cannibalism is pretty sexy ngl

kitscho || he/him || shaped like my balls havent dropped yet, but i will bite ur arm off || bring peace offerings

[dogpuppy]

[themysteriousmurasamecastle]

hey.. two people were asking about you… so i gave them your address and phone number… their names were Skeletal Warrior and Skeletal Ice Mage

[hailingonhismarytilimfullofgrace]

"Stratt didn't care about Grace, she only kept him around because he was the tertiary science officer!"

[twinktorturer]

the most sexual emotion a man can feel is fear

[browsingfreakshit]

Now why would Tumblr user twinktorturer say something like this

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[themurderscene-deactivated20140]

and if you turn to ur left you’ll see the emos

[rnyselfie]

is that my chemical romance?

[penceyprepster-deactivated20160]

OH MY GOD not every group of emos is my chemical romance stfu tumblr

[chxmical-rxmance]

but it actually is my chemical romance

[losered]

this is the funniest fuckibg thing I’ve ever seen

[gay-emo-quotes]

I’ve…. seen this everywhere except on Tumblr itself. It’s the blessed post.

[aquaticfreak]

yet again I feel like a fuckin archeologist on this site

[egberts]

*shagcula voice* it vasn't me

[egberts]

she caught me in the coffin. vasnt me

caught me hanging in the belfry. vasnt me.

she even saw me stick my cross in. vasnt me

i didn't show up on camera. vasnt me

[macklesufficient]

[konoko]

[narutwitter]

[vrabia]

today i learned that the finnish word for ‘hazardous waste’ is ongelmajäte, which can also translate as ‘problematic garbage’ and my roommate and i immediately agreed this is a word that belongs on tumblr.

[callmebliss]

Your fave is ongelmajäte

[you-had-me-at-e-flat-major]

in german it’s Sondermüll which means special trash and that too belongs on tumblr

[pyrebomb]

One man’s ongelmajäte is another man’s sondermüll.

[freshwaterduck]

[musings-of-a-crazed-musician]

reblogging this with the addition of my favorite comment on the post

[evilnicegirl]

this would have got 100k notes as a tumblr post in 2018

[sforzzz]

it's totally ok to dislike things. right?

[sforzzz]

i have to go delete some posts

[dragon-png]

nodding my head to show that i approve of all the shitty things this character has done because i'm a bad person

[beesmygod]

i read this to adam and he just yelled, outraged, "THEYRE BABIES"

[wonderhecko]

TRUE HATERS, SINCE DAY 1 THEY HAVENT BEEN GIVING THEM A FUCKING INCH

[beesmygod]

this is next level

[wonderhecko]

20 years later. you're kermit. opening night at the muppet theater. you look up. you can't believe it. those two awful cunts from next door are here. neither of them died yet. they're going to be here, forever.

[charlesoberonn]

They're immortal.

They were heckling the actors in Ford's theater on the day Lincoln was shot.

They heckled the first reading of the Epic of Gilgamesh.

They heckled the first lifeform to crawl onto land.

They heckled the big bang.

[charlesoberonn]

"They say that time exists now."

"I can tell."

"How so?"

"Because this show is a waste of it!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHO!"

[epicsause-official]

on sharing one's opinons

[vulpine-dyke]

As a chronic "good heavens" sayer, and as a casual rhyme enjoyer, it's been really hard not to pepper in the phrase "good heavens six sevens" into my vocabulary. It would be so much fun to say, but it would immediately alienate both young hip people and old antiquated people and really only be enjoyed by whimsically autistic transgender women, so yeah :/