Okay perhaps this sounds odd but imagine Astarion starts to disassociate while intimate with Tav and so he uses their established safe word, only to be bewildered when Tav actually listens to him and stops and asks if he’s okay and tries to comfort him because nobody has cared that much before 😢
OH GODS WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME (i love it)
warning for suggestive content :)
For as long as Astarion's been genuinely intimate with you, for no other reasons but simply because of the affection the two of you hold for one another, he has always been in control.
It soothes him, in a way, to be on top. And as much as he enjoys watching you come undone beneath him, there's a more frustrating reason behind why he always feels the need to be the one to push you down onto whatever surface he deems decent enough at the time. From above you, he can see every little twitch in your body, every shift in your expression, and most of all, he can control what's happening, unlike his centuries spent as a seductive tool for Cazador's own needs.
He knows you're not like those fools. He knows you're different, and you're special to him. But the gnawing voice in the back of his head always forces him to pull you in, to hold you closer, to make love to you.
It's fucked up in so many ways.
"I want to make you feel as good as you make me feel."
But when you look up at him with those imploring, loving eyes, the voice seems to go quiet. He swallows the dryness of his throat, unable to think of anything but how wonderful your touch feels on his skin, and he thinks he could drown in this forever. He's putty in your hands, whether he wants to admit it or not.
"Well? Don't be a tease just standing there, darling."
In what feels like minutes, he's a mess. He's making sounds he shouldn't be making, fingertips digging into your hips as if they're the anchors keeping him from finishing too early. He breathes heavily into the crook of your neck, groaning when you caress the sharp tip of his ear between your fingers.
The only thing keeping him from spilling is the impending embarrassment he'd feel for doing so this early on in the night.
Then, everything stops.
"You're so beautiful," you whisper.
They're only words. They're not ones he's heard little of---in fact, he's heard it too much in the past two hundred years. In an instant, memories of the nights he spent under strangers, forced to shove his mind into its darkest corners just to get through their own pleasures, flood his consciousness. The sickening taste in his mouth afterward, and the need to rub his skin till it goes raw were not uncommon. It was routine. A sick part of his life that he'd rather forget.
You don't mean it the same way they did. They only said things like that because that's all they could say. They didn't know him as anything but the husk of a body he resided in. He knows you are saying the words to him. Not to his body but to the very person he is.
But the word comes spilling out his mouth, and immediately, you freeze.
You actually stopped.
Of course, you would. You're you.
"Are you okay? Did I do something?" you reach to cup either of his cheeks, and he stares at you as if you're a star that's fallen from the sky. He blinks, slowly.
"I don't know, I just---" he searches for words. "--you haven't done anything wrong, darling."
You wait for him to finish patiently. Gods, he doesn't deserve this. He doesn't deserve you.
"I only remembered something I'd rather not," he plasters a crooked grin on his face. "It's quite alright. We can continue now if I haven't ruined the mood."
You pull away from him, and he fears you'll leave.
Moments later, you return with a glass of water. Wordlessly, you hand it to him, and he only stares at it, confused beyond belief. Only once he notices the way you gesture to the glass does he drink it, and you finally climb back into bed, lying down beside him.
"Come here," you open your arm, motioning him to come closer.
"Darling, as much as I'm all for experimenting, that's a strange position to have sex in."
You smile, shaking your head. You don't explain any further, only continuing to hold out your arm.
Hesitant though curious, he slowly lies down beside you, his head just above your chest and slotted between the space below your chin. With gentle hands, you pull him closer and toss the blanket over both of your bodies.
It's warm. Strange, but warm.
"You don't have to wear a mask with me," you whisper.
His eyes grow wide, and his chest stills. He doesn't have many tears left after 239 years, but there's an unfamiliar squeeze in his chest that tells him if he were still 39 and alive, he might have. Astarion wraps his arms around your waist, burying his face into where he can hear the steady beating of your heart.
Later, when your eyes begin to droop, he mumbles.
"Tell me I'm beautiful again."
"You're beautiful," you say softly. "With or without your pretty face."
You might be imagining it, but you feel him smile against your skin.
Listen it's so funny because Sasuke has an innate and objective sense of goodness and kindness, it's just that he cannot indulge it when his own circumstances are so unjust and require so much of his attention. During his team 7 days we see no overt declarations of love and support, but we see over and over the little details of care. He got worried when Naruto didn't eat, when Sakura was feeling insecure, and he went and did something about it. During his Orochimaru days he acts cold and aloof, but won't kill anyone he fights in training despite his stated goal being he'd do anything for power. He has a very clear moral compass, he just can't consciously examine it or declare it because it gets in the way of his ambition to avenge his family.
Meanwhile Naruto? Needs to be taught his ideals. Over and over again we see him struggle with himself. Haku taught him the idea of "precious people," Sasuke taught him sacrifice when he wanted to run against Gaara (honestly kind of a bad thing but not for this post). Naruto sneers and derides the villains he fights and then needs to connect their strife with his own to care, to extend his empathy. He has to learn to care.
Sasuke just....does.
