Draco's Playground

Hello and welcome! My name's Drake and I am a pagan queer trans man. I'm also a feminist and mixed race. This is my personal blog, so I tend to reblog what I like and what latest obsession I've picked up. I blog about everything from video games to tv shows, fanart to aesthetic mood boards, science to witchcraft. Have fun on my blog!

[unbotheredmuse]

[laurenzen]

A break is all we ask.

[sleepydryad-blog]

Spell to Get Someone to Leave You the Fuck Alone

Materials:

salt

Throw salt at your intended target and say, “Stay the fuck away from me.”

If it doesn’t work the first time, repeat and aim for the eyes.

[ignescent]

If this continues to fail, track down one of those Himalayan salt lamps that are basically a 6lb pointy rock and start hitting them with it until they go away.

[saturdaymorning]

Capitalism is so fucked up. People literally die because medicine costs too much. Money isn’t real. It stands for some arbitrary number and people literally DIE because of that number. Because they don’t have that number so they die. That should freak us all out. We should be overthrowing the government.

[iwilleatyourenglish]

my leopard gecko hasn’t eaten for over a week so i took him to the vet. vet said he’s extremely healthy and the reason he’s not eating is likely due to him entering breeding season early

i paid $97 to learn that my gecko won’t eat because he’s too fucking horny do anything

[iwilleatyourenglish]

can you imagine someone handing you a burger and you being like “i can’t eat this i’m too fucking horny"

[carpaltunnelz-archive]

me: *has to get up early*

me at 1am:

[rinderpestfeaturedguest-deactiv]

bumper sticker on the back of my big pickup truck that says “God won’t let me die”

[richietoaster]

Are you a “can’t write dialogue” writer or a “can’t describe anything” writer

[bumbleshark]

[eccentricauntie]

[christopheralain]

Art

[marzipanpieplatebingo-deactivat]

[federalbureauofislam]

sorry I haven’t replied to ur texts I’ve been overwhelmed by literally anything that’s ever happened or will happen

[taliagetsfit]

I hate the whole “don’t text him first” bullshit. Text him first who tf cares? And then when he texts back and people are like “ooh you should wait a bit to answer you don’t want to seem desperate” liKE ????!!! Show your damn feelings and don’t be ashamed, if you genuinely like someone don’t turn it into a game, be unapologetically you

[taliagetsfit]

In summary, why do we expect men not to play games with us when ultimately we are playing a game with them?

[gothmods]

me after i get top surgery:

[rhdcarts]

“you’re a writer, right?” Me, staring at the one sentence ive managed to add in the last hour: In theory

[alethiaii]

I feel attacked right now.

[bandtshirt]

go off hubert!!

[no-chill-at-all]

[wildlyannoyingdoofus]

These kinds of responses are my FAVORITE. Some examples to answers to this question I have heard:

1.

“Okay, and who’s the president?”

“Obama, no wait, shit *vehemently* fuck, I hate him… what’s his name…”

“It’s okay, you know who he is.”

2.

“Who’s the president?”

“*drunkenly angry and confused* ..uhhhhhhh…Orange… damn it what’s the fuck’s name….

“Yup, good enough.”

3.

“And who’s the president,”

“Not fuckin’ Obama!”

“I feel ya.”

4.

“Who’s the president- wait, nevermind you’re from Korea you said, right? So who’s-“

“Everybody knows that Trump-bitch.”

“Oh, well, alright then.”

5. (My personal favorite)

“Who’s the president?”

“Ew.”

“Good enough.”

[prismatic-bell]

My mom recently got this question after a seizure. Her answer:

“I can’t think of his name but he’s an ASSHOLE with NO experience–”

“Yeah, you know him. Okay.”

[fenrir-kin]

Red had his operation the day of the election; he woke up to a completely different president. When he was in the ICU, he overheard the nurses doing their hourly checks on one of his neighbours.

“Now, can you tell me who the president of the United States is? It may surprise you…”

pause, then a very slurred -

“They fucking didn’t.”

We live in the UK. Even here we have the reaction.  

[dagwolf]

[jellyfishjammin]

The “I am a piece of shit and nobody will ever love me” factoid is actually a statistical error. You are actually are fantastic and infinitely worthy of people’s company.  That person you used to care about, who taught you to hate yourself by abandoning you, is an outlier and should not have been counted

[ayellowbirds]

this is the greatest and most positive use of a meme that i have ever seen.