Feel free to @ me in posts to summon me! I love it when I get summoned! However, I have a general rule that I can't find dragons in the actual word dragon or dragons, which makes it kinda hard when people summon me to posts that are explicitly about dragons already. Not saying you can't, just that I may not reply.
Please do not summon me to political posts though. I will delete the notification. I need at least one space in my life where I don't stress about politics.
I make heavy use of queue, so there is a processing vortex.
One of my goals is to find dragons in a post where it only works because of a typo in the original. If anyone happens to see a post like that ... well. Summon me asap.
Apparently I also locate dragons in artwork now sometimes, when I think the art is particularly good. Not just any dragon art mind you, only the stuff I personally think is awesome.
See also @great-dragon-yrlitor for my dragon roleplay sideblog
“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted
obviously we know in our hearts that Jabba the Hutt is not a dragon. that’s ridiculous.
But Is Jabba A Dragon Though?
he has the body plan of a lindworm. I suppose you could argue that he is too thick to be considered “serpentine”, but he is longer than he is wide, and not entirely unlike an especially chunky gaboon viper. his upright posture distracts from the fact that he’s built like an abbreviated mole lizard, which are lindworms.
and then of course he acts like a dragon. I don’t know if Star Wars uses gold or something else but whatever it is I’m sure he hordes it. eats people sometimes. disturbing taste for princesses. knights come to kick his ass.
Ah, but he uses a hoversled, which is much like flying:
And not all creatures under the broad category of “dragon” fly. Lindworms don’t fly, neither do wyrms, drakes, sea serpents, or hydras. Lungs/Chinese dragons can fly but they don’t use wings to do it. Jabba should not be disqualified as a dragon simply because he uses repulsor technology to achieve airborne locomotion.
Jabba is unlike a slug in so many ways. He has jointed limbs, a hard internal skeleton, a skull with fixed spherical eyeballs, and no sensory tentacles or pneumostome. He is capable of facultative parthenogenesis--like komodo dragons and other squamates--continuously growing larger and living for hundreds of years hoarding wealth and power and preying on princesses. His resemblance to a slug is superficial, though we may describe him as such in an insulting fashion... like how a dragon may be called a “worm”.
Also he can and does eat people.
Jabba the Hutt is a dragon and I have convinced myself of this.
The dragons from both The Dragonriders of Pern by Anne McCaffrey and The Pit Dragon Trilogy by Jane Yolen are aliens from extraterrestrial planets called Pern and Austar IV, respectively.
I think you will find that Hutts lack a backbone, commonly known as a spine, which, for the most part, dragons have either litterially or figuratively.
Jabba’s motions, limbs, and posture are clearly dependent upon the use of a hard interior support system. Lacking an exoskeleton and being unable to simply squelch out of Leia’s chokehold suggests he is not simply moving around via the hydrolics of a muscular hydrostat. Besides, there’s this art from the making of The Phantom Menace:
“Dragon” is like “worm”, in my opinion. It’s not a taxonomy because the variety of creatures referred to as “worms” don’t even belong to related phylums. A horsehair worm and a nightcrawler are not related but they share an innate “worminess”. A velvet worm has many legs and is still counted as a worm-thing. Like I’ve said before, “worm” isn’t a taxonomy; it’s a lifestyle.
Dragons are the same way. It’s an umbrella term, and while some irritating pedants insist that only a four-legged creature with words god can be considered a dragon, they only say that to make sure everyone in the room knows that they know what a wyvern is. Wyverns and lindworms and amphitheres are obviously all under the dragon umbrella.
If these things are dragons, then “dragon” is as fluid a category as “worm”:
Jabba has more stereotypical “dragon traits” than some dragons do. He doesn’t hit every point, but a dragon is a worm is a dragon is a worm.
My general position is that the use of the word "dragon" to encompass all these disparate creatures is a bad thing and a relic of eurocentric colonialism. A Chinese Long is not the same thing as an English Dragon, nor is a wyvern or an amphithere, and calling them "dragons" belies the cultural differences in which these disparate creatures arose.
In terms of narrative purpose and lifestyle, Janba fills the role that a Dragon does in many stories, however. I would argue Jabba is a dragon in the same sense that a Tsuchigumo is.
I think enforcing a strict cultural differentiation would eliminate most dragons from fiction. Fiction, which supplies most modern dragons, does not stick to a strict historical consistency in dragon-depiction, either visually or behaviorally.
Take, for example, the dragons from The Last Airbender. They’re clearly dragons, as they breathe fire and have wings, but they’re also more like elemental spirits that visually and behaviorally resemble lungs more than they resemble, say, Smaug. Do their similarities to lungs disqualify them from dragonhood?
Also, it’s not like the medieval Welsh concept of a “dragon” evolved in a vacuum. There are mythical creatures from around the world that bear strong resemblances to That Specific Creature Which We Are Apparently Now Inisisting Is The Only True Dragon. Welsh and British folklore was surely being influenced by mythology from disparate cultures.
I am firmly against declaring wyverns “not dragons” because even in British cultural history, the distinction only arose out of the technicalities of heraldry, not folklore or even art.
The only thing that Jabba lacks in terms of dragon qualifications: the innately obvious “dragony-ness” that makes most people take one look and go “oh yeah that’s a dragon”. But i don’t think that that’s a REQUIREMENT of dragon-hood. Like, what the fuck is that thing down there?
That thing does not have innate dragony-ness to me. It looks like a turtle with tentacles.
But, while I think the answer to “can we consider Jabba the Hutt to be a dragon” is yes, no one has asked whether or not Jabba would consider himself to be a dragon.
there’s a whole list on wookiepedia of dragons in star wars and it turns out there’s a bunch of creatures that have “dragon” in their name and they all have quite a lot of dragony-ness but also none of them seem to reach anything beyond semi-sentience. So maybe Jabba has enough dragon-y qualities to be considered a dragon, but he himself would be insulted if you called him one.
i think a lot of ppl assume food pantries are for if you're completely destitute and have no food in your house at all.
just so you know if you forego certain foods because you can't afford them or you can't "justify" spending the money, you might be able to get that food at a pantry.
i was living in a super wealthy area once where the only grocery store within a 40 minute drive was all fancy upcharged local organic and i literally pretty much stopped eating fresh produce because i couldn't afford it. i went months without eating a carrot or greens or anything that didn't come from a can. sometimes i got frozen veggies.
so sure, i was eating. i wasn't starving. i was getting nutrition. but it was nuts that as an animal on earth where plants grow in abundance, i didn't get to eat any of them fresh. people deserve fresh produce!
