i would KILL for anything francis. i write for him in my head but there is like two francis fics on here
crush (francis wilkerson x fem reader)
summary: you and francis go to a party when he comes back from marlin academy for a visit. you accidentally get WAY too drunk and say some things you've been holding back.
warnings: cursing, underage drinking described, themes of violence, implication of unwanted advances, and reader pukes :(
A/N: this is my first work on tumblr ever!! i'm doing this on desktop so I hope the formatting is okay :) feedback is welcomed, and soon i'll establish what i'm comfortable writing cuz i'm not sure yet!
You and Francis had been friends since you two were in junior high, meeting each other in your 7th grade math class. You two had bonded over resentments you both held for your families and academics, and the rest is seemingly history. You were always around over the years, hanging around the Wilkerson house and chilling with Francis (getting into mischeif), or rough housing with Malcolm and Reese. If you were feeling up to it, you would occasionally help Dewey with his homework.
While being one of the closest friends to Francis, you had developed some sort of feelings along the way. You really tried to ignore and suppress them, since it was very clear that he would never feel the same way about you. He had always gone after every girl but you. It made you quietly frustrated that he couldn’t see what was right in front of him. Despite yourself, you always just put on your best front and acted like you felt completely platonically about the pretty blonde boy. You just wanted him to be happy, and frankly, you weren’t eager to be rejected and completely demolish years of friendship.
But now, Francis was away at military school, and would only come back to visit every once in a while. You were always excited for the next time he would come back home, so you two could hang out, just like old times.
One afternoon after school, you were in the kitchen grabbing a Caprisun when you heard the phone ring through the living room. You pace to the side table by the couch, picking up the phone.
You feel excitement and joy bubble up inside your body at just the sound of his voice and plop yourself down onto the couch.
“Francis, hi!” you respond giddily.
You both start going back and forth, talking about your respective lives, and Francis tells you the last insane situation he got himself into with Commandant Spangler that makes you laugh so hard you felt like oxygen wasn’t reaching your lungs.
Then there’s a pause. You can hear him clear his throat and start speaking.
“So uh.. I’m actually gonna be coming home in a couple days, if you wanna, you know.. hang out?”
A smile immediately took over your face as you sat up from laying down.
“Really? Oh my god! Yeah of course I wanna hang out with you!” you excitedly exclaim.
You could hear his amused chuckle on the other line, you can imagine he’s probably leaning against the wall next to the phone with that stupid smirk on his face that always made you feel flushed.
“Well, I’ll call you and let you know when I’m home, you can choose what we do, alright?”
You hold in a happy squeal, trying to act as calm as you can as you respond.
“Okay yeah sounds good.” You quickly blurt out, trying to be as nonchalant as possible.
There’s a moment of silence before Francis’s voice breaks through the call again.
“Ok, I gotta go but I'll see you soon, okay?”
You smile to yourself as you fidget with a thread on your sock.
“Yeah. See ya soon, bye!”
You hear the phone click as he hangs up, sighing to yourself as you put the phone back into the receiver.
You were sitting on your couch, flipping through channels with boredom when the phone rings next to you, causing your body to jump in its place. You immediately realize it’s probably Francis and instantly pick up the phone with probably a bit too much vigor.
“How’d you know it was me?”
You simultaneously mentally curse yourself and heave a sigh of relief that it actually was him.
“Just a lucky guess.. So are you home?” you try to swiftly change the subject.
“Yeah I just got here a couple hours ago. Trying to leave though.” he grumpily mumbles the last remark, making you stifle a laugh.
An idea suddenly surfaces in your brain and leaves your mouth.
“Well, there’s a spring break party happening later around 9, if you wanna go to that… with me?”
You facepalmed at the way you spoke. Why did you have to be so awkward? It was just Francis.
That was sorta the issue, wasn’t it?
The guy who you had been friends with since you were like 12 was the most comfortable you had ever been around anybody, yet these stupid, stupid feelings made you feel so clumsy over your own words and self conscious about how you acted around him. You prayed he wouldn’t notice when you both arrived at the party. But you had that pretty much covered since you were planning to get stinking drunk to cope.
You could hear his thoughtful hum that sounded like safety to you on the other end of the line and wanted to crawl in a hole forever. How are you gonna handle being around him? It feels like it's been forever since you saw him last, you have no idea how you’re gonna be able to survive this night without doing anything to humiliate yourself in front of him.
“That sounds like fun, just let me wait till everyone’s in bed.” he quietly speaks into the phone, probably wanting to avoid any of his brothers or his parents from hearing him.
“I'll take my mom’s car since my parents are gone for the night. I’ll.. make sure to park it a couple houses down.”
“Yeah that sounds good, just get here around 8:30, ok?”
You feel nervousness swirl around your gut at his confirmation.
