B-B-B-Blog

Matilda Dorman

[cappychino49]

Blog Task - Plot - Pataphysical Film

The story is set in German-occupied Poland during the Second World War.

Golde E Lochz is a trained field agent and is a member of the German secret service.

During a previous assignment, Golde refused to carry out executive orders due to a crisis of conscience and subsequently released an Allies prisoner of war, allowing him to escape across enemy lines. He was a high-ranking officer of the British Forces and was very valuable to the Germans.

Her act of defiance did not go unnoticed and the Gestapo subsequently declared her as a traitor to the Motherland.

Since then, Golde E Lochz has been on the run and the authorities have been trying to track her down ever since. The Nazis fear that she will defect and share the German Secret Service’s intelligence with the Allied forces. And that is exactly what she intends to do

Where we pick up is when Golde E Lochz has taken refuge in the Bears’ house. She has stayed there for a period of time. During her time there, Golde and the Bears have grown to know each other and they regard each other with a level of mutual respect and perhaps affection, of a familial sort. They live a rather harmonious life until someone comes knocking on their door…

Intentional referencesmade to certain films include: Inglourious Basterds, X-Men First Class (prologue), Leon:The Professional.

[doorperson]

This is a whale of a time. Really deece set up and establishing of Golde E Lochz. It was interesting that the bears were still literal bears in this, and how seamlessly you made it work. Even though we were already centred in the action, it’s was incredibly easy to swallow that this is a story set in an incredibly realistic period of history, but the story is being woven around talking animals who live like humans. Really liked it

[doorperson]

Background for the scene: Goldie has been in the attic for a week or so now, and her and Baby Bear are starting to become friends. (Goldie being an agent and Baby being a 10-year-old Austrian kid who looks heaps like her).

Mama Bear saw someone get taken away in town or maybe saw a poster of a missing rogue agent, and has had the idea of offering her services to the occupying forces i.e. help in the kitchens, wash their uniforms, essentially enlist. Papa Bear is overcome with worry, pleading with her to run, out of fear for her and their family. They had a fight about it earlier.

[cybiont]

CODENAME: G.O.L.D.I.L.O.C.K.S

COMNG OUT THIS SUMMER

[cappychino49]

Great script and a great intro into the character of Goldilocks as a killer agent. The details are fantastic and wonderfully adds to the tone of the piece e.g the pearl-gun, the garter, red light district. The references to other films such as Atomic Blonde is wonderfully implied. Finally, the presence of Coco Chanel is fantastic and instantly cements the timeframe of the story in place, the idea that she collaborates with the military and secret service is superb idea and really fits! Kudos, another fab piece.

[doorperson]

Noice, noice. Love the badass but dignified vibe Goldie has. Heck yeah on the Coco Chanel front. The idea of everyone just using her and not really seeing her or hearing/requesting her requests is a grand set up for the eventual break from the army that is ahead. Very on-the-nose on the easily discernible but not cliched and over-the-top emotion and character motivation front. Top stuff

[wentocolesandstolemeat]

Three college bears rent a cabin in the woods, throw a party in an attempt to relive their friend of his virginity.

ZACHARY MCDONALD - BLOCKBUSTER BLOG TASK

[cappychino49]

The style and tone of college frat humour is evident which is great and you really get a sense of the three distinct personalities/college moulds that the three bears have assumed in this story. Awesome.

[doorperson]

Right on, right on. Not quite sure how literal brown bears have tatts, but the quality banter and encapsulation of the one friend who always seems cranky at everything but is really just a square is tops. Onya

[giordano-david-blog]

Blog Task 2 - Superheroes & Supervillains

Wake me up, (WAKE ME UP INSIDE).

[doorperson]

Shit yeah, buddy. This is one high-powered start and I am on board. Big emotion but not insincere, and as always a delightfully immersive aesthetic and manner of speaking. 

[doorperson]

It’s real languid and not at all superhero-y, but I imagine that’ll take off in later scenes, especially when Weather Warning and Typhoon show up and start causing havoc.

I don’t vibe the voice-over too much, but hey, dialogue’s important and I’m growing as a person. 

[onepageold-blog]

OK guys, please don’t judge me for the crude jokes in here. I’m writing as Seth Macfarlane NOT as myself. 

[doorperson]

Noice, crude jokes especially. The burnt kimonos were quite chuckle-worthy. Choreographed well, if that’s the right way to describe it. Like, everyone bouncing off each other and influencing the plot with their quips and what have you. All in all a fun time

[regular-old-plumbus]

This was a painful exercise.