one day i was lamenting it and my friend was like, "oh yeah i get all of my produce every week at the food pantry."
i was surprised bc she made the same paycheck as me and i wouldn't have thought of either of us as someone who 'qualified' for food assistance. i went to the food pantry and found out because the median income in our town was so high, i did qualify. more than that, they asked for no proof of income, it was more of a 'if you think you need help, we don't make you prove it,' situation.
for like 8 months i got all of my produce (and eggs!) there every week. and yes if i had made sacrifices elsewhere in my life i probably could have afforded some produce at the local grocery store. i could have, i don't know, skipped seeing the one movie i saw at a move theater once every couple of months and spent the $8 on spinach one time instead of the ticket and had spinach once every couple of months.
but the point is the food pantry had more than enough to go around. if i hadn't taken some of their produce, it would have gone bad. the resource was available to me, and there was no reason for me to crawl on my hands and knees to qualify for it.
resources like food assistance are not available everywhere and they can be very limited and hard to come by. they won't be given out just for fun to anyone. if you ask for assistance and are offered assistance in reply, you need to believe that the assistance is available for you.
if a food assistance program doesn't have resources to help you, it'll say so. there is no harm in asking! you will be told 'yes' or 'no.' but you won't know until you ask.
stop convincing yourself that you don't deserve assistance, that everyone else needs it more than you, that you're taking it from someone else, that you should have nothing at all in order to deserve anything.
you deserve to not only eat but to eat well. if there's assistance for you to access better foods than what you have, understand how fortunate you are, and stop denying yourself that resource!
accessing food assistance at pantries is also a great way to help yr community, because you can spread the word and help normalize receiving food assistance in yr community. you can even become a volunteer and be part of the team providing to you and others (i did that and it rocked)!
my point is, yes, there is always someone who needs something 'more' than others. i have been completely destitute and it sucks. but when i went to the food pantry never once did i think, 'nobody better be here if they have more than me.' i was grateful that we all had support.
accessing food assistance at pantries is also a great way to help yr community, because you can spread the word and help normalize receiving food assistance in yr community.
Magical girl who had wanted to be one so badly but never had that magical mascot/mentor encounter so she summoned a demon to contract with instead.
It's not a dark story or anything, the magical girl is just as cute and cheery and friendly as factory standard and never loses that faith and optimism, she's just
Pact-bound to a frightening demon from the underworld instead of a cute teddy bear mouse.
Demon being viewed as weird for making a pact with a cute, cheery schoolgirl.
At every demon party where they show off their pacted there's evil, terrible, and frighteningly beautiful and then there's this teenager in a cute magical girl dress.
"I don't get you Goragog." "Listen, it's nice. Just nice! Can't things be nice? Is it a sin for things to be nice?" "No and that's part of the problem..." "You're just jealous Samantha created a "bffs forever" blingee with me. When was the last time one of your warlocks did something like that for you?" "*on the verge of tears* it's been DECADES!"
Er'trian, Harbinger of Eternal Night, Defender of the Shrieking Chasm, and Lord of Eight Furies stared at eir favorite rival in confusion.
"But it's a pact," ey said. "A deal. An exchange is built in! You can't just Bestow Magical Powers for nothing in return. So what are you getting out of this, Goragog???"
Goragog's dark eyes wept their endless ichor. A halo of eldritch nightmares flickered around his head. With deliberate slowness he turned to meet Er'trian's accursed gaze.
there's a little dragon on the manuscript we're transcribing from in my medieval studies class atm :]
This manuscript is called mssEL 26 C 9 Ellesmere Chaucer from the Huntington Library, San Marino, California and it's fol 1r, for anyone curious! It's the first page of the general prologue to The Canterbury Tales
The sword is unique, out of everything in the museum, because it doesn't need security. It's just... There. On a table. Doesn't seem to be possible to steal it. Only someone "worthy" can draw it - machinery, magic and powers just slip off, it has to be done by hand. It's been here for decades, I remember coming here when I was a kid. The staff let people try unsheathing it, confident that nobody can shift the thing and they'll never lose their prize exhibit, but everyone's heard the legends. Some people think it's all fiction, that the whole thing is fabricated and this is only a hilt in a scabbard made to never let it go by some super as a practical joke. Others that it is some kind of relic, but doesn't have any actual power.
Me? I'm just desperate. I can still hear screams outside the shattered doors and windows. The thing outside gave me a headache just looking at it, but the sound of rending metal means it's probably tearing through the police cars right now. Everyone that could deal with this is fighting the mage that summoned it and the rest of his minions, and they're halfway across the city. This probably isn't the only one, but this one by itself could kill all of us. A few dozen people made it inside but the guards won't be able to stop it if it comes after us.
No curator would be foolish enough to keep magical artifacts that people could actually use on public display. Anything with power is locked away where none of us could get to it.
Except the sword nobody can draw.
It takes me a few kicks to get the door to hall E open, and I definitely do some damage to my left ankle in the process. Hobbling, I force myself through the exhibition as fast as I can move. I have to grab a chair for support halfway through but I make it to the display in a few minutes. One of the guards, his badge says Kevin, catches up with me just as I get there.
"You doing what I think you're doing?"
The pain in my leg is making it surprisingly hard to breathe, and my reply comes out as a hiss more than anything coherent. He motions to me to sit and I just about manage to lower myself into the borrowed chair without screaming. Checks me over, gently.
"Your ankle is probably sprained, maybe broken. Wouldn't be surprised if you've damaged a couple of bones. I can do you a splint, but you're not going to be running anywhere for a while. You want to try the sword, right? I had the same idea, but I've tried it before and it didn't budge for me."
He trots over to a first aid kit on the wall and begins rummaging through the case. I don't tell him that I've tried it before as well. There really is nothing else anyone can do about the monstrosity outside, and hope that just this once things might go differently is all that's keeping me going. With my leg injured I am dead if the thing - and the word demon keeps running through my head unbidden - catches me. Kevin comes back with a few pieces of wood and a roll of bandages, and manages to give me just enough support that I can put my weight on my left leg without falling over immediately. I can stand up, at least, and it's enough to limp over to the sword's resting place. He follows me with the chair so I can take a seat next to it.
"You. Uh. You sure you want to try this? I mean, it's never worked before. Nobody's drawn it in centuries, allegedly. Even the last king couldn't... We could just go, get away from here."
I turn as much as I can in my seat and force myself to meet his gaze. I can see the pity in his eyes, but I also see him flinch from mine. I think he's surprised by the anger in them.
"Yeah. I'm sure."
