Don't feed the Destroyer

Borderlands theories. This blog is run by an infinite improbability drive. Feel free to ask/submit stuff I love reading them. If I don't answer right away, its bc I probably forgot so feel free to shoot me a message! My main blog is @dbphantom, I always reply from there. DelusionPhantom on Reddit. My SHIFT name is CruddyBLT.

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

Nooo you cant pin reblogs what the shit. Here's a link to the ask about the Google drive with the audio in case anyone is looking for it!

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

i am going to be

INSUFFERABLE

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

the flynt brothers be like

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

i am just under 300 pages now. just got to carnivora. there is a dinosaur loose in the maintenance hallways. zane has a celebrity crush on terror. vaughn is teaching ava corporate tax fraud (he put on a tie over his abs). the twins are trying to rip each others' throats out every time they're alone together.

it's going great.

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

i am going to be

INSUFFERABLE

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

let me explain to you the plot of borderlands 4 (kidding. mostly)

tl;dr: the eridians are evil, or, worse, completely uncaring about the things going on in their little sandcastle. the guardians are salty bitches about it and need our help and/or are going to start slaughtering people and im gonna fuckING TAlk ABOUT IT mostly because i need to write this down bc its been bouncing around my head since the game (bl3, not 4. that’d be wild) came out. minor spoilers for Guns Love and Tentacles. mostly that side quest.

tl;dr: tl;dr: eridians bad, guardians mad, and we are caught in the middle of a war that’s about to go down between them. spoilers for GLaT

tl;dr: tl;dr: tl;dr: Fl4k was a warning. Spoilers.

Keep reading

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

i was right about the plot of bl4 and that theory was ultimately based on me saying guardians can possess people because i needed to explain why my blorbo got moonstruck in h2o au so that means that h2o au is canon too sorry you had to find out this way i will say my free will stealing guardian oc is better because she smells like mildew and moon dust <3 stupid ass ugly old baldie over here probably smells like mothballs and sweaty doorknobs. disgUSTING also the Driver is a much more fitting name for someone who possesses people than the Timekeeper and I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

was that a mother fucking H2O: Just Add Water reference????????

[beauclair]

I'll never forget what the Head Monk told me right before I left the Abbey: "Child, you have so much left to learn" he said. I imagine he would have continued speaking, had I not pulled the trigger.

[vaulthunterlands]

The BL3 Vault Hunters being some of, if not the only people alive that can read and understand Eridian is absolutely hilarious to me. Because like, imagine you're a researcher who's spent your whole life looking into deciphering the language and then here comes foxy grandpa, drunk off his ass, being guided in by the hot muscle mommy siren, the soldier who's drooling over said siren, and the murder robot/animal rights activist. How would you trust anything they said???? THEY'RE CHAOS

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8yHnscLwOY <- you were mentioned in this epicnng youtube video cruddy you're famous now

OMG thank you for letting me know, that's hysterical XD

Will be interested to see if he continues this series! I notice it's been about a month since he last updated it. There's a lot to cover in 3, from Krieg and Maya getting cut from Skywell-27, to Troy's entire fight + his cut lines actually getting proc'ed if you skip the cutscene fast enough, to the Architects and the pyramid Vault Key, to the twins having different ECHO profile pictures, to the final boss fight cutting NPCs like Lilith... And that's just 3. There's a ton of stuff for 2, too! Damn, maybe I should've been a YouTuber...

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

who put the oozing breeder in the mailbox

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

welcome (back) to junpai-7 🌞✌

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

Now that Trigun is suddenly super duper popular... Ahem ahem

Hello, new Trigun fans! Would you like some Borderlands x Trigun crossover art in this trying time (waiting for season 2)?

OK, so, actually the reason I reblogged this was I was thinking abt them while doing the dishes:

Space future sci-fy

Hellscape desert planet with wild west vibes

Questionably blonde

Keeps getting shot at by bandits

Very strong stance on killing

Silly goofy to hide the profound sad

Spiky hair

Hidden blade

Friends with a duo comprised of a short lady and a strong lady

Give themselves silly names

Likes to drink!!!

Flirtatious (well...)

Skin-tight body suits

Guns! Lots of them!

People keep trying to kill them

Villainous brother(s)

Was it any wonder I latched onto Zane as soon as he was introduced lmao

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

YEAH BABY WOOOOOOOO

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

do you by any chance still have the bl3 content from google drive? i was hoping to go through the vo files and i remember you having them all sorted into folders. i imagine they took up a TON of space though so understandable if you don't! thank you :D

i do!

i did take it down because of space, i needed the room for personal stuff. funnily enough it was about a week before you sent this lmao, i didn't expect anyone to still be interested! you've prompted me to reupload them to another, new, better drive that is solely for borderlands things!

it might take a bit.

the cut content and bl2 folders will also be added after this one goes up, they're pretty large too. i'll reblog this or something when they're ready for viewing :)

in the meantime, if you own the game and feel up to it, i made a guide for extracting the audio files- bc I never actually finished sorting all of them lmao. there may be more cut content in there that hasn't been found yet! i'll get around to sorting it all... eventually :p

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

@controlcoreangel here you go! the other two folders are still uploading, they should be available about 7-8 hours from now :) Enjoy!

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

Annnnd here's the borderlands 2 audio files + cut lines for fun. This one's my favorite, especially the cut story stuff. For example, originally we had beat up Fink for info on Lilith, which is why he's working for Moxxi later on in the circle of slaughter. Also, Brewster was actually the name of a bandit we would've fought. Stuff like that.

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

do you by any chance still have the bl3 content from google drive? i was hoping to go through the vo files and i remember you having them all sorted into folders. i imagine they took up a TON of space though so understandable if you don't! thank you :D

i do!

i did take it down because of space, i needed the room for personal stuff. funnily enough it was about a week before you sent this lmao, i didn't expect anyone to still be interested! you've prompted me to reupload them to another, new, better drive that is solely for borderlands things!

it might take a bit.

the cut content and bl2 folders will also be added after this one goes up, they're pretty large too. i'll reblog this or something when they're ready for viewing :)

in the meantime, if you own the game and feel up to it, i made a guide for extracting the audio files- bc I never actually finished sorting all of them lmao. there may be more cut content in there that hasn't been found yet! i'll get around to sorting it all... eventually :p

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

@controlcoreangel here you go! the other two folders are still uploading, they should be available about 7-8 hours from now :) Enjoy!

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

do you by any chance still have the bl3 content from google drive? i was hoping to go through the vo files and i remember you having them all sorted into folders. i imagine they took up a TON of space though so understandable if you don't! thank you :D

i do!

i did take it down because of space, i needed the room for personal stuff. funnily enough it was about a week before you sent this lmao, i didn't expect anyone to still be interested! you've prompted me to reupload them to another, new, better drive that is solely for borderlands things!

it might take a bit.

the cut content and bl2 folders will also be added after this one goes up, they're pretty large too. i'll reblog this or something when they're ready for viewing :)

in the meantime, if you own the game and feel up to it, i made a guide for extracting the audio files- bc I never actually finished sorting all of them lmao. there may be more cut content in there that hasn't been found yet! i'll get around to sorting it all... eventually :p