ᵛᵉⁿᵒᵐᵒᵘˢ ᵗʰⁱⁿᵍ.

cold         woman       .

[cssndrium-blog]

➝      sonnenstola  ┊  [  eugene  ]

“you know i won’t stop,” he shoots her a smirk, somewhat relieved that she finally seemed willing to fold even if only marginally. why she had such trouble cooperating, especially when he was in the picture, remains beyond him but eugene refuses to give up until he’s made a break through or is given an explanation.

“i just don’t see why it’s such a big deal that i back you up! for someone who wants to be part of the guard someday, you’re not great at this whole ‘teamwork’ thing.”

ouch   .   hit where it hurts   —   he always manages to do that   ,   weasel his way under her skin until she is bright  -  hot and angry   .   cassandra KNOWS he’s a good guy   —   decent   ,   relatively kind   .   if rapunzel loved him   ,   he couldn’t have been all bad   .

she knows this   .   fights with him anyway   ,   fights him anyway   .   teamwork was hard when you’ve always been alone   ,   something guttural like instinct curling around her heart as a PROTECTION   .   if no one is let IN   ,   no one gets out   .   easier   ,   that way   .

❛    and i just dont see why it’s such a BIG DEAL that you back me up   .   you KNOW i’d be fine   .    ❜   thrown over her shoulder as she walks   ,   as much of an invitation as he’ll get to follow   .      ❛    i’m fine with teamwork   .    ❜      grit out   ,      ❛    you just like to try and push every button i have   .    ❜

[briannathestrange]

[lifeinpoetry]

I am nowhere to be found in myself  because I am good at hiding.

Joshua Jennifer Espinoza, from “This Is a Poem About the Power of Positive Thinking,” There Should Be Flowers (via lifeinpoetry)

[cssndrium-blog]

i never have nightmares.

the lie smells like something burning   ,   chemicals and wood and ice   .   it smells like a boy left alone too long   ,   like sadness but not sadness   ,   something deeper   .   more tangible   .   like she could reach out and TOUCH   ,   if she tried   .

doesn’t   .   how do you PUSH a boy who looks like he may snap in half at the slightest of presses   ?   cassandra   ,   with her harsh hands   ,   her armor skin   —   she knew the feel of a blade better than a warm touch   .   how was she supposed to help a boy with big eyes   ,   rabbit  -  fast gaze   ,   like he didn’t know how to settle for too long   ?

❛    i do   ,   sometimes   .    ❜      the threads of a gentle smile   ,   like she’s trying to be open but doesn’t quite know how to get it right   .   like she’s trying to be as soft as she feels inside   ,   sometimes   ,   warm like a blossom before she plucks off the petals   ,   tucks them away   .      ❛    if you don’t   ,   that’s fine   ,   too   .   but i do   ,   sometimes   .    ❜      doesn’t say   ,   sometimes   ,   the nightmares were real   ,   are real   .   sometimes i am never enough   .   sometimes i am too much   .   sometimes everyone is dead and i am carrying the knife   .   sometimes everyone is dead and i couldn’t save them   .   sometimes i touch the darkness and it never leaves again   ,   even after i open my eyes   .

doesn’t say it   .   she knows when too much is too much   .      ❛    having nightmares doesn’t make you weak   .   you just have to try not to let them swallow you whole   .   they’re just   —   bad dreams   .    ❜

                                                                                                       // @oldcoronas !

[cssndrium-blog]

‘ there is no next. this was next. ’

❛    that’s really   —    ❜      a grunt   ,      ❛    helpful   .   you’re being really helpful right now   .    ❜      between hisses and a few popping sounds of her body against the door   ,   cassandra still manages to throw a quip back   .   she presses HEAVY against it   ,   all of her weight centralized   ,   keeping it closed despite the men on the other end aggressively pressing back   .   cassandra THUMPS with it   ,   feels it in her skull   ,   every time they push   .   she grits her teeth   .      ❛    then we need another next   .   what’s our THIRD next   ,   eugene   ,   because   —    ❜      a gasp   ,   they almost manage to throw her off   .      ❛    not sure how much longer i’ll hold out   ,   here   .    ❜

                                                                                                          // @sonnenstola !

[cssndrium-blog]

‘ they’re at the window talking in this sort of code. ’

grin is saber  -  tooth sharp   ,   lips red like blood   ,   a kind of predatory look to the whole of her   .   cassandra creeps low   ,   tugs rapunzel by the shoulder along with her   :   here   ,   adrenaline is a welcomed kick to the heart   ,   blood pumping quick and singing sweet in her veins   .   this was her idea of a good time   .      ❛    then i GUESS we just have to get closer   ,   mh   ?   we just need to take down whatever they’re saying   .   we can figure it out later   .    ❜

                                                                                                                 // @asundrop !

[vhsmeme]

* falling man starters

falling man is a novel by don delillo.

‘ he’s all right. ’

‘ but be careful. ’

‘ who knows how the kid is? ’

‘ they’re at the window talking in this sort of code. ’

‘ they were my things, not yours. ’

‘ i don’t know how my mind was working. ’

‘ but you were curious about the wrong things. ’

‘ i’m standing here. ’

‘ to feel dangerously alive. ’

‘ i didn’t know what to do. i mean with the phones out. ’

‘ walked, step by step, like walking a child. ’

‘ this isn’t the time. ’

‘ but you worry. i know this. ’

‘ the time to be afraid is when there’s no reason to be afraid. ’

‘ maybe you don’t want to hear this. ’

‘ why didn’t he go straight to the hospital? ’

‘ it has something to do with this man. ’

‘ i had to get out of there. ’

‘ like gray soot head to toe, i don’t know, like smoke, standing there with blood on his face and clothes. ’

‘ you have more to lose this time. ’