I shift back to the sword. It doesn't look like much. Old, old bastard sword, tarnished gold-ish crossguard with some very aged leather wound around the hilt for grip. The scabbard is weirder. Pretty sure the base is leather, but woven around it is what I suspect is human hair. I don't know why, and I'm not sure I want to. What matters is that the sword is in it, and nobody has ever managed to get it out, and my life - and the lives of several others - rely on my finding a way to coax them apart. All I have is my own fear of death and the hope that this blade represents a future.
I set my left hand on the scabbard and my right on the hilt. Nothing happens, as far as I can tell. I grip both of them as best I can. No sparks, no choir of angels or heavenly light. I pull on the hilt.
It doesn't move.
A moment later there's a hand on my shoulder. I let myself slump forward against the table and break down sobbing. Can't hear the screaming outside any more, and the sounds of rending metal and gunfire seen to have faded away as well. I don't hold out much hope that this means the demon has left, more likely it's planning its next move.
"Well, this is interesting."
That is not Kevin's voice.
I flinch away from the hand and do my best to twist and look at the newcomer. He's a much older man - Kevin is maybe 50, but he seems to have gone, maybe taken the chance to flee when the sword refused to budge. This guy looks at least 80, maybe older, and is swathed in what I guess would be a cloak and robes. Moss green and English sea grey, and made of wool, by the looks of it. It must be stifling but he doesn't look uncomfortable. He's wearing what I suppose must be glasses, but they're much heavier looking than any pair I've seen, like they were hammered into shape from one piece of metal. Behind the pop-bottle lenses, though, his eyes are a weirdly intense blue.
"Who are...?"
"Most interesting, indeed. You understand me, yes? Speaking your language?"
"Uh. Yes?"
"Good. This will be much easier if we understand each other. I hate having to play charades." His lip movements don't match the words I'm hearing. "First time anyone has managed to get my attention in quite a while, which is a surprise considering how often someone pulls on the damn thing. My goodness, forty thousand this year alone. It's a wonder I get any sleep at all."
He strides around to the other side of the table, peering down at me over the sword. I must be a mess, my hair was all over the place from sprinting in here earlier and my face is probably all blotchy from the crying, but it feels like he's not seeing that.
"What's your name, young... Mm. No. Let me ask a different question. Who are you? Tell me of yourself."
I straighten up as much as I can.
"Morgan. My name's Morgan. I'm 25. Uh, I work in a hotel down the road from here. As a cleaner. And... I'm a woman, legally."
"A woman? Mm. You don't sound sure, but that's of no consequence. Morgan, though? Really? Of all the names... But no matter. You are not a warrior, you have no experience with weapons that I can tell, but you tried to draw the blade a second time knowing that it did not respond the first time. Occasionally, someone does that, but it doesn't help their case. The enchantment doesn't make mistakes. You, however, piqued my interest. First time in six hundred years that someone has tried to draw it in mortal fear for themself and others. You are, as you have probably guessed, not the rightful wielder."
I can feel my remaining courage starting to fade out. "I know, but isn't -"
"I'm not finished." His eyes are absolutely piercing, making eye contact is almost painful, and I'm forced to look away. "You are not the rightful wielder because nobody is. The bloodline died out before history passed into myth, I'm conscious enough to hear this place's keepers telling the story but the story is all that's left and it is twisted in the telling. This is why I'm still hanging around the blasted thing. Someone has to keep an eye on it. Just in case I need to make an exception."
I tentatively raise my head to try to meet his eye again. Somehow it feels less uncomfortable now.
"An exception?" I squeak.
"An exception. It's within my power to do so. I didn't create the sword, but I'm bound to it because this land may still have need of it. So I need to ask you some questions. You don't have to speak. I'll take the answers regardless. Why did you try to draw the blade?"
The image of the thing outside assaults me. Thirty feet tall at least, its skin bright as molten iron, claws like scythes tearing through stonework and asphalt. The terrified faces of the police and a few soldiers as it carved one of their com-
"Enough of that." Reality comes crashing back and silence falls again. It's only now that I realise I can't even hear the hum of the lights or the air conditioning in the building. "Well, that explains a lot. I thought those were barred entirely from the realm, so someone must have summoned it, by design or by accident. I sensed a major magical working recently which I presume is connected to it. You want to use the blade to fight the monster. That makes sense. My second question: Why you? Why not find someone more suited to battle?"
My mind flashes to the others who ran in here with me. A group of children with their grandparents. A young tourist couple terrified for their lives. A news reporter and his camera crew, driven back from the battle they were filming when the thing showed up. A coach party of teenagers, probably on a school trip, their teachers desperately trying to keep everyone calm. The few guards left in the building, not trained for fighting.
"The sword was the last thing on anyone else's mind," I mutter. "I didn't think anyone would miss me if I tried it and failed."
"You would sacrifice yourself if you had to?"
"I've got less to lose than most of them."
"That wasn't what I asked. Would you sacrifice yourself to protect them if you had to?"
An image flickers through my mind. The claws slicing through masonry outside. And through the soldier.
"I don't want to, but I think I could if it was them or me."
"My third question, then, Morgan. Take hold of the sword again."
I think I'm holding my breath as I lay my hands back on the weapon. Something feels different this time. I'm not sure if that's my own heartbeat jolting my fingers or if the pulse is coming from the sword. I wouldn't put it past this one.
"What would you do with the weapon when those people were safe?"
The question catches me entirely off-guard, and I find myself losing balance as my head spins - but the tiled museum floor is gone, and I land on paving slabs. Someone I can't see shouts a warning, and almost on instinct I roll sideways as a massive shadow slams down where I was lying. The ground cracks from the force of the blow and whatever the vast limb is swipes sideways at me.
I bring my arm up on reflex as though it would help, expecting to get it broken in response, and to my surprise there is a sword in my hand - and the thing attacking me explodes on contact with it. The blast sends other creatures I hadn't noticed around me flying, but I'm completely unscathed. One of them crashes into me but fails to move me, and taking advantage of its dazed state, I bring the sword down and cut clean through it. I can't make out any details of its form but it quickly loses shape as the blade passes through, turning to something like ash which scatters on a phantom wind. Fire and lightning whip past me, and raising my head, I see the mage who called that thing up in the first place. I start to charge forward, but there is a lance of white-hot agony up my left leg as my ankle injury reasserts itself and the image shatters into a kaleidoscope of pain and flashing lights, which eventually settle back into the exhibition hall's ceiling.
The old man is standing over me now, smiling and peering over his glasses. He's got a stick from somewhere too - no, not a stick. Staff, that was the word. Big carved one with some sort of ornament on the end of it which I can't get a good look at from the floor.
