"Just a moment!"
C'rrahsa burst out the front door carrying a package wrapped in brown paper. "Sorry, but can we drop off this parcel on our way?"
"Only if you spill the tea," challenged Purrh playfully. "Is it personal? Who's it for?"
"It's for my kitten niece. Well, I guess it's for my sister, but my niece'll grow into it. It's a storybook."
"Oh, that's a lovely gift!" The swordarm beamed as they headed down Ul'dah's broad street. "What book is it?"
"It's The Boy and the Dragon Gay. We didn't have it. Did you read books when you were a kit?"
"All the time! Oh gods." Purrh's ears were turned toward the older woman as they walked. "My sisters made fun of me for not wanting to outgrow them, but I found them so inspiring. In fact, uh, this might sound kinda silly, but it was my favourite book that made me want to be a-- well, that made me want to learn the blade."
"Oh, we were the book family in town!" C'rrahsa's voice was backed by a light purr. "So what is your favourite? Maybe I know it."
"The Dark Knight Who--"
"--Who Became A Paladin!" The two miqo'te finished the title in unison.
"I love that one!" enthused C'rrahsa. "I thought the summoner was the coolest ever. I wanted to be just like her, back then. Of course--" She pawed at the back of her head, smoothing her hair futilely, as the ends of the waves popped back out again. "I don't really mean I want to summon-- you know-- that didn't come out right-"
"Yeah," said Purrh, laughing nervously. They were, after all, on their way to stop a real summoning of a real primal, and put its instigators to the sword as per Scion law. "I know what you meant. Anyway, didn't she have black magic too?"
"She did!" C'rrahsa chirped. "So I did become like her, in a way."
"Yes!"
"And you became a free paladin, didn't you?" The black mage nodded towards her companion.
"Well… I did." Purrh hedged. "Something about it feels like it's different. I mean, I didn't have to climb a sacred mountain that no one has ever returned from alive. I didn't even have to throw away my dignity to apologize for anything, let alone risk my life, my upbringing, everything that's ever meant anything-- I didn't have to lose a thing. I didn't have to change. I doubt I became any better."
"Oh, so that's what you really wanted from being a paladin?"
"Yes!" The younger cat hissed the word, pulling back her lips to expose her long fangs. "I wasn't looking for a sword technique to impress anyone or win glory or fortune, I-- just wanted to devote myself to something amazing. I didn't even get invited to train for the Sultansworn like I'd hoped. And that wasn't even a great enough thing, just protecting someone passively day in and day out. I just don't know of anything better-- anything that really deserves my devotion."
C'rrahsa darted a quick, searching glance at her. "Is that why you got mixed in with the Lambs of Dalamud?" she asked softly. "Because you needed a cause?"
"No, not really," whined Purrh. "That was more a family thing. The Lambs never seemed to have a purpose worth fighting for at all. They were just so negative about everything. Traditional Menphina worship is more celebratory than that. But still no concrete purpose except for mothering, and I hate just passing the duty of living down to the next generation without doing anything for it."
"The mommy club," agreed C'rrahsa. "It's an easy solution to purpose. If you don't do anything yourself, maybe your real destiny is to raise the future doers."
"But it's just breaking even," Purrh wailed. "It's the giving-up solution. And giving up is the one thing I can't do. Cecil would never, ever give up. It's too important. He let it break him as a person, his identity, his pride, and all, before he would ever stop trying to do the right thing, that he had to do because nobody else could get it done. That's the kind of thing I want to accomplish, to do something that takes that much. Something so big that I have to pay everything that I am in order to stand behind my cause."
Abruptly the black mage stopped walking. "Did you hear
something?"
"Something kind of like the sky screaming?"
"Falling stars," said C'rrahsa abruptly. "Just now. I saw them."
"Is that what they are? They looked like little Dalamuds… I saw it too."
"That felt so strange… Ah, what were we talking about, again?"
"I don't know. I don't remember." Though against her own words, Purrh pointed at the parcel C'rrahsa was carrying. "Your book, I think?"
"Yes!" C'rrahsa jogged the parcel in her arm. "We never had this one when I was growing up. I'm pretty sure my sister will be glad to get to read it herself, to be honest, even if she will also pretend she no longer reads kitten fantasies because she likes to sound like a serious hunter. But I think she'll be even gladder to have it for her kittens and pass it down."
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