Dissonance

[darthcalculus]

What Kind of God

https://soundcloud.com/user-164597928/what-kind-of-god

Christopher Hitchens described life under God as a kind of “celestial North Korea.” Every word spoken about the supreme leader must be favorable; every action is watched, every word listened to, every thought scanned. The punishment for any insubordination is death. Even if God existed, he argued, he would never submit to such a petty, evil autocrat.

The problem of evil can be answered, but it’s unsatisfactory unless you trust God’s goodness. Jesus can enter into our suffering, but scoffers think God's plan is foolish. There are some who hunger for answers; there are others who, after hearing the answer, lose their appetite.

I'll never bend the knee to someone so unworthy If you're real at all You watched us suffering, unable or unwilling To intercede when we call What kind of God are you?

The music is from “Why,” the antitheist protest against God; the melody is from “The Prayer.” In this context, the unbeliever is no longer skeptical; he is blasphemous. This person does not want to be saved. The question “what kind of God are you?” is not asked in earnest. Rather, it is an attack on God’s character.

I watched your heart descending into blackness And I held, held my hand I watched you drive the nails with jealousy and malice And I held, held my hand What kind of God am I? What kind of God am I?

“I held my hand” means “I restrained my justice,” but when they crucified Him, He held his hand for them to mutilate. After everything - after facing the problem of evil, after contemplating the incarnation and the Gospel, it comes down to God himself. Is He a heartless monster? A despot unworthy of respect or worship?

I let you live the moment You made yourself a god I'll offer you atonement And pay in my own blood You've tasted life without me But I have shared your pain I am the Lord Almighty There is no other name

This is God’s last statement in The Moral Argument. He extends mercy (“I let you live...”), grace (“I’ll offer you...and pay...”), and compassion (“I have shared your pain”). But last of all, He declares his sovereignty. To those that submit to Him, His mercy, grace, and compassion are overwhelming. 

What kind of a god Would hang on a cross And suffer and die Light of the world, by darkness slain

The Moral Argument closes in a positive reflection of the way the first act closed. “Why” ended with an indictment of God’s moral negligence; “What Kind of God” ends in a celebration of His goodness. The last lyrics are taken from “In Christ Alone.”

The musical style of this song is unfortunately borne out of my incompetence to accomplish my original vision. The composition did not match my interpretation of the style. I ended up rediscovering Circle of Dust while searching for inspiration and managed to satisfactorily adapt the song into a more industrial sound. The feeling of “Get Out” carries over for after the segue, including the high guitar part. With the musical elements of “Why” and “The Prayer,” this song is the most reference-heavy one.

I don’t personally like the gang vocals at the end, yet...I feel artistically it was the best choice. It’s very strange; it feels like the song itself required something that I didn’t want, but I was obligated to serve the song. Hopefully I made the right choice.

[darthcalculus]

Get Out

https://soundcloud.com/user-164597928/get-out

In”Get Out,” God calls out to us to be saved.

Made you from clay, I gave you breath I showed you life, but you chose death What have you done, what have you done? Just as I said, there will be blood I don't want to crush my children But a judge must be just You cannot stand before my face You need to leave, it isn't safe

Get out, get out

“Just as I said, there will be blood” can refer to God’s promise in Genesis 2:17 that “In the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.” However, this phrase refers equally well to the Messianic promise in Genesis 3:15. “There will be blood” does not specify whose blood it will be.

“You need to leave, it isn’t safe” spoken to sinners is an act of unparalleled mercy. God is putting distance between His children and their rightful judgment.

The chorus is a direct reference to “Drops Out.”

You made yourself my enemy But I'm not done with you, listen to me If you love the dark, then you’re not mine But if you love The Light, then there’s still time Won't crush the head of the serpent While you're still in his jaws I'll put my foot upon the ground He'll sink his teeth, I'm going down

Get out, get out

As I was writing this, I wanted to make it agreeable to multiple soteriologies. I hope that I succeeded - if you’ll kindly interpret this verse with some artistic grace.

