“black as space, a soundless scream of rage and need”
“a churning storm in the Force”
“rage, like a ruinous storm that filled his head”
“his turmoil filled the Force, roiling and churning”
“he blazed in the Force, almost radiant with power, near-infinite promise”
“that endlessly conflicted mixture of light and dark had finally found himself”
aesthetic: different Force users describing how Ben Solo feels in the Force
Somethin’ filled up
My heart with nothin’,
Someone told me not to cry.
Now that I’m older,
My heart’s colder,
And I can see that it’s a lie.
Children wake up,
Hold your mistake up,
Before they turn the summer into dust.
If the children don’t grow up,
Our bodies get bigger but our hearts get torn up.
We’re just a million little god’s causin’ rain storms turnin’ every good thing to rust.
With my lightnin’ bolts a glowin’
I can see where I am goin’
With my lightnin’ bolts a glowin’
I can see where I am goin’
I can’t stop reciting the words to ‘Wake Up’ by Arcade Fire in my head when thinking about Kylo’s conflict and the human conflict we feel in growing up and coming to terms with our mistakes, our pains, our past. The lyrics of this song sing about the loss of innocence as we grow older, and our hearts becoming “colder.” How we bury deep in us the loss, pain and hurt that we have felt and it all builds up inside us - slowly breaking us down as time goes on, breeding more hurt which in effect leaves us feeling cold and devoid of the pure emotions we felt as children. This song is beautifully brutal in how it talks about loss of innocence in the beginning - maybe just as Ben Solo lost his innocence in his teen years when he was abandoned, seduced by the darkness and his inner demons, leaving him unfeeling and cold.
In the song, there’s a “something” that “filled up (the narrator’s) heart up with “nothing”. I presume this "something” could be a traumatic experience in the narrators life which caused them to lose the love and happiness in their hearts. This brings me to Ben Solo being strong in the dark side and the authority/parental figures in his life fearing something that is very much apart of him that should have been acknowledged and embraced rather than feared - a mistake which left him isolated and alone. Then he had the traumatic experience of Snoke’s mind manipulation who was the only father figure in his life for years. I imagine Snoke to be the type to punish the child for expressing his despair over the trauma by “telling (him/her) not to cry”.
One of the ways people who have experienced any sort of unfortunate experience is to block out the memory and the emotions associated with the event/time/people - “let the past die, kill it if you have to.” This will of course leave you feeling detached from a vital part of who you are, leaving you feeling that your life “is a lie.”
But the end of the song seems to be about the explosion of emotion that comes when the unfeeling comes to life again. I think we see this happening at different points with Kylo Ren in TLJ - from his sadness for his father’s death, in his expression when he thinks his mother is killed, and finally in the throne room battle scene with Rey when he seems fully alive, determined, balanced - he knows what he needs to do - even though in the end he chose to continue down the wrong path because he was not ready to acknowledge the “mistake” in his life and move on yet.
Wake Up by Arcade Fire is one of the most beautifully human songs I have heard, and every so often I need to listen to it to remind myself that everything is going to be okay. I think the lyrics are telling us not to repress our pain - because that would breed more pain and make our hearts “colder.” But the end of the song reminds us that as long as we acknowledge our pain and take the necessary steps to heal, to “wake up” our emotions, the good and bad, and we will find peace. I think that’s what EP. 9 will be, Ben Solo/Kylo Ren - the child/adult in him, the light/dark in him will find peace as he learns to acknowledge the "mistake" that has happened to him, and the mistakes that he’s made. I’m sure Uncle Luke will be there to guide him along then way to his redemption and healing as well. Kylo Ren deserves to live, he deserves to heal.
— The fact that you are so strong in the Force and have had such relatively little training could have terrible consequences. For you, and for everyone around you.
— You could warn me when I do something bad. Blink once for dark side, twice for light.
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