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In todayâs episode of Midnight Daydreams, we have: Sansaâs Social Intelligence.
I was talking to a friend about the personalities of some characters in the books and their differences from the show, and I remembered a Sansa chapter that shows something very interesting about her, even at eleven years old:
âI had a dream that Joffrey would be the one to take the white hart,â she said. It had been more of a wish, actually, but it sounded better to call it a dream. Everyone knew that dreams were prophetic. White harts were supposed to be very rare and magical, and in her heart she knew her gallant prince was worthier than his drunken father.
âA dream? Truly? Did Prince Joffrey just go up to it and touch it with his bare hand and do it no harm?â
âNo,â Sansa said. âHe shot it with a golden arrow and brought it back for me.â In the songs, the knights never killed magical beasts, they just went up to them and touched them and did them no harm, but she knew Joffrey liked hunting, especially the killing part. Only animals, though. Sansa was certain her prince had no part in murdering Jory and those other poor men; that had been his wicked uncle, the Kingslayer.
I think this passage is a good example of how Sansa was already intelligent from the first book, even if that intelligence was still mixed with naivety and idealization.
A lot of people read early Sansa as if she were simply foolish or incapable of noticing things, but this passage shows something more complex. She is trying to romanticize Joffrey, yes. She wants to fit him into the logic of songs, of the gallant prince, of the ideal future husband. But at the same time, she does not invent a version of him that is completely incompatible with who he is.
When Jeyne asks whether Joffrey touched the white hart without harming it, that would be the typical answer in songs. The ideal knight would find the magical animal and prove his nobility by sparing the creature. Sansa herself knows this. The text makes it clear that, in songs, knights do not kill magical animals.
Even so, Sansa replies that Joffrey shot the hart with a golden arrow and brought it back to her. This detail matters because it shows that she already understands something about Joffrey: he likes hunting, especially the killing part. She notices this trait in him. She just cannot yet accept what it means.
In other words, the issue is not that Sansa observes nothing. She observes. She understands that a version where Joffrey gently touches the hart does not fit him. So she adapts the fantasy to his real personality.
To me, this is a clear demonstration of Sansaâs social intelligence. She knows how to adjust a narrative to make it more convincing. She understands the effect of words â even when she calls a wish a âdream,â because âdreamâ sounds prettier, more important, and even prophetic. She also notices nuances in the behavior of the people around her, even if she still interprets those perceptions immaturely.
Sansaâs mistake is not a lack of intelligence. It is self-deception. She notices something cruel in Joffrey, but tries to limit that cruelty with the phrase âbut only animals.â She has already picked up on the warning sign; she just still tries to explain it in a way that preserves the image of the prince she wants to love.
That is why I think it is unfair to say that Sansa âwasnât intelligentâ in the beginning. What she did not yet have was experience, political maturity, or the emotional courage to trust her own perceptions when they contradicted her fantasies. But the ability to observe, adapt her speech, read social expectations, and understand what does or does not fit someone was already there from early on.
In todayâs episode of Midnight Daydreams: Sansa Starkâs social intelligence, part II.
In the other post, I talked about how Sansa already shows social intelligence in A Game of Thrones, even when she is still being naive or trying to see Joffrey as the prince from the songs. She notices certain things, but she still tries to fit everything into the fantasy she wants to believe in.
The comments and reblogs from you all inspired me to look at a few other moments of hers and make a second part of the post.
I wanted to bring up two more passages that, to me, show this very well: Sansa understanding how words sound, how they affect people, and how a gesture can completely change the tone of what is being said.
The first one is from an Arya POV in A Game of Thrones:
âWe were talking about the prince,â Sansa said, her voice soft as a kiss.
Arya knew which prince she meant: Joffrey, of course. The tall and handsome one. Sansa had been allowed to sit beside him at the feast. Arya had had to sit beside the little fat one.
Naturally.
âJoffrey likes your sister,â Jeyne whispered, as proud as if she had something to do with it. She was the daughter of Winterfellâs steward and Sansaâs best friend. âHe told her she was very beautiful.â
âHeâs going to marry her,â little Beth said dreamily, hugging the air. âThen Sansa will be queen of all the realm.â
Sansa had the grace to blush. And she blushed beautifully. She did everything beautifully, Arya thought with dull resentment.
