“I see the love in your eyes, the passion in your heart…” I read from an old journal. I flung a strand of hair from my eyes. If only I could have spoken those words to him and show him how much I cared for him. But I couldn’t. My thoughts were filled with his face, his beautiful face. But I would never know the taste of his lips or the touch of his skin; he had given him self to someone else, and my chance was gone. I thought of all the times he laughed and the perfect way he said my name, as I turned the keys in the ignition of my car. I wished there was a way I could have gotten to him before he gave up on me. I should have said something before he didn’t want to be mine. Driving down the streets we used to walk I stopped by the flower shop and purchased a bouquet of daises as he had once done for me. I knew this wouldn’t change a thing, but I did it anyway. I listened to our song as I drove to where he stayed. I bit back the stinging tears in my eyes. This was going to be harder than anything. But it needed done, an apology needed to be made. I wished everyday I could have him back, walking me to classes across the campus, and back to my dorm to study. But it wasn’t like that anymore. I remember the moment when we met, and I knew he was who I wanted to spend my life with. But he chose someone else. I parked my car. I should have seen it in his eyes, it would’ve caused a lot less pain if I would have known he didn’t want me anymore. Every morning I would lay in bed and wish there was a way I could have shown him that I loved him, that it wasn’t just a game. I walked a cement path through the grass and stopped. This is what he was now. And it was my fault. I laid my flowers down on the ground and put my hand on top of the cold slab of cement. “ I’m sorry I couldn’t get to you, butI promise I won’t give myself away to Death like you did, no matter how tempting she seems.”
E.K.