well… this was unexpected. you blink once, twice, in response to ike’s words. they’re not unkind– despite the rather stoic expression and gruff tone, the question is one born of kindness. all the same your smile fades, replaced by a furrowed brow and tilt of the head– a clear display of confusion. he thinks… you’re doing too much? honestly, it feels like too little.
it’s felt like too little for a very long time. too little, too late… unable to please everyone, unable to avoid hurting those you love no matter what you try, unable to escape the maze… how long has it been now? you can hardly remember… all you know is that you cannot stop, you cannot give up, no matter how little your actions amount to in the grand scheme of things…
is it any wonder that you’d want to reduce the burden you’re placing on those who chose to follow you as much as possible? not that you could ever explain to sir ike in full just why you’re determined to on so much responsibility… he would think you delusional.
this time, though, a little voice in the corner of your mind whispers, this time things may be different.
the spark of hope flickering in your chest helps you return a gaze you hadn’t realized you’d dropped when the mercenary spoke, and another soft, albeit awkward chuckle slips past rosy lips.
“it can be a little difficult to keep up, i’ll admit, but i’m used to it. i can manage. if worst comes to worst, i know i can ask jakob or felicia for help– or even gunter,” you shake your head, a hand resting against your forearm lightly. “i would feel guilty asking others to pick up my slack, though. this is what’s expected of me. whether it’s fair or not, i don’t want to let everyone down…”
more than you already have. but again, this goes unspoken. you mustn’t burden ike with your thoughts– he’s already doing so much by fighting for a cause you can’t speak of fully, beyond “ending the war between nohr and hoshido by seeking out the one who truly instigated it”. he could have been on his way after that friendly match, but he’d instead asked to travel with you… how could you possibly burden him further when he’s not even from here but getting involved in the continent’s affairs anyways? it feels… disrespectful. ungrateful. like a waste of his time.
you don’t want to waste his time.
“thank you. i appreciate it, truly. you’re very sweet to offer. i was unsure if i ought to approach about this sort of thing– you may be one of my soldiers, but you are also my guest. i was… afraid of appearing rude when you’re already doing more than i could ever ask just by lending me your strength. if you truly wish to do more, i will keep it in mind. … is there really nothing i can do for you in turn? anything to make your time here more comfortable?”
there is one thing you’d like to ask for some help with, actually, but you’re uncertain he’d be willing to help with something so… trivial in comparison to all your other duties.
Ike’s brows furrows as she replies. Is this another noble thing?? Araceli is a princess, so naturally Ike would think there would be vassals and soldiers scrambling left and right to make sure she needn’t get her hands dirty... but there weren’t. He knows well enough now that princesses can fight, and they can be damn good at it too, but that doesn’t make up for all the other duties she shoulders on her own.
She means well, at the very least. But she’s clearly naive, and Ike knows that if she keeps this up, she’ll end up even worse than she thinks.
❝ I’m not a guest, ❞ he replies. He levels her with a steely gaze -- but it’s typical for Ike. ❝ I’m a mercenary. I’ll sleep in whichever cot you give me, for however long it takes to wrap things up.
❝ And you’re not supposed to be taking on every problem as you see it. ❞
He shifts a bit. He knows what its like to be so obsessed with the idea of being a good leader that you forget all the people ready and willing to help. There’s a reason why people have advisers and staff officers and tacticians, and it isn’t because they’ve failed at doing it all themselves. At this rate, it’s just a matter of time before Araceli crashes and burns and people either get hurt for it, or she gets even more torn up over no longer being able to continue like this. Ike hasn’t just seen it before: he’s lived it.
❝ You can’t tell me every one expects you to work yourself to the grave. If anything, we’re all counting on you to stay healthy and ready to give us orders. You can tell people what to do to help and make everything work out, and if they expect you to do it yourself just because you’re leading them, they’re just lazy.
❝ It’s unfair to you, and everyone under you. If you fall, everything else goes with you, and working yourself like this is an easy way to get there. ❞
Even if his choice of words are blunt, and his tone of voice a little sharp, he speaks from a place of sincerity. He watches her closely, gauging her reaction.
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