Dirty Grand Theft Auto Confessions

Hi folks! Welcome to Dirty Grand Theft Auto Confessions; your one stop shop for everything GTA. If you have a confession for: - Grand Theft Auto - Grand Theft Auto: London 1969 - Grand Theft Auto II - Grand Theft Auto III - Grand Theft Auto: Vice City - Grand Theft Auto Advance - Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas - Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City Stories - Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories - Grand Theft Auto IV - Grand Theft Auto: The Lost and Damned - Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars - Grand Theft Auto: The Ballad of Gay Tony - Grand Theft Auto V Then feel free to submit your confession or any artwork you want put up. We're non-judgemental folk but please, no spamming! Just a warning though; I won't post anything that may require a trigger warning (ie no rapey, non-con stuff please), nothing containing hatespeech of any variety or any spammy posts. Let's try to keep this a fun, friendly and sexy place.

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

Is this account this active?

Yes, life's just caught up with me a bit. Going through my messages and doing up new confessions as we speak though.

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

Honestly? I think Michael would go apeshit before being given some perspective by Amanda and Trevor after punching the living shit out of some poor sucker in LS who looked at him the wrong way The only difference would really be the way in which Trevor and Amanda would give him perspective- Trevor would approach it in a way of ‘Mikey, look at yourself; Amanda was a lady of the pole before you knocked her up with Tracey’ whereas Amanda would approach it in a way of ‘She’s a far better girl than we were at her age Michael- you were running drugs with Trevor, I was a working girl; she’s gonna be ok.’ I think he’d reach a point of understanding with her (not without going the whole ‘But what about boys your own age?’ first) and realise that his first responsibility was as a father and a grandparent. Doesn’t mean that family dinners with Dave at the table wouldn’t be icy, nor that he wouldn’t whisper to Trevor “The first sign that he fucking hurt her or that baby...we kill that FIB fuck.” :P I think when the child was born though, he’d be a pretty active grandfather to try to atone for how much he wasn’t there for his own children while they were growing up. Walks along Vespucci Beach with an icecream in hand, being in the front row at their first soccer game (and of course punching out the referee), the works. You’re not strange at all love, I like coming up with these!

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

Not gonna lie, that is a really out-there pairing Pyro. I wonder how they’d meet? It’d have to be through Uncle T of course, maybe while he’s trying to discourage her (or encourage, whatever floats your boat) from getting a job at the Vanilla Unicorn when Chef bursts in with the latest catastrophy that’s happened in the meth lab. Still, it’d be hilarous to see Michael’s reaction to his daughter dating a meth dealer, considering his reaction to her being in the presence of porn producers that’d rented their house the previous summer. Eh, I’m down :D

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

Real Talk- Being An Adult, Making Adult Noises

Hey guys, I’m so sorry I did it again- I left for ages without a word for a few reasons: - I finally managed to get shifts at my job, so I went from having an arctic hinterland of a work schedule to getting to the stage of ‘Why do I even bother coming home when I spend EVERY FUCKING DAY HERE?’ - I graduated from University with a Bachelor’s Degree in Visual Communication Design, so patting myself on the back for that one but of course, comes with a whole fleet of issues unto itself (tens of thousands of dollars debt with only the paddle of adulthood to get myself out, whattup?) - I’m juggling a design gig where I’ve only just recently started speaking to the guy who was meant to be giving me my briefs, because he doesn’t know how design works and was essentially trying to both micromanage me and take over my job. Thankfully, he’s finally agreed to let me do what I do best and leave the work in my hands. - I’m also the new admin of a rather large Facebook page that I probably won’t link here as I like keeping my online lives fragmented and private. Anyway, hopefully I’ll be able to get my shit together with updating this, really sorry about being a terrible admin again. 

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

not a confession! just wanted to say, i think she'd experiment with shaving then when the fans of her early 1984 work said "No! Your bush made you.. YOU!" she'da kept it, and to your second question i love dyed hair with different colored pubes, but i want to say she's a natural redhead, but something tells me she's not and her pubes, pit, and anus hair are a chestnut brown (don't ask why chestnut it just felt right to say)

For those unfamiliar for what this is in reference to, here’s the link: http://dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions.tumblr.com/post/110718042390/haha-wow-ok-fair-enough-i-have-to-say-anon

I get the feeling that she’s a natural redhead too, but as for the chestnut brown, I just can’t picture it. I think that a natural red head of hair all over would’ve been what set her apart from the bleached Vice City blondes.As for her fans, I’d imagine that they’d send her fan mail in spades but I’m interested to see how he evolved with the development of the internet and the impact that has on porn. Would she be doing cam videos like some porn stars or would her work be behind a paywall? Would she be directing even? I’d really like to see her in later installments of GTA so these questions could be answered.

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

Lamar and Ron, hmmm.....definitely an out-of-left-field pairing, that’s for sure. Nonetheless, I’m curious as to how you’d write them- what would attract Lamar to Ron and Ron to Lamar, seeing as they’re both so different? I’ll be keeping my eyes peeled, that’s for sure.

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

All I can really say to this is God Bless First Person, haha- it seems that Rockstar had a browse on Tumblr before setting to work and decided to give the fans what they want.  The only thing I will say is that it might be a god idea to actually buy a vibrator if you can- most sites only need a Paypal account or credit card number so it’s super easy to get one instead of using your controller.

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

That’s very interesting Anon- admittedly, I haven’t met anyone who gets turned on my massive, intricate digital worlds but I can understand that San Andreas circa 2013 is indeed very beautiful; I think adding animals really worked in Rockstar’s favour as it really is the little details that make a world like this come to life. Also, Hitachi wands are bae <3

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

YES! All of my yes! I don’t know why he didn’t receive concept art as he’s not exactly a minor character but I’m guessing it’s the same as always- deadlines, deadlines, deadlines. I think his concept art would be of him either sharing a cuddle with Mr Raspberry Jam, cleaning Debra’s portrait or just trying to clean up after Wade’s mishap at the docks. One can dream.