"Well, that was rather better than I was expecting. I thought you might discard it immediately, to be honest, but clearly treating the symptom outside does not cure the disease that manifested it. I would have accepted your surrendering it afterwards, but what you've just shown me is more than satisfactory, Morgan. And you've shown me more than you think you have, even if you weren't focusing on it. All else aside, I think you're far more a man than you let yourself believe - maybe more than you dare hope, in fact. Maybe we can do something about that in time, if you want, but for now we focus on the present."
He bends down slightly and offers me a hand to help me up. His grip belies his age, it feels more like an oak branch as I rise unsteadily to my feet. It's not until I'm standing that I realise I'm still holding the sheathed sword in my right hand, I thought I would have dropped it when I fell.
"One final question, though this one is rather more personal."
He sets his hand back on my shoulder again, and as he does so, I suddenly become aware of the air conditioning humming again - followed by the rest of the sound rushing back as the screaming and the squeal of twisting metal resumes. People are still out there. They still need help. My left hand moves instinctively back to the scabbard and drags at it. I hear Kevin behind me, starting to shout at the old man. Somehow my ankle doesn’t seem to hurt any more.
There's a click as the sword the museum had labelled Excalibur begins to slide free of its sheath.
He sets his hand back on my shoulder again, and as he does so, I suddenly become aware of the air conditioning humming again - followed by the rest of the sound rushing back as the screaming and the squeal of twisting metal resumes.
🌕 The Witching Hour 🫀
More seasonally appropriate personal art! Some feelings just need to be drawn out as soon as they happen. Here's Isenna, enjoying the crisp autumn air, the forest and the bright moon 🌿
Print, sticker and timelapse on my patreon.
One of my friends was complaining about people using boring pronouns for them, since e uses he/she/they, so I joked that I would refer to them exclusively with neopronouns that get progressively stranger. Thon thinks this is hilarious, but I running out of pronouns. I'm making a spreadsheet
What are your favorite neopronouns? Please share I want aaaalllll the pronouns to properly annoy this friend. The weirder the better.
One of my friends was complaining about people using boring pronouns for them, since e uses he/she/they, so I joked that I would refer to them exclusively with neopronouns that get progressively stranger. Thon thinks this is hilarious, but I running out of pronouns.
Car Trunk vs Car Boot: A clear win for US English, trunk was already a thing in which you stored items, frequently for transport.
Crisps vs Chips: I gotta admit, the Brits have this one. They're thin slices of potato that have been made crispy. No chipping of any materials involved.
Car Park vs Parking Lot: Equally matched. What's a car park? A place to park cars. What's a parking lot? An otherwise empty lot where you can park.
Elevator vs Lift: Both equally fail to address that the damn thing also goes down.
Car Trunk vs Car Boot: A clear win for US English, trunk was already a thing in which you stored items, frequently for transport.
Crisps vs Chips: I gotta admit, the Brits have this one. They're thin slices of potato that have been made crispy. No chipping of any materials involved.
ok so I did some further diving and this isn't so much a new genre as it's just a fairly niche one — 规则怪谈 rules horror, i.e. a horror story told through increasingly bizarre and disturbing rules
I initially came across the online short story 《动物园规则怪谈》, which comes out to something like "Strange Tales of the Zoo Rules." it opens with 15 rules for visitors to follow while visiting the city zoo, beginning innocuously but swiftly veering into inexplicable strangeness:
Rule #1: There are absolutely no problems with the security measures in this zoo. There is no possibility of animals escaping, particularly small herbivores, most of which are kept in closed environments. If you see a rabbit escaping on the roadside, please take your children away and report it to the staff immediately. Do not approach the rabbit or touch it, particularly if the rabbit notices you and begins to approach at high speeds.
[...]
Rule #6: There is no aquarium in this zoo. If a staff member sells you a ticket to the aquarium, refuse them.
Rule #7: If you have already seen the aquarium, please leave immediately and call the phone number marked on the map.
the visitor rules are then followed by the employee rules, which continue to escalate in peculiarity:
Rule #1: If you find an escaped rabbit, do not immediately capture it or approach it. Lead it to the lion enclosure and leave the rest to the white lions.
[...]
Rule #6: There is no aquarium in this park. If your colleague mentions the aquarium to you and seems confident that it exists, stop the conversation immediately. This colleague is no longer
the person you know.
Rule #7: If you see the aquarium, do not enter. Tell yourself that it does not exist and leave immediately.
Soon, the various rules begin to contradict themselves:
NOTICE POSTED AT THE ENTRANCE TO THE AQUARIUM
If you are lucky enough to see this notice, please do not make it public. [...] You have surely noticed from the rules on the map that this zoo is not only unsafe, but also strange and disturbing. We are an undercover government organization determined to protect innocent visitors. Please be sure to abide by the following rules to ensure your safety. This is your only way to escape from this zoo.
Rule #1: Enter the aquarium. There is no one here. Pick up a black uniform at the door and put it on...
versus:
NOTICE POSTED INSIDE THE AQUARIUM
Rule #1: Do not enter the aquarium when there are people. If you are greeted by a staff member after you enter, please find an excuse to leave immediately after reading this notice.
[...]
Rule #7: Our staff wear red uniforms and only conduct daily routine cleaning and inspection of the aquarium after 12:30 A.M. If you meet someone in a black uniform who claims to be a staff member of the aquarium, you can talk to them, or agree to let them serve as a temporary tour guide, but do not give them your map, especially the part torn along the dotted line.
[...]
Rule #9: The aquarium exists and does not serve any organization.
versus:
A note posted in the security room by a security guard working in the elephant enclosure three years ago:
Rule #1: Always remember the color of your clothes. It can be any color: red, blue, or black. Do not change the color of your clothes. It is very important to remain firm in your self-perception. Do
not let "it" find out that you are hesitant and indecisive in your perception of the outside world....
through these found texts, which include official rules, unofficial signage, and torn scraps of notes with frantic, increasingly incoherent scribbles in the margins from people trying to escape, the story builds an unsettling portrait of this zoo through negative space — a zoo that you, the reader, can only catch glimpses of as you try to piece together what's going on through in/consistencies in the found texts
the short story is both puzzle and adventure, horror seeping through the increasingly porous membrane of the mundane. given that various rules contradict themselves, which ones are the rules that will guarantee your safety, and which ones will deliberately sabotage you? which ones were written by someone in their right mind, and which ones were interfered with in order to trap more victims for "its" amusement?
