Disaster

23. She/they. You can call me Noah. I do art sometimes and write shit, but the vibes here are mostly chaos

[caramelizard-deactivated2025122]

[lupismaris]

Do it scared but please don't do it hungry. Please don't do it dehydrated. It's gonna make it so much scarier. Please.

[fangorn-forest]

scientists are in labs right now creating the thinnest and worst material known to mankind so they can make women’s clothing

[thatdisasterauthor]

World's thinnest spaghetti won't please gourmands but may heal wounds

Spaghetti strands that are 200 times thinner than a human hair could be woven into bandages to help prevent infections

Technically they're using it for bandages. For now.

[ghost-gallery]

Quote from the article

The resulting “nanopasta” can then be spun into a tiny mat about 2 centimetres across. While it isn’t intended as food, Clancy says that it should be safe to eat, but is reticent to talk about having tried it. “It’s an ethical quandary to talk about scientific self-experimentation,” he says. “But, hypothetically, one might expect it to be chewier than you’d expect.”

[ralfmaximus]

Oh he's definitely eating it

[special-lucky-chosen-one]

scientists are in labs right now creating the thinnest and worst material known to mankind so they can surreptitiously eat it

[finalfantasyvii]

me with my quilava

[yorgen-sh]

[winterweary]

This made me laugh out loud

[76ello]

Reblogging in honor of the first day of baseball season.

[ceruleanfuckup]

The pitcher that exploded the bird is a photographer now, this is his logo

[hewoweens]

u can be boiling alive in your mind for months and then on a random tuesday ur head gets so clear and life is worth living again and you're like damn what was all that about then

[ilynpilled]

trope i really like is self-loathing characters desperate for the catharsis of punishment for frankly rather selfish reasons who r also obsessed with repeatedly pressing others into hating them and hurting them as essentially a method of self harm. yes baby continue making it worse for urself and everybody around u instead of doing an actually productive and effective journey of improvement and redemption

[dajo42]

using "what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament" to mean "yeah i made an embarrassing reference but you understood it which is also embarrassing" is very funny to me

[computationalcalculator]

my favorite part is that absolutely nobody says this except here. so if you use it in public, it's a dead giveaway that you spent the last ten years on tumblr. but then again, they recognized it, which means they were at the devil's sacrament

[idontgettechnology]

I tested this theory in the wild the other day at work. I was on a call with my department lead and a few other folks and I replied to an email the DL had sent me, thinking that, because he was on this call, he wouldn't notice when I sent it and would not catch me multitasking.

However, he replied to said email within five minutes, asking a question that required an answer. So I answered and was like "Also, I was going to apologize for answering emails during this call, but I see we're both here at the Devil's Sacrament, so I don't think an apology is necessary."

I watched him read that on screen and try not to laugh. And then at the end of the call as everyone started saying goodbye, he goes, "Hey, MJ, I meant to tell you. I like your shoelaces."

And I looked straight into my camera, stone cold serious, and said, "Thanks. I stole them from the president."

And the rest of the team was like, "What...the fuck...?" before he abruptly ended the call for everyone.

So now my DL and I know this about each other. He could be any one of us.

[libraryogre]

At a certain point, the appropriate response to "What were you doing at the devil's sacrament" becomes "stealing shoelaces from the president."

[sensiblereblogifposts]

Reblog if you were stealing shoelaces from the President

[ageae]

[termagax]

"you only like her because shes a woman" yup "you let female characters get away with too much" yes "if a man did this you would hate him for it" indeed

[neenarchive]

really hilarious and unsexy when hetero romantasy authors refer to love interests as males and females. you sound like david attenborough narrating a special documentary on two turtles humping in the mud

[neenarchive]

i don't care if he's the king of the fae. if that man called me a desirable female i'd have him gelded

[berdyayeva]

being an executioner used to be an inherited job. imagine dealing with teen angst and also job shadowing your dad the town’s torturer

[tenmillionpoundsofsludge-deacti]

I hate when I drink all of my drink and there's no drink left. What the fuckkkkkkk. #sickandtwisted

[funstyle]

[recommending something i sincerely love] ok so the thing about it is it kinda sucks

[bigdafty]

Sound very much on.

[chizhik-pyzhik]

my people will vagueblog your people

[humofnight]

i love one (1) disaster wizard

[curlicuecal]

It’s a good metaphor tho, because the situation is never going to get better if you don’t eventually pull the door. And afterwards, no matter what the damage was, you’ll have a working cabinet, whatever plates you could salvage, and a place to start putting new plates.

[artbymoga-deactivated20200516]

Reblogging for that comment ^

[starjeweled-alpenglow]

Hats off for negative jokes turned to wholesome posts

[rosarenn]

So this was me for a long time. Afraid to open the door, certain that all that I was would crash and break. That I could never be repaired.

But I opened the door.

And what fell out and crashed to the ground was not me. They weren’t my dishes.

They were other people’s dishes.

Put inside we without my permission, when I was too young to know that I could not hold them all.

I opened the door, and I’m still here.

It turns out, I’m not that fragile.

[randomslasher]

Oh damn it got better