discourse sideblog

call me coyote. he - him. mlm. 17. i don't have an about so if you want to know something else lmk.

[scarred-and-purrfect]

okay everyone, it’s time to clear some stuff up

Alright. So as many of you may know, this post has been going around: 

Now, I saw this and I was super confused because–I had no idea who would call me an abuser or why. So I contacted @callmegoddess618 to see if it was a misunderstanding:

So after a lot of back-and-forth, she told me who had brought this up:

I was super confused, because like–my ex and I were on pretty decent terms last time I checked. I asked a friend of mine to text her and ask what was going on–I knew it probably wasn’t actually her, because there was no way she’d make those kinds of claims.

He asked her what happened between us, sent some screenshots

I’ll drop in here and say it wasn’t exactly the most tactful way of approaching the situation, but my friend was stressed and I was stressed and that’s just how it be sometimes.

Anyway so my friend sent me these screenshots–I’m pretty confident that it should be enough to prove I’m not an abuser. @callmegoddess618 I’m gonna say it again–I’m not an abuser, I swear. In fact, my ex even SAID it wasn’t her saying those things, and that it was someone else pretending to be her.

Look, the idea of someone PRETENDING to be a person so close to me and also paint me as an abuser is–really upsetting? I’m sure you understand that. I swear to God, I didn’t do anything 

[queerfemme]

Normally I would be quick to jump to OP’s defense, but something just doesn’t feel right. 

I don’t like the way her friend is asking these questions. It’s incredibly invasive, and refusing to give her ex a name despite knowing theirs reeks of manipulative power play. 

Not to mention the startlingly legitimate points @excalibelle makes in this version of the post. 

I’d be much more open-minded if I didn’t know exactly who you were talking about, and, based on our conversations about this, how terrified they really are of YOU. 

But tbqh what bothers me the most is your last response–”I swear to God I didn’t do anything” are the words of someone whose worst fear is getting caught, not of having become so sick and twisted that you abuse someone and don’t even realize you’re doing it–or maybe, you just don’t see anything wrong with it at all. 

[curiouscarnifex]

…I haven’t read through all the sources bc there’s a lot so I don’t want to comment on that but uh @lesbiandrogynous I am super uncomfortable with you assertion that “I swear to god I didn’t do anything” means the person is guilty because I know people who say things the that effect when accused of stuff and pretty much all of them are abuse survivors who are used to people bringing hell down on them for no reason, or being accused of and blamed for things they’ve never done by abusers to get more control over them.

[queerfemme]

No offense meant, but if I may be frank, that’s exactly the phrase all of my abusers used when they found out what I had accused them from. I wasn’t implying everyone who says that is guilty, but I think it’s certainly fucked up that you’d accuse me and other victims of abuse of lying to make someone look bad. 

[descqnt]

re: first reblog (“how scared [they] are of you”) so you’re in contact with moonbian ?

[angelicguy]

hes mad as hell

[jonbutter]

the thing is we’re more happy to make fun of shen than he is mad to be getting made fun of so it all balances out

[spider-hands-mannos-deactivated]

y'all leave him alone he doesnt deserve this shit

[thathighclassbitch]

Its pretty funny tho

[spider-hands-mannos-deactivated]

Not really. It’s not really funny that people constantly shit on him because his comics have gone from pessimistic to optimistic in outlook, and its not really all that funny that people genuinely harass him over his comics and state of mind. Its in fact pretty much just immature high school bully shit, which makes sense because thats what lies at the core of tumblr, is people who wanted to be bullies finding a way to do it.

[pathesis]

^^^^

[endoraptor-moved]

Y’all people hate him cause he defends pedophiles not cause he got happy

[descqnt]

sources??

[palominocorn]

This is just your aggressively friendly reminder that “cishet aces” and “cishet aros” don’t exist.

“Cishet” was a word coined by trans people meant to describe someone who has full, unconditional access to straight privilege - that is, someone who is 100% perisex, cisgender, heterosexual, and heteroromantic. 

If you use cishet to refer to a-specs, you are using it wrong.

If you’re cis and you’re using it, you are stealing our language on top of using it wrong.

[vixpeo-deactivated20260113]

just saying that accusation is not fact. Just because someone accuses you of doing something does not mean you did it. Can we please stop this guilty until proven innocent? Let George at least say his side of the story before we all just immediately assume he’s guilty.

[descqnt]

haha thanks for shoving victims like me under the bus for your fav!

