Untitled

You read that right

[dilf-bussy]

how much for that url

The head of two billionaires and three dollars

[dilf-bussy]

Due to inflation, I’m going to have to increase the price to three billionaires and $3.75

[beebfreeb]

Please keep work place safety in mind at all times

[beebfreeb]

Did I mess up somehow? Is it not obvious enough?

[homunculus-argument]

A sick wizard castle with a nondescript van painted on the side. A gothy pin-up girl with the portrait of a random trucker tattooed on her thigh. A bathroom-themed beach vacation. A beautiful brightly coloured cupcake that tastes like soap.

[tyrian-red]

most men have two fuckable holes. some men have three. but, against all odds, julius caesar (100 BC to 44 BC) managed to amass an astounding 25 holes by the time of his death

[eggblackoutpoetry]

“Egg”

[eclecticopposition]

what is THE worst thing you've ever drank. all liquids acceptable. please tell me what it was, bonus points for why

[carby]

Hey whoa hi. Hello. I am looking directly into your ear canal. What do you mean you drank a tube of virus concentrate.

[whyamiherewhosummonedme]

So, I was working in a lab, right? My job in the lab was preparing a pure, concentrated enough sample of virus. This is tricky since, y'know, viruses require hosts to replicate, but you then need to get the host cells (and the pieces of the host cells that died!) out of the sample while still keeping the viruses. Once I'd finished and the samples had been sent to the database for analysis as well as a second one sent to be frozen for future reference, there was still some left over that needed to be disposed of.

I, knowing that this was a once in a lifetime opportunity, waited carefully for the lab director to be deep in conversation with someone else on the other side of the laboratory. And then I took my chance.

Test tubes, as it turns out, are really bad as shot glasses. Their shape turns any liquid inside into a stream, so you really can't knock it back quickly - it takes a couple seconds. Additionally, the best way I can describe the taste of virus concentrate was "sterile rot". A very unique kind of bad! Made worse by the test tube's inefficiency as a shot glass.

(by the way we were studying bacteriophages, not animal viruses. these viruses are too specialized on attacking prokaryotes to even recognize our cells as targets at all, according to studies.)

(but also like. if the viruses managed to successfully switch hosts and killed me with a violent infection, itd still be worth it.)

(for science.)

[violetthunderstorm]

You have a fitting blog title

[nico-the-overlord]

this post is getting 50k easy

[marlinspirkhall]

[unyieldingsilence]

‎

[omegaverse]

i really want to make music but i can’t sing :( or rap

[jiluan-deactivated20171207]

I’m beatboxing right now drop a freestyle

[omegaverse]

im on the cell phone  holdin my dick bone im just tryna phone rome caesar gonna get some

they call me lil man lil dick itty bitty meat stick my vienna sausage dumb soft  i cant even nut quick

these rhymes go hard though like hot piss, cold snow you aint even know my dick cant get hard tho

you viagra ass hoes poppin pills to get by while  im slapping at my dick and im wondering why  my dick dont work my dick dont work  my dick dont work my dick dont work my dick dont work my dick dont work my dick dont work my dick dont work my dick dont work my dick dont work my dick dont work

[ruemilley]

for make a terrible comic day

[skrytch]

@demilypyro

[lmaonade]

devil may happy :)

[kluskikosklo]

Wouldn’t it’ve made more sense to to say devil may smile?

[lmaonade]

critique my post ever again and devil may angry

[stainlessteelwaterbottle]

youre telling me a ham fisted this metaphor??

[victoriankeysmash]

[shadowthehedgehogmovie]

[thequeeninyellowlace]

[anxiety-elemental-kay]

[rockergiirl]

damn your pussy fat and long and hard and outside

[jesterattack]

I habe some bad news

[rockergiirl]

BOTH TOWERS?

[lemon-labia]

i bet being treated properly by your parents your whole life feels sooooo good

[tatzelwurming]

most weapons forged against me will in fact prosper but please don’t do any of that and instead be nice to me

[tatzelwurming]

please stop forging weapons

[cipheramnesia]

Every day I'm thankful that no one is out there forging weapons against me.

[dilf-bussy]

Thats what those forging weapons against you want you to think

[mizuthe-dog]

There’s a gimmick blog right behind me with a gun to my head

[typo-spotter]

This post does not contain typos!

Of course, it is still incorrect, so how about I fix the error!

"There's a gimmick blog right behind me…"

Should be:

"There are gimmick blogs right behind me…"

[mizuthe-dog]

[unyieldingsilence]

‎

[pronoun-st3aler]

There’s a gimmick blog right behind OP with a gun to OP's head

[my-dailydreams]

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

[zombiepatch]

just thinking about ddlc again and, like… the moment where monika says “or should i call you [windows user name]?” if the name you enter in-game doesn’t match? that hit different as a trans person who hadn’t yet updated their windows name at the time of playing.

sure monika knowing your “real name” is already scary, but being fucking DEADNAMED by monika is both so much worse and REALLY funny in a fucked up way. the programming accidentally made this beloved horror game character be transphobic @ me. truly a gaslight gatekeep girlboss moment <3

[zombiepatch]

pov, monika is about to break the 4th wall in the form of accidental transphobia

[storm-of-feathers]

EVERYONE STOP TELLING ME HOW OLD YOU WERE IN 2008 I DONT WANNA HEAR THAT SHIT

[storm-of-feathers]

SOME OF YOU SHOULD BE AT THE OPRHANGE

[storm-of-feathers]

preschool. I meant preschool.

[filmphotofranz]