breathe it in.

Kim Jongkook aka Commander. 35 Club Manager of 'The Carousel' (Undercover Police Agent) "All men must die, but first we'll live." Closed RP Account

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One Call

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[...]

When his voice resonates in the cluttered room, she turns her head to him and shrugs before presenting him with a rare grin for a second and then turning to the book in her hand. She flips through it without interest. “It’s just that…Sometimes people here look like they’re Alice trudging to Wonderland.” Putting back the book in its rightful place, she busies herself with examining his trinkets again. “I mean, the citizens here represent Alice…while we—well…” She stands upright. 

“Do you get where I might be going with it?” Noir returns to her seat and folds her hands on top of her lap, now crossed over with each other. With everything that’s going on, she might as well remake Alice in Wonderland with her own rendition. Maybe that would be more exciting than a blonde walking in a hazy high dream with dumb twins, a purple cat, and a stupid tea party.

[daxjongkook]

There was a light murmur of agreement from him, the edge of his mouth curving subtly into what seemed like an amused look upon her reply. That kind of comparison was the first he had heard, but somehow it was rather fitting. He leaned back against his chair, eyes following Noir as she returned to her seat.

He smiled at the female in front of him before speaking. “Are you saying that we’re the... eccentric people that lead innocent folks into weird adventures? Sounds about right,” Jongkook chuckled and shook his head. “I’d say in real life, it’s a lot more darker than the story is though.”

What seemed like a glorified life amidst the bright neon light of the city all has its own story to tell. He did. Noir definitely did. And sometimes, it’s a scar that still bring about pain from time to time. One that could never be healed and recovered from no matter how much one tried to.

“Which character do you most relate yourself to in the Wonderland?” He asked casually, arms crossing over his chest while the papers spread all over his desk were forgotten temporarily for the moment. 

[daxkwangsoo]

{ Convergence }

[daxkwangsoo]

Kwangsoo can be as quite observant at times, but then again, he could also be as dumb as a blockhead at other times. There was no specific in between. This time, he was a thorough blockhead who couldn’t quite sense anything wrong with his best friend or his hyung.

Between the manager’s questioning and Joongki’s response, Kwangsoo sat silently on his seat, occasionally nodding his head to himself since there wasn’t any reason for him to speak. His friend needed the money and he knew how important the job was to him. Jongkook had always been very fussy and strict about matters concerning the club, but nonetheless he hoped that Joongki would get the job.

And it turned out his worry was for nothing. Joongki was accepted straight away, without even being asked a lot of questions. He couldn’t help but be a little envy of his best friend.

Granted, it wasn’t the manager who had personally interviewed him when he applied for the job years ago, but it felt like he was being interrogated for ages before being told to wait for their call. Joongki certainly had it easy, but the happiness of his friend being accepted overpowered that small feeling.  

[13xjingoo]

Joongki glanced down when Jongkook slid the papers across the desk–and for a moment, he thought he caught something almost kind in his gaze. But that couldn’t be. Kind wasn’t a word that could be extended to Kim Jongkook.

Even if he did hand over the job that easily. Surprise curdled Joongki’s stomach; he hadn’t expected an offer to come mere minutes after arriving in the office. All he had done was make claims about his waiting experience, and that was all. No request for a resume, references, or even names of the places he worked. He wondered if Jongkook would have done the same for anyone else, and then he wondered what he wanted the answer to that question to be. 

(Then again, Joongki could admit to himself that he hadn’t changed much. He was older, more mature, more confident–but he was still trusting and mostly honest. Joongki was someone that Jongkook could probably just take at his word. 

Just like a kid. One he could pity and toss coins at to get him out of the way.)

Joongki realized he had been clenching his teeth. He let out a long breath and put on the charming smile he used to convince the market ajummas to knock a few more won off the going price. “Thank you, sir. When would you like me to start?”

[daxjongkook]

For a short while, it felt too suffocating when his office lapsed into a complete silence. Joongki wasn’t talking, and neither was Kwangsoo who was usually talkative and would take every chance to prattle. As for him, there wasn’t a reason to, and the appearance of Joongki still had him taken aback.

Joongki... probably hated him, didn’t he? He promised he would take care of him and his older sister for the rest of their life, but he broke that promise and left. Joongki would have hated him to the core for abandoning them just like that, just like how their father did. He mocked himself inwardly. It was such a joke and a slap to the face. Did he regret his choice? Probably. But he was young and inexperience back then, and a human who would make stupid mistake too. Still, he didn’t think it was a mistake to protect them, even if his method wasn’t the most ideal one of all.

He looked up when Joongki finally spoke, smoothly hiding his surprise and guilt under his calm and overly-detached facade. The smile Joongki gave him was too fake, and it bothered him that he was using this smile on him, despite knowing the reason why.

“You can start work next monday,” he answered. “Have Kwangsoo take you around to familiarise with the club for the next few days. He knows what to do.” Kwangsoo had been working for the club for years, he should be able to guide Joongki well. He turned to address the tall bartender. “Stop by Hyejin to get him measured for his uniforms later on. You guys can go off if there’s nothing else.”

He needed the time alone to clear his mind.  

[taeyongxdr]

Rumor Has It [ Lay & Jongkook]

It was a rare moment of quiet. 