[zooophagous]

Thinkin about writing a grotesque little children’s book about decomp and what happens to a body after death about a kid’s dead pet hamster and the remarkable journey it goes on post mortem

[descqnt]

how old? kids final stage of understanding death is around nine, i believe. anything under that could traumatize them if too graphic.

but that basis is on secondhand, but a quick google search tells me the same, unless research has changed.

https://clinicalcenter.nih.gov/ccc/patient_education/pepubs/childdeath.pdf

they start learning before that, but the whole decomposition thing may scar them because as it says in developmental stages, they don’t get its final and irreversible until the final stage.

all i’m saying is research the whole kids thing, and if you want to do it for young young children, tone it down.

[zooophagous]

I’m thinking for curious children first grade and up. At that time I had already made several dead animal discoveries on my own of wildlife from the nearby woods in various stages of decomp. My goal wouldn’t be to scare the shit out of them or anything but I am of the opinion that a kid can handle a cartoon zombie and should be able to handle some illustrations just fine.

But I may also be the wrong person to ask because my mom worked in the morgue and I got to see all kinds of fun things before I hit the ‘final’ stage of development so idk maybe for some kids it would scar them for life. But so can a poorly timed clown, so eh.

[sinbadism]

nobody I knew worked anywhere around death (well, my grandmother was a medical technologist but she was mainly trying to help people not die) and this absolutely would not have traumatized me. 9 years old also sounds incredibly late for a kid to understand death…. it already happens in books and movies and folktales that all kids are exposed to. My cat brought a pigeon in to our house when I was maybe 4 and I thought it was taxidermy or one of those realistic bird ornaments. If I’d understood that corpses aren’t necessarily always floppy then I might not have had my hands all over a dead bird body for like an hour before my mom noticed (I could easily be left alone for hours in the house since I would get engulfed in reading). 

There are absolutely ways to teach about that which would not be very graphic or scary for kids. Children often like gross things and when the same cat that caught that bird died a bit later I was often asking about where she was - like, she’s dead, but what about the body? I think eventually I got the (vague) answer that her body would turn into part of the soil and then she’d be in the grass and flowers. It made me feel good.

[descqnt]

i recommend checking the link. you begin to understand death at 6-9, even be curious, but you do not get the finality of it until 9. it’s not that they shouldn’t learn, it’s that it should be done in toned steps.

step 1: 1-5. https://www.babycenter.com/0_how-to-talk-to-your-preschooler-about-death_65688.bc (ex; grandpa won’t be able to visit us anymore, he stopped being able to run -to borrow a euphemism from watershipdown lmao-)

step 2: 5-9. https://www.babycenter.com/0_how-to-talk-to-your-grade-schooler-about-death_67896.bc

a good exercise: http://www.scholastic.com/browse/article.jsp?id=3758055

do you see what i mean? being too blunt can be traumatic, but being using too many euphimisms can also hurt them.

this isn’t a conservative reaction, it’s a scientific one ( i am NOT a scientist yet, however, so i am NOT an expert, these are just based on science-y things over the years (that i should clarify aren’t baby center. they just explain really well okay LOL.)

[zooophagous]

Thinkin about writing a grotesque little children’s book about decomp and what happens to a body after death about a kid’s dead pet hamster and the remarkable journey it goes on post mortem

[descqnt]

how old? kids final stage of understanding death is around nine, i believe. anything under that could traumatize them if too graphic.

but that basis is on secondhand, but a quick google search tells me the same, unless research has changed.

https://clinicalcenter.nih.gov/ccc/patient_education/pepubs/childdeath.pdf

they start learning before that, but the whole decomposition thing may scar them because as it says in developmental stages, they don’t get its final and irreversible until the final stage.

all i’m saying is research the whole kids thing, and if you want to do it for young young children, tone it down.

[zooophagous]

I’m thinking for curious children first grade and up. At that time I had already made several dead animal discoveries on my own of wildlife from the nearby woods in various stages of decomp. My goal wouldn’t be to scare the shit out of them or anything but I am of the opinion that a kid can handle a cartoon zombie and should be able to handle some illustrations just fine.

But I may also be the wrong person to ask because my mom worked in the morgue and I got to see all kinds of fun things before I hit the ‘final’ stage of development so idk maybe for some kids it would scar them for life. But so can a poorly timed clown, so eh.