anyway, more poking around revealed that rules horror is a whole subgenre of (mostly) short fiction that renders the ordinary uncanny and the mundane horrific through the sharp contrast of something as "dry and boring" as rules conveying bizarre and illogical information. the specific medium of "rules" places the reader in medias res, situating the reader in a lineage of discovery as anonymous forerunners test boundaries, hypothesize rules, die in obscure and disturbing ways, go mad for undisclosed and unknowable reasons. the subgenre also resonates with video game-style storytelling despite being static; there is a sense of the narrative being pushed forward by "actions taken" and an assumed end goal of "clearing the level" (escaping the zoo)
and perhaps this specific overlap with video game logic particularly aligns rules horror with unlimited flow, because hardly a month after I first stumbled across these silly little blind box theaters that the worldbuilding of rules horror showed up in the unlimited flow novel I was reading, so it's been very cool to see the intertextuality manifest right in front of me in real time
okay! looks like folks are pretty into the concept of rules horror!
for those of you remarking on its overlap with SCP and creepypasta, you're completely right — I didn't do as in-depth of a dive on this genre as I did with unlimited flow, but the various articles that I was looking through noted that recent iterations of rules horror (specifically the ones inspired by 《动物园规则怪谈》, which went viral at the tail end of 2021) owe a great deal to the genre/concepts of SCP
for folks interested in the short story 《动物园规则怪谈》 "Strange Tales of the Zoo Rules," I pulled the text from here and edited an MTL of the text under the cut:
VISITOR RULES FOR THE CITY ZOO
Dear visitors, welcome to the largest zoo in the city. We have collected most of the animals in the world and ensured that each animal has a suitable habitat. We hope that you and your children enjoy your sightseeing! While sightseeing, please be sure to abide by the following rules to ensure your safety. If you do not, you will be responsible for the consequences of your own actions.
1. There are absolutely no problems with the security measures in this zoo. There is no possibility of animals escaping, particularly small herbivores, most of which are kept in closed environments. If you see a rabbit escaping on the roadside, please take your children away and report it to the staff immediately. Do not approach the rabbit or touch it, particularly if the rabbit notices you and begins to approach at high speeds.
2. The ape enclosure has only one street. Only apes are on display there. If you encounter two streets, and the animals on display include rabbits, please choose the path on the left and conclude your visit to the enclosure as quickly as possible.
3. Elephants are huge creatures with fan-like ears, large bodies, and legs as thick as pillars. They are not white in color. Please make sure that you see only elephants in the elephant enclosure.
4. The zoo's beverage store does not provide "rabbit blood." If you see it on the shelf, please do not buy it.
5. Do not stay alone under the shade of the trees in the rabbit enclosure.
6. There is no aquarium in this zoo. If a staff member sells you a ticket to the aquarium, refuse them.
7. If you have already seen the aquarium, please leave immediately and call the phone number marked on the map.
8. Do not feed the rabbits. The rest of the animals can be fed.
9. Rabbits do not laugh. If you hear laughter that is obviously not coming from the direction of visitors while visiting the rabbit enclosure, please tear off the section along the dotted line on the map and hold it in your hand before leaving the enclosure. Do not let go until you have completely left the zoo.
10. If you violate any of the above rules and find yourself lost and separated from the people you came with, please immediately find the nearest beverage store within an hour and tell the salesperson wearing a blue uniform (note, if you see a salesperson wearing a black uniform, please pretend not to hear what they say to you). They will immediately take you to the employee corridor behind the lion enclosure. Do not be afraid: the lions here will not attack you. Hide behind the artificial rock face. When all the white lions have finished roaring, the staff will take you out of the park (please make sure they are wearing a blue uniform). At this time, your family and friends will be waiting for you at the entrance of the lion enclosure. After all of this, leave the zoo immediately.
11. There are only four white lions in the zoo. If you see more than four white lions roaring in the situation described in Article 10, do not leave the enclosure and inform the staff. Wait until the number of white lions returns to four before leaving.
12. You can buy any animal-related toys, including rabbits, for children aged 12 and under. Children aged 13-17 should discard the rabbit toys within one month after buying them. People aged 18 and over are not permitted to buy rabbit toys.
13. If you see someone wearing rabbit earrings following the crowd into the elephant enclosure, you must give up on visiting that area of the zoo. If you violate this article, the zoo is not responsible for your safety and cannot provide you with a solution.
14. The lion enclosure is safe. If you encounter any dangerous incidents that you cannot solve, and you cannot ask for help, please go to the lion enclosure immediately and by any means possible.
15. Be wary of friends who have been separated from you more than once, especially if they repeatedly urge you to go to the aquarium or elephant enclosure.
As long as you follow the above rules, you will have a pleasant trip to the zoo! You and your children will gain countless joy and knowledge! Follow the rules, pay attention to safety, and we wish you and your family and friends a lovely trip!
EMPLOYEE RULES
The park has extremely competitive employee benefits, an overtime rate of ten times the usual salary, a large amount of annual leave, and insurance for all employees. We hope that you will keep the employee rules in mind while diligently working and ensuring your own safety. Life is precious, and everyone has only the one. Please protect yourself on behalf of your family and abide by the following rules.
1. If you find an escaped rabbit, do not immediately capture it or approach it. Lead it to the lion enclosure and leave the rest to the white lions.
2. There is only one street in the ape enclosure. If a visitor reports that there are two streets and the animals on display include rabbits, please lead the visitors in the enclosure to the street on the left and close the entrance to the enclosure. After all visitors have left the enclosure, block off the ape enclosure for at least ten minutes.
3. If, while inspecting the elephant enclosure, you find that the elephant you observe is very inconsistent with the image of the elephant on the sign, stop observing and repeatedly tell yourself that the real elephant is the creature on the sign, not what you see.
4. If you work in a beverage store, please check the shelves once per hour. If you find "rabbit blood" on the shelves that seemingly appeared from nowhere, collect it immediately and store it properly.
5. Trim the bushes in the rabbit enclosure every month, and try to avoid letting shade appear in the enclosure.
6. There is no aquarium in this park. If your colleague mentions the aquarium to you and seems confident that it exists, stop the conversation immediately. This colleague is no longer the person you know.
7. If you see the aquarium, do not enter. Tell yourself that it does not exist and leave immediately.
8. The rabbits should be fed at an interval of once every seven days. No snacks other than the specified ingredients should be fed to them.
9. If you hear laughter that obviously does not come from the visitors in the rabbit enclosure, tear off the last page of the employee handbook along the dotted line and hold it in your hand, then go to the elephant enclosure. There, throw the page onto the grass in the enclosure. Other members of the staff will understand what happened and will not reprimand you for littering.
10. If a visitor asks you for help and claims that they have been separated from their companions in violation of the visitor rules, immediately take this person to the lion enclosure and hand them to the staff there. They will know what to do. During this period, you may encounter colleagues in black uniforms trying to interfere in your work. Refuse and ignore them. They are not your colleagues.