âBeth, you shouldnât make up stories,â Sansa scolded her, gently stroking her hair to take the harshness out of the words.
I really like this passage because it is small, but it says a lot.
The scene comes through Aryaâs eyes, so everything already reaches us with a layer of irritation. Arya is seeing her sister as that girl who does everything ârightâ: she speaks beautifully, blushes beautifully, behaves like a lady. And that bothers Arya, because it is exactly the kind of thing she cannot do â and often does not even want to do.
But the detail that catches my attention the most is not Sansa blushing. It is the ending.
Sansa corrects Beth, but she does it carefully. She could simply cut the girl off, laugh at her, or say that it was nonsense. Instead, she tells Beth she should not make up stories and strokes her hair âto take the harshness out of the words.â
That is very interesting because it shows that Sansa already understands something simple, but important: it is not only what you say. It is how you say it.
She knows that a reprimand can sound harsh. So she tries to soften it. Sansa does not want to encourage Beth to make up stories, but she also does not want to embarrass her. And I think this kind of detail often goes unnoticed because it is very easy to look at Sansa in the first book and reduce everything to âshe is naiveâ or âshe just wants to be queen.â
She is naive, yes. She wants to be queen, yes. But that does not mean she is socially stupid.
Even in this very early moment, she already understands tone, appearance, embarrassment, and expectation. She knows she should not seem too eager about the idea of becoming queen. She knows she needs to respond with modesty. She knows how to correct Beth without turning it into a humiliation.
It is not yet a mature political skill, but it is already a social skill.
And I think this becomes even clearer in A Storm of Swords, when Tyrion observes Sansa during Joffrey and Margaeryâs wedding:
He drank another cup of wine as he dressed, and then took his wife by the arm and escorted her out of the Kitchen Keep to join the river of silk, satin, and velvet flowing toward the throne room. Some guests had already taken their seats on the benches. Others were wandering in front of the doors, enjoying the unseasonable warmth of the afternoon. Tyrion paraded Sansa around the yard, in order to perform the usual courtesies.
She is good at this, he thought, as he watched her tell Lord Gyles that his cough seemed better, compliment Elinor Tyrell on her gown, and question Jalabhar Xho about wedding customs in the Summer Isles. Tyrionâs cousin, Ser Lancel, had been brought down by Ser Kevan; it was the first time he had left his bed since the battle. He looks terrible. Lancelâs hair had turned white and brittle, and he was thin as a spear. If his father had not been at his side to keep him standing, he surely would have fallen to the ground. But when Sansa praised his bravery and said how good it was to see him gaining his strength again, both Lancel and Ser Kevan beamed. She would have made a good queen, and an even better wife for Joffrey if he had had the good sense to love her. He wondered whether his nephew was capable of loving anyone.
This passage is basically Tyrion noticing the same thing in a more explicit way: Sansa is good at dealing with people.
And what is interesting is that she does not use a single âformulaâ of courtesy for everyone. She adapts the comment according to the person.
For Lord Gyles, she talks about his cough. For Elinor Tyrell, she compliments her dress. For Jalabhar Xho, she asks about the customs of the Summer Isles. For Lancel, she talks about bravery and recovery.
They are small comments, but they are not random. She notices what makes sense for each person. Lancelâs case is the clearest to me, because he is in such a vulnerable situation. Tyrion describes how weak and sick he looks, almost unable to stand. Sansa could have made an awkward comment, or shown pity, or simply avoided speaking to him too much.
But she chooses to praise his bravery and say that it is good to see him regaining his strength.
And Lancel and Kevanâs reaction shows that she got it right. They both âbeamed.â
I think this detail matters because Sansa does not ignore Lancelâs situation, but she also does not reduce him to his weakness. She finds a way to speak to him that does not expose or diminish him. It is kindness, yes, but it is also social reading. She understands what can comfort someone without making them feel even more embarrassed.
That is why Tyrion thinks she would have made a good queen.
Not because she has power in that moment. She clearly does not. She is trapped in a marriage she did not choose, in a hostile court, surrounded by dangerous people. But even so, within the little space she has, she knows how to move through the room, talk, observe, and adjust her tone.
And to me, that is where the continuity between the two passages lies.
