The worst of hospitality.... in Haiku

Because bitching isn't enough, we also need HAIKU!

[writeonthrough]

Transforming into their best selves…four Oreos away from Heaven.

Bonus:

[mockwa]

[assgod]

oMg????????

[wintersmitth]

[hannahhillam]

[starsberrisnunicorns]

Did the cat just give–

[c-bassmeow]

Cats actually can tell babies are little humans and as a general rule of thumb they tend to go easier on babies and will tolerate more behaviors they usually do not tolerate in adults. Not only that but many cats can become overprotective of babies and show them a lot of affection. Or if they hate babies they will just hide and run away instead of attacking. Obviously exceptions exist, but I find this proclivity to be so heartwarming

[ddrvbiblgigb]

[garfield-baybee]

Reblog to have something good happen at 1:42 tomorrow

[shawskankredemption]

The Bill (1984-2010) an underrated important cultural touchstone. don’t @ me unless u got to watch both tuesdays and sundays at 8.30pm

[craphospitalityhaikus]

Dude, I need to rewatch the Eddie Santini arc again. Can we have a Bill party?

[suprematits]

you can say “i hate cats” and people would just assume you simply do not fancy cats or maybe favor dogs better but you literally cannot say “i hate dogs” or you will be burned at the stake as you should be

[craphospitalityhaikus]

I was with my friends and met a cute boy who I liked. I mentioned I was a cat person and not that fond of dogs, and soon everyone was chanting that I was a puppy killer who deliberately ran dogs down.

[shawskankredemption]

I used to work at bakers delight and Charlie Pickering came into my store and asked for one (1) white bap roll but pronounced it as 'barp' and i think about this every day

this is the best ask i have ever received. i am crying. a barp. barp. when i worked at bakers delight lygon st (THE WORST ONE) bill shorten came in and got a blueberry danish once. not so in touch with the common man are ya now shorto, that’ll be $3.80 please

[craphospitalityhaikus]

The day or week before Charlie Pickering got married, he was begging a friend of mine for sex.

I hate him on principle now.

[shawskankredemption]

whenever i see actor Billy Magnussen in anything I feel an inordinate sense of joy because he is a Nice Boy Who Has Done Well. I met him outside a theatre in NYC after he’d just appeared in a 2 person play with Anna Gunn and he came out and took time to shake hands and chat to all ten or so of us waiting for Anna. Asked us where we were from, how we were enjoying NYC. Thanked us so much for seeing the show. Signed playbills. Was so genuinely charming! What a fella. He’s also a very good actor but I especially like Kind People Going Far In Life. he deserves it. you’ve got a fan in me old Billy

[craphospitalityhaikus]

Oh, I love him so much! I’m so glad he is a nice person :D

[grimelords]

it’s insane that there’s multiple instances in history of people getting so riled up at an orchestral performance that they start a riot. how are you gonna get THAT buckwild about violins. how do you show up to work on monday when there’s a picture of you in the paper trying to decapitate a cellist cause he was being too cutting edge for you.

[shawskankredemption]

have you ever been to the symphony?? that shit goes OFF!!! Electrifying!!! except ya gotta try not to be the country rube who claps at the end of a movement

[craphospitalityhaikus]

I went to the Opera and a woman started clicking her fingers during an aria. There were a lot of angry glares. (Opera: Les contes d'Hoffmann and the aria was Les oiseaux dans la charmille)

[roy-kent]

this cold open is a masterpiece

[leaper182]

I’ve never seen Brooklyn Nine-Nine before, but I love this cold open.

[cutepetplanet]

A polar bear cub discovering the joy of bubbles

[kassandraaaaa]

Oh my gosh baby

[artoo-detoos]

Star Wars + Heights

[craphospitalityhaikus]

ISn’t CArrie Fisher 5′2? And Harrison Ford 6″2′? @shawskankredemption I NEED YOU!

[elise-bauman]

i’m one of those annoying people who’s always like “omg i know that actor from somewhere omg i recognize them whAT WERE THEY IN” when watching tv shows/movies who then proceeds to look it up on their phone and inform everyone that said actor was an extra in an episode of some stupid 90s sitcom once

[awesomevines]

[iwishihadafather]

First of all how fucking dare u

[wwinterweb]

The Best Cat Tweets of 2016 (see 23 more)

[isteadybouquetrunaway]

[hello-hereismylife]

How cute are these coats and capes?

Rabbit // Rabbit Ear //  Embroidery

Rabbit // Cat // Giraffe

Cat Ear // Deer // Color block

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[catsbeaversandducks]

Sinbad The Survivor

“Our Humane Investigators got a call about a cat living with an elderly gentleman that looked like it was “dragging a carpet.” The gentleman wasn’t able to care for himself, so it shouldn’t have come as a surprise that Sinbad would look like this. Still it was tragic on many levels. Despite his condition, Sinbad was friendly and tolerant, especially as shelter workers took on the monumental task of shaving what was several years of accumulated matted fur. It took hours, but the little guy was a champ. His back legs were atrophied from the lack of use, but he still soldiered on. Now he’s getting lots of TLC and attention. His diet is being monitored and the goal is to help Sinbad gain weight and grow back his glorious coat!”

“I’m not grumpy. Honest!” (Sinbad the Cat)

Photos by Josie Nibbling and Elliott Serrano Text by Elliott Serrano