tell me im pretty

my name is

[everythingfox]

Baby bear catching snowflakes

[clubsdeuce]

please don’t cosplay at school

[disubiquity-deactivated20180103]

[weirdmageddon]

[sesh]

[spiroandthelacktones]

Why does the music behind this make it sound like a conversation happening in Skyrim

[portentsofwoe2]

because its music from oblivion (prequel to skyrim)

[raulassparza-deactivated2015092]

[theweirdwideweb]

[orchidvioletindigo]

[sycamoretree]

trinity 

[yawning-caverns]

An Actual Real Person my Dad knew. Pretty sure he worked as a bush guide. When someone asked the time he’d pull off his hat - some kind of broad brim - and use to take a few measurements of the sun’s position relative to the horizon. Then he’d declare the time.

He was accurate to the minute.

[elodieunderglass]

Fvvdvddsfdssdhnvfh you get back here and say this to the rest of the crew

[monicareyes]

[msj70]

when I say “be safe” I say that shit from the bottom of my heart

[kvrs-deactivated20220420]

do not fix your dark circles let the world know youre tired of its shit and ready to kill a man

[lord-tengen]

you’re* it’s* Btw. I am a man.

[kvrs-deactivated20220420]

oooooooooooooh my gooooooooooooooooooooooood ooooooooh my god. oh my god. ooooooooooh. my god oh my god

[scaredenglishmajor]

If anyone deserves a raise it’s the employee from four seasons total landscaping who answered the phone and went “yup, we can set up a podium and everything” and just acted like nothing was out of the ordinary.

[nerdymouse]

[andwhatexcellentboiledpotatoes]

I do like that this pandemic has got us all greeting each other like Jane Austen characters- “You are well, I hope? And your family? All in good health?”

[badfey]

if she's your girl why is she shocking me like an electric eel

[forever-dirty-minded-deact]

Let me be your:

7am morning fuck before you go to work

Midday text, letting you know that you’re on my mind

5pm cuddle after a long days work

11pm rough fuck as i pound away the frustrations of your day

2am soft whisper in your ear, as i tell you “i love you”

[sovietshopaholic]

bro why the fuck am i only getting 5 hours of sleep

[beyoursledgehammer]

That's the lasting cultural legacy of Sherlock, it's everyone going fuck you Sherlock I'm not drunk the charging cable hole on my cellphone is just VERY SMALL

[lmaonade]

make no mistake not only am i party rocking but i’m also in the house tonight 

[umbranviking]

Are you shuffling?

[lmaonade]

everyday. 

[vodcar]

country gnomes,

take my bones

[cryptidfuckery]

to a place,

they don't belong

[annabellioncourt]

see shit like this is the reason that it’s so hard to turn my back on this website. Where else, pray tell, are you going to find this kind of quality nonsense.

[druggeddraccus]

west virginia

[goddamnitkastle]

[ladyartemesia]