calem @cumformecal - Tumblr Blog

today my dad was like “hey honey are you mad at me?” and i was like ???? no?????? and he was like “oh okay, it’s just that you haven’t called me daddy in a long time and i was worried that i’d done something to upset you” because i used to only call him dad when i was annoyed and i was like…….oh

look what you did internet

you made the word daddy weird for me and now you’ve made my dad feel insecure

homosexualchronicles

oh my god

fonzworthcutlass

We eatin salty pussy in 2k17

montypythonandtheholyblog

today I learned that if you want to slash someone’s tires, don’t slash all four; only slash three because if you slash all four their insurance will pay for it but if you only slash three they have to pay for it all out of pocket

❤

dunhamsanddreamscapes

sadxfuzz-deactivated20141025

today on satan makes a blog post

mytinygayitalianson-deactivated

Life tip: if someone slashes 3 of your tires, slash the 4th one yourself and blame it on the person who slashed the first 3. Now, your insurance will pay for it.

clockworkjerk

Life tip: If you slash 3 of their tires, hide out nearby until they discover their slashed tires. Take pictures of them slashing their fourth tire. Show police when they arrive on scene. Convicted of insurance fraud and still have to pay for tires.