[descqnt]

first grade sounds pretty good! a cartoon zombie sounds good too, but i’m just more concerned of a slideshow of various decomposition stages would be the traumatizing thing. the whole you die, your body freezes up, you become a skeleton, that’s it forever, goodbye- would be the traumatizing thing. if you do it carefully showing all of the stages could be perfect, but if you do it too callously and scientific it will absolutely traumatize a child that isn’t already interested in these things.

i’m not trying to be a debbie downer, i just want the best courses to be taken in preparation for them.

ultimately, it’s the parents decision on how ready their child is! but it doesn’t hurt to have a helpful hand to make it .. not so scary for them.

[zooophagous]

Thinkin about writing a grotesque little children’s book about decomp and what happens to a body after death about a kid’s dead pet hamster and the remarkable journey it goes on post mortem

[descqnt]

how old? kids final stage of understanding death is around nine, i believe. anything under that could traumatize them if too graphic.

but that basis is on secondhand, but a quick google search tells me the same, unless research has changed.

https://clinicalcenter.nih.gov/ccc/patient_education/pepubs/childdeath.pdf

they start learning before that, but the whole decomposition thing may scar them because as it says in developmental stages, they don’t get its final and irreversible until the final stage.

all i’m saying is research the whole kids thing, and if you want to do it for young young children, tone it down.

[anotherdoginsunglasses]

Why can people so readily accept that ace people can be gay, but not straight? Hmm makes ya think

[mukhannath]

no one denies that theyre straight (well, maybe some people do but i dont) 

but its not about that, its about the fact that all aces should be included regardless of whatever the fuck

[descqnt]

yes, there are straight asexuals and straight aromantics, but like @/discoursegrips said, it’s not about that at all.

exclusionists frequently say it’s a modifying identity, but it isn’t bc it’s a stand-alone.

example: t stands for trans. t is a stand-alone identity. you can tack on straight, pan, gay, bi, etc. the same goes for asexual, it’s a stand-alone: you tack on other identites AFTER asexual. (asexual> rom/sexual identies> so forth).

[captainbritish]

Artist friends, let me just tell you a thing. FUCK Wacom. Fuck Wacom and their planned obsolescence, fuck Wacom and their broken drivers, fuck Wacom and their over-priced tablets. For years we’ve dealt with them with no alternatives but let me tell you a thing.

I recently found out my Intuos 4′s Pen had broken and rather than spend £60-89 for a new one I decided to get a new tablet. Now, I could get the new “Intuos” (which is just the re-branded Bamboo) and i was going to until I found this beast.

This is the Huion  H610, it has almost twice the drawing space of the low-end Intuos and double the pressure levels. The one and only negative is that the pen requires a battery.

Not only that, it is larger than my Intuos 4 which I paid £150 for back in the day. Know how much this cost? £55. The same as the basic Intuos.

I am in LOVE with this thing. Let’s compare this with the lowest of the low end Wacom Intuos line.

                             Intuos          Huion

Active Area:     6 by 3.7 in    10" x 6.25"

Pressure Levels:  1024            2048

Hard Input Res:  2540 LPI      4000 LPI

Express Keys:          4                   8

Not to mention the Intuos is HIDEOUS with buttons that are in incredibly awkward places.

The fact that a £55 matches and exceeds the £150 Intuos 4 I bought years ago speaks worlds. And do you know what the very final nail in the coffin is?

THE DRIVERS. ACTUALLY. WORK.

It’s time Wacom had some real competition in the market, if you’re looking for a new tablet please consider a Huion over a Wacom. I used to be a Wacom fanboy too but now?

Here is the H610 on Amazon UK and Amazon US.

All I can find is good reviews on this thing and people doing the same thing I am doing, trying to convince people it’s worth it. So… You have the information, use it as you will.

[jurassicapark96]

I don’t have this model of huion but my tablet is a huion brand H610PRO and I love it. The buttons all make sense and the pen has a super long lifespan. It also came with extra tips for the pen and a little case thing to store them in. I highly recommend huion for a tablet.

[joyouscatus]

@keetkaaat

[descqnt]

FUCK HUION AND MONOPRICE THEIR DRIVERS AND PENS ARE SHIT AND //HUION// AND MONOPRICE IS THE ONE WITH PLANNED OBSOLESCENCE. DO YOU KNOW THE FIRST AND LAST TIME I CHATTED WITH CUSTOMER SUPPORT? 2013. NOT DUE TO ME NOT WANTING TO, OH NO, THEIR LINES ARE JUST OPEN NEVER TO GO FUCK YOURSELF, YOU SHOULDVE SEEN THIS COMING.

