my current obession: Heated Rivalry @currentobsessionsblog - Tumblr Blog

it's starting to get blurry here

obsessed with ilya not knowing what autism is really (he didn’t exactly read the dsm5 while learning english) but he does know shane prefers lamps over the big light and making noise before 8am is a death sentence and sometimes shane can’t talk when he’s upset so ilya turns on an old hockey match and lets shane calm down alone while he’s in the other room and after games against montreal he lays on top of shane on the floor and presses his whole weight down and shane just kinda floats a little

trashcanniballecter

Shane: I was the one to make the first move

Ilya: that's not true! I did! In the shower!

Shane: I introduced myself to you at world juniors!

Ilya: that wasn't a move! That was normal introduction!

Shane: Ilya, baby, when have you ever known me to initiate a social interaction with a stranger?

Ilya: . . . Holy shit

mrmnn

let’s do some weird stuff

mulderscully

1.05 | 1.06

thisfeebleheart

Ilya during that scene

sheisraging

it was foretold

caralikesgay

ok this is mostly a collection of ilya "good top" rozanov headcanons that took on a life of their own

ilya's reputation as a "womanizer" and a "ladies man" takes hold pretty early in his career

he's got a girl in every port, the man's having a lot of sex everywhere

(most of his teammates know that he's got a special fondness for jane in montreal, but that's neither here nor there)

shane genuinely isn't jealous, what ilya does when they're apart isn't his business, as long as he has ilya's undivided attention when they're together, which he absolutely does

someone makes a joke on twitter that all of the women he's banged ought to start a club

this leads to someone making a shirt that says "i hooked up with ilya rozanov and all i got was this lousy t-shirt" and starts selling it on etsy. a bunch of other people make copycat shirts and variations

the fad fades pretty quickly, but there's a brief moment in time where they seem to be everywhere, and jane texts lily every time he sees someone wearing one out in the wild

lily mostly responds with laughing emoji, but one time he responds with "i think that one's real i remember her" and shane has to remind himself that he's not jealous and it's not his business and he has to delete the picture so he doesn't go back and study it

not long after boston wins the cup, a package arrives at shane's secret sex condo, it's a version of the shirt that says "i slept with STANLEY CUP WINNER ilya rozanov and all i got was this lousy t-shirt"

shane is mortified, but also more than a little turned on. at some point he wears it under his other clothes when he meets up with ilya for a hook-up and ilya goes absolutely feral when he sees it

years later, when the whole dallas kent situation hits the fan, people start taking to twitter talking shit about other NHL players (and other pro-athletes in general) who treated them poorly

someone tweets out "i've never really talked about this because i'm not one to kiss and tell and it's really no one's business, but i just want to say that in like 2014 i hooked up with ilya rozanov and he was the most considerate lover i'd ever had. i was relatively inexperienced and so down bad for him that i would have done anything he said, but he checked in with me every step of the way, and *also* gave me crazy orgasms to boot"

and women start coming out of the woodwork responding to the thread with similar sentiments, that he'd set the bar for future hookups and relationships

and people are like "damn, consent king ilya rozanov, didn't have that on my bingo card this year" and "this man was really fucking his way across north america as a service to *us* teaching millennial women to have higher standards for their partners"

someone tweets out "i hooked up with ilya rozanov and all i got was multiple orgasms and really high expectations about consent" and it goes stupid viral

several months later when the fanmail debacle happens and hollanov are outed, that particular corner of social media has another meltdown along the lines of "and he's even bisexual? this makes so much sense"

someone jokes about getting shane a shirt, since he's a member of the club, this tweet makes its way back to harris, who feels like he should warn shane and ilya

ilya posts a picture to instagram of his husband lounging, wearing The Shirt, his underwear, and nothing else. the shirt is very obviously not new, has been worn and washed many times

in the picture, shane's left hand is draped casually across his stomach, wedding ring glinting in the light, as if to remind everyone: this one's mine

thisfeebleheart

too much too good because it was the Shane Hollander that got on his knees for him

aheartofgold

OH when Shane says "we just want a future" you HAVE to look at Ilya's face, he gets this tiny smile that goes all the way to his eyes and you KNOW it's the first time he has ever ever heard himself and Shane referred to as "we" and he's losing it

martelldoran

with rachel reid saying that hollanov's forever argument being about driving, i fully believe that ilya is the one that does most of the driving in the relationship. he will get them where they need to go in the most efficient (fastest) way possible while shane gripes in the passenger seat every time he goes over the speed limit.

however! shane always always drives them to the cottage.

because he drove them there the first time.

so it doesn't matter that he's driving like a grandmother or that they make sensible scheduled stops because ilya gets to sit in the passenger seat with his fingers tangled together with his husband's on the gear stick and be thankful that his leap of faith paid off.

thisfeebleheart

the finger holding is so damn cute it deserves its own post

littlegirlinvisible

#freaks4freaks if you will

themathmusician

unpopular opinion but I think once Shane and Ilya are publicly out / married Ilya stops referring to Shane as the "second best player in the league". like sure, in private, he keeps up the bit and they playfully shit talk as always, but publicly Ilya is #1 Shane Hollander fanboy. he can't stop telling reporters that he is married to the "best player in the history of the NHL" and that his husband is the "greatest thing to ever happen to the sport". he's derailing every professional conversation to emphasize how amazing Shane is at the game. that man is hyping him up and NEVER implying that Shane is not as good at hockey as Ilya, not even as a joke, bc he refuses to let the world see Shane as anything other than The Greatest Of All Time

beehivedemocracy

I just saw a compilation of David Hollander moments and oh my frickin God bro. The way Shane is literally his whole world. Like every interaction Shane has 100% of his attention. And when Yuna (I love her don't get me wrong) tries making their lunches and what not about business and hockey, David is always trying to make it about spending time with Shane. Like him pulling the conversation from hockey back to the YouTube rabbit hole so much because it makes Shane smile and think about something other than his job for a minute. And Yuna trying to pitch going to London for a brand thing and when David sees Shane clearly doesn't want to he makes it sound like a vacation and focuses on them spending time together and it ALMOST gets Shane. And David noticing when Shane is already upset and tries to ask for his safe food and the fancy ass restaurant doesn't have it. He doesn't do anything but notices and takes stock of that and knows what that means to Shane even if it seems small. And him being the first one to notice Shane having a panic attack at the dinner table. He doesn't even tell his wife when he finds out about him and Ilya and even lies to try and cover for them. Shane is his baby and we don't talk about how amazing he is enough