Dead Fish of Tinder

Dead fish... or worse.

[deadfishoftinder]

I just don't think "well educated" and "sarcasim" should be in the same sentence.

[deadfishoftinder]

If you can't tell from Tyler's photo and his proximity to me, I'm back in Minnesota. Brb, going to see if lumberjacksoftinder.tumblr.com is available.

[deadfishoftinder]

Brandon is following ONE piece of Wren's advice. The dead deer wasn't on my list of approved items though.

[deadfishoftinder]

Gentlemen, take note. (And ladies, control yourselves.) Wren is KILLING the dead fish game. If you would like your profile to achieve Wren-levels of godliness, follow his simple, proven steps to success: 1. Use your (one) dead fish pic to showcase your making out/cuddling skills. 2. Include photos with cute/alive animals to show off your sensitive side. 3. Be smart enough to get published in the fucking Journal of Molecular Microbiology (good luck). 4. Show off the super cute things you do, like boating with your super cute friends. 5. Grow a beautiful mane of hair and work on your winning smile. Lesser gentlemen, good luck. Wren, thank you for all that you do for the world of dead fish.

[urie]

men are honestly so dumb it’s enchanting

[demonelfprincess]

This is like magic

[thirstyboyzofokcupid]

Lmfao idiot

[deadfishoftinder]

Doesn't every girl want a guy with humour?

[deadfishoftinder]

Hey, love the tumblr! My friend and I made this video for a laugh and thought you'd appreciate it. 

[itsdansheehan]

[deadfishoftinder]

I'd say that counts as a pun.

[softntinder-blog-blog-deactivat]

Otto - its a joke, get it

[deadfishoftinder]

Love a good tinder pun.

[searchingfortinderella]

And look who I found!

[deadfishoftinder]

Hodor?

[deadfishoftinder]

Yaassss Cody good job. Maybe cuteboyswithcuteanimals.com should be a thing.

[deadfishoftinder]

Took a vaycay to the Pacific Northwest, can't get away from boys with dead fish tho. They're everywhere, America.

[tinderwinners]

If you swipe right, the screen immediately just fills with badass flames and sammy hagar screaming. See also: fill up on donkey sauce; swipe right to be taken to Flavortown.

[deadfishoftinder]

celebritiesoftinder how do you feel about c-list (d-list? f-list??) celebrities ?

[girlswithgunsoftinder]

Fish Guts and Gunpowder: The new fragrance by Calvin Klein.

[deadfishoftinder]

What if Marly found the love of her life from looking at deadfishoftinder? True love from two snarky tinder blogs.... There's a rom-com waiting to be written.

[girlswithgunsoftinder]

YOU’RE GOD DAMNED RIGHT IT ISN’T. Also, WHERE IS MY OUIJA BOARD?!

[deadfishoftinder]

Really into girlswithgunsoftinder right now. This grl is KILLING IT (get it?!)

[deadfishoftinder]

That's a little presumptuous. Why does he assume I want a guy with a good heart?

[deadfishoftinder]

Unlike your picture and tagline, at least your name is appropriate.