The Carousel had yet to open its doors for the night. It was the calm before the storm, some might say. For Lay, it was just an opportunity to get some actual work done. He could do a bit of networking, strike up conversation with some of the staff that he wouldn’t cross paths with while working the floor. In particular, it was a chance to try and track down the ever elusive bar manager. 

Though rumor had it that the man hardly left the bar– he was allegedly a bit of a workaholic– Lay had still been having trouble stealing a moment of the man’s time. When the Carousel was open, Lay was stuck working the stages or the crowd, only able to mingle with his coworkers during his break or between trips to the bar. It didn’t exactly leave much room for conversation.

So he’d come in early today in hopes of catching Jongkook in his office. 

Fixing a friendly smile on his face, Lay rapped his knuckles against the manager’s office door before popping his head inside. 

“Excuse me, Jongkook-sii?”

[daxjongkook]

Staring at all the papers in front of him, Jongkook could not quite bring himself to focus, and was instead spacing out here and there. Every time he tried to concentrate on all the tasks he needed to get working on, his mind wandered else where by itself. Moments like this were rare and seldom, even if they do occur from time to time, especially when his brain refused to cooperate with the rational part of him. 

There was also something else bugging him. He had been feeling rather restless lately, but could not pinpoint what exactly was wrong either. In a way that frustrated him, because he hated it when he had no control over things like that. When there was a knock on his door from outside, he snapped out of his reverie and was a little thankful for the distraction.

 “Yes, what’s the matter?” As strict as he was when it concerned things regarding the club, he still hold the welfare of his staff in high regards, and that was why most of them remained loyal, and tight-lipped even if they knew what was truly going on behind the scene.

As for the new staff Fai, he still wasn’t sure if he could trust him or not. That was something still to be determined yet. 

[daxjongkook]

Crimson Glow || JK/DH

As the manager of Carousel, Jongkook’s usually either stuck behind piles of papers with problems waiting for him to settle, or prowling about the premise to ensure everything was going on well for the club. In spite of that, there are also times in which he had to be out of his comfort zone entertaining clients, or clearing up messes that could potentially compromise his secret double identity.

It was of the latter case as he ended the phone call and got out of his car, maneuvering through the crowd that was growing with each passing second in front of a particular cafe. He took a brief look at all the shattered glass shards surrounding the display window, before easing himself into the premise of the cafe.

It was rather chaotic that no one ever noticed him entering the bloody murder scene,  and what greeted him was an unbelievable sight of a dead person lying in a pool of blood, and whether it was all that person’s own blood was unknown. Must had been an amateur to leave such a big mess to deal with. He sighed inwardly. Many years ago he would have been the one investigating the murderer, now he was covering up for the murderer. Well, not exactly, but he had to make sure neither the the Carousel nor the gang behind it would be dragged into this. It was clear the person hadn’t done a clean job.

The police would arrive any moment and he had to be quick. He gave a glance at the dead body, but there didn’t seem to be anything notable and so he proceeded on to the cafe itself. His keen eyes quickly noticed the lighter with a particular C letter on it, just lying silently just beside the table. He subtly retrieved the item and hide it within his pocket, while the siren of the police could be heard miles away and getting nearer. It would be even more suspicious for him to leave now, and so he retreated back to a corner of the cafe and leaned against the wall, arms crossed over his chest as he waited.

daxdonghae   

[prev-rmedits-blog]

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One Call

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[...] The female stands up, suddenly feeling a little restless, and walks over to the shelves of books and other things resting on the male’s quaint, little office. There’s some volumes of books that she’s never dreamt of even reading or that she’s not quite sure if Jongkook read. Regardless, she picks one from the bunch and flips through it before putting it back in it’s rightful place on the shelf she got the book from. She’s always been curious of the things in Jongkook’s office even if this is her second time being in the room. It just shows just how much they don’t hang out or talk due to their differing lifestyle and jobs. Actually, Noir has always been curious of the Diamonds as a whole. Aside from drugs and dealing it, what else do they do? Even if Spades and Diamonds are alliances, there’s always been a curiosity on what else the Diamonds did. This curiosity is one thing Noir would want to delve into. Out of many things, it isn’t the origins of a person or the age or the birthday but this. The things that happens underground.

“Have you read Alice in Wonderland before…?” Noir suddenly asks, looking at the books. It’s a funny question to pose but how the underground is, it reminds her of Wonderland. A much more complex and twisted one.

[daxjongkook]

He paused briefly, as if mulling slightly over Noir’s words before speaking again, “I’m ordering Chinese food, fancy any?” Her reply wasn’t one that had been unexpected, but still, it wouldn’t have mattered much. If she had wanted food from other restaurant he would have gladly made another call for her even though he knew she wouldn’t want to trouble him. 

Nonetheless he gave her a smile before placing the phone receiver over his ear, and continued conversing with the other party at the end of the line who was waiting patiently to get his order. It took a bit of time for the call, gaze momentarily following Noir when she stood up and busied herself with the books on the shelves in his office. There were a few more exchange of words over the phone, fingers tapping lightly on his desk before he eventually hung up.

Gathering a few of the scattered papers across the desk, Jongkook looked up as soon as Noir’s voice echoed through the room. There was a brief moment of confusion upon the female’s out of the blue question, but despite that he responded after a short pause.

“As a child, yes...” He used to like stories like these, and in his childhood memories his mother often read books to him, of wonderful fairy tales that always ends up living happily ever after. However the older he got, the more he realised that happy ending doesn’t exist in real life. It was all just lies told to little kids and get their hopes up. “Something on your mind?” He added, looking curiously at Noir.

