g @cutest-glassesthing - Tumblr Blog

Tragic: all plans to "wake up early and be more productive" ruined by the need for a "nap" (12pm-18pm)

yamada-ryo

who up slopping their hogs

pocket-deer-belly

maybe one of the worst things you can do to a potential trans ally is peg them as Definitively Cisgender

pocket-deer-belly

tme people when they see a "man" express clear interest in femininity and constantly "ironically" engaging with femininity and girlyness: wow you're such a cool ally for a cis man, it's cool that even though you're a cis man you're really open about this stuff, you don't have to be trans to enjoy femininity, it's cool that you're a boy who likes girl stuff (but i'd like to implicitly maintain a boundary between you and transfemininity, cause like, that's not you, right? you're a cis man.)

crazysodomite

Hello, my name is The biggest, fattest, yuckiest fly you have ever seen.

I NEED to sit on you and tickle you with my little legs. I NEED to be really loud and annoying. I NEED to sit on your body instead of literally anything else in your room. I NEED to put my yucky tongue on any food or drink you're having.

And I'm big and fat, and yucky too.

cutest-glassesthing

Funny thing about being a computer science student is every now and then your professors will advertise you a company you can work at for a high salary and then I'll google the company for like two seconds and every result says something along the lines of "It's a scam, don't work there. Also they're like super evil"

cutest-glassesthing

And of course every job listing is super vague and shady like "we develop intelligent solutions for dynamic systems" so you have to go digging to figure out if it's a pretty regular webdev job or if you're dealing with, like, an arms manufacturer

Funny thing about being a computer science student is every now and then your professors will advertise you a company you can work at for a high salary and then I'll google the company for like two seconds and every result says something along the lines of "It's a scam, don't work there. Also they're like super evil"

divorce-enjoyer

ice water is awesome because you get more water in your water

divorce-enjoyer

you think youre out of water but then you check back in five minutes and woah! theres more water! the world is so beautiful

inthefallofasparrow

synthetic-ultramarine

don't go on indeed dot com at 2am they start showing you the job listings for gnomes and talking squirrels

juniepuppie

strong contender for the funniest gag in onimai tbh

owa-tagoo-siam

kunosoura

I know it feels good as fuck to cast spells from up there

bippus

when i was born they rushed all the nurses into the room. called the whole hospital. Here’s the baby that doesn’t cry they said

sagehole

we love to applaud performative masculinity

bippus

I was a stoic

redstonedust

had a dream i walked up to a food stall and they tried to sell me 3 takoyaki for $130 and i was so mad that i woke myself up before completing the transaction. idiot lost their customer to the waking world lol. charge less next time.