Coffee Goth princess

Raging bisexual Writer Wreck Follow my writing blog notquitebroken

[shitpostsfromtheinvisiblelibrary]

Irene: What are you in the mood for?

Kai: World domination.

Irene: That's a bit ambitious.

Kai: You are my world.

Irene: Aww...

Kai:

Irene:

Kai:

Irene: OH.

[homunculus-argument]

God will see you at the lowest point of your life, and say "what the fuck I thought I killed that thing." But you skitter too fast and you are too creepy.

[idontknowokayhelp]

Me, in my coffin: shit i forgot my headphones

[cyphir-spacerobot]

Victor Frankenstein after achieving the impossible and building a fucking person from scraps of the dead: Oh god, ew, ew it's ugly! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew! Ew! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew!

[koiagain]

[shitpostsfromtheinvisiblelibrary]

Alberich: Babe, you're so funny!

Margaret: We have 1492 days until your tragic premature death. You will break my trust three times before that happens, but I forgive you.

Alberich: Awwww, that's sweet of you!

[shitpostsfromtheinvisiblelibrary]

Kai: Hey, Li Ming, have you thought about having children?

Li Ming: ...

Li Ming: Does looking over you and the others not seem like I already do? Because I promise you, it sure feels like it.

Kai: But we're not childr-

Li Ming, already distracted: IRENE, PUT THE FIRE DOWN!

[shitpostsfromtheinvisiblelibrary]

Vale, rushing into the room: It’s terrible, just terrible! I am so upset!

Irene: Vale, honey, sit down! Sweetheart, tell us all about it. Kai, would you get Vale some water?

Kai: What are they gonna do with water? Has water ever made you feel better when you were upset? Have you ever heard anyone say, “Thank God, the water’s here!”?

[shitpostsfromtheinvisiblelibrary]

Kai: Someone take me to art museums and make out with me.

Irene: But they said not to touch the masterpieces.

Kai: Well somebody's got to pin the artwork to the wall.

Vale, on a walkie talkie: This is Vale, those idiots are fucking around in the East wing again.

[tainbocuailnge]

the original got flagged with no way to appeal it when every contributor is deactivated but I will never let this post die. it's monday and we are getting on it cunts

[shitpostsfromtheinvisiblelibrary]

Irene: Pros and cons of dating me.

Irene: Pros. You'll be the cute one.

Irene: Cons. Holy shit, where do I begin-

[shitpostsfromtheinvisiblelibrary]

Irene: Why are your tongues purple?

Silver: We had slushies. I had a blue one.

Vale: I had a red one.

Irene: oh.

Irene:

Irene: OH.

Catherine:

Catherine: You drank eachothers slushies?

[ravioliet]

walking a mile in the shoes of someone you dislike is actually kinda awesome because not only are you now a mile away from that idiot but you also have their shoes

[zootycoon-archive]

i got these knockoff boots online and instead of the brand name on the tag they have the name of an apparently nonexistent martin scorsese movie??? what the fuck

[loseremo]

[syzygy-yzygy]

THE ORIGINAL? ON MY DASH

[this-too-too-sullied-flesh]

this post led to a series of events that had martin scorsese himself reacting to his alleged movie goncharov and it has less than 400k notes almost 3 years later?

[eilooxara]

Oat milk was discovered much more recently than you may have known. Like many now-familiar technologies, it was found by accident during the Apollo program when NASA learned what a zero-g environment does to goat milk.

[nytfythfhtyf]

hgtv show hosts: we made this dark disgusting house into a nice bright warm cozy masterpiece

the house:

[cybersexanalyst-deactivated2023]

needs a pop of color . . . I think some red accents would really give it that homey feel :)

[windewehn]

[unyieldingsilence]

‎ ‎

[madlori]

[thebibliosphere]

The kid next door (talking toddler age) is playing outside and just wiped out in his Fisher Price car, and I just heard the babysitter say, “oh no, your insurance premium is definitely going to go up!” And the kid who had only been mildly sniffling before made the most confused, but startled sound you’ve ever heard.

Just very clearly an attempt at saying, “my what?”

He straight up forgot about his scraped knee and is now worried about whatever the fuck an insurance premium is.

[xxxdragonfucker69xxx]

[dogpuppy]