he was good at unraveling her in order to remain in possession , taking hold of her life as if he owned it . “and i don’t want anything , especially from you .” didn’t expect him to side with her , doing the best she can to take care of herself since no one else was going to .
despite his readiness to be rid of her, he steps closer. “ you genuinely thought that because i played nice long enough to get what i wanted out of you, i was suddenly going to confess to some deeply repressed feelings. ” the irony of it after spending the better part of a year making her life a living hell. he clicks his tongue, giving a slow shake of his head. “ but there’s something missing from that rhetoric, isn’t there ? ” he murmurs, “ a pretty important detail you keep conveniently leaving out. ” and he was willing to bet every cent in his trust fund that he already knew what it was, or at least where it stemmed from. “ what were you doing before you came here, anastasia ? ” brows lift, but he’s not quite ready for her to chime in just yet. so his gaze drifts down her body, taking in the casual disarray of her clothes — like she’d only just rolled out of bed. it all seems to click, drawing a low rumble from deep in his throat as realization settles in. “ you knew exactly how i’d react. that was the whole point, wasn’t it ? ” another step closer. “ you want this. the humiliation. the shame. the rejection. ” his eyes lock onto hers. “ you need to hear me say it so you can go home and get off on it. ” admit it.
tension flares , knowing him well enough by now to understand he was borderline tipsy . "you could lay off the beer ," she crosses her arms , feeling like he'd just socked her in the chest with words he knows will hurt her . "i didn't know it was such a big deal , leo . i'll just go to their place next time , save you the trouble ."
“ i could, ” he concedes, the bottle slipping to his side. his eyes, heavy with the weight of recent events, settle on hers. “ are you asking me to ? ” he holds her gaze in challenge, though the irritation simmering beneath it is entirely misplaced. she owes him nothing; she’s done nothing to cross the invisible line he keeps drawing in his own head. bradley’s only crime is that she happened to be standing in the path of his frustration. “ great, ” he says at last, bitterness threading through the word. “ i’ll get just enough sleep to answer your call when you need someone to pick you up. ”
hiatus until june <3
“ nothing’s wrong with me. i’m just fucking tired. ” brings the bottle to his lips, taking a sip. “ if you’re so concerned you could give me one night where i don’t have to drown out the sound of your headboard banging against my wall. ” / @parisgoodbyes
she didn't have anything for herself : not a home , not a family . nothing to tie her down to appreciate the things he'd listed . where her siblings had their mother , she had her father and now he was gone ; stuck behind bars with no freedom in sight . her family couldn't bare the sight of her anymore and she resented herself for never being the person chosen , allowing to fall down the rabbit hole of self-destruction when she was once considered valuable .. valedictorian , class president , prom queen .. anything to allow herself to be seen . which turned her life upside down , labeled the town slut soon after her last name was smeared into the dirt and she enabled poor behavior , becoming an inconvenience . she swallows to wet her mouth , turning her face away from his touch in order to focus on the wall adjacent . "i don't have anything anymore ," sliver of the only truth she'll allow before she's removing her arms as a barrier and looking down at her hand , the ring and slowly peeling it from her finger , "here ." she reaches to grab his wrist in order to place the diamond onto his palm , "i believe this belongs to you as well ."
her soft skin shifts beneath his touch, causing his thumb to pad over her cheek. any other day he would’ve taken the gesture as a sign of defiance and reacted accordingly, forcing her back so that her eyes had nowhere to land but on his features. but he becomes distracted by the shuffle at her waist and drops his gaze down just in time to see her flip his free hand over and place the ring in it. on instinct his fingers curve around the antique gold, a quiet resentment forming in his chest. it was one thing for him to ask for it back, it was another for her to offer it. he releases a sharp breath through nostrils, removing himself from her long enough to shove it into his pocket and fix her with another glare. “ how many pity parties are we to throw for you in one year, anastasia ? ” whatever warmth he felt a moment ago had completely iced over. “ you say you have nothing, and yet you have a life here. bottom of your class aside, you’re on track to graduate. you still have a few people who have yet to figure out how annoying you are. and if this — tantrum has anything to do with your father, then spare me, please. he’s alive, and as safe as one can be in a medium security prison. ” his shoulders roll as if her feelings are of no consequence to him. “ what more could you possibly want ? ”
