15x03 RANT, CAS AND DEAN’S RELATIONSHIP, AND THE SAM OF IT ALL.
I was talking about spn on my other blog and got this ask about Dean’s actions towards Cas lately and I clearly had A LOT to say about it, so thought I’d post it here as my 1st official post, since that ended up fueling the creation of this blog. Thanks @cookiesand-lemonade for sending that ask. Now bear with me while I overanalyze the shit out of last week’s episode.
I get Dean is going through his own shit, Jack just killed his mother a few days ago, God turned out to be bad, and the mind-fucking realization that their entire lives has been all for God’s entertainment and to add a “drama factor” to his “favourite show” hit him like a truck. I get he is angry, I get this is all too much, I get this is Dean Winchester’s way of dealing with things/feelings. Which is, basically, not really dealing with it. And taking it out on ppl who don’t actually deserve it.
In my honest opinion, Cas didn’t do anything that bad. What would’ve mattered if he had told them abt Jack killing the snake? Sure it was odd, and a little creepy, but then again Dean himself tried to check whether Jack was good or bad using angel’s/devil’s food cake. They all weren’t sure, they all didn’t REALLY know it.
In all occasions, even in the very dim, no-way-out times, Cas has stood by him. Cas rebelled for him, throwed all his beliefs in the trash for him. Imo Cas is very deeply in love with Dean (but that’s even besides the point here). He has done everything, given everything, he has brought Dean back from irreversible fates way too many times, has talked him out of sacrifice too many other more. And he has even been there when he knew Dean’s choices weren’t the best, even when plans weren’t always the right choice.
So it makes me so upset that after 10 years of this, Dean is being such a dick to Cas. Cas absolutely does not deserve it. I love Dean, I really do, and I get why he’s acting this way, why he always has. But this doesn’t justify it or make it right. He ought to realize that.
Imo, Dean didn’t expect Cas to leave. He’s treated Cas like shit before, way too many times, and Cas has always still stood there by his side, refusing to leave. “Everyone you love will be long gone, except me” is an incredible proof of that. He never had any plans of leaving Dean’s side even though he was a murderous psycopath at that time (with the mark of Cain).
And again imo, Dean got used to pushing Cas’s buttons too much, gotted used to the idea that even tho Dean Winchester hurts the ones he loves and pushes them away, Cas was the exception, because time and time again he made it known that he would never leave, no matter what.
But this is too much. Cas lost his son, Cas lost his father, Cas realized he’s an angel of an asshole lord and his entire faith system is a lie, he recently found out his powers are failing. Dean isn’t the only one suffering here. Cas is suffering, Sam is suffering, this is all just a big pile of suffering.
Cas tries to talk to Dean, so many times. It’s absurd to me that Dean won’t even ask what happened in hell, what Cas had to do. Burning his son’s corpse to a crisp must have been a very traumatic ordeal. Dean didn’t even seem to think of that. Cas tells him his powers are failing, and I think at this point this hits Dean, but he’s too angry to show he cares. So he lets Cas leave, because it’s easier, he doesn’t have to talk feelings, and because that confirms the rule that’s been etched in his brain since he was a child: everyone leaves him, he hurts everyone he loves.
The fact Dean says that when something goes wrong, it’s always Cas, is SO WRONG. He couldn’t be more wrong. They’ve all made mistakes and changed plans last minute. And I think this confirms Cas’s deepest fear, that he’s only needed by the Winchesters when he can be useful. That he’s not wanted around when he isn’t. And to me, Cas did the only possible thing he could after that. He left, because how much longer should he be apologising and chasing after Dean? Dean said the absurd and terrible words “you’re dead to me”, and that, you don’t just fix that by ignoring it.
Now this is more my own take as a Destiel shipper, but to me, that was a classic hurtful breakup scene. Cas says it’s time to move on, Dean doesn’t stop him from leaving (he definitely should’ve), but when Cas actually walks away, Dean can’t help but looking up at him leaving, and I think at that moment he KNOWS he fucked up. So whatever the writers do with that, it’s up to them. But I don’t see a way for them to reconcile without Dean going after Cas and apologising and winning him back. Cas deserves that much.
And finally, there’s the Sam in all this. He’s dealing with his own issues, but he loves Cas, he hasn’t been mad with Cas like Dean has. Sam has always been more rational in times like these, and I feel like he will - or at least he should - have a lot to say about Cas leaving, about Dean letting Cas leave. I guess we’ll see how this works out.
Wow literally thanks for coming to my ted talk this has been a giant essay, I’m sorry I put you through this.
TL;DR: I understand where Dean’s coming from, I don’t agree with it and he’s being an asshole to Cas, who doesn’t deserve it. He gotta chase after Cas and make it right.
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