[zwalice]

simply impassable

daxjongkook

Its been a few weeks. Possibly a while more, a long enough time to get to know someone of course, but also just a blip of a blink in the scale of time. Not that Jaejun’s interest in the Carousel’s manager has been wavering at all. Oh no. Just because he has a good many interests in this life doesn’t mean he’s forgotten all about the mystery that is Kim Jongkook. 

Its not often that people have such a mysterious aura to the man who is himself an oddity. 

A charming demeanor such as that which Jongkook wears is certainly a wonderful disguise for whatever he becomes in the shadows. True, while this man might not nearly be so exciting as Jaejun’s manga-rotted brain wants him to be, he has a feeling that there’s something of definite interest hidden behind that easygoing smile. The man he presents himself as is highly desirable actually, even to Jaejun who couldn’t tell you what a gender preference was if he tried. And such a thing, to be so attractive a person in attitude as that, it makes Jaejun question the veracity of it all. Its different from his seme senpai, because that man was strange too. Even with how suave he seemed, the Siwon mister had a definite bit of yaoi or shojou manga-ness to him.

While Kim Jongkook doesn’t.

No, if anything, the man has a definite seinen vibe. The blonde grins and rubs his hands together in only slightly perverted delight. Its been a while since Jaejun has explored someone like that. Of course he keeps his curious gloating to himself, remaining hidden behind a telephone pole until Jongkook rounds the next corner on his way home. This time Jaejun is going to follow him all the way back. Well, not all the way inside his house (that’s for another time after he’s picked the lock on the apartment window), but he’s definitely intending to snoop around the yard and watch the outside of the house to see if anyone comes or goes from the place in the hours that Jongkook is off from managing the club.

Tailing Kim Jongkook home in his ninja-stalking attire of black from head to toe, Jaejun is eager to find this man’s secret.

[daxjongkook]

It wasn’t uncommon for people to get suspicious of him, considering his job’s position, and he had his fair share of being suspected.

However, it definitely wasn’t common for him to be actually stalked from his workplace and all the way back home. No one really had that guts to do that. His strong attitude combined with his brawny physique were enough signals to people not to mess with him if anything.

But there’s always a few special ones out there.

Like this particular one who was stalking him and now hiding behind a telephone pole, clad in an all black outfit. He was doing a good job trying to hide himself, that much the older man would admit. However, he wasn’t an average and ordinary club manager. Of course he wasn’t, no one would know his another identity working for the police.

His apartment wasn’t too far off from his workplace, and sometimes he preferred to walk back home instead of driving, with the reason that he could do a bit of extra workout. Familiar with the neighborhood area, he decided to play along and acted ignorant towards the presence of his stalker until the right timing. Once the man reached the end of straight path, he rounded off the next corner and quickly camouflage himself in the darkness of a narrow alley. It was either being able to successfully shake him off, or he would have to confront him straight on.

[daxkwangsoo]

{ Convergence }

[daxkwangsoo]

He should have realized something was particularly out of place when Jongkook didn’t greet him like how he usually would after barging into his office. When he did, the older man would often either shoot him a death glare, throw the nearest thing he could get his hand on at him, or threaten him.

Sometimes it was all three of that.

But this time round he didn’t, and Kwangsoo happily concluded that it was because Joongki was with him, and that was why he was so amiable. See, his best friend was already bringing him good luck before he even got accepted for the job.

He took a seat straight away, before Jongkook could even finish his sentence, casting a slightly worried glance at Joongki who seemed to have stiffened up at his spot. Why was he even that nervous for this job interview?

In a way, he shouldn’t even be in the office with Joongki, since it was his best friend that was being interviewed for the job. But Jongkook didn’t seem to mind since he wasn’t chased away, and so he remained in the room, even if just to quietly give support to his friend.

“Of course he does!” Kwangsoo blurted out, even though the question was obviously for Joongki to answer. “Sorry, I’ll keep my mouth shut,” he did a zipping motion with his hand over his lips, nodding his head earnestly at the club manager lest he kicked him out of the room. 

[13xjingoo]

Joongki forced himself to straighten up, and he took the other chair, as ordered. 

(He had always listened when Jongkook told him to do something. Not that he had done much ordering, but back then his requests were usually accompanied by–kinder expressions than the one he wore now. Joongki thought that he had long since gotten over Jongkook’s abrupt exit from his and Jihyo’s lives, but the way this cool reception hit him, it dug up the ghost of old hurts.)

It took a moment for him to find the politely pleasant smile he used on antagonistic customers, but Joongki latched onto it. If Jongkook didn’t care about seeing him again–and he couldn’t, he wasn’t even looking at him–then Joongki would do his best to pretend they were strangers.

(Jongkook was letting Kwangsoo stay, even though this was supposed to be an interview. Joongki pushed down the feeling that threatened to escape and the memories of all the times Kwangsoo and referenced this man he was close to.

It didn’t matter. It wouldn’t matter.) 

Before Joongki could answer Jongkook’s question, Kwangsoo interrupted. Joongki was grateful for it–it dragged him out of the past and back into the present. He needed a better paying job, and he was going to get this one, if he could.