“Got it.. Well.. I’ll see you then..”
“See ya, bye Y/N” he quickly whispers and you hear him hang up.
You sigh to yourself as you put the phone back down into the receiver, and suddenly worrisome thoughts swarm through your head like flies.
You sat in the driver seat of your mom’s Toyota Camry, drumming your fingers anxiously against the wheel as you waited for Francis to walk down the street and find you. You had spent at least an hour and half overthinking and trying on several outfits, finally landing on a cute long sleeve and jeans.
Your eyes were anticipatingly scanning outside the window shield when you saw the troublesome boy walking casually to your passenger door, pulling on the handle to open the door. He knocks on the window with his knuckle, signaling for you to unlock the door. You lean over and unlock it, letting him open it and sit down. He sighs as he firmly shuts the door. He finally looks over at you and you feel like you could throw up. He looks so pretty. He was wearing that green sweater you secretly loved on him.
“Hi..” you finally spoke, embarrassment creeping in from how meek you sounded.
He looked you over with an expression you couldn’t seem to read. He seemed amused at your mannerisms with a hint of something you couldn’t pick up on.
“Hey, it's.. good to finally see you. Let's get going to this party, huh? It's gonna be fun.”
He said that in a way that made you feel reassured that he didn’t find you strange and offputting. You smiled at him softly and nodded, turning your key to turn the car on, making a turn in the middle of the street to drive in the opposite direction he had walked from.
The radio played softly in the background as you wracked your brain on what to say to him. You don’t let yourself think about how much you truly missed him. Some nights, you had imagined scenarios of you and him being together again and you saying something witty or clever to make him swoon and realize how much he actually liked you. You knew it was crazy. But you couldn’t help it. So finally being beside him in reality is making your stomach do flips.
Francis clears his throat, which makes you jump slightly.
“So, how’ve you been?” he asks.
“I’ve been okay. School is the same as always. I still hang around your house and give Malcolm and Reese shit for no reason. You better thank me for taking your role while you’re gone.” you tease.
He chuckles heartedly, looking over at you and catching your eye for a second.
“I do thank you, really.”
You giggle, feeling the ice and tension from your bones release. You and him were still okay. Things were still how they were before. Hopefully you don’t ruin that.
“How’s military school been? Is it really as bad as you say it is?” you smirked as you continued driving ahead.
He groans and runs his hand through his golden blonde hair.
“Yes! Spangler makes it hell there. You would understand if you were actually there, Y/N. The shit he makes us do is ridiculous!”
You laugh at his exasperation and punch his shoulder playfully.
“I believe you, Francis. But you know it's your fault you’re even there in the first place, right?” you tease, just to rag on him.
He shakes his head in offense.
“Don’t you even dare. You have no idea what it's like to live with my mother.”
You chuckle and sigh at his remark. In your opinion, Lois had and has every right to yell at these boys, they’re truly ruthless. You love the Wilkerson boys but they stress that woman out so much, you could see it on her face. She maybe was more ruthless to Francis, but you digress.
You find yourself parking in an empty field a ways away from the house where the party was being held.
You turn off the car, heaving a deep breath out and looking over to the boy next to you.
“Okay, let’s get going. Let’s make this night an unforgettable one, since I have no idea when you’re gonna be in the neighborhood next.”
You open your car door and step out into the night air.
You said this in a humorous tone, but internally, you harbored some resentment and upset that he was away at Marlin Academy. You two were supposed to get through high school together, no matter how much it sucked. You had to do it all alone. That made you incredibly heartbroken daily. You had your own little group of girlfriends, but you always longed to have the rebellious blonde around you.
Francis smiles at you and nods, opening his door to exit the car, following suit.
When you and Francis had entered the house party, you immediately darted for the box cooler by the kitchen that was full of beer, wanting to get a buzz going.
You checked behind you as you grabbed two beers, seeing that Francis was catching up with his old friends. You smiled to yourself as you could see him animatedly talking to Richie about something you couldn’t make out over all the noise.
You began walking through a sea of people, making it over to him and tapping his shoulder, offering him a can of beer.
He snaps out of his conversation, looking at you with a grin as he takes the can, cracking it open and chugging half of it off the rip, which makes you giggle and roll your eyes at him.
You also drank your beer, internally hoping you get drunk enough to not feel so shaky and nervous around him. You just wanted your brain to shut up and stop going a hundred miles a minute.
After a while, you lose Francis in the crowd. Which, you didn’t really mind as you found more alcohol and some girlfriends that you didn’t even know were here until you accidentally bumped into one of them.
You found yourself chatting it up with your friend Ally from Biology class in the back yard, when this guy behind you aggressively turns you towards him. He was stocky, maybe around 6’0. He had dark brown hair that was spiked with gel. He immediately made you feel unsafe, your heart pounding against your sternum.