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

That would be awesome! I can see from Michael’s accent that he sounds like he’d be from Liberty City, so it’d fit right in with Tommy as that used to be his old stomping ground. OR it could be set in Vice during Tommy’s rise to power when Michael would’ve been roaming around with Trevor pulling various jobs. Either way, I can see a fantastic rivalry evolving from it between two great men, possibly forcing Michael back to North Yankton. I wonder how they’d become friends though? Maybe they could be targeted by the same man (possibly the girl’s father/local rival druglord) or develop a friendship out of similar interests- perhaps Tommy’s a movie guy or they could share previous war stories, finding out that they’re not so different after all. It’s a great idea and needs to be written down- extra points if Trevor gets super jealous of Tommy and Michael’s friendship or they reunite years later after the Union Depository job.

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

Real Talk: We’re Gonna Need Chips and Dip and Prostitutes

Hey guys, I am FINALLY back after my last semester of uni and have two exams left to go before I actually graduate, which means I can finally get back to doing these here confessions! I hadn’t forgot you guys, I’ve just been busy with that, picking up more work, trying to put together a portfolio to apply for another job and becoming the admin of a rather busy FB page (which before you ask, I won’t be sharing on here as I like to keep my social media compartmentalised). In a nutshell, shit’s been cray. However, I’m back to tend to all of your confessions so keep sending them in!

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

Real Talk: Still Alive

Hey there folks, I know I haven’t made an update in fucking ages and I’m sorry for that- I’ve basically been head-down arse-up at uni and trying to get an actual adult job by working my guts out on a portfolio that will hopefully make that happen. I’ve also been working on trying to get a games review blog up and running (which as you can imagine involves playing a shitload of games so that I actually have something to write about :P) but rest assured I have not forgotten about this blog or the confessions still waiting in my inbox- it’s just gonna take a bit of time, that’s all. I hope you’re all well and excited for the PC release of GTAV in 10 days time; the 60fps trailer has just been released and it looks fucking incredible: http://www.rockstargames.com/newswire/article/52411/watch-the-gtav-60-frames-per-second-pc-trailer

[bifurb]

[hiyokosai0nji-deactivated201401]

ok we had to watch this in chem class

that sexual tension

[fhauvhebsucbejdiak]

that spill was not an accident

[tyleroakley]

So does your lab partner get to watch for the whole 15 minutes?

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

Is it just me or does this remind anyone else of Michael and Trevor if they were in highschool? Either way, I'm inspired as fuck.

[cutebatarians]

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

One of Trev's finer moments.

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

I know that feel Spiffs- I'm partly hispanic myself and Luis reminds me of quite a few of my relatives, it's really funny but at the same time really heartwarming too. A lot of the time I try to not let a lack of representation bother me as I believe that you can feel an emotional connection to characters that aren't necessarily like you however when I do see someone that I can relate to on a personal level in one of my games, I can't help but smile. I really like how Luis is intelligent but not just on a street-smart level; he is Tony's right hand man for a reason and he's definitely earned his stripes. I could see him owning his own chain of nightclubs or opening up a casino in Las Venturas- maybe we might see more of him. Hopefully we will keep receiving more and more varied protagonists as the series goes on; I'd really love to see a female protagonist down the line and if she's a mixed bag like I am (Spanish, Irish, Swedish, Italian, English...my great-greats essentially humped their way across Europe :P), I think I'll just start flailing with happiness.

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

You really shouldn't love- I mean, far be it from me to tell you how to feel of course, but Trevor does have a lot of great qualities about him and his backstory and relationships with others did hit a few raw spots in me as well. I think in part, it's because he wears his scarred little heart on his sleeve when many of us try to move on as far as we can go from things that have hurt us in order to not feel that way again. He's a person who's clearly been moulded by how much he has been hurt and he has a dichotomy of being horrible as a result of the abuse he has suffered and being a great, kindhearted person in spite of it. He's a walking contradiction that you just want to give a fucking hug. I could write a dissertation about Trevor Philips but the bottom line is I get it. I relate to Trevor in many respects and I think that he's such an important character within the series because he's not stuck in this "Ho hum, better go kill this guy now" kind of characterisation that plagued GTA protagonists for a long time (not that I love any of the protags before Trevor less, I'm just saying that not many went into committing their crimes with quite the same enthusiasm as what Trevor did) but rather he is an extreme in many different senses- in his criminality, his emotions, his reactions, his personality. He doesn't try to mask the fact that he's broken, he duct-tapes himself back together and goes back in guns blazing because that's all he knows how to to do and I admire him for that. I'm glad he's helping you too :)

[dirtygrandtheftautoconfessions]

Yes! It would've been great to have seen more of her because she's such an interesting character- on face value she embodies that whole type-A, have-it-all-yet-wanting-more personality that seems to be as a direct result of living in such an opulent place like Vinewood but I'd love to see why she is like she is; maybe she's a person who exercises her guts out because that's the one part of her life she feels like she can control, maybe she's a person who secretly wants a bit of the rough life as an escape from her tightly-wound existence (cue Trevor Philips), we just don't know. Hopefully she pops up later on in the series. It'd be cool if she knew Amanda, regardless of whether they were friends, frenemies or enemies, although I picture them being more like fremenies due to Mary-Ann only meeting Michael for the first time in-game and not knowing who he is. Maybe they're rivals in Pilates or spin class?