He smiled briefly at Kwangsoo–a real smile–in thanks for easing the tension a little, and put his polite smile back on for Jongkook. Or the point just above Jongkook’s head, at least. “I’ve worked as a waiter off and on for the last seven years,” he said. “The first few years were mostly part time work at smaller restaurants, but two years ago I began working at bars and nightclubs. While none of them were as impressive as the Carousel, I can handle drunk customers.”

[daxjongkook]

The older man wasn’t sure why he couldn’t even bring himself to look at Joongki straight in the eyes. Guilt? Pain? Regret? Or was it resentment at himself for leaving him and his older sister, even though he had convinced himself that it was for their best that he stayed as far away as possible from them in fear of both of them being targeted due to his job’s nature. He did not want to. He had to. 

But then here he was, the young boy he had used to dote so much and treated like he was his own younger brother appearing right before his eyes again, in a place that he didn’t ever want him to be sighted in.

Clouded by past memories and wandering thoughts, he didn’t give much thought to the forever tactless tall kid rambling by Joongki’s side. All he could focus on was the fact that Joongki had worked at bars and nightclubs since two years ago. Why did he have to do that? Did they lack money? The Jihyo he knew was so protective of her younger brother, she would never allow that, or did she not know where Joongki had been working at?

And then this all boiled down to one question. Should he let Joongki work here? It wasn’t a place he would approve of him working, but if he rejected him, there’s always the chance that he could approach other nightclubs to work at.

...at least he could keep his eye on Joongki if he let him work here. As much as Kwangsoo was a really troublesome kid at times, he could still count on him to help Joongki familiarize with the environment here.

After a short pause, he quietly slid the stack of papers in front of Joongki before finally looking at him, a rare tender look in his eyes despite his impassive demeanor. “Three months of probation period, you’ll get your basic salary every month and it increases over time, tips from the customers aren’t under the club’s management so it goes to you entirely.”    

[daxjongkook]

Holding On  || flashback || Jongkook/Jihyo

[jihyoxtlou]

She laughed happily when he suddenly covered her face with innocent, light-hearted kisses, each one sending a flutter down her spine, holding onto his broad shoulders in reflex.

She was about to protest about the food – really, her oppa should know better than to joke about food, it was just not a joking matter – when he kissed her again, this time anything but innocent and light-hearted. Okay, fine, for that food could take be put on the backburner.

(For a while.)

She made a soft noise in the back of her throat when he sucked on her lower lip, shifting so she was straddling his lap, wrapping her arms around his shoulders tighter. Maybe all he needed from his thoughts was some distraction, and she was more than happy to give it to him, to kiss the taste of alcohol from his lips, to kiss every ounce of insecurity away and replace it with the confidence she felt for him.   

She laughed breathlessly against his lips.

“I did…?” she answered, a little confused about his sudden question. It wasn’t like she used anything special – the cheapest, biggest bottle of shower gel she could find in some generic lemon smell so Joongki could use it as well and she didn’t need to buy two bottles. Maybe – Maybe now he was gone she should try for something more girly? 

“What a weird thing to say,” she joked, pressing a kiss where his jawline and ear met, a sensitive spot she knew. She’d had plenty of time memorizing all his sensitive spots, every inch of skin, every sound, every movement, and still, she couldn’t get enough. She didn’t think she ever would.

“Oppa,” she said, replacing her mouth on his skin with her fingers, softly tracing his jawline from his ear back to his lips. “You were joking about the food, right?”

She looked up at him from underneath her eyelashes, dropping her hand to his chest (and god, did she love that chest, and did she love it was hers to touch and only hers) and smiling coyly: “I’m definitely going to need food after.”

[daxjongkook]

He didn’t know whether to laugh or cry at her confused reply when he told her she smelled good. There were times when Jihyo could get so oblivious to the point he felt like he shouldn’t be tainting her purity like that. It was as if she was the innocent girl and he was the bad guy teaching her stuff she shouldn’t be exposed to. But deep down he knew that Jihyo wasn’t that naive. They had spent enough time together for him to know that.

Opening his mouth, he wanted to object to her statement of him saying weird thing. It wasn’t weird, because she did smell good to him. It was a scent he wouldn’t never get tired of, and one that sent heat coursing through him like an electric current.

In the end he didn’t though, because she had effectively shut him off by kissing the spot where she knew it was sensitive to him. The only sound he made was a low grunt through his heavy breathing.

“Hmm?” he responded, trying to pull her closer to him on his lap if that was even possible. He chuckled, his chest moving up and down with each laugh. He brought his hand up to her face, thumb tracing the curve of her slightly swollen lips.

“Yes, I am joking about the food. There’s no way I would starve my precious girlfriend, would I?” he inched forward to coax another kiss from her. Maybe he was wrong about not getting drunk after all, because he seemed to be getting slightly intoxicated. And there was an undeniable itching thirst growing, one that had nothing to do with drinking at all.

“Any food you want, is that good enough for you?” he added, leaving her lips as his mouth traveled south instead, sucking on her smooth, bare neck.

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One Call

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The female shrugs lightly at his words. It’s true, it really did seem as if Jongkook didn’t have any time on his hands. It all seems like he cares more about work than the basic indulgence of life. But, who is she to know actually? She seldom sees him but she’s not complaining, she’s never the type to complain. At least, she thinks she doesn’t, she knows she doesn’t. All her life, she just grins and bears it because that’s what her mother taught her to do.