I picture a fallen world under the dominion of a great snake, with humanity at its mercy, in its jaws. If God were to crush its head, then He would also destroy the people in its mouth. So, Jesus presents himself as a target for the enemy’s venom, giving His children an opportunity to escape. The phrase “put my foot upon the ground” refers literally to inhabiting a physical body, but in a way that makes you vulnerable to a snake bite.

Can't abide Rebellion Won't give up My children

Broke the law Pay with blood If you pay Gone for good

I will bleed Blood of men I will rise Live again

Paid in full Bend the knee You will rise Up with me

This is the Gospel. God must punish sin, but it is unacceptable to Him that He lose His children. He takes a human body to become like on of us, bleeds human blood, and rises again, promising we can join Him.

[darthcalculus]

When Everything Was New

https://soundcloud.com/user-164597928/when-everything-was-new

So far in The Moral Argument, we’ve let secular humanism take the stage (If This Is All There Is) and exposed its flaws (Drops Out); then, we’ve let atheism draw first blood (Why). Then, Jesus enters our suffering (The Prayer) and asserts his Lordship (The Trial). Finally, His followers are devastated by His death and amazed at His resurrection (Gone).

We haven’t answered the burning question yet - why is there suffering? What kind of a God creates a world with so much pain? Even though it’s comforting to know God has endured pain on our behalf, it doesn’t answer the question of why there’s suffering in the first place. Why didn’t God create a world in which there was no suffering or sin?

To answer this, I ask you to consider the end of God’s story. At the conclusion of the Bible, heaven is populated with redeemed sinners who love God not out of necessity or ignorance, but with a genuine and thankful heart. If man did not fall in Eden and there was no redemption, the world would be populated with people like Adam and Eve - naked, innocent...children.

There is nothing in principle wrong with an untested love; however, that humanity’s love for God failed at the first test is an indication to us that there is a qualitative difference between the love of the innocent and the love of the redeemed. God valued that difference so highly that He bled for it.

The implications are enormous. God intentionally created a world that would turn against Him for the few that would turn back, and He proved this was not a callous choice by joining in the suffering.

When everything was new You used to walk with me I gave this gift to you Eternity

But when some time had passed You hear another voice When I'm not all you have You make another choice

But did you love me? Was it for real? Why was your heart so easy to steal? Because you gave it away

The music is a direct reference to “If This Is All There Is,” except from the opposite perspective; that was sung from the perspective of people who rejected God, but this is from a God rejected by people.

[darthcalculus]

Gone

https://soundcloud.com/user-164597928/gone

The loss the disciples must have felt when Jesus was crucified must have been overwhelming. They had lost their friend, their leader, and their hope. They had left their families and their livelihoods to follow this man who was suddenly taken from them.

“Gone” picks up with the followers of Jesus, broken-hearted and lost, losing their faith. They begin to sound like the world without God in their desperation in lyrics from “Why” and “If This Is All There Is.”

The irony is, they mourned that he was gone...and a few days later, “he’s gone” takes on a whole new meaning.

He hangs his head In silence rests A man is dead Grant my request

Can I take him down Put him in the ground And bury him Put him in a tomb And wrap his wounds In linen

He's gone, he's gone

What have we done? We hoped that he Would be the one To set us free

All your promises What the scripture says For so long, we waited For David's son The anointed one Oh, were we mistaken?

But now, he's gone, he's gone

What kind of a god Would watch, with arms crossed As we suffer and die What kind of a fraud You promised us life Well, you promised a lie

If this is all there is If this is all we have It's time to face a new day We’ll do this on our own This is our only home We're going to do it our way

Because he's gone, he's gone

He's gone, he's gone!

[darthcalculus]

The Trial

https://soundcloud.com/user-164597928/the-trial

The purpose of a trial is to establish guilt in the presence of witnesses so that a verdict may be pronounced and a sentence given. In an amazing irony, the trial of Jesus established our guilt beyond a reasonable doubt to any witness, only to have the sentence carried out in the most unexpected way imaginable.

God created man in his image; man fell into sin and tarnished the image. Jesus, the image of the invisible God (Colossians 1:15), utterly exposed our failure by carrying out that duty in utter perfection.