In the first book, Sansa softens a reprimand so she does not hurt Beth. In A Storm of Swords, she does something similar on a larger scale: she moves among nobles, saying small things that make each person feel a little more comfortable, flattered, or acknowledged.
I do not think this should be read as mere passivity. Courtesy is a language Sansa understands very early on. At first, she uses that language in a way that is still mixed with fantasy, ladylike education, and the desire to be admired. Later, as her situation gets worse, that same skill starts becoming a tool for survival. And it is very interesting how quickly Tyrion notices that she would have made a good queen because of her ability to read and please people, a trait of hers that is often undervalued by part of the ASOIAF fandom.
ooohh this white man and his weak heart
furthest we've ever been
Everyone draw their favs getting beaten up noww!!
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Some lenshawk and mohawk mark drawings đ€š
Someone misses their mommy!
I decided not to bother with the background, basically with the drawing, ?Âżjust a gif with a Mohawk?Âż
Astrology opinions (maybe a bit controversial)
Asteroids: Only really important to take into account if it contributes to a larger theme in a chart. It doesnât really give that much nuance if read in isolation, unless it conjuncts a personal planet or atleast joins a cluster of planets that contributes to a greater theme.
For example, there is a big difference in a person who only has aphrodite in first house, compared to a person who has aphrodite in an anaretic degree in the first house conjunct the asc who already has an emphasis on visibility from their angular houses.
Itâs a matter of potency. Asteroids already comes second to a planet, so it needs a strong back bone from the chart itself to even be expressed in the person.
Southnode and Northnode: Too flattened as "what you should stray away fromâ and "what you should choose on this lifeâ as the description does not take into account the many contradictions that a chart can have. You can have a stellium in a house with the southnode joining it, so a description like that can be misleading.
Rather, it is two energies that needs to be balanced. For example, a person can have a chart that funnels into the mc and an emphasis on the 10th, but the SN also resides there, while the NN is in the 4th. This can mean that you donât necessarily have to stay away from the spotlight, but rather to make sure that you have a sanctuary to mentally, emotionally, and physically rest in (4th house) instead of only focusing on status, prestige, and visibility.
7th house: another matter that is too flattened as the "romanceâ house when it is also the traits and the energy that the closest people to you see you and experience you as. First house is the mask the world sees, the MC is the public career, while the 7th is not only who your significant other is or the traits they have, but it also applies to you, to how people in your circle experience you.
E.g. Taurus descendant can be the comfort person in the group. It does not have to be the traditional "comforterâ, it can mean youâre usually the ones they rely on for matters of the heart, itâs usually your house people gather in, people usually build a routine around you (such as always going to a certain cafĂ© when theyâre with you), or you make sure your friends are well taken care of in general.
The whole chart is YOU, before it is a mirror.
Placements I can spot from a mile away.
Scorpio placements: Adds weight to any chart. The best example I have seen of this is someone I know with a leo-libra dominated chart yet their scorpio moon adds a very guarded energy to them despite being a social butterfly, she does not like intrusion. In general, they just have an alluring aura to them that you cannot read most of the time. Hard to pin point. Can either look lost or has a tinge of prey-like mannerism to them, like their gaze.
Another example of this is their preference for darker materials. Seen this in another gemini rising who you would mistake as a capricorn rising at first glance. Really hard to not notice.
Taurus placements: I see many similarities with this no matter if it is rising, moon, venus, or even just their descendant being in the 7th. I have a meticulous eye, and there is always some sort of pickiness around certain materials, certain food, or a very attuned behaviour when it comes to their body. The type to know what they want and dont want to eat at a specific moment, and usually they type to know if there is something wrong with their body. They also tend to have a love for perfumes, or a certain fixation with a certain type of material (leather, suede, etc.) Total luxury lovers. If their body feels shit then they also feel shit hence their fixation.
Venus-pluto aspects (tight orbs): Contrary to most descriptions, I find that they are actually really charming. Tend to incite the idea that they are one of a kind whether it be friends or romantic partners, and I do not know the correlation to them usually being seen through a halo effect, regardless of whether or not they are actually a good person. Tend to have had early experiences with love in an early age, tho I have seen this play out this way more if the venus is in aries, or located in the 5th house. Usually also had problems with people getting too possessive of them.
