Don't Imagine...

Warning: This blog may inflict emotional pain, resulting in heart palpitations, tears, and, in some cases, death. Proceed with caution.

[dontimagineyourbias]

Where I’ve been...

Hi. I would like to start this off by saying I am sorry for being gone for two years. It might be too late, but I figured you guys deserved some closure.

Honestly, I don’t know why I’m writing this because I highly doubt anyone is going to come back around like “Gee whatever happened to that anonymous blogger I read back in 2015″ but like I said, I just checked the inbox for this blog after hacking back into this account and there are a lot of things I never answered lol.

My surgery was good. I am tumor free and very happy. University is going well, and to absolutely nobody’s surprise, I am majoring in English. Sometimes I tell people about the semi-popular blog I used to run as a teenager as a sort of ice breaker. I have wonderful friends and mentors who care about me and have helped me develop my writing beyond what the little 17 year old girl who started this blog could ever have dared to dream. I literally won an award last week for a stage play I wrote for a class!

Anyways, I thought of a funny post that I wanted to find on my main kpop blog (which I also haven’t touched in years) when I suddenly remembered this blog and I just felt so compelled to go back and read it. I don’t think you guys know this, but at the time I was running this blog, I didn’t have any real life friends. Well, actually, I did, but they were terrible. I was so unhappy in my regular life that I often turned to fantasy to bring myself happiness, and one day my friends in my tumblr chat convinced me to make it into a blog. So I did. And then the universe gave me the wonderful gift that was all of you.

I would not be where I am today without you guys. I don’t think I can stress this fact enough. I would never have been bold enough to submit my writing to contests or read my poetry in front of audiences  if you guys hadn’t been my test run. You supported me through my saddest days and cheered me on through writer’s block, personal issues, and hiatuses. Even years later, I have messages in this inbox asking about me as a person, not just my writing. Even reading some of the messages I replied to on here is making me grin like an idiot almost three years later (Chillnon, if you’re still out there, I love you homie).

Now, to cut to the chase: I think my days of fangirling may be over. To be fair, I’m turning 21 next month, I am going into my junior year of university, and I’m going to be the director of multicultural life on my campus next year so I don’t think I will have time to sleep, let alone write. However, I will leave this blog up so that I can you guys can always come back and read it. Or if you’re a new reader, you can chill too. I don’t want to ever forget this blog or the community that we built in our weird little corner of the internet.

Okay, its 2am, I have class at 9, and I am crying a little bit, so I think this is where I sign off.

Until next time,

H (jokes on you, still not gonna post my real name sorryyyyyy)

[dontimagineyourbias]

Update on my life

Hi sorry I haven't been active lately! I literally think about Tumblr like, every day. I got a job about six months back and I've just been super busy with that. I work about 35 hours a week and that's basically been consuming my entire life. I'm also starting Uni soon! As in I move in in 13 days!!!! Holy shit?!!!!??!!!?!!! Anyways I'm hoping to be more active once I get back into the groove of school and work. Probably not as active as I was in highschool but more active than I've been this summer. I miss blogging! And writing!! Anyways, I'll be posting more soon. Miss you guys & thanks for sticking around through this little dry spell/hiatus thing whatever. -H

[dontimagineyourbias]

Don’t imagine a little pocket-sized version of your bias. Don’t imagine him sitting on your shoulder, playing with your hair as you blog. Don’t imagine him hiding in your coat pocket, following you to school or work, exclaiming “Woah! Giant, what’s that? It’s huge!!!” Don’t imagine having to double check your tea before you start drinking, just in case he mistook it for a bath (again). Don’t imagine him deciding to become your personal alarm clock, whispering “Giant. Giant wake up! The sun is shining and I want food!” Don’t imagine him putting on miniature concerts for you, using the kitchen counter as his stage, beginning every song with a dedication to you.

[dontimagineyourbias]

I see you're still making people suffer... *sigh* same... -chillnon

Of course

[dontimagineyourbias]

long time no see B) -chillnon

I know!

I got a new job and have been working somewhere around 30 hours a week so I’ve had no time to even sleep let alone be inspired.

[dontimagineyourbias]

Don’t imagine a shopping trip to Ikea with your bias. Don’t imagine his face lighting up as you walk through the door, his eyes wide as he takes in all the things he didn’t know he needed before this moment. Don’t imagine him walking around the staged rooms, whispering, “Jagiya, look at this baby crib! It’s so cute!”, insisting that you need it, despite the fact that you’re not even engaged yet, let alone planning on children. Don’t imagine him insisting on trying out every single mattress, pulling you with him to test the “cuddle-bility”. Don’t imagine him piling the cart high with boxes while you struggle to push it behind him as he charges through the warehouse aisles. And don’t imagine lying on the couch as he assembles everything, chattering on about how moving in together was one of the best decisions he’s made this year.