Just as evidence is presented to establish guilt, Jesus presents three pieces of evidence to condemn us, followed by a declaration intentionally left ambiguous as to who is speaking:

Exhibit A: Priest

The function of a priest is to represent God to the people, and to represent the people to God. Jesus was illegally put on trial by evil men serving their own interests, rather than representing God.

You come to take me like a thief (Luke 22:52) When every day I came to teach (Luke 22:53) No one would dare arrest me in the light of day But it had to be this way (Mark 14:49)

The liars come and testify (Mark 14:56) But I don't answer to their lies  Tell us, are you the Son of God, are you the Christ? (Mark 14:61) You'll see me coming on the clouds on my father's right (Mark 14:62)

I am a priest (Hebrews 7:17) I speak the word of God, and now it seems that you forgot your place (John 18:22, John 6:68) I am a priest It's better for one to die, the wrath to satisfy, then to lose the human race (John 11:50, 1 Peter 3:18)

God gave us the purpose of representing Him on Earth as his image-bearers. We cling to that title in vain next to Jesus, who holds it without challenge.

Exhibit B: King

A king is to rule, to protect and cultivate, to enforce law and do justice. Man was given dominion over creation (Genesis 1:28). Jesus was put on trial by Pontius Pilate, the civil authority in the area. He was subject to manipulation by accusations of disloyalty (John 19:12); though he knew Jesus was innocent, he consented to execute him to appease a mob (John 19:16); in the end, a compromised leader knowingly executed an innocent man because of a kingdom he could not control. Contrast this with Jesus, who dominated each interrogation with total composure and self-control. The all-powerful restrains his might as his creatures beat him; the self-existent sovereign deigns to be subject to corrupt courts.

They say you are king of the Jews (John 18:33)  Why don't your people follow you? (John 18:35) My kingdom isn't of the world that you can see (John 18:36) They hear the truth that follow me (John 18:37)

The crowd will not be satisfied Until they see you crucified (John 19:6) I cannot find a reason to condemn this man (John 19:4) Then let his blood be on our hands (Matthew 27:25)

I am a king (Revelation 19:16) Life and death are mine to give or to deprive, now answer me (John 19:10, Job 1:21) I am a king Why don't you understand, the power is in my hand for your release (John 19:10, Mark 2:10)

An agent of one of history’s greatest empires fails to free an innocent man through a combination of expedience and manipulation, while the authority and dignity of the creator is trampled for show. Men heap up judgment for themselves, taunting the judge.

Exhibit C: Man

God made man in His image, yet he made him man. Jesus not only succeeds where we fail to manifest God’s image, but he is perfect in his love for his neighbor. This is best demonstrated by contrasting him with three major failings on his last day: the betrayal by Judas, the abandonment by the disciples, and the denial of Peter. Judas sells out his rabbi for selfish gain; Jesus gives himself up for all. The disciples flee when Jesus is arrested; Jesus is a friend that sticks closer than a brother. (Proverbs 18:24) Peter does not want to be associated with Jesus on trial, (Hebrews 2:11) but Jesus carries out a tremendous act of faithfulness. (John 15:13)

I am a man (Daniel 7:13) Now the time has come to do what must be done, it's time to stand (John 18:5) I am a man (Luke 2:7) You see my blood is red, it's pouring from my head and from my hands (John 19:18)

I am a priest I've come to give you rest, your sins far as the West is from the East (Psalm 103:12) I am a king I'll deal the fatal blow, and then they all will know this single thing: The cup is poured, I am the Lord! (1 Corinthians 15:26, Psalm 75:8)

Closing Argument

There is no more dramatic way for Jesus to demonstrate our guilt than by having us incriminate ourselves upon him. Our priests fail to serve God; our kings fail to observe justice; as people we fail each other. Jesus has accomplished all these in direct opposition to our failure. Then, just as he would be in a position to execute a sentence...he does.

[darthcalculus]

The Prayer

https://soundcloud.com/user-164597928/the-prayer

At the heart of The Moral Argument is the answer to the question “Why?”