Pursing her lips, she nods at his laughter. Only him and maybe a few can truly understand her dark, dry sense of humor and playfulness. It’s actually quite surprising because people don’t really see her as the type to even laugh a little. But, she can understand. She keeps it all to herself and if she’s satisfied in doing that, then the world seems satisfied as well. But, she’s not here for the world, she’s here for a dear friend. Noir breathes and then shrugs again, a small smile creeping up on her lips. “If I were to scare you, you’d already put your guard up considering how I already told you.” She points out. “But thank you, I’ll be there shortly.” Her steps echoes at the beat of her words as she finds herself walking with company. A favorable one, actually. A good one, one of the best.

Not before long, she stops and looks up. She’s already there. Oh how times have passed as the two talked on the phone. “I’m already here, I’ll be in your office.” She lets him say a few more words if needed to before hanging up and going in The Carousel.

The Diamonds are closely affiliated to the Clubs so obviously, they treat each other well. The Diamonds supply the “specific” needs to others in Seoul and the Clubs take care of what’s needed to be taken care of. Drug deals and weaponry, the world goes mad at the concept. Not mad as in angry and hurt but mad as in they are willing to bring it in pop culture. Guns, narcotics, bombs. It’s something Noir has always been amused by once she had joined Clubs. Clutching the door handle of The Carousel, she wonders. What compelled Jongkook to go out of his time to even talk to her? It’s a nice gesture, yes, but he’s always so busy. Maybe he really did just want to talk to her and catch up. But Noir has always been a little over analytic with everything coming her way. With a sigh, she shakes her head and goes in, greeting various staffs and guards eventually revealing that she was here to see Jongkook to which the staff complies willingly enough to take her in the office of the said manager. 

She smiles at the staff helping her and dismisses them with a nod and a “Thank you” before knocking. What conversations would she have today?

[daxjongkook]

Jongkook chuckled, and shook his head at Noir’s answer over the phone when she pointed out the obvious to him. She might not have the most conventional kind of humor that most people had, but it didn’t bother him. He understood her enough to appreciate it, as was his high level of proficiency at sarcasm.

He continued chatting with her through the phone, and occasionally finding himself smiling at seemingly trivial matters. He was tired. Tired of having to put up a facade all the time, and being another person that was foreign even to himself. There was never a time where he could truly be just himself, and chatting with Noir was one of the rare moments he could let his guard down, even if just a bit. He didn’t need to explain much to her and she understood him.

Nodding his head, he swiped his thumb over the screen and ended the call after a few more words. He casually placed the phone back on the desk, eyes scanning over the cluster of paper stacks followed by a tired sigh. Legal or not legal, undercover or not undercover, there were too many things for him to manage. Why couldn’t those people just decide and handle trifling stuff by themselves. It wasn’t as if choosing the wrong sequins on the strippers’ outfit would destroy the club’s reputation.

As he scribbled away on the papers, his stomach started to growl, and it was only then he realised he had yet to have his dinner. He picked up the receiver of the office’s phone, pressing a button and waited for the line to go through. He was in the midst of ordering, when there was a knock from the outside of his office’s door, and he temporarily paused the call.  

“Come in,” he called out, face lighting up with a bright smile when he saw Noir. “Perfect timing. Are you hungry? I’m ordering food right now, would you like anything?”

[daxjongkook]

Quiescent || Past - JK/EH

Driving down the busy night-street of Seoul, the numerous flashing bright lights and neon signboards were starting to get on his edge. Once he steered his car left at a cross junction and drove into a narrower street, his eyes briefly scanned over the familiar area before parking his car by the sidewalk.

Despite the time of the day, the street was still filled with people, drunk or not, and he had to carefully maneuver his way around them. It was not the time nor place for him to attract any attention, nor did he want to fight his way through them.

It wasn’t until he reached a much more isolated part of the avenue that he slowed his pace down. He let out a sigh, side stepping over a puddle of oddly coloured fluid that he did not wish to know what it really was, before walking into a relatively quiet small local bar – one that was easy to miss without any knowledge of it existing.

The interior of the bar was hushed and simple, a slow jazz song playing in the background with only a handful of customers. It did not take long for him to spot a familiar figure by the bar counter and seated on a high stool. With a few long stride, he easily crossed the room and slid onto the stool next to the figure.               

He quietly ordered for a glass of non-alcoholic drink, only to receive a soft laugh from the figure next to him. He sighed, but there was a slight smirk upon his face. “May I ask what’s so funny?” he turned to look at Eunhye, fingers lightly tapping on the counter top.

daxeunhye

[daxjongkook]

Holding On  || flashback || Jongkook/Jihyo

[jihyoxtlou]

[...]

She lifted the hand that wasn’t entwined with his to run through his hair, even if the angle was a little awkward. She knew he’d be flustered at saying those words out loud, her touch almost soothing.

“I love you too,” she said, quietly, and she wouldn’t be like her parents, she would never say the words and not fight her hardest to keep them. To her, they weren’t just words, it was a prayer, a religion, and she would devote her entire life to it. 

“I don’t want anything else,” she said sincerely, and it sounded almost like a promise, like acceptance. To stay with him, to be the one who could mean enough to him to cheer him up when he was sad, it was all she wanted. She nodded simply to his request to stay the night – it wasn’t as if she’d been planning on leaving him when she’d seen how sad he was.

She grinned, the words becoming a little too heavy for her liking, so she continued as a joke: “Well… except food, maybe. And more kisses. Do you think you can give me that much, oppa?”