Saturn influencing MC with a strong mars: Will power, a distinct mentality that tends to incline towards stoicism, nihilism, and delayed gratification. If not, there is always something about the way they think, talk, or do things. Goal oriented and hate doing things they think are a waste of their time. Usually seen this bloom as time goes on. Despises shallow matters, can feel alienated and mentally detached when young due to a perceived difference in maturity around their peers.
Aries placements: Honestly no matter the combination there is always some sort of agression or child-like wonder within. Tend to be active and competetive whether that is funneled in academics, sports, or their habits in general. Can be hard to externally spot when mixed with heavy capircorn or pisces but itâs usually expressed in certain impulsives movements, tend to be agile and quick to throw shade back.
Leo placements: Well apart from liking a presented appaearance, they also value being supported, not just for attention sake. Values community, and values their friends very much, the type to invite everyone to watch them play, or to important events in their life. And they would love to do the same to the people who also matters to them. It can be expressed differently, but it is either they just have a hard to ignore personality, or you canât just miss how they look. They can try hiding but spotlight in some way finds them, good or bad.
Should I do more?
Yah?
Yah?
Rising signs yap
Gemini rising: Why is every single one of you symmetrical⊠Gemini risings I have met have a youthful beauty to them, or they look like elves. I could also listen to them yap for hours, even their hands are talking.
Aries rising: A bit odd and random but some of them I have mistaken for being a pisces rising since some of them reminds me of a fish. They look very jovial. Cute eyes. My athletic gyals. Just reminds me of a happy go lucky, or a pufferfish staring at you in an aquarium already puffed upâŠ
Capricorn rising: Chic fashion gals. Though the chic statement is more prominent if the chart also has fixed sign placements. You guys are unintentionally funny. Sometimes unhinged. I like it. Another classic beauty.
Libra rising: You guys take the aesthetic crown. I am yet to meet a libra rising who does not look put together or a fiend for coordinating outfits. Also have not yet met a libra rising who isnât charming or polite (to your face atleast).
Aquarius rising: Only met one. But heâs funny. Reminds me of a pisces mercury but an electrocuted pisces mercury⊠Tall and has a specific fashion style. He is an easy person to be around as people tend to gravitate towards him.
Cancer rising: Reminds me of a fluffy coat. Blessed in the chest area usually and idk itâs either they are pale, has ginger hair, or their skin just has a glow to it. Some of them can also be short. In men, they usually have tattoos.
Scorpio rising: I am sorry. But atleast you are cool and striking. Heavy energy, like you have gravity yourself. Prominent eye area, or a prominent nose, or a prominent eye. Something in the face apart from their penetrating gaze takes the Spotlight. Also sometimes reminds me of an aries rising with how expressionistic their own eyebrows are, the type to raise one of it to gesture that they find something confusing, or raise both of them to gesture to you that they wanna know what you want to tell them.
Pisces rising: Something about them either is very dainty, very slender, or small and yet they also look refined? Very attractive. I only met a few, but they look adorable. One of them has dimples, doesnât look like she aged for the last 3 years I have known her.
Virgo rising: everyone I have met woth this Placement also has strong eyes or eyebrows, more of in a way like they are observing everyone, not just looking around. Gives a reserved expression. Sometimes hooded eyes. I dont also know if it is a coincodence that they all have digestion problems⊠moreover they tend to have fast hands and tend to also be slender leaning (unless Placements in their chart overshadow this) .
Saggitarius risings: Prominent thighs, or a beautiful smile, or an infectious laugh, or the physique, or the personality speaking for itself. They always have some sort of a larger than life presence, especially if not dampened by more intense placements in the chart.
Leo risings: Hair hair hair. Usually has thick gorgeous hair. Gorgeous people. But their eyes also stand out to me, möst of them has round eyes. Also have good smiles.
Taurus rising: Sultry appearance. Usually have defined or big lips, like a cupid bow. Slow moving people but in a graceful way. Usually is the type to check clothes tag to see if it is cotton or polyester. But is also down to earth.
i do have to say that no matter how shitty any sort of media is or how shitty your own creations are. always remember
you're a hard girl to handle, miss frost
casual emmascott ft emma's pink sweater
give you the world if it was mine
Marilyn Monroe