11. There are only four white lions in the lion enclosure. If the number of white lions suddenly increases to more than four, take out the "rabbit blood" and show it to them. Splash it on the first white lion that runs over. After doing all this, leave immediately. Do not follow the extra white lions during this period.
12. Do not privately store, sort, purchase, or wear rabbit merchandise. In fact, try not to touch any rabbit merchandise that appears in the park. If a visitor asks to buy rabbit merchandise, confirm that the person is underage. Otherwise, do not sell it.
13. If you see someone with rabbit earrings entering the elephant enclosure, immediately disperse nearby visitors and guard the entrance of the elephant enclosure until you hear the sound of children screaming inside.
14. It is normal to feel tinnitus, chest tightness, migraines, or swelling and redness around your eyes for five minutes, so don't worry too much. If the phenomenon lasts for more than five minutes, stop working immediately and do whatever you can to get to the lion enclosure as quickly as possible.
15. Treat the white lions kindly. When there are only four white lions, there is no need to be on guard against them. They have been trained to be friendly with humans. If you are unfortunately attacked by a white lion in a normal state but do not die immediately, ignore rules 6 and 7. Do not rush to the hospital. You will not die. After departing the lion enclosure, go to the aquarium — you will find it soon. There, you will put on a black uniform.
NOTICE POSTED AT THE ENTRANCE TO THE AQUARIUM
If you are lucky enough to see this notice, please do not make it public. It is taboo to let others know that you can see it. You have surely noticed from the rules on the map that this zoo is not only unsafe, but also strange and disturbing. We are an undercover government organization determined to protect innocent visitors. Please be sure to abide by the following rules to ensure your safety. This is your only way to escape from this zoo.
1. Enter the aquarium. There is no one here. Pick up a black uniform at the door and put it on. This is the only way to send a rescue signal to our staff. When you walk outside, our staff will notice your clothes. Do not worry about the official staff of the zoo causing trouble for you; they will not pay attention to you.
2. Do not go to the lion enclosure.
3. Make sure there are rabbits everywhere you are: escaped rabbits, rabbit merchandise, people with rabbit earrings, or rabbit blood in the beverage store. Rabbits are our secret code, they symbolize safety and protection.
4. When visiting the elephant enclosure, do not look at the signs.
5. Do not trust any slogan on the map, and do not follow any of the instructions. If you follow any of the instructions, please immediately inspect the dotted line on your map, which was provided at the zoo entrance for every visitor. Tear it off along the dotted line and go to the rabbit enclosure, and attempt to feed the paper to the rabbits as unobtrusively as possible. Remain here. When you hear laughter that obviously does not come from the direction of the visitors, you can leave the area. After this, please go to the ape enclosure. The safe exit will be at the end of the street on the right.
NOTICE POSTED INSIDE THE AQUARIUM
1. Do not enter the aquarium when there are people. If you are greeted by a staff member after you enter, please find an excuse to leave immediately after reading this notice.
2. If no staff member appears even after you see this notice, you can stay here to sightsee and rest. The food here is free, and you can help yourself, but do not consume "goat meat." If you see such items on the shelf, please ignore them.
3. If you enter before 16:00, you cannot stay in the aquarium for more than half an hour.
4. If you enter after 16:01, you must stay in the aquarium for at least four hours.
5. This is an aquarium, which only houses marine life. If you see an elephant swimming in the whale tank, please do not shout or react. This is a tasteful 3D projection. Treat it normally, and pretend it is a whale.
6. The aquarium can be used for overnight stays. There are temporary hourly rooms on the left side of the jellyfish tank for homeless people or visitors. If in use, please turn off the built-in jellyfish night light in the room before going to sleep.
7. Our staff wear red uniforms and only conduct daily routine cleaning and inspection of the aquarium after 12:30 A.M. If you meet someone in a black uniform who claims to be a staff member of the aquarium, you can talk to them, or agree to let them serve as a temporary tour guide, but do not give them your map, especially the part torn along the dotted line.
8. If you violate the above regulations, you will be responsible for any consequences to your safety as a result.
9. The aquarium exists and does not serve any organization.
AQUARIUM EMPLOYEE RULES
1. The aquarium does not need employees to work during the day. Your working hours are from 12:30 AM to 6:00 AM the next day. You can arrive late or leave early. Never arrive early or work overtime.
2. The hourly guest rooms on the left side of the jellyfish area are prepared for homeless people and visitors in need. After work, please check whether if occupants have turned off the jellyfish night light before 1:00 AM. If not, remind them until they turn it off. You have the right to forcibly turn off the jellyfish night light. In any case, do not leave the jellyfish night light on after 1:15 AM.
3. The drowned elephant carcass in the whale area is an experimental 3D projection. No matter how real it looks, don't worry about it. Just ignore it. Do not investigate the switch. It doesn't need to be turned off.
4. The equipment in the monitoring room is damaged and inconvenient to repair, so please patrol once every hour. Sudden power outages and unknown noises are normal. There is no need to worry about the safety of the fish. If you feel uneasy, you can rest in the jellyfish area. The jellyfish area has a complete power supply system, and will have no power outages.
5. It is normal for outside visitors to possess a zoo map. Do not answer the question of where the aquarium is located in the zoo. If the other party insists on asking, you can leave the interaction immediately.
6. Remember to charge the jellyfish night light before leaving work on Sunday. Do not forget to do so, no matter what.
7. Change the food on the shelf once a day. If you find unfamiliar food marked "goat meat," please put it a separate storage box in the whale area. Someone will handle it for you.
8. You can walk anywhere in the aquarium during work, but do not leave the aquarium. If the overnight visitors try to leave before 6:00 AM, try to dissuade them. If you cannot stop them, there is no need to get into a physical fight or to follow them out. Simply continue to do your own work.
9. If the overnight visitors wear uniforms similar to yours but in black, refuse their stay and drive them away with force. There are electric batons and tranquilizer guns on the workbench in the jellyfish area.
10. If the overnight guests bring rabbit merchandise, steal them after they fall asleep and put them in the storage box in the whale area. The guests will not ask you for these items after they wake up.
11. If overnight guests try to chat with you, you can speak with them so long as it does not delay turning the lights off in time. Do not mention the zoo. If the other party mentions it, change the subject immediately.