‘ what did i want? ’

‘ you like to nourish your fear. ’

‘ is this a bad time? ’

‘ but if you let your sympathy and goodwill affect your judgement… ’

‘ what’s next? don’t you ask yourself? ’  

‘ it was not possible, up from the dead, there he was in the doorway. ’

‘ too late now. ’

‘ i thought he was dead. ’

‘ there is no next. this was next. ’  

[cssndrium-blog]

’ I want to do something for her … but what ? ’

cassandra may be the wrong person to ask   ,   flounders for a second   .   he wants to do something   ,   nice   ,   cass assumes   .   she shrugs   .      ❛    i mean   ,   as long as you put effort into it   ,   shouldn’t that be enough   ?    ❜      brazen girl   ,   material things seemed so USELESS in the grand scheme of things   .

she did   ,   however   ,   love a good knife   .   

lips purse in thought   .      ❛    do something she likes   ,   though   .   that couldn’t hurt   .   do you know her favorite   —   drink   ?   book   ?  anything   ?     ❜      rapunzel would have a million ideas   ,   all of them no doubt FANTASTIC   .   cassandra almost grimaces   .       ❛    i think that’d be   —   nice   .    ❜

                                                                                                                         // @amulatlas !

[decision]

by Riris

[cssndrium-blog]

I’m mobile bound pls keep me company hewwo my discord is #lenkies7025

[cssndrium-blog]

’ Well, some people use their imagination… ’

❛    yeah well   ,   you keep using your imagination   ,   i’ll figure out a way to quickly get us out of here   .    ❜

                                                                                                             // @guitarpicked !

[cssndrium-blog]

I’m mobile bound pls keep me company hewwo my discord is #lenkies7025

[cssndrium-blog]

sonnenstola replied to your post: i have always been scared of you.

hI MY NAME IS AMANDA AND I WOULD LIKE TO REPORT A MURDER

[cssndrium-blog]

sonnenstola replied to your post: i’m. writing this meme reply for amanda and i just

me, cackling into the afternoon:

u’ll get what’s COMING FOR U, PUNK

[cssndrium-blog]

i have always been scared of you.

pain like a physical blow   ,   pain like a knife wound   ,   bleeding and hot and deep   ,   ache thrumming to the quickening beat of your heart   .   cheeks are red with surprise and hurt and cassandra doesn’t want to know what she looks like   .   doesn’t want to see the look on his face when he realizes she was hurthurthurt   ,   it hurts   .   

pain like something quick and fierce   .   a kill shot   .   for a moment   ,   cassandra’s mouth shakes   .

i have always been scared of you   ,   he says   ,   speaks it like the truth   .   speaks it like swearing an oath   ,   speaks it like you were never friends to begin with   .   does anyone ever like you   ,   girl   ?   can anybody ever put up with you for long   ?

i have always been scared of you   ,   he says   .   always   ,   constant   .   he has always been scared   .   cassandra wonders if the words are ever going to hollow   ,   not sound so LOUD in her ears   .   they threaten to leak from her ears   ,   leave her in the tremble of fingers   .

pain   ,   pain   .   tighten your fists   ,   girl   .   harden your heart   ,   girl   .   you made a mistake in ever letting it go unguarded   .

❛    i GOT IT   ,   eugene   .   loud and clear   .    ❜     it’s spit like poison   ,   what a venomous woman you are   ,   mh   ?   no wonder everyone’s afraid of you   .   no wonder eugene has always been afraid   .   cassandra could make it worse   ,   could nail the coffin shut   ,   could say   ,   you have more to fear   ,   eugene   .   fitting in   ,   being one of them   .   you can take the BOY from the crime but can you take the crime from the boy   ?

but she’s never wanted to hurt him   .   anybody   .   not really   ,   not fully   .   she   ,   cold and alone and hard   .   biting   .   full of poison   .   still soft   ,   somewhere   .   she’s never wanted to hurt anybody this badly so she doesn’t   .   turns away   ,   runs   ,   like she does   .      ❛    tell rapunzel i’ll be gone for a few days   .    ❜

                                                                                                         // @sonnenstola !

[cssndrium-blog]

i’m. writing this meme reply for amanda and i just

[cssndrium-blog]

➝      wistcrias  ┊  [  raven  ]

           “ Well, it wasn’t easy, sure, but at the end of the day I was like ––– I can’t have someone DICTATE my destiny for me. My friend, Madeline, daughter of the Madhatter –– y’know? from Alice in Wonderland? –– she thinks she can hear NARRATORS. And maybe she can but, I don’t know… I don’t BELIEVE in that stuff. I believe we all write our own destinies. ” Looking up from the captivating steam of her latte, Raven aims a SHEEPISH smile at Cassandra. “ Sorry. I get carried away when I’m PASSIONATE about something. I didn’t mean to PREACH. I just think we should all have a choice –– whether that’s following our stories, or choosing not to. ” 

&. @cssndrium from RAVEN. 

for a moment   ,   she is reminded of RAPUNZEL   ,   the animated way she speaks   ,   all fast and happy and full of passion   ,   every time she speaks   .   cassandra wonders how these girls don’t get tired like that   .

raven speaks and   ,   truthfully   ,   cass only HALF follows   ,   makes sense of every other word or so   .   just the bigger picture   .   her mug is WARM and darkdarkdark   ,   sip rich and bitter   .   something about choice   ,   destiny   ?   a friend of hers   .   cass doesn’t hum   ,   but she quirks a half  -  indulgent little smile   .      ❛    it’s fine   ,   i get it   .   we all make our own choices   .   never trying to change things makes you a coward   .    ❜      she doesn’t mean to be so harsh   .   tries again   .      ❛    if you stay still you never move   .   i guess   .    ❜