I found I was incapable of giving an answer; I could only ask a question in return. It is a question that first captured me when I heard John Lennox ask it:

“The question I ask is: granted that this is so, is there anywhere evidence of the existence of a God whom I can trust with this deep issue? Yes. At the heart of Christianity there is a cross. The central claim of Christianity is that Jesus Christ is God incarnate – which raises the question: what is God doing on a cross? At the very least that shows me that God has not remained distant from human suffering but has become part of it.”

When meditating on the cross, I do not get the sense of a neatly wrapped-up apologetic that settles doubts and answers questions. Instead...I, a bloody, ragged sinner, am extended a scarred hand...and the one who offers it to me is my only way out. Let joy wait for Sunday. Today it is good to remember the hurt.

(Mark 16:36) ἀββα ὁ πατήρ, (Abba, Father) παρένεγκε τὸ ποτήριον ἀπ’ ἐμοῦ τοῦτο (take this cup away from me)

ὁ πάντα   δυνατά σοι  (all things are possible to you) ἀλλ’ οὐ τί ἐγὼ θέλω   ἀλλὰ τί  σύ (not what I will, but your will be done) Amen.

Oppressed and afflicted, I'll hold my tongue (Isaiah 53:7) Despised and rejected and all alone (Isaiah 53:3) But father, I'm crying out, please don't turn your face away (Psalm 22:1)

My heart is so heavy that I could die (Mark 14:34) I'm begging you let this cup pass me by (Mark 14:36) If it is possible, let there be another way (Matthew 26:39)

(Mark 14:36) Abba, o pater (Abba, Father) omnia possibilia tibi sunt (all things are possible to you)

transfer calicem hunc a me (take away this cup from me) sed non quod ego volo sed quod tu (not what I will, but your will be done) Amen.

And God will provide for himself a lamb (Genesis 22:8) Father, you sent me, now here I AM (John 18:6) It's only the blood of a man can take their guilt away (Genesis 2:17)

I'll follow your will to the point of death (Philippians 2:8) My victory won with a final breath (Mark 15:37, 2 Thessalonians 2:8) To finish this once and for all, there is no other way (John 19:30)

Amen

The structure of this song is unusual. For many songs, each verse is different and the chorus repeats. I have the same text for each verse, but in two classical languages to pay respect to the history of the text, and to (artificially) add credibility to the text. I want to emphasize that it is Jesus’ words, so I distanced myself from English. For the choruses, a kind of “inner monologue” of the written word in the mind of the incarnate word plays out. Only when meditating on scripture can we hope to capture a glimpse of the mind of Christ.

The music itself came from multiple sources. I wrote the melody for the verse when I was in high school - a lonely, painful cry into the dark (like I said, high school). It sat unused for years. The melody for the chorus came to my head at some point while I was in college. Later, I realized they were compatible and combined them. I always thought a solo cello would have been better to start the song, but I don’t have a cello. I hummed the melody as a placeholder in early recordings, then got attached. Last of all, to develop the 2nd verse, I added some vocal harmonies. I knew that singing in Latin would bring chant to mind, but I was channeling more of a John Michael Talbot vibe there.

This song transitions to The Trial. In fact, that entire song was inspired by the transition.

[darthcalculus]

Why?

https://soundcloud.com/user-164597928/why

The problem of evil is the single strongest objection to Christianity. It tears through all the intellectual defenses and hits our emotions hard. Verse one deals with natural evil, though both events have also been directly caused by God himself (Numbers 16:31-33, Genesis 7:11-12). The second verse deals with evil at the hands of people. The end is a paraphrase of the late Christopher Hitchens’ unique way of expressing what he considered the absurdity of God’s plan of salvation for the world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kwiHkM126bk&t=19m35s

The ground opens up and swallows men and buries them and darkness Why? The sky opens up and the sea trespasses its boundaries Why?

Can't, or won't Malevolent or impotent The whip comes down upon the backs of those who are defenseless Why? The sword cuts down the innocent and takes what he possesses Why?

Can't, or won't Malevolent or impotent

What kind of a god Would watch, with arms crossed As we suffer and die With no light in the world Only darkness and pain

[darthcalculus]

Tyrant

I am a tyrant of ideas.

