Trans man. Gay. Dandy. Author of fantasy, romance, and erotica with a big focus on queer and disabled characters. He/him/his. This blog is 18+. www.JohannesTEvans.co.uk
Hello, I'm Johannes T. Evans, and I am a gay, disabled, trans man who writes a bunch!
There are hundreds of pieces available for free on my website as well as subscription-only content - here's a selection of free works for you to check out:
FREE ESSAYS:
How Much I, A Queer Self-Published Indie Author, Made In A Year (2025)
Gregory House, Disabled Bastard, in House MD Season 1
I Am Bad Representation
Ringing The Devil’s Doorbell: A Light-Hearted, Practical Guide to Vaginal & Vulvar Stimulation
What’s In A Uniform?: Imperial Attitudes Reflected in Starfleet’s Uniforms
FREE ROMANCE FICTION:
Dirk and the Weaver — 12k, rated M, MB. A shopkeeper slowly comes to fall for a weaver when he comes to town. Slow romance and fantasy short between a shopkeeper in an isolated Scottish village, and a weaver that comes up from somewhere way down south.
Sweet On — 7k, rated M, M/M. A chocolatier falls head over heels for one of his most austere customers. A very exuberant chocolatier crushes on desperately on the deadpan professor who begins coming into his shop for coffee. Autism for autism and lots of flirting and teasing.
Deep Breath — 7k, M/M, rated M. A painter is utterly obsessed with the butcher across the road, and the butcher is a little obsessed back. Lots of mental illness in this one, lots of reference — implicit and explicit — to suicidality, drug use, alcoholism, sexual assault and rape, ableism, consent issues, including past child sexual abuse, all in the context of a victim in recovery whilst also being in active addiction.
FREE FANTASY FICTION:
The Lord of the Wood’s Spring Bride — 10k, rated M. MB. A trans dressmaker is embroiled in the strange schemes of a local deity, and he lets himself be carried away with the tide.
Gellert’s New Job — 21k, rated M. MB. Gellert Osgodby has worked as a business manager for the King family for nearly a decade when an error in judgement brings his employment to an abrupt end. Lucien Pike, a rival kingpin, employs his services instead.
A Stranger’s Visit — 3.6k, rated T. MB. A priest of Freyr receives a strange visitation. A little bit of Norse godliness versus Norse priestliness.
FREE EROTIC FICTION:
Academic Incentive — Rated E, M/M, 3.6k. A magical professor spreads one of his student’s holes for the education of the rest of the class ahead of a special incentive program — where the lowest scoring examination participant is used as sexual relief by the rest of his peers. Featuring voyeurism, public sex, fingering, anal play, anal sex, size kink, begging, a bit of overstim and tears, public use.
Caught — Cis M/trans M/cis M, 3.2k. MB. A thief is caught in the treasury and his punishment is delivered by the guards on duty. Unadulterated porn without plot — dubious consent, anal, vaginal, and oral sex, spitroasting, size difference, rough sex, fingering, messy sex with a bit of squirting and also messy oral, double penetration (vaginal/oral and vaginal/anal), crying, mindbreak, pussy spanking, spanking, some nipple play. Unsafe sex, no prophylactics or contraceptives are used or mentioned.
Archival Management — 10k, M/M, MB. An archivist with a messy life finds himself intensively managed by his sexy, older boss. Magical archivists in Camelot with the most mundane of delicious emotional and sexual issues. Featuring age difference, orgasm denial, oral, desperation, crying, a bit of mild humour and nastiness, delicious emotional manipulation, and a heavy dose of mind-reading.
A Gift for the Wolfmen — 6.4k, rated E. Two trans men, both being gangbanged by four cis wolfmen with huge cocks. Fantasy universe with adventurers and so forth. Featuring stuck-through-wall and grope boxes, body writing, vaginal, oral, and anal play, huge come inflation, size difference, knotting, power dynamics, virginity kink, objectification and dehumanisation, degradation, humiliation, breeding kink, body modification, mentions of lactation and pregnancy, and enthusiastic consent throughout.
FREE HORROR FICTION:
Ambitious Men — Rated M. MB. 11.6k. Archie had idolised Casper Hugo almost his entire life. Deeply fucked up fantasy-horror, wherein a man finds that his dream of taking over his hero’s restaurant is not to proceed as smoothly as he hoped.
Wild Country — 3k, Gen, rated T. A young woman walks home on a foggy night.
The Widower’s Garden — 12.5k, Rated M, MB. After a man is widowed, his husband begins to appear at the foot of his garden every night. Content warnings for horror, violence, trauma, infidelity, nasty guys being nasty.
No, you see, I wish to be an author. Not in marketing. Or an influencer. I wish to tell my stories, be told I did a fantastic job, and then go back to my hovel to scribble some more. I am delicate of constitution and awkward in crowds.
A prince is used as an egg sac by a dangerous ocean colony.
Claudia, the long-suffering personal guard of his highness, Prince Amrit, has to go and collect him when the idiot gets himself captured by a colony of merpeople that like to use humans and elves to store their eggs in.
Rated E, 4.6k. Trans M (post-top surgery and post-universe equivalent penile implant and ovary-to-teste conversion) filled with eggs offscreen by a colony of merpeople, and then forced birth and sadism from his bodyguard, a cis F warrior. Belly inflation, oviposition, forced birth, sadomasochism, power dynamics in reverse, body horror, etc.