“You here alone tonight?” he asked through slurred words. He was clearly hammered.
“No, I'm with my friends.”
You pulled your friend by the wrist, trying to show him that you were in fact, not alone.
The world seemed like it was spinning as you faced this guy. You had gotten incredibly drunk off of those shots you and your friends had taken together in the kitchen.
The presence of you two only seemed to spur him on further, him asking you two if you would meet him up in one of the bedrooms in this random person’s house.
You began yelling at him for saying such a disgusting thing. You got up in his face, pointing your finger at him. You couldn’t stop yourself from shouting insults in his face.
He grabs you by the shoulders and lifts you up with vile aggression, threatening to slam you into the ground, making you shriek and kick your legs against him in his grasp.
This horrifying sound catches Francis’s attention as he makes his way back into the living room of the house, seeing you through the sliding glass door where he stood. He feels this adrenaline rush through him seeing you be physically assaulted. He runs to where the sliding door is open, pushing people on the patio as he gets himself to you.
He stands up to the guy, forcibly pulling you off him, holding you for a moment then pushing you behind him to protect you.
“Now what the fuck do you think you’re doing?” He says.
The venom in that one sentence from him shocks your system. He was not kidding around one bit.
The brown spikey haired creep furrowed his brows and laughed at him.
“What are you gonna do about it, huh? What, is she your girlfriend? Oh, I’m so scared-”
His taunts are cut off by a right hook that Francis threw, leaving him on the ground with a bloody nose.
You gasped as he fell to the grass, your hands covering your mouth as you shook in fearful shock while a small sense of relief washed over you.
Before you could even process what just happened in front of your eyes, you could hear someone shouting from the open glass door that the police had shown up and for everyone to leave.
Francis instinctually grabs your wrist, dragging you as he makes you both run for it. He gets you to the front of the house and you both are running so hard towards the empty plot where you parked that your feet are stinging from the force. You could hear police sirens in the distance behind you, red and blue lights faintly illuminating the night.
You get to the car in what seems like record time, rushing to get yourselves inside, slamming the doors. Francis hurriedly starts the engine and reverses onto the road and drives away from the house.
You look out the window, looking at the houses as they pass by. He’s driving through a neighborhood familiar to you, as you had driven through it multiple times to clear your mind at night sometimes.
He sighs, breaking the tense silence that had fallen over the two of you.
“Well, that was a shit show.”
You couldn’t help but let out an exhausted laugh. You really wish tonight had gone better than it had.
“I should’ve been around you the whole time. I’m sorry, Y/N.”
You turn your head to look over at him, admiring his side profile as he drove.
“No, Francis. I shouldn’t have picked a fight with him..” you slurred, quiet and defeated. The adrenaline had worn off majorly, and you realized you were still abhorrently drunk.
Francis stops the car instantly by a sidewalk. He turns himself to you in his seat, looking at you like you were insane for ever saying something like that.
“No, you had every right to yell at him like that. He was being a fucking dick. You didn’t deserve that, okay?”
Your head felt like it was spinning as he spoke. You felt instant warmth in your tummy at how fiercely he defended you.
“Thanks..” was all you could muster up.
Oh God, he looks really pretty in this lighting. The warm street light casting a streak across his face, that just looked so concerned for you. You wanted to kiss that face off of him. Make him feel warm inside too.
You felt a giggle leave you as you stared at him, which made him furrow his brows upward and squint his eyes like he was still concerned, but also amused.
“What?” he asked, confused.
You shook your head, still giggly as you made your head look forward through the window shield.
“Nothing, nothing… it’s just..”
You trailed off, losing your train of thought, a realization popping in your head instead. You realized that you really did love this boy. You wanted to see him everyday. You wanted to hold his hand in the hallways. Tease him while you sit side by side in class. Ruffle his hair. Team up with him to make fun of Malcolm. Make out with him in secret, trying to avoid getting caught. Watch movies with him in your bedroom, his warm body beside you as you lean into his chest and kiss his knuckles.
You feel sick as you giggle again, coming back into reality. Oh shit. You had to throw up.
You hold up a finger to him as you open the passenger door, throwing up onto the gravel street, grimacing at what just came out of you.
He leans over to rub your back as you lean back into the car, leaving the door open.
You lean your head against the seat again, wiping your mouth and nose with your sleeve.
“Francis, I’m a fuckin’ wreck without you.” you suddenly say.
“Shhh, shhh, jus’ let me speak alright? I need you around. I miss you so much. I.. I miss when you would pass me in the hallway and push my shoulder just to fuck with me.. Or… or when you would steal my favorite candy from Lucky Aide just for me. You’re so sweet, ya know?”
