I have complicated feelings about the way paraphilic attractions are discussed online… especially in the radqueer community.
I do not believe someone should be abused, harassed, or driven away from treatment merely because they experience an attraction they did not choose especially when they have never harmed anyone and are actively committed to never doing so. Shame and isolation can make prevention harder. People need professional help, coping resources, and spaces focused on accountability and harm prevention. At the same time, I am uncomfortable when attractions involving people or beings who cannot consent are presented primarily as identities to celebrate. Support and destigmatized access to treatment are not the same thing as treating every attraction as harmless or morally neutral, My discomfort with certain flags and labels is not simply “the flag looks like pride.” It is that these symbols can blur the line between supporting non-offending people and normalizing the attraction itself. They can also be used by individuals who romanticize, excuse, or openly desire real harm, which damages the credibility and safety of prevention-focused communities. I think these spaces need stronger boundaries and possibly a complete rebranding, clearly anti-contact, anti-abuse, pro-treatment, pro-accountability, and centered on protecting potential victims. No sexualization of real minors, no encouragement of offending, no minimizing the inability to consent, and no treating legitimate safety concerns as persecution.
People who want help should be able to receive it without being dehumanized. But compassion for someone struggling with an attraction must never become ambiguity about abuse. The priority should always be prevention, consent, and the safety of children and other vulnerable beings. In other words, I feel as if people within these communities need to start making new flags for these disorders and instead of labeling them as something that is a harmless attraction, it needs to be labeled as a disorder something to be managed, something to be controlled, something to heal from, instead of something to endorse. And I know I’m probably gonna get slack for this but this is just how I feel….
#THIS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AGREE
