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Wendy RestingOurPatience

Wendy was seen today lying 🤥 Though she claims to have never slept with Kyle, multiple sources confirmed it to us. One being from his own household. They had the chance to be honest, but the cat must be let out of the bag.

@thekyleyb @wendy-the-great

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA I WAS RIGHT I WAS RIGHT HAHAHAHAHA FUCK YOU KYLE FUCK YOU WENDY LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO @ everyone @ everyone @ everyone @ everyone

#; blogging #eavesdroppingonurn

Wendman otp

;)

#; blogging #; anonymous

what's ur body mass index

you do know that shit isnt realiable right

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y u so pussy

you are what u eat ig

#; blogging #; anonymous

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Chili Con Carnival Fake-Out

It was a hilarious prank. Legendary even. Cartman's brilliance had struck once again and the prank master would come out on top with everyone telling him what a savage he was.

It had started when Cartman spotted Butters's parents pumping gas into their car with some large bags in the backseat. Cartman had waddled up to them and asked what they were up to. A vacation they said. Just a week get-away and then they'd be back.

The thought of "It would be so funny if they never came back" popped into Eric's head, which was then quickly followed by, "It would be even funnier if I made Butters think they'll never come back." And so, he went to scheming.

Getting his hands on pig's blood and guts was easy. Gaining access to Butters's home while he was asleep? Also easy. He'd been friends with the guy since they were kids. Cartman knew his routines like the back of his hand.

He snuck in and threw a bucket filled with pungent, red fluid and viscera over Mr. and Mrs. Stotch's bed. Next, he went to smearing and pouring more blood from their room, down the hallway and into the rest of the house, creating a horrible, horrible sight. Finally, he set to work making a mess of the place, knocking over and smashing whatever he could without waking up Butters.

The final step was to run out while leaving the front door open. Voila, he had the perfect prank.

It was so funny the way that Butters seemed so devastated. It took so much of Eric's willpower to not laugh as he pretended to comfort him. Everyone would think this was all so hilarious once the Stotch parents came home. Sure, Butters would be butt hurt and throw a pity party but he always got over it.

He always did.

Right?

@solarissolace

solarissolace

He couldn’t remember the last time he was this mad. If anyone saw the normally cheerful blond teenager stomping down the street to the Cartman residence, they would see less of a teenager and more of a storm. He couldn’t believe what he did this time. He felt torn, betrayed, and a layer of sorrow and anger at himself for even believing him was just below the surface. Butters’s face was pulled into a harsh scowl as he thought about Eric. The way he comforted him, the way he had held him while he had cried. The way his words twisted his mind once again, he knew better to assume anything Eric said was true and yet he did. Time and time again. But he swore, that this was the last time he ever associated or even looked in Eric’s direction. He was a monster.

It was an open secret how he was treated at home, sure people might not know the extent, but Eric most certainly did. He used that, he manipulated Butters’s mind until it was putty. He wanted to scream and lash out at the world. However, he couldn’t. He only had one person to holler at. Eric wasn’t going to get away with it this time. Faking his parents death? Leaving a trail of blood and guts? That was too much. Eric had once again broke his heart, and he wasn’t sure how many more times he would have to put it back together. This time, he swore he was done. He was done with virus poisoning his mind, he was done feeling destroyed by Eric Cartman.

Butters arrived at the house on the war path, before going over to the fenced off backyard. He easily climbed over the fence and hopped, not minding the splinters. He knew Eric as well as Eric knew Butters, their back door slider was always unlocked. Walking in, Butters stormed up the stairs, all the while getting madder. He wasn’t being quiet or light on his feet, let Eric know what chaos was coming.

Butters threw open the door, before slamming it behind him. The glare in his eyes was hotter than a thousand suns, and his hands were curled into such tight fists. Eric had a way of dominating a room. If not for his weight, but for his presence. Butters felt himself shrink a little, intimidated as always, but he stubbornly held his ground. He wasn’t 8 anymore.

“Eric that does it!” Butters yelled, getting closer to the person who he stupidly called his friend. “You are darn lucky that I know how to clean up blood and that the trash is coming tonight. I had to make nonrefundable deposits on coffins and funeral services that I had to cancel!”

Butters felt himself getting madder and madder as he carried on. “My parents are alive! They are in Hawaii! They texted me a video of themselves partying it up! Why’d you have to go and convince me they were dead?”

Butters huffed, not used to expelling that much anger that wasn’t passive aggressive. “Say your piece and that’s it, I’m done. We’re done. I’m not gonna be your little buddy anymore!”

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Eric had made what he thought to be a valiant effort to not laugh. But fuck, upon hearing Butters scream about nonrefundable coffins and funeral services, he couldn't hold it back any longer.

"You mean to tell me-" His words began to be interrupted by cruel snickering. "That you ACTUALLY went out and bought coffins ?" He grinned as though all this time, Cartman had merely pranked Butters on something like changing his username or hiding a favorite shirt. As though the emotional damage that he'd caused was a trivial matter.

To Cartman- it was.

Perhaps predictably, he threw his head back and laughed uproariously. "You really!" He managed between shrieking peals of laughter. "Went out and bought COFFINS! Oh my GOD, I can't believe it! You really are stupid!"

He wasn't taking Butters seriously. Eric never did. If that wasn't apparent before, it certainly was now. He was too relaxed. Too casual. Too at ease. Not even a hint of shame could be detected coming from him. Was that ultimately why it was so easy for him to fool Butters? The fact that ultimately, Cartman never cared about how his actions affected others?

He already had a dozen back-up plans for how to win Butters over after this. It would be easy. He'd done it before. Maybe not to this extreme, but wasn't that the fun of it? The thrill of the game? To see just how far he could push someone before they broke completely?

And so he launched into it. "Why are you so upset Butters? I did you a favor! You got to see what life was like without them for a few days! They're always so hard on you- I thought you'd enjoy thinking they couldn't hang over you anymore for a bit!"

#; thread #solarissolace #(shows up holding a starbucks super late)#(whats up guys)#(fjdksfjdk sorry this took literal months man)

Smash or pass Kyle

im not catching the ginger jew from his nasty ass.

why the fuck do people keep sending me dudes asking if ill fuck them. im not fucking gay.

#; blogging #anonymous

jokes on u porky the pig i dont have a mom

yeah she killed herself after having you for a kid.

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whats up lil dick what we doin 2day

thats not what your mom said last night when my dick was buried in her.

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stop yo bitchin n answer my asks u lard ass mf