DEFUNCT BAGEL

go to @eldritch-blasted-bagels for current shit

[defunct-bagel]

I come bearing shitposts.

Inspired by this picture I found on Pinterest:

This is also what made me realize that Astarion and Bela Lugosi’s Dracula have almost identical facial structures.

[hobicat]

What if the circus of the last days had a magician?

[mostwantedpotato404]

What can go wrong? The squad have everything under control!

That toke me so many hours n fixes to complete. It's silly, it's chaotic and maybe not everything makes perfect sense but it's my ultimate bby:3

[defunct-bagel]

If I had a nickel for every character I kinned that was essentially a vampire underling, in a centuries long abusive relationship with a narcissistic vampire, and whose arc was about suddenly learning how to live free and heal, I’d have two nickels, which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice.

[haykebyr]

yes it may be the year of our lord 2024 but that won't stop me from making vine references

[tackypies]

every time i think about how people steal wyll's romantic gestures + desire to have a family + everything they gush about in their mega ooc fluff headcanons for their white men but absolutely refuse to engage with wyll in any way bc he's just the token black character to them

[starr-ghost]

*lemony snicket voice* police cars say ‘protect and serve’ for the same reason a box of dry, unflavoured rice cakes might say ‘delicious treat’. rice cakes are not a delicious treat, nor are the police there to protect and serve, but if you are unfamiliar with either you’re likely to believe what you’re told.

[asterofthesapphires]

Larian missed out on a big opportunity in BG3. When Astarion is brooding about not being able to see his reflection you should be able to offer to draw him and the DC is super high for you to succeed but if you fail you just end up making some shit like this

Can you fuckin imagine how funny this would be omg.

[rebe-draws]

Campaign 1 of Critical Role will forever have a special place in my heart so here is some Keyleth fan-art ✨

[ur-daily-inspiration]

Pigeon wings under a UV light

[crazy-pages]

"The secret invisible light we cannot directly perceive creates beautiful vaguely rune-like shaped on the religiously significant appendages of an otherwise mundane animal" yeah get out of here, tone down the fantasy vibes a little bit, that's too much. Oh wait that's reality? ... Well then.

[n0ahsferatu]

i love my puter all my friends are inside it

[asunnydisposish]

They're just little guys... 👀

[theemotionalgnome]

Pairing Astarion based off these kinds of paintings

[defunct-bagel]

My ass, who has an effective af gloomstalker sharpshooter in my bg3 play through, watching my wizard-main husband stumble through combat and constantly die.

[kricherr]

No reason for it to be this funny

[akaerma]

The Ascension of St Barcus

RIP Little Homie

You were too pure for this world.

[enchanted-by-the-reaper]

✨majestic✨