I surround myself with beliefs like a cabinet of advisers. They arm me with confidence to face the world. They are not the source of my essential worth, but without them I feel like I am nothing.

Yet I am a paranoid tyrant because I know that they can betray me. At any moment, one of my beliefs can suffer a mortal wound, but I will not cry, "My beloved idea!" I will twist the knife and say, "The truth would not have failed me."

I need constant warfare so that I may see how they fight. The assassin is my friend. I watch with eager anticipation to see which blow will pierce the armor so I can rejoice in the death of a lie, or rest in the strength of the truth.

[darthcalculus]

These images were produced to illustrate the answer to a Flat-Earther’s question about the visibility of stars from season to season. Hopefully, it should should that at a given latitude, certain stars will be visible all year ‘round.

[darthcalculus]

If This Is All There Is

https://soundcloud.com/user-164597928/if-this-is-all-there-is

We all want a better world. Many people trust in God to rescue them and redeem the world, but many others trust in themselves and each other. Do we have the love in our hearts that we need?

If this is all there is If this is all we have This is my life to live Let's live it while it lasts

Our time is precious Gone in a moment Our dreams and wishes You can't postpone it

(agape) If this is all there is (atheos) If you are all I have (agape) This is a privilege (atheos) We've only got one chance (agape)

Now, let me love you There's no forever No one above you It's now or never

It's all right, it's just us

My answer:

https://darthcalculus.tumblr.com/post/183784034641/drops-out

[darthcalculus]

Drops Out

https://soundcloud.com/user-164597928/drops-out

Without a transcendent moral foundation, there is no “capital-W” wrong. There is no “capital-R” right. There is only what is, and nothing which ought to be.

I maintain that moral nihilism is the only consistent moral position for atheism. Moral nihilism is entirely consistent with traditional notions of moral behavior - but behavior is all that it is. Nothing more.

“No one can tell me that I’m wrong” is either the most liberating or the most terrifying thing that could ever be said - it all depends on what you’re planning on doing.

The bottom drops out, drops out

No one can tell me that I'm wrong!

If this is all there is If this is all we have “Do what thou wilt” shall be the whole of the law

When I wrote the middle section, I was referencing Aleister Crowley’s Thelema. At the time, I thought “do what thou wilt” meant “do whatever you want.” I have since realized that is not quite what it means...but I’ve decided that I ruined the song perfectly. No matter whose metaphysics I cross, the point of the song is that nothing matters.

[darthcalculus]

Weight of the World

https://darthcalculus.tumblr.com/post/183711829461/darth-calculus

When you are overwhelmed with stress or depressed, your sense of time is distorted. Hours or days may go by without you noticing; an emergency may interrupt your daily cycle and blur several days together. When your troubles follow you all day, haunt your sleep, and are there to greet you in the morning, there is no relief at the end of a day; there is no motivation at the beginning of the next. There is only the weight of the world.

It's been tomorrow since yesterday

I dreamt that I was sleeping

The stars are vanished from the sky

And the time that they were keeping

Holding up the weight of the world

Holding up the weight of the world

Every day is another night

And night turns into morning

The sunshine brings another day

I take it as a warning

Holding up the weight of the world

Holding up the weight of the world

[darthcalculus]

(Darth Calculus)

[languill]

It’s sad how much of what is taught in school is useless to over 99% of the population.

There are literally math concepts taught in high school and middle school that are only used in extremely specialized fields or that are even so outdated they aren’t used anymore!

[flavoracle]

I took calculus my senior year of high school, and I really liked the way our teacher framed this on the first day of class.

He asked somebody to raise their hand and ask him when we would use calculus in our everyday life. So one student rose their hand and asked, “When are we going to use this in our everyday life?”

“NEVER!!” the teacher exclaimed. “You will never use calculus in your normal, everyday life. In fact, very few of you will use it in your professional careers either.” Then he paused. “So would you like to know why should care?”

Several us nodded.

He picked out one of the varsity football players in the class. “You practice football a lot during the week, right Tim?” asked the teacher.

“Yeah,” replied Tim. “Almost every day.”