You felt breathless just from spilling your heart out to him so suddenly, you felt a sob rise from your chest and flowing out of you as tears instantly ran down your flushed cheeks.
Francis’s face softened as he saw you sob. He raises his hand to rub your shoulder and arm in a comforting manner.
He struggles to put words together, but he knows he has to say something in this situation.
“Oh Y/N.. I’m.. so sorry. I had no idea you felt that way.” were the words he chose.
You looked over at him as he attempted to comfort you, which made a choked sob and more tears force its way out of your body.
“Francis, you seriously have to stop me from speaking any further-”
“No, I'm gonna say something I'll regret and-”
“Like I’ll confess my undying love for you and how I just wanna kiss-”
“Y/N!” his shout finally got to you and made you stop speaking, making you realize the damage you just caused yourself.
Your eyes go wide as you look at him, your hands trembling towards your chest in horrified humiliation.
Your jaw goes slack as it drops. There is no way he genuinely just said that. You must be dreaming this.
“Francis, you don’t mean that.” you say quietly, a whining tone still in your voice.
“No, I’m completely serious, but I don’t wanna discuss this while you’re drunk out of your mind. We need to get ourselves home before our parents kill us.”
He starts the car, and reaches over to shut your door. He begins driving down the street, finding his way back to his neighborhood.
The car ride was completely silent the whole time he drove back to his street. When he finally reached where you had parked yourself hours prior, he shut off the car and turned to look at you. You refused to let your eyes meet his after what transpired.
“Y/N.. I need you to know that I really do.. love you”
You took a sharp breath in, holding it for a second then letting it go.
“You don’t have to say that. I know I ruined our friendship, you don’t have to salvage it. I'll just leave you alone forever.” you hiccuped, stray tears falling as you said that forsaken sentence. You don’t ever wanna imagine your life without him.
He heaves a sigh and thinks for a moment on what to say to you while you’re in this state.
He grabs your hands and tugs them slightly, getting you to face him finally.
“I don’t want you to leave me alone. I just want you to see that I probably feel and want the same things as you, was just too much of a coward to say anything this whole time.”
Your eyes still swam with tears as you looked at him. You had held so much back for so long, for him to be saying this to you is making you feel like you’ll wake up any minute.
You wanted to yell in his face, you wanted to kiss him, you just wanted to go home because of how exhausted and drunk you were, you just wanted to sleep this off. You wanted to deny this so badly because of how much you had already ran from.
“Do you really mean that?” the way you said it was so broken down and pathetic, you wanted to shrink away.
“Yes, I do. We can talk about this tomorrow. You should get home and get some rest. I’ll drop you off and walk back home, okay?”
You felt a pang of guilt at him offering to do that for you. You must have been really messed up.
The car rumbles back to life and he starts driving around the block to your house, which is not too far away from the Wilkerson house.
Soon enough, he pulls into the driveway, turning the car off and handing you the keys. You grab them and put them in your pocket for the moment.
He decides to get out of the driver seat to do the courtesy of opening your door for you, which you stumble out of, causing you to lean against him as he shuts the door for you as well.
He wraps an arm around your shoulders as he guides you to your front door. When you both reach the front porch, he pauses and pulls you off of him, holding you by your shoulders to make you face him.
“Please get some sleep. Don’t wake up tomorrow and beat yourself up. I’ll call you tomorrow and we can talk this over properly.”
You nod sleepily, a solemn smile appearing on your lips.
“O-okay…Goodnight Francis.. love you”
His heart stutters at you saying that. The way you look just so sleepy and disheveled made his heart feel like it could explode in his chest.
You nodded and shooed him away playfully as you turned to open the front door to get yourself inside, thinking about your warm bed and badly you wanted to be in it.
Once you close the door behind yourself as silently you can, you lean against it, taking a deep breath to try and reset.
You grab the keys out of your jean pocket and place them carefully in the bowl on the side table by the door.
You bring yourself to walk up the stairs, cringing as you feel how sore your feet are from running from the cops.
You finally trudge to your bedroom door, opening it slowly, walking inside with an air of caution even if you knew nothing was gonna happen. Your parents were gone and your little brother was dead asleep in the room down the hall.
You sigh as you fall onto your bed in exhaustion, you sluggishly take off your jeans from your laying position, along with your shirt. You look around on your bed for your pajama shirt you wore the night before. You find it and put it on and drag yourself so that your head lays on your pillow.
You pull the blanket over yourself and get yourself comfortable. Thoughts swim in your mind about what had happened tonight. You can’t even bring yourself to be anxious about tomorrow and what it could bring, how it could change you and Francis’s relationship, you just wanted to sleep.
Maybe you’ll wake up tomorrow and see that all of this never happened. Your friendship would be saved and you could just continue to act like you felt strict friendliness towards the rebellious boy. But you know deep inside that you wanted more with him.
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