And it's so funny because for Sasuke it holds him back! If he didn't have this moral compass he could do so much more! In fact, his ambition to kill Naruto was supposed to be a symbolic end to his morality, which is why he pursued it so much, but when push came to shove he just simply couldn't go through with it; his morality innate.
Meanwhile Naruto's morality is so tied to Sasuke that to see him die would feel like a moral failure, and that's why he goes so hard for him! He's Naruto's moral center: he discovered his beliefs through Sasuke. He just simply cannot believe Sasuke is evil and irredeemable because so much of his own sense of righteousness is built on what he learned through Sasuke.
Sasuke's sense of morality is innate to him and it gets in his way, while Naruto's sense of morality is learned through Sasuke and is what gets in the way of writing off Sasuke as a bad person (like everyone else does).
i want to preface this by saying i enjoy darkfic >>>> fluff or humor so this may not be your usual rec list. i have read a lot of the popular fics recced by others but they are not the sort of things i enjoy reading. that isn’t to say they aren’t good - i’m thankful for anyone who contributes to fandom with their gifts BUT i am creating this because there are so many good fics out there that are underrated and undiscovered.
every writer has their niche and i hope you can find something new here that interests you!
SNS
Tabula Rasa by some_random
“The jutsu will seal everything a ninja has ever learnt. It’ll be like him getting a blank slate,” Tsunade folded her hands and leaned forward to rest her chin against her knuckles, “Tabula rasa.”
In which, Sasuke’s memories are temporarily wiped after the war as part of his incarceration.
i love this so very much. the plot is genius and it’s hurt/comfort in the best way.
U-Turn by IsolaVirtuosa
Naruto’s pretty sure he’s straight.
reads really realistically and it’s like a hot bowl of chicken soup. very comforting and easy to read.
simple glory by kincaidian
Directly after Itachi’s death, Sasuke is captured by and forced to join Root, under Danzou’s command. What follows are three years of relentless fighting, with one goal in mind: Naruto’s safety. A story of priorities and homecomings.
chef’s kiss these types of canon divergent fics are so amazing and this is my fave anbu/root sasuke fic.
The Spaces Between Us by stripeypirate
The year is 1985. Sakura Haruno waitresses at a local diner and wonders if dropping out of nursing school means she’ll be stuck in sleepy, small-town Bedford Falls for the rest of her life, forever in her best friend’s shadow. Sasuke Uchiha’s a man on the run, thrust into a world deeper and darker than he ever anticipated.
The chilly Northwestern wind brings change as lives collide, and hearts are bared (as well as broken). The Double R Diner sits at the center of it all- but its foundation will need to be strong enough to weather the storm
(Falling in love with your best friend can be just as bad as falling in love with your worst enemy).
i don’t read many AUs and enjoy even fewer of them (every AU i like is here) but this is one i will rec forever because the atmosphere is sublime and the plot is tight.
After The World Fell Down by zephyras13
Naruto has been fighting a war for the life of his neighborhood for the past four years, with no end in sight. His world is violent, arbitrary, and ruthless, but it is simple. It makes sense. And then Uchiha Sasuke fucks everything up.
another modern-ish AU and such an underrated piece that made me cry at the end. it is really emotional and that good.
Vertigo by aurrai
Five years after Sasuke leaves the village, he comes back of his own accord and no one knows why. Captured and put under house arrest, Tsunade tells Naruto, Sakura, and Sai to live with him, take care of him, and make him better. But Sasuke isn’t the same Sasuke they remember.
idk if i can say i recommend this or not because i didn’t have fun reading it, but the execution and writing and how the story unfolds is astonishing. there are some fics that are easy to read and digest, and this is not one of them. you read some fics because you need to.
definitely not something i will reread and even for someone who prefers darkfic, this is unflinchingly dark. but good. very good. naruto and sasuke’s relationship is built upon shared trauma and an undercurrent of darkness (and that’s the main reason why i love them so much) and this explores their relationship in all its dysfunctional glory.
NON SNS
Monomoth by Ohtze
Everything ends, eventually. Eight years after the war, Sakura’s unhinged and Sasuke’s obsessed. The fields are filled with corpses. AUish, canon-divergent, Sakura-centric.
this is tagged as SS but it reads more like a sasuke character study (and a sakura one). it’s cosmic horror which is really hard to write and it’s so dark, creepy and surreal and one of the few fics that have really stayed with me. imo it’s a must-read for those interested in a realistic, darker sasuke whose fate is not intertwined with naruto’s.
Dogs by bizzylizzy
There were the Uchiha.
There were the Dogs: those Uchiha of disreputable age and intent under constant scrutiny of ANBU.
And then there were Itachi and Shisui.
this lives in my head rent-free. i would be going about my day and randomly i’ll think about this and it’ll just crush me. it explores the political implications of the uchiha’s existence in konoha and it’s incredibly dark and real. i cannot state how dark this is and i love it a lot a lot a lot.
also there is just something about this title and how short and simple it is that is so effective after title after title of pretty sentences and accompanying parenthesises.