[doorperson]

Man, this fits real well. Deece montage and Roger sounds like Roger (well, what little I’ve seen of him), with his little quips and zingers for the most part being unaddressed by the main peeps, which makes them funnier. Y’all are doing our episode all kinds of justice. I like.

[unboundfamiliar]

#vcascreenwriting

[doorperson]

Top stuff. Real well coordinated - with the setting and them all spitting together and the gun funnies - which is a prerequisite for any and everything in the actual show, so well done you. Flowed well, and everyone felt authentic and true to what little of American Papa I’ve actually seen. Nice

[doorperson]

This is the scene just after the FBI/CIA boss dude comes and tells Francine that they won’t be getting the insurance payout for whatever reason, probably because Stan used that money on a jet ski or something. 

I apologise for this. Seth McFarnlane, I am not.

[arithesocialmedialover-blog]

tfw blog task

Scream 

Fast, punchy action. Scream had me hooked the whole way through by the way it used short, sharp sentences to deliver vivid imagery and fast-paced action sequences. At no point did I ever feel bogged down by the writing, which greatly contributed to its masterful execution of the thriller-horror genre. As someone who loves action myself, I have without a doubt attempted to find the balance of brevity and authentic detail that Scream perfects within my own writing. 

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

This screenplay’s manipulation of chronological time really hooked me into its surreal, quixotic world. Its masterful execution of flashbacks juxtaposed against glimpses of present reality all contribute to a wider thematic exploration. Whilst I do not believe I have been able to execute these skills in my own writing as of yet, I have definitely been exploring the use of flashbacks and how the distribution of story information can drastically impact its emotional value, and I hope to explore this style further in the future!

Brokeback Mountain

World, world, world! The vivid descriptions of Wyoming throughout the screenplay really immersed me into the world of the characters, forcing me to care about their existence, their dramas, and their fate. What this screenplay does so well is use the landscape as a metaphor for the psychological landscapes of the characters themselves, and I have definitely attempted to emulate this concept in my own writing. Linking the world of the story with a wider thematic or emotional statement is a tool that I would love to explore more in the future of my writing. 

[doorperson]

Dude, completely agree with the Eternal Sunshine stuff. He seems on another level of being able to manipulate and portray what’s going on and coordinating time, but it just makes you want to explore distribution of information and mess with structure a bit to really ensnare your audience’s emotions. 

The way the writer’s made Wyoming feel was so vivid and pivotal to the story. I completely agree... that rugged and stoic world worked so exactly with their themes and visual metaphors... Grand

[cappychino49]

Blog Task

Scream:

Williamson is a master in the art of economy and demonstrates skill in creating big print in as  few words as possible but with maximum punch.

Williamson’s choice of words provide maximum punch which propels the pace of the story and creates such vivid images of the brutality of the killer.

Brokeback Mountain:

The writers have an ability to create dialogue that carries profound subtext especially in characters who are reticent yet complex (Ennis).  Also, the ability to establish a pattern of speech that is genuine and true to a certain cultural dialect (in this case, the deep south of United States).  

The script also is a great example of adaptation and shows us a way to translate short-story prose into a screenplay form without losing the depth of the characters nor the poetry of the text.

I found the big print to be incredibly affecting, especially in the moments where it captures the unspoken turmoil between the two characters.

Big Lebowski:

The Coen Brothers incorporate a narrator that is both enigmatic and distinctive in voice and point-of-view. To have the narrator infuse his own personal voice through the narration whilst slowly building an enigmatic/enticing picture of the protagonist without giving too much away is a great way to draw one’s attention. 

Also, clever plotting and the use of plot devices which subvert audience’s expectations is something I would like to integrate in the future.

[doorperson]

Yeah, Scream was pretty ace. So punchy and in-the-moment. Didn’t faff about but didn’t feel rushed, and we got all the characters really quickly and completely without having to know heaps about them or be with them for too long. 

Mm, loved Big Lebowski’s narration too. All the fun and ridiculousness of the story just slots in well together and the audience is in that mindset from the get-go because of this hammy cowboy musing about The Dude. Totes agree, son

[giordano-david-blog]

Last Bloggo, Indust. Pers.