[daxjongkook]

To hear the same words back from her, that she loved him too, was the only thing he needed to drain all his frustration and disappointment away. He wouldn’t give up, wouldn’t let a minor setup hinder him in his way, and he would hold on all because of her.

The edge of his lips curved upwards considerably when she nodded her head to his request, craning his head forward to plant a soft kiss on her rosy cheek.

He deliberately paused, as if in deep thinking about her request, only to nonchalantly quip with a “...maybe?” He released his arms from around her, shifting over as he gestured for Jihyo to sit sideway on his lap instead, so that he could look at her straight in the eyes.

His arms found their way around her once again, as he littered her face with feathery kisses – her forehead, her nose, her cheeks and along her jaw, before leaning back and staring at her with a smug grin. “I’m not so sure about the food, but I can definitely give you more kisses,” and with that he recaptured her pink lips in his again, in a slower and almost sensual movement.

“Did you have a shower before you came here?” he asked in between his kisses, gently sucking on her pouting lower lip before continuing. “Why do you smell so good?” And almost too inviting to him. With such a huge distraction in front of him, all those ugly and unpleasant thoughts were pushed to the far back of his mind for now. Jihyo was with him and that’s all that mattered.

[daxjongkook]

Holding On  || flashback || Jongkook/Jihyo

[jihyoxtlou]

[...]

As always, his kisses were enough to make her go boneless in her arms, his lips on hers the only thing she could focus on, every point of contact between them highlighted to her mind as if in neon, as if on fire, a harmless, warm fire,dancing along her veins.

Fucking lungs and their fucking need for air. So useless…

She let herself be pulled against him, tracing idle patterns with her finger on his arms around her. 

“I don’t mind,” she said to his words, honestly. “I hate seeing you hurt, but … not showing it is worse, right?”

She lowered her head a little, embarassed at her own sentimentality.

“If it’s you… I want to take care of you, and I want to be the one who worries about you.”

She laughed to cover up how silly she was being, hoping he wouldn’t take her words as seriously then, but it was true. She wanted to carry it all for him, so he wouldn’t have to bear it alone. She wanted to be the one who was allowed to hold him and see him like this, the one to hold him through the pain. All his worries and sorrows, she wanted to share all of that, too. Not just the happy moments when it was easy, true strength, she learned, came from struggling.

It didn’t matter what it was, as long as they could do it together, she wouldn’t want anything else.

[daxjongkook]

Jihyo’s words seemed to strike a tight cord of his, when she said that she hated seeing him hurt. Aside from his parents, no one else ever showed him that they actually cared about him and his feelings. She was the one who truly cared about him, and believed in him no matter what.

He tightened his embrace on her, feeling overwhelmed with emotions, but in a good way. He breathed, and buried his face in her neck.

“I love you, Jihyo-ya, I really love you,” he mumbled against her neck, voice slightly muffled because he was too flustered to say that out loud to her. In all their years of dating, he rarely said that to her, preferring to show his love to her through actions. Though only because to him, the word held a lot of meaning and promises that he wasn’t sure if he could keep true to them.

But in moment like this, he couldn’t help it. He had decided that she would be the only woman in his life, and the only woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. The thought of not having her around was just terrifying.

She was worth it all, and he would even risk his life just to protect her and keep her safe.

“If you have to take care of me for the rest of your life, would you still want to?” he asked, grabbing her hand that was drawing patterns on his arm as he intertwined their fingers together. He was almost afraid that she would say no, even though he knew she would.

Sometimes he couldn’t understand why she would even want to be with him when there were far better guys out there, but it was the same for him, wasn’t it? He wanted Jihyo, and only her.        

“Stay with me for the night, will you?” It wasn’t so much of a question, but more of a request. He didn’t want to be alone, and while it wouldn’t be the first time she spent the night here at his house, he really needed her this time round.

[sandaraxda-deactivated20150707]

One Call

+ daxjongkook

In her life, Noir doesn’t really have someone to turn to. There have been a few, sure but not really and it’s only a select few. One of them, of course, just happens to be someone she’s speaking to right now. It’s unexpected obviously but the two have history, not necessarily a bad one it’s more of a neutral one, the type where they both have a mutual understanding and a dependency over each other. To Noir, Jongkook is the older brother Noir wished she had at some point in her life.

It all started after Noir’s mission, the usual scoping things out and then making sure no evidence is left over. She personally doesn’t like doing missions in the daytime because of the amount of people that would be there and would see, and would be killed in the vicinity, so she delays it until nighttime when the world is asleep and no one would be there or almost no one. So, that’s what she did. She waited during the nights when the world is asleep. It could have just been her sense of justice that she’s harboring. Noir isn’t the villain people portray her to be, in actuality she’s more of the anti-hero of Seoul. She doesn’t display any heroic attributes but she has a sense of justice. But that could just be her sense of wanting to be a cop like back in the old days. After all, the streets of Seoul are plagued with corruption. People just indulge in the sins like it’s Las Vegas except the subtle kind of indulgent.

Walking in her heels, she hums against her phone. Obviously, she loves to talk to Jongkook and bond with him. It’s not usual that they would see each other so, him calling her is a surprise. “Well…it’s been a while, yes.” She interjects and then chuckles lightly. Then something he asks for her makes him smile. 

