I have to hand it to Astarion's creators because ever since Baldur's Gate 3 came out only 2 months ago, artists are speed running art history from the Renaissance to current times by recreating every famous oil painting but with the stupid vampire as the subject and I'm like "Yeah, that's right" every time. I don't know exactly what Larian Studio put in that guy but it is certainly working.
I need someone to do a video essay-length deep dive into how 75% of the BG3 fandom fell so hard for Astarion's manipulative seductor act that they believe that's his actual personality. This man has to practice his lines and still fumbles them constantly. He flat-out says it's all a front because he believes his sex appeal is the only reason anyone would keep him around, which is tragic. When he drops the act, he becomes this kind of silly man rediscovering what it means to be himself, and what it means to both love and be loved. He says "I'm all pointy ears, love." while turning his head to show off those pointy ears. Let him be silly, let him be awkward! It's so much more authentic then him being a walking innuendo.
He has a mid charisma stat with a bonus for deception and rolled a nat 20 on all y'all.
Fixed error where punching Godey sometimes leads to a blank screen. Please continue to punch Godey.
You now have to have seen the mouse before you can tell Astarion about the mouse.
Clerics and paladins can now pray for help before resting. It does about as much as one might expect.
Fixed error where poking the Nightmare sometimes locks you out of resting. There was some poetry to that, but it also made the game impossible to continue.
Fixed Malarthi's extremely strange startup error. I think.
Non-rogues can now figure out how the tomb door opens and oil its hinges.
If you have Speech 3 or higher, you can now say a special, elf-specific greeting on day 161.
Astarion will now sometimes criticize your grammar.
Replaced the necklace with a burial shroud for Act 2 reasons.
You can now ask Astarion about the skeleton in the hallway.
Color coded the companions. I am accepting feedback on this. Feel free to argue with me about my choices about anyone except for Gale.
Added a custom response for the name 'Andar.'
You can now attempt to be Drizzt.
New feat: Vampire Enrichment
Added Options menu with Accessibility options to adjust Font Size and enter Color Blind mode.
Made the text in 'Practice Existing' more comprehensible.
Adjusted how the game displays on phones to make things more accessible and readable.
Adjusted how the game displays so that when you are inside the sarcophagus the text will now always be trapped within the bounds of the sarcophagus frame, no matter how much you resize the screen.
Minor typo fixes.
Please let me know if any of these fixes caused new errors!
Fixed error where you can be trapped eternally talking about the teddy bear. That's a different nightmare.
Druids with high Speech can now purr.
Added a different sound effect that plays when you achieve one of the 'Dark' feats.
Fixed error with Gale's spells in the Campsite Intermission. Gale Approves.
Astarion having access to water or Clive now has a more significant effect on his health.
Astarion will now pause to examine all the mysteriously appearing things he finds in the tomb. This may interfere with him getting projects done, but he doesn't know there's a time limit so really can't be blamed.
Made preloading images actually work.
Astarion will now respond in interesting ways if you:
Give him the knife immediately after the ooze attack.
Give him the knife after the ghost attack.
Ask how he is after he successfully drinks blood.
Ask how he is after the ghost attack.
Added new feats:
Irritate the Bastellus
Wyllstarion
Renovated a hallway in the Szarr Palace dungeon. It now has new wall-spikes that you can break to annoy Godey. This replaces the door-latches that you used to be able to unfasten to annoy Godey. These have been removed as they created the mistaken impression that escape was possible, which is against Szarr Palace policy.
Adjusted the description of the stone door to make it extra-super-clear that escape is impossible and that all your efforts are hopeless.
Fixed the sound effect that plays when your friends help you escape.
Lawyer who is like visibly trying not to cry and teary-eyed and snifflign and drawing shaky breaths and hands trembling and constantly wiping his nose on his sleeves but he’s winning the case
The hard truth about autism acceptance that a lot of people don't want to hear is that autism acceptance also inherently requires acceptance of people who are just weird.
And yes, I mean Those TM people. Middle schoolers who growl and bark and naruto run in the halls. Thirtysomethings who live with their parents. Furries. Fourteen-year-olds who identify as stargender and use neopronouns. Picky eaters. Adults in fandoms. People who talk weird. People who dress weird.
Because autistic people shouldn't have to disclose a medical diagnosis to you to avoid being mocked and ostracized for stuff that, at absolute worst, is annoying. Ruthlessly deriding people for this stuff then tacking on a "oh, but it's okay if they're autistic" does absolutely nothing to help autistic people! Especially when undiagnosed autistic people exist.
Like it or not, if you want to be an ally to autistic people, you're going to have to take the L and leave eccentric, weird people alone. Even if you don't know them to be autistic. You shouldn't be looking for Acceptable Reasons to be mean to people in the first place. Being respectful should be the default.
most of the time i forget how silly polnareff's character design is because i'm just accustomed to it at this point but sometimes i recieve a moment of awareness and really SEE him and realise what he actually looks like. and then i get used to it again and the cycle restarts
i'm so tired of the online art influencer mentality that in a sketchbook everything in it has to look amazing and polished and flawless it's so performative!!!! sketchbooks should be for drawing stupid shit
tumblr working overtime to scrub “adult” content from this website only for a photoshopped pic of john lennon’s asscrack to become a top post 3 days into 2022
just learned the lockpicking lawyer is an actual (retired) lawyer.. for some reason i assumed he wouldn’t be? like it didn’t remotely occur to me that a channel called the lockpicking lawyer would be a lawyer