THEY DONT EVEN SELL REPLACEMENT PENS!!!!! I PAYED 40 DOLLARS EACH FOR 2 TABLETS, NOT INCLUDING SHIPPING, AND BOTH BROKE WITHIN A YEAR AND LET ME TELL YOU -I TREATED THOSE BITCHES LIKE FABERGE EGGS. I WAS AS CAREFUL AS A MOTHERFUCKER COULD BE. BUT NO. THEY COMMITED DEATH ANYWAYS.

[goobra]

i don’t think i’ll ever get over the fact that when inclusionists were running low on arguments, they just invented the concept of “cishet means cis heterosexual AND heteroromantic” like. that’s no where. that idea didn’t exist until like last year. and it’s 110% made up. that’s not how those words have worked ever.

[descqnt]

how long have you been on this site because i’ve been on it since 2009 and yes it did mean heteroromantic asexual

[goobra]

can you give me literally any source of that whatsoever

[descqnt]

i fucked up my wording

i fucked up real bad

but anyway i would really like to but it was mostly context based and also legit almost every blog from that period deleted or remade or archived so it’s going to have to be word of mouth or bust. i understand if y’all don’t want to believe me for not having sources lmao i just wanted to add my 2c as the grandpa of tumblr but if i do find one from 2010-13 within the next week or so i’ll come back to you 👌🏼

[thismachinekills]

the animal fucker blocked me lmao

anyway what makes being not attracted to people similar to either being attracted to similar genders or being trans. where are the ties

[descqnt]

in case no one has explained it to you, they mean robots, not animals

[thismachinekills]

mayhaps they should specify that so that idiot retards like me dont think they mean animals, huh?

[descqnt]

sorry for the late reply. i don’t know why but i don’t get notifications for this blog? they don’t even show up in stat tracker, i just have to look at notes.

anyway, it’s not anyone’s job to out right change their vocabulary, they just have to be inclined to explain to people who don’t always get things off the bat. it would be thoughtful, but it’s asking someone to go above and beyond to completely reform an inherit [vocalization and localization] of their brain. it’s a habit forming region, which means it would take a while to remember to be literal - depending on how you learn, how long it takes you to, etc.

but like i said, it’s not something that’s .. required? neither of us will die because we were wrong about someone’s intent: i am all the time bc i’m autistic too. my mom always says things metaphorically due to the era she grew up in - or, at least that’s what she says - and i always take her literally. neither of us are wrong in how we are.

it may have been shocking and upsetting to think that’s what someone meant, i get it, but that doesn’t mean it’s what they really meant, do you get what i’m saying?

[thismachinekills]

ok all of what you said implies that u think that i am insisting that they fuck animals, which is not what i am implying. what im saying is that im literally too slow to understand most implications

also lol “no one is required to change their language for you” i guess ppl can just say whatever they want then lol they dont need to not mention my triggers bc thats an inconvenience for them huh!

[descqnt]

you’re misunderstanding me

1) vocabulary is not the same thing as HOW you talk. i’m talking about your vernacular, not your entymology. what i’m saying is people don’t have to stop using metaphors or stop being literal or formal or informal or stop being them - NOT what language they use. they’re seperate concepts.

2) im slow too. which means i thought you /were/ insisting. it’s my mistake and i’m sorry.

[rosiemutual-deactivated20180308]

ace person: hey you’re being kind of aphobic rn, could you maybe not

aphobe: i’ll have you know i was born with glass bones and paper skin. every morning i break my legs, and every afternoon i break my arms. at night, i lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to slee

[kittydiscourse]

What fucks me up on here is that when someone makes a post that’s anti pedophile/rape/abuse, or wishing you a life free from harm (such as “reblog to stay happy and keep abuse out of your lives!” U know the ones I mean) etc, and then tag it like “TERFS/Truscum etc this post isn’t for you” like…I cannot stand TERFS but I would never wish abuse for them, and they should be allowed to share that they are against immoral things like abuse, rape *especially* if it has happened to them. You can’t deny someone the right to express their hatred towards abuse, to wish themselves a life free from harm and full of positivity because they don’t agree with you. Wishes for a life away from abuse and hurt should be for everyone.