She turns the corner and walks again. “But of course I’ll visit you. You’re always in your office.” She nods and listens to him talk again as she walks. “I’ll be there soon. You’ve caught me at the right time, actually. I’m near your place, would it be best for you to meet me. Or should I just pop in and scare you?” She jokes with her slightly dry humor.

In all honesty, Jongkook is one of the few handfuls of people she could care to joke around with and she doesn’t mind that. He’s one of the few people that she would let in her life and she’s perfectly fine with that because she knows him and he knows her. A mutual understanding, that’s what they have.

[daxjongkook]

Jongkook knew perfectly that from the moment he requested for the undercover mission and got accepted, his life was never going to be the same again. It was a treacherous path he could never turn back, and there was the possibility that he could get himself killed without even a moment’s notice. There was no one he could trust and depend on. He only had himself to rely on.

But then he realised that things were not what he had expected to be. People did not only exist in two categories between the good and the bad. Bad people weren’t always bad, and good people didn’t always remained being good. It was messing up the righteous belief that he had grew up with, that he even started doubting himself for the things he did, whether it was for the better or for the worse.

And then there were them. People who he didn’t think he could actually somehow depend on and grew close to in a world like this. One of them being Noir, even though he couldn’t quite remember how they got to know each other. They just did.

“Of course, you know that as the club’s manager, I have a lot of things to handle,” he replied, clutching his phone in between his ear and his shoulder while he busied himself with the documents strayed all over his desk.

He stopped writing and moved his hand over to grab the phone. “I can’t quite get away right now, so do me a favor and pop by my office. I’m feeling generous now so I’ll agree to one of your requests if you manage to scare me,” he laughed. “The guards and staffs know you, so it shouldn’t be a problem.”       

[daxjongkook]

Holding On  || flashback || Jongkook/Jihyo

[jihyoxtlou]

[...]

“Joongki thinks you’re the second greatest. The greatest being me, so that’s a fair loss,” she joked lightly, but turned serious again in an instant.

“If it’s not enough, try harder. I don’t know why this one got away, but there’s others who won’t. Work harder, find more. Some of them will get away, but every single one that doesn’t is something that matters.”

She couldn’t stand the thought of him thinking he was useless, of him doing not enough. She loved him for always trying his hardest, but right now she wished he didn’t, that he could look at things and accept defeat, that it wouldn’t bring him down like this.

“Oppa, do you remember? When I came to you and said they would take Joongki from me?” her eyes grew sad at the memory, but she brought up a smile when she remember him. “You stayed up all night, even if you had training in the morning, and you held me and you helped me fill in all the documents and you kept saying ‘it will be fine’, that all I had to do was be brave and persistent. I was so broken, but you kept me from falling apart. Without you… I wouldn’t have made it at all.”

She gave him another smile, speaking slowly, wanting her words to sink in.

“You did that. You saved me.” 

She’d been such a mess, so lost and broken and hurt, she couldn’t even think, just a mindless animal in panic. But he’d stayed with her and given her direction, he’d been the only thing she could lean on, her pillar, the sun her whole world revolved around, steady like a calm heartbeat. 

Everything she was today, was because he hadn’t given up on her, because he hadn’t left when she was pathetic. He hadn’t complained at all, just took it all on his shoulder, as if they could take the whole world without faltering.

How could someone like that ever be useless? 

“Maybe it’s not much – I guess in the grand scheme of things it isn’t at all – But I’m still grateful there’s someone like you in this world. My life is still better because I have you.”

[daxjongkook]

He cherished the kiss she gave him, and returned her smile with a more lighthearted one. She managed to elicit a laugh from him at her attempted joke, the shape of his eyes shifting into a crescent-like moon.

Jihyo was important to him, and was so Joongki whom he treated like a younger brother he never had. The skinny little boy who was mature in his own way, he shouldn’t be exposed to the corrupted reality of the world. He desperately wanted to protect the both of them.

He didn’t say anything and only nodded his head as Jihyo started talking about the incident with Joongki almost being taken away from her. It was a situation that he never, ever wanted to see Jihyo in again, when he remembered how broken and almost to the point of being hysterical Jihyo was in. It broke his heart into pieces seeing Jihyo in that state.

“You made it sound like I’m an invincible superhero who saved your life,” and he smiled at her, a sincere smile that spoke of contentment. She always had her way of cheering him up, and he couldn’t imagine a future without her in it.

Cupping her face in his palm, he couldn’t help but lean in to capture her soft lips in a light kiss, effectively cutting her words off and stopping whatever she had wanted to say. The room was starting to get a little too stuffy for him, whether it was from the alcohol running through his bloodstream or because of Jihyo it didn’t matter, as he tilted his head to deepen the kiss.

His hand moved on its own accord, pulling her closer to him as his kisses got more frenzy by second. It wasn’t until they both started to run out of breath that he reluctantly released her, already missing her soft, warm lips against his.

He shifted over so that he sitting behind Jihyo, before pulling her in so that her back was against his chest, and wrapped both his arms around her waist. “I’m sorry for making you worry,” he sighed, and rested his chin on her shoulder.

[daxjongkook]

Holding On  || flashback || Jongkook/Jihyo

[jihyoxtlou]

[...]

“Oppa,” she said, not knowing what words would make it better.

Instead, she gently took the beer can from his hand, dealing with that first while she thought of something to say more than hollow assurances.

“You’ll regret it in the morning. You don’t need that now, I’m here,” she gently explained. 