Brokeback Mountain

The screenplay for Brokeback Mountain really spoke to me due to how literary it was and how much prose it actually featured. Even though we’re encouraged to be as precise and economic with our language as possible, it was refreshing to see this in a script that was so well-received and praised. I enjoy a bit of quality prose, and I do think that it has a place in scripts when it contributes to the quality and the tone of the story, as it did in Brokeback Mountain. The descriptions of the landscape, how it matched the story, and how cinematic and vivid it was was truly brilliant in my eyes and it kept me reading despite the pace of the overall story being quite slow.

The Piano

Another slow tale, and one that must have been quite challenging for Campion to write as the protagonist doesn’t speak. What I really admired about this screenplay is, like with Brokeback, how cinematic, vivid and melancholic it was, and how amazingly the writing actually captured this. However what I really adored about it was how alive Ada, the protagonist, felt. Despite being mute, her presence on the page was loud and poetic and raw, and we truly got a glimpse into this world of colonialism through the eyes of somebody who doesn’t speak. Not only that, but how music and the recurring motif of the piano not only informs the character and gives her a way to communicate and drive her and her story forward. The piano is a powerful part of the story and having something symbolic in a future script is certainly something I’d like to explore.

The Big Lebowski

The first 10 pages are an absolute ride and a joy to read. To thrust a character into the story so quickly was surprising and nerve-wracking, and the introduction he receives through narration was something that I was quite drawn to. A world and a character were neatly summarised in two, maybe three, pages in a kind of ‘no bullshit’ way. There’s a story to tell about this specific character and it doesn’t waste time and the pace it set was so engaging and certainly a technique to consider if you’re not feeling like a lengthy set-up.

[doorperson]

I should’ve read your bit on Brokeback before I posted mine, because you say everything I was trying to say, just tidier. I completely agree; I loved that prose worked with screenplay format and that it made a quite slow story build and unfold as it should, keeping us emotionally engaged all the way.

While I don’t think I connected with The Piano as much as you did, I do agree that Ada comes across as a very strong presence despite being mute. Her strength, her internal war and conflicting motivations were never not apparent, and to communicate that through a word-less protagonist was quite a feat.

[doorperson]

Big Lebowksi:  What struck me most was the detail. Everything the Coen Brothers want to see onscreen makes it into the screenplay, down to what some voices sound like and how certain characters interact in terms of gesture. It really influenced my own writing in terms of coordinating attention to detail and movement of props to read as important, not like an overbearing writer who wants everything just so out of some knee jerk reaction against having to give the script to someone else to create. Even though the Coen Brothers have arguably not had to face that conundrum in their careers (being able to work as a writer/director team), the screenplay functions as a perfect and complete imagining of their story. It helped me realise that the inclusion of detail can be engaging without necessarily being extremely streamlined to just action. 

Brokeback: The fact that subtextual things like what a look meant, or where a character’s mind was, despite the camera and audience not going there, was a tad eye-opening. My understanding of what big print should look like and be trying to achieve changed, and I saw that incorporating a more literary approach isn’t illegal. While we’re often told that prose doesn’t usually suit screenplay formatting, it was nice to see the intent behind characters and defining silent moments and story beats in writing, and the emphasis on what the audience should take away from what’s being shown on screen i.e. all the landscape stuff that got a hearty mention, helped me see that intent and respect for your story and characters is more important than trying to shoehorn them into snappy descriptions and generalist motivations.

Eternal Sunshine: This was a biggie in terms of visual shenanigans and overlay of dialogue and character direction and minds falling apart and sci-fi that feels more like trippy fantasy somehow being coherent on the page. Even in segments where the amount of manipulation can be a laborious read, it never diminished character or my connection to the story as a reader. This style of turning each chaotic scene into an obviously orchestrated overlay of visuals and audio opened my eyes to how exactly what you’ve imagined can be represented on the page, as long as you know what’s going on enough to be able to convey that to an audience who isn’t familiar with your vision. Basically that ridiculous onscreen effects shenanigans can read well, if you’ve got the talent to sew it all together.

[doorperson]

For/From the Days of Reading

[doorperson]

Raglan Road - Luke Kelly - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8xvkvFviIj8

In Bruges

[rubidavis]

Week 10 Blog Task

[doorperson]

Lovely work. Y’all seem to have yo characters clear and world well understood. 

“Hagrid-esque hair” was a good-un.

I was just unsure what was the characters’ (Todd and Jack) response to the inciting incident in terms of plot... Is it their banter, or when Jack thanks Dragan and Dragan then decides to let them rot a while?

Just wasn’t sure, but if that is the moment maybe make it a smidgeon clearer that that’s a turning point when Dragan decides to be top bloke and postpone his murdering of Todd and Jack.