12. The aquarium is independently operated and there is no zoo outside. Keep this in mind.
A note picked up by tourists with a scribbled note on the corner: "escape and survive"
1. "Rabbit blood" does not exist, it is "goat meat" (this note was repeatedly written and crossed out, and the crossed-out content is unclear)
2. The goat enclosure is an elephant (a crookedly-drawn elephant with rabbit ears is drawn under this sentence)
3. Rabbits will eat apes (this sentence was crossed out, and the word "ape" is circled with a question mark). You cannot talk to the staff in the ape enclosure, you cannot go out, you cannot feed the apes, and you cannot enter when there is only one road.
4. You cannot enter the aquarium when no one is there.
5. Only "goat meat" is edible.
6. If the lights are turned off in the aquarium at night, you can stay overnight in the aquarium. They will not lock the door.
7. The first four white lions are apes, the fifth white lion is a goat, the rabbit is an elephant, blue is black (this sentence is emphasized)
8. You are an elephant. (this sentence is written in extremely poor handwriting)
9. I am a goat. (this sentence is written in extremely neat handwriting)
Someone left a piece of paper in the guest room on the left side of the jellyfish area of the aquarium. It has been placed in the storage box of the whale area by the staff:
(The beginning and edge of the paper are full of scribbles of "so scared" “I want to get out alive” "don't believe" "believe" "all messed up" "must write it down," and the place where the title should be written is heavily scribbled over in black pen with the sentence "if you don't do this, you definitely will not get out")
1. Apes and white lions can see "it," jellyfish and rabbits can comfort "it," elephants and goats are "its" puppets.
2. Believe in the white lions. White lions bite people who can be saved, white lions bite people who cannot be saved, the roar of white lions is the alarm to drive "it" away, the roar of white lions is a dirge to mourn the dead.
3. You will be discovered if you change clothes, don't change clothes (in sloppy and wild handwriting: “unity, courage and unwavering loyalty are the greatest advantages of human beings”)
4. The security guards in the elephant enclosure can be trusted, but they will go off work at 1:00 AM every day, so you must ask for help before then.
5. "It" likes lights, especially at night. "It" hates confined spaces and must rest in dark, confined rooms.
6. Fuck me! Goat meat is real raw meat! (this sentence is messier than the other sentences; there is a line of slightly less messy writing behind it: "it's fucking edible somehow")
7. You will not be discovered while standing with the apes.
8. Humans have two eyes that are arranged horizontally on both sides of the nose. Anything else is not human. If the appearance of humans has changed, that means they are being watched by "it." Remember humans. Do not trust humans who are not human.
9. Do not pay attention to tourists who are smiling and visiting. They haven't discovered anything. Look for visitors who are as scared as I am. They are trustworthy and they already know.
10. Thank the dried jellyfish and drowned elephants. Remember that they all died to protect humanity.
11. There is an exit, but it is not in the ape enclosure. I don't know what is outside the ape enclosure.
12. Always remember that you are a human, not an animal.
DOCUMENTS FROM THE ZOO DIRECTOR’S OFFICE
(No title, no introduction, just a printed document taped to a wooden table)
1. Accept any employee, no matter what color they wear. Although the zoo only provides blue uniforms, if someone shows up wearing the same style of black or red uniforms, treat them as an employee.
2. It is normal to hear children crying and laughing outside the office door when no one is around. Ignore it, pretend not to hear it, and don't show any anxiety or irritability.
3. Employees are not allowed to bring pets to the zoo. If someone insists on violating this rule, there is no need to fine them, just ask them to bear the consequences themselves.
4. Check the number of white lions in the lion enclosure every three days, and record the frequency of changes in the number of white lions and store it the spreadsheet in the computer folder labeled "it". Do not ask what "it" refers to. Do not rename the file. Do not talk about this folder with others, including family members.
5. There must be a part on each map that can be torn off along the dotted line, and the map must be produced by a specific manufacturer. The manufacturer's contact information is stored in the Word document in the folder. The office needs to have at least three maps ready for use at any time.
6. No matter how often the security guards in the elephant enclosure resign or how outrageous their welfare demands are, treat them well and try to meet their demands. They are not making trouble for no reason. It is best not to delve into the reasons for their demands.
7. While inspecting the work of employees, if you see employees catching escaped rabbits, picking up dried jellyfish or rabbits killed by white lions, this is normal. There is no need to blame or question them, but please check that they have properly handled all materials.
8. The office must keep the lights on between 1:15 AM and 6:00 AM, even if no one is there. The power supply equipment here is stronger than anywhere else in the park. Power outages are abnormal. If they occur, immediately tear off the section along the dotted line on the spare map on the right side of the desk and walk out holding it in your hand. Tell the first employee you meet, no matter what color uniform they are wearing or what task they are about to do. Ask them to help you deal with the power outage. They will not refuse you.
9. Do not delve into whether the aquarium exists. If you see the aquarium, you can go in and take a walk. While outside, please follow the notice posted at the entrance to the aquarium. While inside, please follow the notice posted inside the aquarium. If there are any contradictions between the two, decide which one to follow based on your position when you see the notice.
10. There are only ape and white lion toys on the sofa in the office. When goat, rabbit, or elephant toys appear, there is no need to work indoors today. Leave until the monitoring room staff informs you that the extra toys are gone.
11. You can take naps, but if you decide to work the night shift, do whatever it takes to stay awake. Do not take a nap. If you are unsure of your mental state, do not work the night shift.
12. The monitor will occasionally be damaged. To determine whether it is normal damage, please check whether there is animal fur on the camera. If so, do not repair the monitor within a month. If necessary, you can prepare a miniature camera to replace it. After informing them of the situation, the finance department will reimburse the cost of the camera.
13. It is normal for dried jellyfish to appear in the trash can. Just remind the janitor when they come to throw away the garbage.
14. If you violate any of the above rules, spend 13 hours in the office pretending nothing happened. For meals, please order takeout and ask the staff to deliver it to you. Do not leave the office, do not look directly at the delivery person or the staff, and do not look in the mirror. Always remind yourself that humans have two eyes, and only two eyes.
15. Always remember that the safety of human lives is more important than animal lives. Sacrifice any animal when necessary. Do not be soft-hearted. You do not know if they are animals.
A note posted in the security room by a security guard working in the elephant enclosure three years ago:
Hello, people who taken over my shift, people who came to the security room by chance, or newcomers who see this note in the future. Please follow these rules during your work. This is my accumulated knowledge and experience for maintaining safety and mental stability. I don’t want to lose any colleagues again, and I don't want to experience inexplicable things again. I believe you don't want to, either. After reading these words, pretend you did not see them and keep doing your work.
1. Always remember the color of your clothes. It can be any color: red, blue, or black. Do not change the color of your clothes. It is very important to remain firm in your self-perception. Do not let "it" find out that you are hesitant and indecisive in your perception of the outside world.