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On my website - subscribers only, but subscription starts at $1.01 per year
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When Amrit had shown her the resource packet on these fucking things, she had been horrified just at reading the basic description of them. They were technically related to merpeople, although the commentary in the resource packet from other merfolk had said that they suspected them to be either insular or less socially advanced than other merfolk.
In this area, they called them the tarander: they formed raft-like colonies of algae that floated on sea currents, and they only came ashore to breed. The colonies typically had established breeding areas and would return to them on a regular cycle: other colonies formed their own egg sacs from the same algae they made their rafts from and put them in shallow waters where they would be warmed by the sun, or stored their sacs near geothermal vents to make use of their heat, or even came ashore to set their sacs in hot springs.
All of that was fine – Claudia wasn’t particularly interested in marine biology or magical zoology, but she could understand why such things were researched, even passionately researched.
Then she had turned the page, and read about how this subset of the tarander achieved warmth for their gestating young by capturing warm-blooded merfolk, or humans or elves or orcs, how they had developed a method of keeping these captured subjects not just alive, but fed and watered, whilst using them to store their eggs.
Whilst floating in their currents, the tarander would capture fish and squid and octopus, the larger colonies even capturing whales, and anaesthetise them, keep them alive whilst eating them alive. They’d figured out how to apply this process to breeding subjects, and at least didn’t fucking eat them, as a rule.
No one had ever studied the phenomenon up close, not with any scientific rigour – they had diary entries and reports from survivors of the process, a few sketches of how the breeding colony looked when in place, and most of all, there were sketches and diagrams of those who did not survive.
Who drowned.
Or starved.
Or ruptured.
“It’s not as if I’m going to volunteering to be a subject,” Amrit had said, “we’re going to disguise the tent, we’re just going to observe as they capture—”
“The Surprise of a Knight,” the first known queer “stag film,” shows how gender, sexuality and desire have always been fluid
Waugh recalls, on his first watch, being “delighted by the unexpectedness of this glimpse into [the lead character’s] world,” and he’s drawn conclusions about this onscreen heroine after careful study. “She was a trans sex worker, obviously,” he says, “very beautiful and very much in possession of herself. The film is very frank about her fucking, as well as her costume performance and the revelation. I think there were a few rare glimpses of trans characters [in stag films], but this was unique.”
running joke between transformers where they send each other various photos of human celebrities and say shit like Me if i was a human. and they lose their mind laughing everytime it never gets old. they never show it to their human companions because they’re a little worried they’ll get offended but what they dont know is that any human would lose their fucking mind laughing if a giant alien robot who turns into a terrain mitsubishi sent them a picture of lindsey lohan and was like My sexy humansona. we’d love that shit
step one: replace entire personality with open, festering wound
step two: contort absolutely all stimuli in my environment to relate to the my wound in some manner, ideally one which justifies random acts of unbridled aggression and vengeance
Me begging my body to keep the inflammatory response to a minimum after i go for a cemetery walk arguably too soon after my last one and i can feel the Fatigue setting in
The funniest part of DS9's Civil Defense is that there were so many pre-recorded messages. Like Dukat thought a slave revolt was so likely he took the time to pre-record a bunch of messages about it. But better than that is Legate Kell thought Dukat losing control of the station and trying to flee was so likely that he took the time to record a message telling Dukat to stop being a coward.
Like how many other pre-recorded messages were just chilling in DS9's computer?
These were produced from around the time of the Roman annexation of Egypt in the late 1st century BC to around the Christianization of the Roman Empire in the 3rd century CE.
They were a continuation of the Egyptian tradition of funerary masks but rather than sculpting them and making them of precious metals, they began painting these lifelike portraits.
It’s hotly debated whether this is an example of Greco-Roman realist style imposed on their subjects, or a home grown Egyptian development of their own ancient tradition. Those who say it’s more Egyptian than Roman point out that there’s no surviving paintings in the rest of the Roman Empire that were this realistic. Those who say it’s more Roman than Egyptian point out the arid climate left these portraits intact, and beleive the others in the rest of the empire were lost.
Personally I think you can call them Egyptian because these people, whether of Roman or ancient Egyptian descent, are still the ancestors of the modern Egyptians today.
Despite the realism you can see a slight exaggeration of the eyes, smoothing of the skin and inclusion of certain important objects around the subject’s head. It’s a pattern that would get more and more pronounced until it became the style of Byzantine iconography in the Orthodox Christian Church
Post to tumblr your Valvert content during the designated week, tagging this blog ( @valvertweek ) and, if you want, add the tag #valvert week. I will check the tag daily but it's better to tag the blog since tumblr is bad at searching tags.
Belated works will get reblogged too, just less often.
What type of media can you post?
All media types are accepted. Fanart, fanfic, fancam, playlist, plushie, Arm Joe playthrough, moodboard, cosplay, gifset, POV tiktok, embroidering etc.
- For Fics:
If you post to AO3 or other fanfiction site please post a link to the fic with a short summary or a short snippet and content warnings if applicable.
Short fics can be posted directly on tumblr if you want. Longer fics I recommend using an external link, but they'll be reblogged either way.
- Reblogging old work/ reposting:
Posting your old stuff is also accepted. The point of the week is to have fun and share your work.
Following the theme:
This year we're trying something different: we have both a Theme and a Prompt List! Following either of them is totally optional. I do recommend trying it tho because it's fun!
NSFW Content and Warnings:
This blog will not curate the content reblogged during the week, so there may be content you disagree with/ dislike.
I will tag any NSFW content as such, and any trigger warnings I see fit (for example: 'suicide tw' for mention of it or implied). Feel free to ask me to tag something in particular.