“Do you and your teammates ever lift weights during practice?”

“Yeah. Tuesdays and Thursdays we spend a lot of practice in the weight room.”

“But why?” asked the teacher. “Is there ever going to be a play your coach tells you use during a game that requires you to bench press the other team?”

“No, of course not.”

“Then why lift weights?”

“Because it makes us stronger,” said Tim.

“Bingo!!” said the teacher. “It’s the same thing with calculus. You’re not here because you’re going to use calculus in your everyday life. You’re here because calculus is weightlifting for your brain.”

And I’ve never forgotten that.

[darthcalculus]

I am a math teacher and I’ve used that *exact* same word picture with my high schoolers. I am gratified that I’m not the only one who thought of it! And that there’s a chance that some of my students will remember it.

[darthcalculus]

Facts Don’t Care About Your Feelings

I encountered a homophobic, anti-semitic post today that featured a link to this article: https://www.advocate.com/world/2015/08/31/study-one-third-israelis-are-bisexual The logic of the post goes like this: 1) Jews are evil 2) Gays are evil 3) Ta-da! Despite the moral crisis inherent in that post, I decided to check the statistic. According to the sources at the bottom of the Wikipedia page, the actual bisexual population of Israel is more like 10%. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007%2Fs10508-015-0631-0 I was curious, so I checked the source for the article. It led me to a page in Hebrew, which I had to have Google translate for me: https://www.mako.co.il/pride-weekend/Article-1cfb2ac7c0b6f41006.htm I was unimpressed by the source. However, I did notice links to similar studies. https://www.mako.co.il/pride-news/global/Article-68a1c65efe95f41006.htm?Partner=rss&Partner=interlink https://www.mako.co.il/pride-sex-and-love/identity/Article-451ab2a2c805f41006.htm?Partner=interlink Apparently, the bisexual population in the US is also one-third, and in England, it is a staggering 50%. Everybody loses here. On one hand, we have the hopeful LGBTQ population hoping that they’re better represented around the world, inflating the numbers in poorly executed studies. On the other hand, we have the hateful bigot whose hastily cited source implicates the US and England as the same or worse as his target. The only thing left standing is the objective fact of the matter - which does not care whose hopes are broken.

[darthcalculus]

Marriage Equality in America

Christian family ministries affirm these points on a daily basis:   1. The family is the foundation of society   2. A marriage is the nucleus of most families Every day, the following is obvious to everyone:   3. Not everyone has the same idea of marriage We Christians seem to want to have our cake and eat it too. There are some who can't (not won't) participate in our ideal model. 

It's very awkward in one breath to say a good society needs strong families... And in the next breath to say gay people can't get married and have a family. Implicit in this apparent contradiction is that only traditional families are the foundation of society. But why? 

I can see an argument that only traditional marriages could be the foundation of a Christian society... But we don't have one of those. Neither do I think we should have one - only a secular society can guarantee religious freedom, and that's what I really want.

I guess what I'm saying is that I'd rather live as a stranger in a strange land - a Christian in a functional society destined for God's wrath - than attempt to force-fit a model of society on a culture that it won't fit. Only political compromise, not moral compromise, needed.

[darthcalculus]

Hitchens’ Razor

Hitchens' Razor: That which is asserted without evidence may be dismissed without evidence. A possible rebuttal is that since Hitchens' Razor is presented without evidence, then it can be dismissed without evidence. It is therefore false. My counter-rebuttal is that it is incoherent to simultaneously accept and reject a proposition.  If Hitchens’ Razor is self-contradictory, we should be able to discover that through a little analysis. Hitchens' Razor can be written as p -> q, where p: X is asserted without evidence q: X can be dismissed without evidence In order to show a contradiction, we would need to give an example of (p -> ~q) or (~q -> p). p -> ~q "If X is asserted without evidence, then X cannot be dismissed without evidence." In other words, I may make an accusation against someone and they must prove their innocence. This is not true. ~q -> p "If X cannot be dismissed without evidence, then X is asserted without evidence." In other words, everything you can't disprove is true. That's not right either. Hitch wrote a lot of things that Christians should disagree with, but this is not one of them.