Hecate

godess of destruction and evil

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

Checkers and Chess

We talked nearly every day

I told you things I hadn’t told anyone else

We bonded really well

Even went on dates together

You said you liked me

And I came to realize I loved you

you were emotionally unavailable

and yet you still led me on

The emotions caught up with us

And you said it was too much for you

You disappeared into thin air

left me broken and angry

And after all this time

I came to realize

You were playing checkers

while I was playing chess

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

Because everything changes. Nothing stays the same for long. The minute you’re used to something, the minute you think, “oh, this is how life is,” life finds a way of surprising you. You never know what life is gonna throw at you. And you have two choices: Run from it... or run at it.

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

“I don’t think I have the words to explain how much you mean to me. You’ve helped me more than any other person has ever in my entire life. The long walks to nowhere, the long nights of laughing at what seems like nothing and everything, the pep talks, the ego checks. I haven’t many people close, but I’m happy I let you in. You never fail to slap me in the face with reality when I need or deserve it, nor do you hesitate to give me a helping hand when it’s obvious that I can’t do it on my own. I don’t know what I’d do without you.

I love you”

- colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

“It’s okay.

Saving me was never your job anyway.”

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

Of course she has a loud voice, of course she is always yelling, because at home no one is listening to her.

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

It’s weird to think that in this very moment someone is lying alone in their deathbed, balancing between life and death or reuniting with an old lover, tightly wrapped in a warm embrace or writing a suicide note, pondering different ways to say goodbye, right in this moment someone’s heart is fluttering from a first kiss and someone’s is breaking from a goodbye.

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

“And then I felt sad because I realized that once people are broken in certain ways, they can’t ever be fixed, and that is something nobody ever tells you when you are young.”

~ Unknown

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

“Do you ever get that feeling when you’re sitting in your room alone, your thoughts wander, you’re not crying but you just feel sad and empty, replaying moments from your life and wondering. Where did it all go wrong?”

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

“I’m beginning to realize how little I mean to everyone.”

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

“I’m that person everyone replaces after a while.”

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

“Have you ever wanted to cry, and no tears came out. So you just sit there, quietly, and feel your heart break into tiny pieces while everything crumbles around you.”

~ colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

“but if I sit in the rain, maybe I can drown in something other than my own thoughts.”

~ Unknown

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

“If this is how my life is going to be, I don’t want it anymore.”

~ Unknown

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

“People keep telling me that life goes on, but to me that’s the saddest part.”

~ Unknown

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

Do NOT blame suicidal people for wanting to die

They can’t help it.

They are in a kind of pain you can’t even imagine.

The last thing they need is more guilt.

They trusted you enough to tell you, don’t guilt trip them.

If you don’t know how to help them, please ask a professional for advice.

It takes much strenght to survive suicidal thoughts. They are strong but they need help and support. 

It is NOT their fault, nor yours. They just need support.

Suicidal pain is exhausting and they only want to rest. Try to understand, not blame them.

They need professional help.

They are not selfish.

They are ill.

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

“I already said too much. I already shared too much, and I want all my secrets back. I hate getting close to people these days, I always regret sharing too much, caring too much, doing too much, feeling too much.”

[colorfulbiscuithandsdiplomat]

“Never have I dealt with anything more difficult than my own soul.”

~ Unknown