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@devieklutz
Today on "I Love This Thing So Fricking Much," we spoke with Hanna, a black belt who loves Choy Lay Fut style kung fu! Tune in at the link above or wherever you listen to podcasts to hear the full story.
If YOU have something you love so fricking much you want to tell me all about it, use the guest submission form linked in the bio!
(via liondancefan)
the nearest depiction of an animal or other sentient fantasy creature to you at this moment comes to life right where it is (i.e. cat photograph, shark plushie, dragon painting, etc)
what happens to you
i am so dead
i need to go to the hospital
maybe a few things to be looked at but i’m fine in the end
i’m totally fine
i’m totally fine and i’m happy
my situation is really really really specific lemme tell you about it
n/a
assume it doesn’t know you (unless it’s actually a specific animal you’ve met) and that it’s normal for its species and would do whatever was natural for it. including being too giant for and destroying the room it’s in. as well as dying immediately if its environment can’t support its life
also a poem from the new, unreleased collection. very possibly my own all-time favourite.
Weevil
small but mighty...
Awww!!!
... but then I think about it & it probably takes a LOT of skill for dude-man to do that & make it look legit.
Props, my guy, for not only bringing kiddo such joy WHILE managing to look super cool at the same time.
👍 Very impressive!
to do it, to make it look legit, and to not hurt the kid. He's flipping hos WHOLE BODY around that child and the child is never nudged by any force stronger than a strong breeze. Even when the kid is lifted up in the air, that kid is supported and moved SO gently and SO safely. That guy is totally in control even when he's upside down and backwards!
Joy and whimsy detected! This post is joyful and whimsical!
One of the toddlers at the martial arts school today heard that there is a competition in a different country/continent (which several of their instructors will be competing in) and when the class was asked if they knew where that country was raised their hand and said 'I don't know where that is but I'M GOING TO SPACE!'
Doctor: What do you see in this X-ray?
Students: *collective gasp*
Doctor: Please don’t do that in front of patients.
Some alternative statements you could consider when your initial reaction is just ‘!’:
I’m glad we took that X-ray
Well this is almost certainly diagnostic
When one of my classmates broke my leg in 2nd Grade, there was an entire fiasco and I nearly died but I do remember the guy from radiology storming out to the little curtain area I was in and SLAPPING the X-ray up on the back light and the doctor actually shouting "JE-YAY-SUS! No wonder the kid doesn't have any damn blood!"
i have corneal dystrophy so my corneas will just kind of. tear. for no reason. quite frequently. cause of death: blinked too hard.
so one time i was in the eye hospital (id been there the day before and a junior doc dismissed me entirely as nothing being wrong, sent me off with no treatment, and my optician was Not Having It)
selfsame junior doc eye rolled and, when it was clear i wouldn't be leaving again, begrudgingly called in the consultant who took one glance at one eye, said "oh my god" and sent for a second consultant
who took one look and said "'ive never seen anything like it" and sent for a third
who took a quick look and said "wow. jesus. what a mess" and sent for the fourth etc
(junior doc getting progressively more embarrassed the whole time)
anyway both of my corneas have torn so many times it's apparently just a mess of scar tissue. but if you were wondering what's worse than one doctor exclaiming in surprise with 0 info, its having the entire department do it in succession
@crimeronan
Many years ago, my beloved was having an echocardiogram, when a World-Renowed Heart Surgeon walked by and said "Wow! Will you listen to that!", and then a series of not-so-renowed heart surgeons, non-surgeon cardiologists, wannabee heart surgeons, and med students were called into the room to take a listen.
(It was less a heart *beat* and more like the kerfwollop of a rabbit bouncing around. The technical term is "audible squish")
(It's all good now.)
So one time I almost died from “mystery sepsis” in my intestines and the everything was so weird that not only did random doctors from all over the hospital come to take a look but a doctor who was visiting from out of state showed up to go ‘wooow wtf’
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@dubiousculturalartifact
i think ultimately you do really have to kill that part of your brain that vividly imagines how you would redo parts of your life.
Lords and Ladies - Terry Pratchett
sometimes people writing about fantasy gay sex are right, actually. just found out that sword oil CAN be used as lube. listening and learning.
As someone who write fantasy, including the gay one, I’d very much love to know how you found that out.
Well... I'm the kind of person who will start reading a fic on AO3, say "that can't be right," and go down an hour-long Wikipedia hole about historical lubes.
Most natural plant-based oils may be used as lube, though they're messier and not as good as modern water-based or silicone-based lube. Just remember that oils aren't good with latex — but your knights probably aren't using latex condoms, anyway.
Historically, a common sword oil was linseed oil, which is natural, plant-based, and food-safe. So, again, a fine choice.
Other historical options include other plant- or vegetable-based oils, which are probably fine. Some also used animal oils though, which is not fine and can lead to infections. Avoid that shit 🙅
For traditional Japanese swords, choji oil was used, which is made from cloves. High concentrations of clove oil can be toxic, so you HAVE to dilute that shit — 1% concentration or less. Once diluted though, clove oil is considered safe and can be used to treat and soothe anal injuries. It also has a numbing effect that could help with rough anal sex, but your ass would hurt like a bitch after the effect wears off.
A lot of modern sword oil is just mineral oil, which, while not plant-based, is food-safe and is actually recommended for use in enemas because it's safe and long-lasting. So while it's not great for vaginal use because it can irritate the skin there, it can be pretty well-suited for anal use.
There are a few modern sword oils made from machine oil and motor oil. Those should not go in any orifice whatsoever 🙅 Always check the label before using improvised lube.
Anyway, I hope that helps! I hope your knights enjoy their fantasy love-making ❤️
And funnily enough, I find this post useful for the sword oils because I am not fond of the mineral oil I have been using on my sword so now I’m going to try some plant based food safe oil options!
A meeting of dragons.
Love a good lion dance and love a baby lion and the cute interactions.
That said, as someone who is part of a lion dance team who goes out and performs, please be gentle about interacting with the lions! Some of the costumes can be fragile so please dont pull at fur or the horns or ears etc. Also please do not pat the lion's butt. That is an actual person's butt.
You can find this and other relevant writing for $1/mo (or more) here.
living is a jewish value. partake in it. <3
i know. i get it. it’s so hard right now. but you’re doing it. and i love you for that.
do it kvetching the whole time. do it out of sheer spite. fuck, complaining is very nearly a jewish value of its own…and so is survival. whatever you need to to get through this, do it.
(and also find the joy! i promise it is there for you. if nothing else in your life, i will be there for you and i am cheering for y’all so hard right now.)
because life, your life, is the most important thing. and i do mean that for every single one of you.
reblogging this again in case any of yall need a reminder. <3
i love you all so so much please live to the best of your ability i’ll be proud no matter what.
l’chaim !!!!!!
I’m putting this in the actual post not in the tags because maybe someone will see it who needs to. I had a professor in undergrad who told me something as an offhand comment that has stuck with me deeply. I doubt he had any idea that this phrase would save my life by stopping me from doing something stupid on more than one occasion. He told me:
“Don’t give Hitler any posthumous victories.”
Every living Jew is a success story. Stay alive out of spite if you need to, but stay alive.
I've been training in a face cover ever since they let us back indoors yet I remain curiously unfainted.
I've been (assistant) teaching and training at kung fu for 5-6 hours/day 5-6 days per week while masked for a While now. I participate in tournaments with my mask on. If we are indoors my mask is on. I am progressing at a speed significantly faster than average. I have had no problems with breathing because of my mask, I have gotten sick significantly LESS often since I started masking.