2. Believe. Believe. Believe. Humans are worthy of your trust, and only humans are worthy of it.
3. Rabbits eat people, but people wearing rabbit earrings do not. The shade cast by trees eats people, but people trimming the trees do not. Elephants eat people, but people who look at elephants do not, and people who do not look at elephants do not. White lions eat people, but glowing jellyfish do not. (in childish handwriting: "Because jellyfish don't have brains?")
4. "It" cries when it is thwarted, and laughs when it succeeds. Do not worry about what "it" is, just stay away from it as long as you find it. They do not know yet.
5. Food that appears on the shelves anywhere for no reason is temptation. Do not look at the labels on the food, and do not pay attention to what others call it. Ignore it, and if necessary, buy it as if it is ordinary food and eat it. Don't let "it" know that you have noticed "it" already.
Rule #1: There are absolutely no problems with the security measures in this zoo. There is no possibility of animals escaping, particularly small herbivores, most of which are kept in closed environments. If you see a rabbit escaping on the roadside, please take your children away and report it to the staff immediately.
Being a ranger I spend a lot of time alone in the wilderness for hours in the company of one of four co workers.
One such worker for the purpose of this post we shall refer to as Dave.
Dave is a very quiet man. He confesses that if conversation happens too quickly and for too long he gets tired so we often work in silence. He's very polite and good natured but it's obvious that he would happily live and work alone for the rest of his life given the option.
He's very much in the previous generation of ranger, a practical man in his fourties or fifties happy to be kept physically busy for a day and then be sent home with some pay. I had to show him how to use a work issued smart phone.
Meanwhile the rest of the team is made up of the current generation of rangers; openly nurodivergent queer women in their twenties or thirties who work this job because it's the only setting where we can vaguely look sane.
So Dave sticks out a bit. It's really nice when he opens up though because he's an impulsive individual when left to his own devices and has plenty of stories to tell if the mood takes him. I really like working with Dave.
Anyway, one day we've got a job that takes a three hour hike to get to and early on the topic of deer comes up.
I hadn't realised this was the first time we had discussed deer, but blatantly it was. Dave's entire demeanour changes, there's a bit of passion in his voice, but it's also hushed as if he's talking about something sacred.
"Deer are my favourite animal." He says.
I'm also eager to hear Dave talk about himself, so I encourage him to say more.
"I'd love to be a deer myself."
And more
"If a genie offered me the opportunity to become a deer I'd take it. I wouldn't even stop to ask what the price was."
And more
"Sometimes I feel like I'm a deer having a dream about being a human.*
And there I am, a long time commuter to the therian/otherkin community keeping up the encouraging face of someone being politely interested, knowing that this man is straight up a therian with no frame of reference.
And I decided that I wouldn't push the subject outside of the bounds of what Dave is comfortable with, I wouldn't try to teach him the terms "Therian" or "Otherkin" but absolutely I would talk with this man as if he's a deer.
And it's a bit magical really. He's an impulsive individual so I have to talk him out of some risky choices every so often and "this is why deer like you keep getting stuck in fences" has become this magical phrase that allows him to step down from a mistake with a bit of a smile on his face.
And it's a bit magical really. He's an impulsive individual so I have to talk him out of some risky choices every so often and "this is why deer like you keep getting stuck in fences" has become this magical phrase that allows him to step down from a mistake with a bit of a smile on his face.
A fantasy book that is a pseudotranslation of a mysterious found ancient text, but from context clues thorough the story it's clear that the translation isn't the first or only one, but that this current translator is a fearlessly controversial figure who has physically fought other scholars over what some specific passages mean, and will do it again. There is ocassionally a footnote where the translator explicitly clarifies which rival scholar they will fight over this particular word choice.
There is one character in the story who is clearly contextually nonbinary, and several explicitly homosexual romantic relationships. The mentions of these sometimes have footnotes like "fight me about it Greg, you bulldog-faced fuck. You know where I live."
A fantasy book that is a pseudotranslation of a mysterious found ancient text, but from context clues thorough the story it's clear that the translation isn't the first or only one, but that this current translator is a fearlessly controversial figure who has physically fought other scholars over what some specific passages mean, and will do it again.
this is a bit different from my usual stuff, but here goes.
someone tagged me recently on this post, and I wanted to take a moment to talk about it:
[image id: a tumblr post saying "OMG I JUST FOUND THAT SOMEONE MADE THIS REALISTIC DRAGON RING AND I CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT IT", then four pictures of an (admittedly very cool looking) dragon ring, and then a red link saying "For the people asking I found the ring for sale HERE". The name of the original poster is cropped out.]
This is an ad.
On other platforms, influencers get payed money to support products, and often gain a commision from doing so. (I believe there's rules in place in at least some places that if you're doing something like that you're required to say so, but I'm not sure.)
Tumblr, of course, will get really mad at people trying to be influencers and advertise products. But companies still sometimes want to market here (for whatever reason). So from what I've heard, what sometimes happens is they'll ask people to advertise their products, but to pretend that it's not actually an ad, that it's just something they found and got really excited about.
This is, of course, possibly illegal (i really don't know), but definitely unethical. But, unfortunately, it's effective. We know to ignore ads ... but this isn't an ad, right? It's just someone who found something they really liked and wanted to share it, right? And they include a link so that ... you can get one too.
These posts almost always look like "Oh wow I found this really cool thing it's so cool I love it! (image) OH I FOUND THE LINK YOU CAN BUY IT HERE". Do not trust those. Those are ads. Do not interact with them, do not reblog them. They have no place here.
Out of curiosity, I clicked on the op's blog a bit and scrolled through. It was ... eery. Almost entirely images. A few memes, a whole bunch of "aesthetic" posts - pics of cats in onesies, pics of decorated cakes, etc. Didn't see any text posts on the first page. And, scattered through it, several other ads: a picture of a mug with an "Omg found the mug here!", a tiktok video of a shark onesie and a "omg i found the pajamas shark here!!".
Overall: this isn't a tumblr blog. this isn't someone using tumblr as tumblr. this is someone trying to have a normal looking blog (and failing because this isn't instagram or something, we do text posts here good sir, get with the program already) and trying to peddle merch. It usually won't go anywhere. But it just takes one or two making the rounds - I'm a decently large blog after all. If I had reblogged that dragon ring ad? That's coverage. And that's the advertiser getting what they wanted. Because, after all, why would any of you expect something I posted to be an ad? I'm not a corporation or an influencer after all, so why would you check.
I'm not going to say the name of the OP or the name of the person who tagged me because I don't want them getting any backlash from this. I just want all of you to be aware of this, watch out for it.