He let her, as he always did, but reached for another right away. Jihyo smiled a little, shortly, and shifted so she could take his hand in hers instead.

“You’re not useless,” she said. “You work harder than anyone else I know, and you never give up. You caught a lot of criminals, didn’t you? Ones that would’ve gotten away if not for you. You help so many people, all the time.”

She soothingly rubbed her thumb over his hand that had been holding the beer can, bringing it to press another gentle kiss on the back of it, leaving the taste of beer on her lips.

“You’re the greatest person I know.”

[daxjongkook]

He didn’t protest when Jihyo took away his beer. She was the only one left in his life who really cared about him, and words could not describe how important she was to him.

Jihyo was right. He would definitely regret it in the morning when he wakes up. But he couldn’t help it. All the pent up frustration and disappointment were slowly driving him to edge. He absentmindedly reached out for another can, her words falling on deaf ears. 

Her hand felt surprisingly cool to the touch, a stark contrast to his as the effect of the alcohol was starting to run its way through his body. He couldn’t bear to push her hand away to bring the beer to his lips, and so he let it be.

“...it’s not enough,” he gave a wry laugh, as if mocking himself. That was a murderer they were talking about. He let a murderer got away. It didn’t matter how much petty criminals he had caught previously. No one remembered how much criminals were caught. They only remember the one that managed to get away.

He mumbled something incoherent as he lightly pulled her hand away to place the can of beer on the floor, finally looking back at Jihyo in the eyes.

He gave a sad smile, hand reaching up and caressing her cheek with his thumb. “You’re probably the only one who think I’m the greatest.” But she was all that he needed. He would do anything just to keep her safe.

[daxkwangsoo]

{ Convergence }

Stepping into the club’s premise, there was barely anyone around even though it was already late in the afternoon. It was the norms though, to which Kwangsoo thought nothing of it, since the place only opens and starts getting active around late evening.

There were a few familiar faces roaming about the empty club in preparation, and Kwangsoo greeted them enthusiastically before turning to Joongki who was trailing just slightly behind him.

“Don’t retort hyung, just agree to whatever he says and I’m sure you’ll get hired,” Kwangsoo remarked, as he rested his long limb around his best friend’s shoulder. He had half a mind to tell him not to test Jongkook’s patience, but Joongki was clever so he would know what to do.

The nightclub was anything but decent as Kwangsoo had come to realise, and full of shady people doing shady business behind closed doors. Jihyo would have killed him if she knew that he had recommended her precious brother to work here. But the pay was good. Way higher than any other places and the customers often tips generously.

And most importantly, Joongki needed the money. The club had no shortage of employees at the moment, but Kwangsoo had sincerely pestered after Jongkook until the older man agreed to let Joongki have a chance at applying for the waiter job, saying that he would be held responsible if there was any trouble. As if Joongki would cause any trouble. He was the one more likely to get into trouble instead.

Arriving at the office, Kwangsoo knocked on the door twice before pushing the door open to enter, a wide goofy smile on his face as he greeted the figure who seemed to be busy with all the paperwork on his desk.

“Hyung! I brought my friend over as I’ve said last time.”

daxjongkook  daxjoongki

[13xjingoo]

[...]

“Just say ‘yes, sir,’ got it.” Joongki fiddled with his tie one last time, making sure it was straight. This suit was his only one, and a few years old at that, purchased for another army buddy’s wedding. It was the closest thing he had to the club’s uniform, and at least he looked nice in it.

He took a deep breath in front of the office door to steady the last of his nerves. It wasn’t his first interview; it wouldn’t be his only interview, either. If this didn’t work out, he’d look elsewhere until he found something. But then Kwangsoo had the door open, and Joongki followed him into the office–

And froze just inside the threshold. For a moment, he wasn’t sure he had seen right–it had been eight years, after all, eight years since he last saw Kim Jongkook. It didn’t seem possible that he could gain even more muscle, or that he’d be sitting behind the desk in the seediest club in Seoul, or that he would just be there when Joongki actually hadn’t ever said goodbye to him.

There was no way he was going to get hired. Shit. Joongki bowed deeply anyway, and when he straightened up, he hoped that his smile masked the way his adrenaline had made his heart rate spike.

JIhyo would kill him if she found out that he had run across Jongkook and didn’t tell her. Shit.

[daxjongkook]

Frankly speaking, there wasn’t a lot of things that could easily faze the man with his years of experience and capabilities. However, this time round, he was completely taken by surprise, because there was no way he had expected to see a familiar face of his past standing right in front of him.

His face remained impassive, the facade shown to the public he had been carefully carved all these years, but inwardly there was an indescribable mix of emotions. Precious memories that had been carefully protected and stored at the back of his head was resurfacing and hitting him hard.

It was almost a relief to him that the scrawny little boy had grown so well into a man now, because it also meant that... his older sister was living well too, right? 

But darn that Kwangsoo tall kid. Why did he not mention the name of his friend that he was going to recommend for the job. If he had, he would at least be more prepared for it.

“Take a seat first,” he instructed, trying his best to keep his voice in his usual tone and gestured to the two chairs in front of his desk, before taking out a set of papers from the drawer.

“Do you have any experience in this line of work?” Jongkook kept his gaze glued at the papers in front of him, nonchalantly flipping the pages over. Joongki reminded him too much of her. “It can be quite demanding during the club’s peak hour.”

Should he really let Joongki work in the club?