[dontimagineyourbias]

the hogwarts one is my favorite thing in the world rn but also completely ruined me ;-; i don't know whether i'm crying tears of joy or sadness but thIS BLOG IS PERFECTION

Highkey blushing thank you so much

[dontimagineyourbias]

Don’t imagine your bias on Valentine’s Day. Don’t imagine waking up to a giant teddy bear sitting on your bed, the smell of breakfast wafting under the door. Don’t imagine peeking into the kitchen to see him standing at the stove, struggling to watch a youtube tutorial on heart-shaped pancakes while keeping his batter from burning to the pan, his tongue poking out of his mouth in concentration. Don’t imagine wrapping your arms around his waist, nearly falling over when he jumps, exclaiming, “Jagiya! I thought you were still asleep! Yah, go back to to the room, I still need to bring you your surprise breakfast in bed!” Don’t imagine comforting him as he pouts over his ruined gesture, placing small kisses all over his cheeks and forehead, accepting immediately when he looks at you with puppydog eyes and mumbles, “Will you still be my valentine?” And don’t imagine your lips meeting in the sweetest kiss, only to be interrupted by the fire alarm reminding you of the charred breakfast attempt still on the stove.

[dontimagineyourbias]

Don’t imagine your bias as your classmate at Hogwarts. Don’t imagine hopping on the Hogwarts Express, seeing his smiling face as he pats the seat next to him, “Hey, how was your summer? Didn’t you say you went on vacation with your muggle friends someplace? How was that?”, listening with fascination as you tell him about binge-watching tv shows and new apps that you’d downloaded on your phone. Don’t imagine mornings in the great hall, laughing as a howler lands in his lap, and he looks at you with terror in his eyes as he says, “I didn’t think our grades got sent out for another week.” Don’t imagine practicing brewing amortentia for Potions class, realizing with a start that it smells exactly like him-- sunshine and grass and honey. Don’t imagine sneaking to the top of Gryffindor Tower in the dead of night to stargaze with him. Don’t imagine him shifting closer to you as the icy wind sends a shiver down your spine, whispering, “Would this be a romantic moment to confess that I like you? In a more-than-friendship kind of way?”

[dontimagineyourbias]

IM IN TEARS

Baby don’t cry

[dontimagineyourbias]

just popping in to say this bitch is gonna see exo on Feb 12th in Vancouver so message me if you wanna meet up and scream with meeee

[dontimagineyourbias]

I just recently discovered your blog but I love it so much. Some of your imagines really just crack me up, haha. You seem like a sweet and funny person, keep doing you girl! :-)

I'm blushing bye

[dontimagineyourbias]

i'm conflicted about how i feel about you and this blog: on one hand, i love it and how cute the scenarios are... but on the other hand, i hate you BECAUSE I ALWAYS BECOME A PUDDLE OF TEARS like i swear this blog is going to be the death of me

Pls make sure to mop up your tear puddle I cannot afford a janitor and I would hate for another follower to slip and get hurt...

[dontimagineyourbias]

Happy new year!!!!

(This is not a don't imagine) I just wanna say thank you. 2015 was one of the better years of my life, in part because of all of you! Thank you for liking what I make, thank you for supporting me and my work, and thank you for being the best followers an anonymous writer could ask for. Who knows, maybe 2016 will be the year I reveal my ***~~~secret identity~~~***

[dontimagineyourbias]

Don't imagine New Years with your bias. Don't imagine lying on the living room floor, watching the ball drop in Times Square. Don't imagine drinking champagne and cider straight out of the bottle, giggling and talking about your highlights of the year, letting him hold you close and whisper all the things he learned he loved about you in the last 365 days. Don't imagine counting down, welcoming the new year without kiss and whispered "I love you"s and "I can't wait for another year with you."

[dontimagineyourbias]

YOU'VE RISEN FROM THE DEAD OMG!!!!

I KNOW I FEEL AWFUL SORRY I NEED TO POST MORE OFTEN 

[dontimagineyourbias]

You're blog gives me life! ^-^

I hate to be the one to tell you this but my blog is not your mother. It is physically incapable of bearing children. It’s not even a physical thing. This is the internet.

Nothing is real.