[descqnt]

terfs and radfems are abusive by nature therefor they’re abusers, therefor your tag “ #ofc not abusers tho” should also apply to them

[tsu-anti]

Exclusionists: accuse ace people of stealing terminology from autistic people with literally no basis

Also Exclusionists: constantly participate in cringe culture which is extremely antiautism and don’t see an ounce of irony in that

[4785725495068359685546043673475]

Anyway if you are a mlm and you identify as achillean I don’t trust you

[descqnt]

what

[frenchfrycourse-archive]

anyways cis exclusionists are the devil and that’s the tea on that

[mewcourse]

i havent seen anyone else say this yet so

no offense but can we not group demigirl and demiboy in with mogai? they are not harmful or unnecessary terms, they are legitimate nonbinary identities and to call them mogai bullshit and group them in with shit like “bordergender” is really kinda transphobic.

[emotional-karuma]

anyway litterally all nonbinary identites are mogai terms

[loumandliker]

> the implication that bordergender, a gender for nonbinary borderline people whose gender shifts because of unstable identity due to Having Bpd, a disorder characterized by Identity Issues, is transphobic

[queerautism]

Can we instead stop calling terms that aren’t helpful for you personally ‘unnecessary’ and let neurodivergent people use language that reflects their experiences without saying it’s harmful or transphobic thanks

[mewcourse]

yall on this post are fucking embarrassing u know that right

[queerautism]

Can you explain what exactly is embarrassing about saying that you should respect identity labels even if they aren’t useful to you personally, and respect how neurodivergent people decide to talk about their experiences affecting their orientation?

[mewcourse]

turning the suffering of those with bpd into a KUWEER LGBTQIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPNABCDEFGHIJ++++++++ IDENTITY!!!! is actually horrifically ableist lmao and it encourages the dumb idea of “ohhhh this is my GENDER IDENTITY so i dont need to recognise my symptoms or work on them” its just rly harmful and anti recovery and i cant even articulate myself because i am in fucking awe at what youre saying

[queerautism]

People with BPD talking about how their neurodivergency affects their identity, especially since it’s a personality disorder which has identity issues as a big part of it, is not fucking ableist.

Me wanting to talk about how being autistic is a part of my nonbinary identity is also not ableist. Because it’s the same in both these cases - Recognising how your own brain works and how that affects your understanding of gender, and using that to find or create a term that you’re more comfortable with, is not harmful or ‘anti recovery’.

The way you’re talking about queer neurodivergent people is fucking gross honestly.

[discoursecourse]

tbh? i see it as anti recovery. its good to acknowledge your mental illness amd stuff, but you shouldn’t make it a permanent part of who you are. that seems to me like you don’t really want to change it, get better. and please dont call all lgbt people q*eer!! just bc you’ve decided to reclaim doesnt mean everyone else has. its a slur and thats it.

[queerautism]

Again. In context I am clearly using it for myself and my community of other neurodivergent people who identify as queer and feel their queerness is linked to their neurodiversity. Not all LGBTQIA+ people.

There is no ‘recovery’ from autism, or from many other neurotypes and disorders. They are a permanent part of who we are, they are a part of our identities and they will always be. Recognising this and understanding how it affects the way we understand the social construct of gender, finding a way to be more comfortable with it, instead of being filled with confusion, self hate and internalised ableism, is what ‘getting better’ is for a lot of us.

[mewcourse]

we’re not talking about autism lol we’re talking about bpd what are u going on about

[graysoncourse]

hey! autistic trans guy here. while my autism definitely has some affect on my gender, i dont think its exactly healthy to form an identity around a disability/mental illness like that. it does foster an environment of anti-recovery, and thats harmful. and note, recovery doesnt meant to “cure” or “get rid of”. i know theres no “recovery from autism”, trust me. but theres learning to manage what it gives u, and thats what recovery means. i have lots of trouble with noises people make- i get overloaded easily in the car, its all too loud and too much, especially with two younger siblings- but im working on managing it so i dont have breakdowns through the use of music and stims. thats my recovery process, knowing how to personally deal with my issues so i can better myself. when forming an identity around neurodivergency, it creates a bubble of “i dont have to change, because this is just who i am”, and thats not healthy.

anyways, throwing ourselves back to the original argument, nb identities arent automatically mogai! stop categorizing people with labels like that! and revolving an identity around a neurodivergency and then lumping urself with nb identities is bad and reinforces the idea that transness is a mental illness! thanks for coming to my ted talk!

(ps this is just my two cents and im probably not gonna spend my energy actively engaging in this debate, i just felt like i should say something because i agree with @metalcourse)

[ninecourse]

hey! transguy with bpd here! saying that bpd is a gender/strongly influences gender is really fucking ableist and im honestly offended.

[descqnt]

hey! trans guy with bpd here! saying that bpd can’t strongly influence your gender is really fucking ableist and i’m honestly offended.