delalalulu @de-lululala - Tumblr Blog

i cried today.

i know a secret. and not the dirty little kind.

what do you do when the person you tell everything to is the one person you can’t tell?

what if i’m not doing enough and i lose this? what if it’s already gone?

girlintheedirtyshirt

oh. my. god. it is hot as BALLS out here 🫠🫠

i think he wrote about me. what does it mean?

what if i stop talking to them, and suddenly lulu doesn’t exist anymore?

i don’t hate my father, i just wouldn’t want to be around him if he wasn’t my father.

i don’t hate my brother, i just think the world might be better without him.

i don’t hate my mother, i just know she resents me too much to love me right.

i don’t hate myself, i just get sick of being around me all the time. i’m never truly alone, i’m never truly isolated, i’m always there.

i don’t hate my friends, i just hate that i’m under-performing. i can feel each misstep adding up until i’m seconds from being an outcast. and i’m sure it’s all in my head but what if it isn’t.

what if they hate me? what if everyone hates me?

do i care? should i care?

what if there’s absolutely nothing wrong with me and i’m just stupid and lazy.

i know there’s nothing wrong with me, so i must be stupid and lazy.

i don’t want to be stupid and lazy, how do i fix me?

help.

it’s monday.

it’s 23:18.

11:18pm, for my american friends.

i’m tired. i should sleep. and yet i feel the need to tell you something. not sure what though.

i re-downloaded threads 20 minutes ago. my best friend writes poetry on there. i should be reading it, it’s helpful for looking into his head. his girlfriend reads it. fuck.

i don’t want to compare myself to her, but how can i not? they’ve been dating for longer than i’ve known either of them.

and she’s my other best friend. we’re a trio and i’m the third-wheel. always.

should i leave this for them? mind my business and hope he’ll tell me when something’s wrong. i can tell something wrong. when isn’t something wrong.

i can’t explain it, but i know things aren’t going well, and he’s not talking to me about it.

this isn’t your problem, and it isn’t what i wanted to talk to you about.

i wanted to tell you that i tried on my bikinis and felt sexy. that i wasn’t horrified at the thought of looking fat. and i’m not. i know. but i’m not skinny.

i tried on 4 bikinis and i felt hot, and isn’t that progress?

prom is thursday and i’m not ready.

i have a presentation thursday, i’m not ready.

i have a test tomorrow, i’m not ready.

i need it to be summer, but i also need 2-4 business weeks to get my life together before junior year is over.

and then i’m a senior and almost an adult.

i need to get him an 18th birthday present. shit.

thanks for listening, it’s 23:24. i’m going to sleep, because i have things to do.

forever caught between “i hate men” & “i want a boyfriend” 😔😔

#im just a girl #i want a boyfriend #but not really #i hate men #can we settle on a girlfriend?

cherribalm-deactivated20140609

site that you can type in the definition of a word and get the word

site for when you can only remember part of a word/its definition

site that gives you words that rhyme with a word

site that gives you synonyms and antonyms

bumblebeebabie

THAT FIRST SITE IS EVERY WRITER’S DREAM DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I’VE TRIED WRITING SOMETHING AND THOUGHT GOD DAMN IS THERE A SPECIFIC WORD FOR WHAT I’M USING TWO SENTENCES TO DESCRIBE AND JUST GETTING A BUNCH OF SHIT GOOGLE RESULTS

archivestorystuff006

OMG

dduane

This one’s an always-reblog, because who knows who needs it and hasn’t seen it yet?

you know what breaks my heart?

why i’m so glad you asked

taylor swift y’all

now don’t quote me on this cause i’m getting like third hand sources through the grapevine, but she was inducted into the hall of fame (i’m assuming the songwriters one) but instead of that being celebrated, she’s being dragged for stupid fucking drama about this girl she’s friends with.

if she were a man, lord help us all. and look, i’m no swiftie, but i think it’s time she took her revenge ifykwim.

cause this is just outragous. let her live!!!

#taylor swift #im just a girl #just a girlblog #send help #blake lively #ryan reynolds #justin baldoni #it ends with us #collen hoover #movies #director #disaster #pop music #popular #pop culture

i think my strongest trait is my complete refusal to be consistent. i’m the least reliable person i know. the reason i’m not normal about anything is because every reaction is utterly unpredictable.

#just a girlblog #march thoughts #2026