Pssst do you have any Shisui/Itachi fanfic recs? Or recs in general?
I’m afraid there won’t be any surprises here, since fanfiction.net is the only site I’m familiar with and my selection is somewhat limited to m-rated fics most of the time. That being said, here are my favorites.
Given that you are a sexy Eruri connoisseur, so you have any sexy Eruri headcanons on their sexual styles, their kinks, whether they're rough or gentlegentle, fave positions, etc
Headcanons? I can do better than that, I can give you whole fucking fics! :}
They switch. All. The. Time. Depending on moods and needs. (Payback)
Before meeting Erwin, Levi’s sexual encounters were casual, perfunctory and devoid of emotional connection. That all changed when he met Erwin, and it terrifies him. (Keep Yourself Warm, Loosing It, Shards)
Levi accepts pain willingly, expects it even, but it takes Erwin to teach him to accept gentleness. (Capitulation + Acceptance)
Erwin is not good at articulating his own needs, so Levi learns to read him closely, and what he learns is that sometimes Erwin needs to be put down. Hard. (Wait, Penitence + Absolution)
Levi is ticklish. Erwin is the only one who knows this and doesn’t hesitate to exploit the advantage. (Achilles’ Heel)
Fucking standing up is difficult because of their height difference, so Erwin is always keeping an eye out for things Levi can stand on. Levi scowls and tells him to fuck off, but he steps up without complaint.
Boot kink. Levi has one. (Finding It, Pooling)
Erwin loves to watch Levi unraveling. He never tires of seeing Levi coming apart beneath him until he’s a sweating, writhing wreck. (Still)
Levi allows Erwin to pick him up and fuck him against the wall. He’s the only one he’s ever allowed to do this and, though he’d never admit it, he fucking loves it.
Breath play is the ultimate expression of the mutual trust and devotion they share. (Breathe)
Erwin adores fucking Levi in the morning when he’s warm and pliant and smells faintly of sleep and sweat. (Eucalyptus, All these years, The same, warmer)
Levi is capable of shocking gentleness and it cuts Erwin to the quick. (Cardamom)
Erwin is a terrible voyeur. He loves to watch Levi masturbating and he has discretely and strategically positioned mirrors in his quarters so he can watch while they fuck. Levi gets horribly embarrassed and Erwin loves to see the flush of pink spreading down his neck and over his chest. (The Price You Pay)
Levi is vocal during sex, but when he comes, he’s completely silent.
Intercrual sex. Levi loves fucking Erwin’s thighs. The heat, the pressure, the rasp of hair against his dick turns him on unbearably. (Wall of Death)
She makes a shit ton of poses (like 16,000 or some crazy nonsense). I used this lovely lady to draw so much as a teen. Whether it was some nerdy pose for my Mary Sue as fuck OCs
or for full on fight sequences
or for tragic deaths of my OCs in the arms of a totally OOC main protagonist.
this bitch hooked me up.
And with the wildest, craziest stuff that you could see in your head but had no way or resources to reasonably draw like
or this
or this
DUDE! INASNE SHIT!! So I was using her for a pose reference and decided, you know what, I owe this bitch some cash. Lemme dole it out for her. BUT then, I looked and saw she only has 286 fucking patrons!! This chick gives out free shit and spends countless hours arranging these shoots and setting this stuff up.
I’ll fork up the cash, SenshiStock. You’re worth it.
Check out this amazing woman’s stuff, and get knowledged: https://www.deviantart.com/senshistock
Interrupting my regular Star Wars BS to reblog this because @senshistock is amazing and beyond worth the follow and support! I first started using her refs gosh I want to say back in maybe 2008, and I’m happy to be a supporter of her over on Patreon. If you’re an artist please go find her stuff on all the platforms, you will not regret it!
Yessss, she is so awesome! Been following her for years. My favorite stock artist is jademacalla, who is, incidentally, in the last two images above. He has a lot of great angles, costumes, gear, etc! I love his hands, too.
Hi! Can you please rec the best modern AU eruri fics? I just read one and now I’m hooked for this type of content 😊 Thank you in advance!
Hi Anon! Another fic rec ask from the archives :} There are so many amazing modern AUs it’s hard to know where to start. Just to narrow things down a bit I’m not going to include reincarnation fics or any fics that involve supernatural elements, but I’m taking a fairly loose definition of “modern” XD
Aisle 10 by orphan account
all your demons and desires and dark sides by Carthage
An Education by @stereobone
Animals by @stereobone
Building on the Past by @lostcauses-noregrets
Cardamom by @lostcauses-noregrets
CODA by @tidal-sehnsucht
Current Location by @thefangirlingdead
Eruri Broomverse by @lostcauses-noregrets, @huxandthehound and @elivra-fanfiction
Final Tour by @ackbang
For a Loop by @ellabesmirched
Four Years Later by @everythingshiny
I wish the sea would wash you away (then bring you back to me) by kusuriuri
I’m only going to heaven (if it feels like hell) by @stereobone
pixelskylines
kaledo-art
discoholicmusic
annaxmalina
vaporwave
